Even bigger UO than the maternity shoot opinion: engagement photos are just as dumb.
Totally agreed. Engagement and maternity shoots are dumb.
Gonna add newborn shoots as well. The ones where they don't even have any distinguishing features yet and just look like a little potato wrapped up in an ace bandage. No thanks. I'm not sure why everything has to warrant a "professional" photoshoot. Probably just gonna take pics of my baby with my phone and call it a day.
I will say, and this is maybe an unpopular opinion, that in the quest for gender neutral clothing (which I support and I love) I do want to be very careful that gender neutral doesn't equal just shopping in the boys' section or defaulting to boy clothes, which I have noticed is the case sometimes. Of course I think it's so, so, so important that we don't teach our girls that robots and astronauts are boy things, but it's also very important not to teach them that traditionally feminine things like pink or dresses or whatever is lame. I was taught by society very early on that girly things were stupid and boy things were cool, and I think that's very damaging and makes it difficult for all kids to determine their true interests and likes. I like to approach things more from a gender rainbow perspective - try ALL the colors, wear the dresses, play with trucks, be a princess, be a soccer star, go to science camp, play with dolls, like...all of it, and treat all of it with equal enthusiasm, so the kid can figure out which of those things are truly fun and cool to them.
You explained this perfectly! Wholeheartedly agree!
Even bigger UO than the maternity shoot opinion: engagement photos are just as dumb.
Totally agreed. Engagement and maternity shoots are dumb.
Gonna add newborn shoots as well. The ones where they don't even have any distinguishing features yet and just look like a little potato wrapped up in an ace bandage. No thanks. I'm not sure why everything has to warrant a "professional" photoshoot. Probably just gonna take pics of my baby with my phone and call it a day.
@hkom at the hospital we use they have a couple ladies come by the room and take pictures right there. They just use the blankets on the bed, I didn't even have to get up from it lol. I ended up buying some of those, but I didn't do a professional shoot at any point. And baby was not wrapped up like a burrito.
My UO I'm not a fan of "baby burritos". Yes I will swaddle my child if that's what comforts him/her, but do not call him/her a burrito, you don't get to eat my child.
And FFC, I'm sad I never got a maternity shoot when I was pregnant with DS. We just couldn't afford it. We've got a friend who enjoys photography and does it more as a hobby, so I may see if she'll take some pics later on this time! I think the ones with the older sibling are cute. Since our LO this time will be born late Nov/early Dec (depending on when they decide to induce) I'm gonna see if she'll do some photos of new baby and current DS for our Christmas card.
@texas_t I'm in sewing groups on Facebook, and one of the fabric companies sold burrito fabric...looks like a tortilla, lettuce, tomato, cheese, guac...and people make baby wraps/blankets with them.
Heres the fabric, not a wrap or blanket obviously.
The thing with gender neutral clothes is that it doesn't matter. I'd bring DD to stores in pink shirts with bows in her hair, and people would still call her a boy. It made no sense.
And we definitely shopped around the boy's department for some of DD's clothes, and DS wears her old clothes if he likes them. I think his favorite piece is one of her pink nightgowns, actually.
But even at 3, being exposed to all the pink and princesses and bows, my boy still loves blue the best and trucks and dinosaurs and ninja turtles. And my DD, bless her heart, loves pink and purple the best and love dancing and fairies and wants to grow up to be a mommy (which, as it turns out, means leaving your DH at home with the kids to go to your fun job, so it's not as bad as it sounds, but still).
So honestly, I'm going to enjoy dressing this kid in whatever the hell I want to while I can, because it doesn't seem to matter one iota what they end up liking and they'll have strong opinions about it way sooner than I'd like.
@maureenmce I totally agree, the quest for gender neutral anything often devalues all that’s feminine (and thus girls/women as well) and contirbutes to a very narrow definition of acceptable masculinity. Hence why it’s so often acceptable for a girl to be a “Tom boy” but we don’t even have an equivalent name for a boy who likes traditional feminine/“girl” things that isn’t an insult. That’s why I bought a cute solar system baby shirt from the “boy” section, but I also bought this adorable “girl” shirt complete with flowers, dainty lettering, and gold paint (feminine stuff). I will 100% put it on my baby. (I said this earlier but now I have an excuse to be an AW and share the image of the shirt because it’s was such a cute thrift store find)
Oh on the topic of gener neutral...our grocery store has the car carts for kids, and DS would always request the pink car! It would make DH so frustrated, "well what if a little girl wants that car?" I'd respond, "well what if a little girl wants the black/blue/red/orange car instead?" Moot point now, they got a new one and it's a green tractor...pretty sure DS will have a new favorite.
I get the most irritated with gender labeled cups and bottles. JFC. Why does this have to be a girl bottle or a boy bottle? WHY? My son sure did drink out of a bottle with pink and turquoise all over it and plain pink and purple bottles. To many comments about it to even entertain. Le sigh.
oh, SPEAKING of those carts with the cars. I'm one of THOSE parents. I get so irritated when they don't have any available, and then I see people with only one kid riding around in one of those while I have one kid in the cart and am trying to keep the other wrangled by my side. I don't ever say anything, but I get SO salty. I guess I wish they made them with just one seat in them, too, so people with only one kid wouldn't have to take the only option I have for containing my two children. Because I get it, they're fun, and kids shouldn't have to miss out because they don't have a sibling. This is really circular but mostly I'm pregnant and tired and sick of chasing children around the store. ::harumph::
oh, SPEAKING of those carts with the cars. I'm one of THOSE parents. I get so irritated when they don't have any available, and then I see people with only one kid riding around in one of those while I have one kid in the cart and am trying to keep the other wrangled by my side. I don't ever say anything, but I get SO salty. I guess I wish they made them with just one seat in them, too, so people with only one kid wouldn't have to take the only option I have for containing my two children. Because I get it, they're fun, and kids shouldn't have to miss out because they don't have a sibling. This is really circular but mostly I'm pregnant and tired and sick of chasing children around the store. ::harumph::
*slowly raises hand* that'd be me...lol. I also feel so horrible when DS decides to be a butthead and doesn't want to ride, he'd rather be carried or help push, but by that point we're already halfway done shopping, and I'm not about to get a new cart. Or, sometimes I've had DH take DS to the car because he's just screaming for no reason (or I said no candy or something), so then I'm standing in line to check out with a car cart and no kid.
Also, any store that has the cars at the bottom of the cart? You suck. My kid can climb out and run away. He can't do that if he's up high.
@tumbleweed-1 Love your thoughts and love that shirt!
Also, another UO - go overboard buying clothes the first year! Everyone says not to, since they're just babies and they don't "need" a huge/cute wardrobe since they're going to be sleeping and spitting up all the time (and, of course, they don't) BUT if your kiddos are anything like mine, they will be very stubbornly picking out their own clothes from like, 1 on and you'll never get to buy them anything adorable again. My DD is VERY particular about her "look" and it is hilarious and I love her style, but also I miss picking out stuff for her!
@runrinserepeat I get similarly offended by people using things that I need and they don’t. In college when classmates used the rare (or sometimes only) left handed desk for their laptops and I take hand written notes and am left handed. Excuse me! That’s my only seat that I don’t have to sit all turned sideways and awkward. Same deal now, I drive a diesel vehicle and I live in a city (so only about 1/3 of gas stations have diesel and the ones that do have 1 diesel pump usually). Inevitably, a car will block my diesel pump because the aisle still has regular gas too. And it’s like being left handed all over again. Plus I hold up the line waiting for my designated spot. At least I could sit in a right handed desk- but I have to use that diesel pump. I’m one of those a-holes who will cut you off if it’s open because I’m not waiting around an extra 20 mins because you couldn’t wait 3 mins for any one of your regular lanes to be open. (Not “you”- just the cars in my way at the gas station).
Just gonna drop my religious potato right here Although this was taken closer to 3 months — we had new-newborn pics scheduled but then he spent 3 weeks in the NICU and I wanted to get all the oxygen paraphernalia out of the house before we brought the photographer in.
This time around I don’t think I’ll hire anyone. I got a really nice DSLR for Christmas and feel fairly confident that I can capture all the sweet stuff myself.
Me: 31 | DH: 31
Together since 2003 | Married 2010 TTC #1 January 2016 BFP April 18 2016 | EDD December 29, 2016 Welcome baby A! January 9, 2017
TTC#2 March 2018 BFP March 30, 2018 | EDD December 12, 2018
@LLynde5 got it! He-Man was an 80s cartoon about a prince who turned into the most powerful man in the universe when he held up his magic sword and said “by the power of greyskull!” It’s obviously badass.
@tumbleweed-1 Some folks have no gas pump courtesy! I get extra miffed when people leave their cars at the pump and go inside after filling the tank. C’mon people! It’s not a parking space! They need lessons on courtesy and compassion towards others.
NTNP since Dec 2012 | TTC since Jan 2016 Dx: Unspecified IF BFP#1 Nov 2017 • Blighted Ovum + MMC • D&C at nine weeks BFP#2 Apr 2018 • It's a boy! • Born 13 Dec 2018
oh, SPEAKING of those carts with the cars. I'm one of THOSE parents. I get so irritated when they don't have any available, and then I see people with only one kid riding around in one of those while I have one kid in the cart and am trying to keep the other wrangled by my side. I don't ever say anything, but I get SO salty. I guess I wish they made them with just one seat in them, too, so people with only one kid wouldn't have to take the only option I have for containing my two children. Because I get it, they're fun, and kids shouldn't have to miss out because they don't have a sibling. This is really circular but mostly I'm pregnant and tired and sick of chasing children around the store. ::harumph::
Yeah, guilty. Sorry about that. It's not about fun, it's about it being the only way to get her not to climb back and forth between the seat and basket or (worse) to throw herself out of the cart altogether. Those restraints are a joke.
So frustrated that they only have them at Home Depot around here; I can only fit so much on the rack under the basket and having to choose between her poking tiny holes in the plastic wrap around the raw meat or licking the produce would be a dream.
Along with the clothes with the gender specific wording, I hate pretty much all clothes with words on them. And I despise character clothing! My kids, of course, love Anna and Elsa, and Cars, and PJ Masks, etc, but I refuse to dress them in any character clothes to leave the house! I've gotten to the point where I will allow them to wear character items for pj's, but never to go anywhere!
My UO, I think may have been mentioned a bit but I've not been very good at following all the posts, is I look forward to switching over to FB. Of course, I'm not gonna nag ya'll to do that, like, tomorrow, but I like that it's more personal and I "know" who I'm talking to, and can follow posts more easily. I understand why we usually wait till we are further along, and try to weed out any crazies first, but I do look forward to when we get to that point!
Speaking of shopping carts.... I have no respect for people who do not bring the shopping cart back to the little corral. There is LITERALLY no reasoning that is ok with me for anyone to do this. STOP BEING LAZY.
@Jens_Hoes I passive-aggressively tell my son that we always bring the cart back when we’re done with it every time we go shopping. He’s 15 months.
Also I am a single-child parent who has just discovered the miracle that those car carts are. I do feel bad using them for one kid, but slightly guilty is better than yelling at my kid for trying to stand in the basket. Sigh.
Me: 31 | DH: 31
Together since 2003 | Married 2010 TTC #1 January 2016 BFP April 18 2016 | EDD December 29, 2016 Welcome baby A! January 9, 2017
TTC#2 March 2018 BFP March 30, 2018 | EDD December 12, 2018
Along with the clothes with the gender specific wording, I hate pretty much all clothes with words on them. And I despise character clothing! My kids, of course, love Anna and Elsa, and Cars, and PJ Masks, etc, ... I look forward to switching over to FB.
+1 on both counts!
I'm going to discourage character clothing because kids are kids, they can be consumerist adults later. Also I look forward to the FB switch whenever that happens too
NTNP since Dec 2012 | TTC since Jan 2016 Dx: Unspecified IF BFP#1 Nov 2017 • Blighted Ovum + MMC • D&C at nine weeks BFP#2 Apr 2018 • It's a boy! • Born 13 Dec 2018
I LOVE all the UO's here, ladies. I'm the first to admit, I'm not a big believer in any sort of "woo" myself, although I do like essential oils for some stuff, mainly because they smell so nice! And you best believe I'll be getting an epidural with this new little bundle. Also, my daughter watches YT of Sesame Street on my phone or her tablet sometimes. I can't commit to the "no screens" stuff because I like my sanity.
I thought I would try and avoid character clothing, then I made a special Maui shirt for my son for his 2nd birthday. Plus all the grandparents buy him character clothes, so whatever. I'm not that against it. We still have tons of other clothes! I loved all his sweaters and cardigans this winter! He looked like a little man!
ETA +1 for can't wait till we're far enough along for Facebook!
I use the car carts and I only have one kid BUT I have a self-imposed rule that I only will use it if there’s more than one available.
Me: 35 H: 35 Married: 4/5/13 "You know that place between sleep and awake, that place where you can still remember dreaming? That's where I will always love you. That's where I'll be waiting." ~Peter Pan
*TW*
BFP #1: 11/12/12 EDD 7/25/13 Baby boy: 7/27/13 BFP #2: 10/29/17 MMC dx @ 9 weeks BFP #3: 2/2/18 MC 2/7/18 BFP #4: 3/2/18 MC 3/9/18 RPL testing and hysteroscopy: all normal BFP #5: 4/1/18 MMC dx @ 14 weeks ----> genetically normal girl Hysteroscopy to remove scar tissue 9/28 BFP #6 11/5/18 EDD 7/20/19 Rainbow baby girl born 7/23/19 BFP #7 12/8/2021 EDD 8/22/2022
This is probably not a UO around here but pee sticks should never be included in a social media pregnancy announcement. No one needs to see that.
Me: 35 H: 35 Married: 4/5/13 "You know that place between sleep and awake, that place where you can still remember dreaming? That's where I will always love you. That's where I'll be waiting." ~Peter Pan
*TW*
BFP #1: 11/12/12 EDD 7/25/13 Baby boy: 7/27/13 BFP #2: 10/29/17 MMC dx @ 9 weeks BFP #3: 2/2/18 MC 2/7/18 BFP #4: 3/2/18 MC 3/9/18 RPL testing and hysteroscopy: all normal BFP #5: 4/1/18 MMC dx @ 14 weeks ----> genetically normal girl Hysteroscopy to remove scar tissue 9/28 BFP #6 11/5/18 EDD 7/20/19 Rainbow baby girl born 7/23/19 BFP #7 12/8/2021 EDD 8/22/2022
@CecilB93 that's part of the reason I hate it!! They have SO many other cute clothes, I'm not gonna waste a chance to show of their adorableness in adorable outfits, so they can wear a Bubble Guppies shirt. Wear that ish to bed. And their grandparents know my stance, so they know if they purchase character stuff, they will be used as pjs. Also, I ADORE my boys in "men" clothes!! I need to find a pic to share of both of my boys looking all dapper like little men!
I'm the same; I don't care purchase character clothing. Now, my DD does have a super cute Moana dress that she wears often and a lot of Elmo PJ's (she's obsessed), but I don't personally buy her character stuff myself.
This is probably not a UO around here but pee sticks should never be included in a social media pregnancy announcement. No one needs to see that.
Seriously. When I was peeing on LH strips I felt ashamed showing the line progression photo to my OB. Of course he didn't care, I'm sure they see a lot of pee sticks. Note to self, avoid working in a women's clinic.
NTNP since Dec 2012 | TTC since Jan 2016 Dx: Unspecified IF BFP#1 Nov 2017 • Blighted Ovum + MMC • D&C at nine weeks BFP#2 Apr 2018 • It's a boy! • Born 13 Dec 2018
@antsangel1118 yes! I love the outfits that make him look grown up! This is one of my favorite pictures of DS, from this past winter. I don't think I have pics of him in his cardigans, but they're so cute on toddlers!
@CecilB93 he's so cute!! Yes, I love all the little sweaters and cardigans, and suits! Here's my Micah about a month before we lost him, and my 5 year old, Briana, and 3 year old, Gabriel on Easter.
Add me to the list of people that despise clothes with words and characters. Especially sayings like “princesses in training” or “daddy’s boss” or whatever. I mean, I ask her everyday what she wants to wear and she still doesn’t care at this point. If she were to choose the clothes I don’t like, I’d obviously let her wear them...unless it’s to church.
We do do have a lot of sports shirts and jerseys and band shirts (Beatles, Foo Fighters, Nirvana and AC/DC) and she gets mistaken for a boy quite often, but I don’t care. I’m not dressing her in pink, frilly shit every day for other people’s benefit!
@clbness we dressed DD in pink with bows and still got asked if she was a boy...put them in whatever you want. People are weird and are going to ask regardless.
Re: UO 5/3/18
*Rainbow 8/2015*
*Expected Rainbows 12/2018*
*Loss of Twin 5/2018*
My UO I'm not a fan of "baby burritos". Yes I will swaddle my child if that's what comforts him/her, but do not call him/her a burrito, you don't get to eat my child.
And FFC, I'm sad I never got a maternity shoot when I was pregnant with DS. We just couldn't afford it. We've got a friend who enjoys photography and does it more as a hobby, so I may see if she'll take some pics later on this time! I think the ones with the older sibling are cute. Since our LO this time will be born late Nov/early Dec (depending on when they decide to induce) I'm gonna see if she'll do some photos of new baby and current DS for our Christmas card.
DS2 due 12/12/18
*Rainbow 8/2015*
*Expected Rainbows 12/2018*
*Loss of Twin 5/2018*
*Rainbow 8/2015*
*Expected Rainbows 12/2018*
*Loss of Twin 5/2018*
Heres the fabric, not a wrap or blanket obviously.
DS2 due 12/12/18
And we definitely shopped around the boy's department for some of DD's clothes, and DS wears her old clothes if he likes them. I think his favorite piece is one of her pink nightgowns, actually.
But even at 3, being exposed to all the pink and princesses and bows, my boy still loves blue the best and trucks and dinosaurs and ninja turtles. And my DD, bless her heart, loves pink and purple the best and love dancing and fairies and wants to grow up to be a mommy (which, as it turns out, means leaving your DH at home with the kids to go to your fun job, so it's not as bad as it sounds, but still).
So honestly, I'm going to enjoy dressing this kid in whatever the hell I want to while I can, because it doesn't seem to matter one iota what they end up liking and they'll have strong opinions about it way sooner than I'd like.
*Rainbow 8/2015*
*Expected Rainbows 12/2018*
*Loss of Twin 5/2018*
DS2 due 12/12/18
*Rainbow 8/2015*
*Expected Rainbows 12/2018*
*Loss of Twin 5/2018*
Also, any store that has the cars at the bottom of the cart? You suck. My kid can climb out and run away. He can't do that if he's up high.
DS2 due 12/12/18
Also, another UO - go overboard buying clothes the first year! Everyone says not to, since they're just babies and they don't "need" a huge/cute wardrobe since they're going to be sleeping and spitting up all the time (and, of course, they don't) BUT if your kiddos are anything like mine, they will be very stubbornly picking out their own clothes from like, 1 on and you'll never get to buy them anything adorable again. My DD is VERY particular about her "look" and it is hilarious and I love her style, but also I miss picking out stuff for her!
Although this was taken closer to 3 months — we had new-newborn pics scheduled but then he spent 3 weeks in the NICU and I wanted to get all the oxygen paraphernalia out of the house before we brought the photographer in.
This time around I don’t think I’ll hire anyone. I got a really nice DSLR for Christmas and feel fairly confident that I can capture all the sweet stuff myself.
TTC #1 January 2016
BFP April 18 2016 | EDD December 29, 2016
Welcome baby A! January 9, 2017
TTC#2 March 2018
BFP March 30, 2018 | EDD December 12, 2018
@tumbleweed-1 Some folks have no gas pump courtesy! I get extra miffed when people leave their cars at the pump and go inside after filling the tank. C’mon people! It’s not a parking space! They need lessons on courtesy and compassion towards others.
Dx: Unspecified IF
BFP#1 Nov 2017 • Blighted Ovum + MMC • D&C at nine weeks
BFP#2 Apr 2018 • It's a boy! • Born 13 Dec 2018
So frustrated that they only have them at Home Depot around here; I can only fit so much on the rack under the basket and having to choose between her poking tiny holes in the plastic wrap around the raw meat or licking the produce would be a dream.
My UO, I think may have been mentioned a bit but I've not been very good at following all the posts, is I look forward to switching over to FB. Of course, I'm not gonna nag ya'll to do that, like, tomorrow, but I like that it's more personal and I "know" who I'm talking to, and can follow posts more easily. I understand why we usually wait till we are further along, and try to weed out any crazies first, but I do look forward to when we get to that point!
Also I am a single-child parent who has just discovered the miracle that those car carts are. I do feel bad using them for one kid, but slightly guilty is better than yelling at my kid for trying to stand in the basket. Sigh.
TTC #1 January 2016
BFP April 18 2016 | EDD December 29, 2016
Welcome baby A! January 9, 2017
TTC#2 March 2018
BFP March 30, 2018 | EDD December 12, 2018
I'm going to discourage character clothing because kids are kids, they can be consumerist adults later.
Also I look forward to the FB switch whenever that happens too
Dx: Unspecified IF
BFP#1 Nov 2017 • Blighted Ovum + MMC • D&C at nine weeks
BFP#2 Apr 2018 • It's a boy! • Born 13 Dec 2018
ETA +1 for can't wait till we're far enough along for Facebook!
DS2 due 12/12/18
Married: 4/5/13
"You know that place between sleep and awake,
that place where you can still remember dreaming?
That's where I will always love you.
That's where I'll be waiting."
~Peter Pan
*TW*
BFP #2: 10/29/17 MMC dx @ 9 weeks
BFP #3: 2/2/18 MC 2/7/18
BFP #4: 3/2/18 MC 3/9/18
RPL testing and hysteroscopy: all normal
BFP #5: 4/1/18 MMC dx @ 14 weeks ----> genetically normal girl
Hysteroscopy to remove scar tissue 9/28
BFP #6 11/5/18 EDD 7/20/19
BFP #7 12/8/2021 EDD 8/22/2022
Married: 4/5/13
"You know that place between sleep and awake,
that place where you can still remember dreaming?
That's where I will always love you.
That's where I'll be waiting."
~Peter Pan
*TW*
BFP #2: 10/29/17 MMC dx @ 9 weeks
BFP #3: 2/2/18 MC 2/7/18
BFP #4: 3/2/18 MC 3/9/18
RPL testing and hysteroscopy: all normal
BFP #5: 4/1/18 MMC dx @ 14 weeks ----> genetically normal girl
Hysteroscopy to remove scar tissue 9/28
BFP #6 11/5/18 EDD 7/20/19
BFP #7 12/8/2021 EDD 8/22/2022
Dx: Unspecified IF
BFP#1 Nov 2017 • Blighted Ovum + MMC • D&C at nine weeks
BFP#2 Apr 2018 • It's a boy! • Born 13 Dec 2018
DS2 due 12/12/18
DS2 due 12/12/18
Add me to the list of people that despise clothes with words and characters. Especially sayings like “princesses in training” or “daddy’s boss” or whatever. I mean, I ask her everyday what she wants to wear and she still doesn’t care at this point. If she were to choose the clothes I don’t like, I’d obviously let her wear them...unless it’s to church.
We do do have a lot of sports shirts and jerseys and band shirts (Beatles, Foo Fighters, Nirvana and AC/DC) and she gets mistaken for a boy quite often, but I don’t care. I’m not dressing her in pink, frilly shit every day for other people’s benefit!