PAIF Graduates - New Mommies - April 2018

PoeMasque · April 2018

@nmtay congrats and yay for producing enough milk for two babes! I would definitely see an IBCLC (licensed lactation consultant) and have them do a weighed feed so that you know how much they are transferring from breast to stomach. It’s possible your good supply fills them up quickly (babies get milk out way faster than the pump), or they might have tongue ties that make bottle feeds easy and breast hard. It’s also important to do paced feeding when using a bottle with babies who will also be at the breast (just search YouTube for paced feed). Baby should be in a seated/upright position and the nipple should only be half full of milk so that baby has to “work for it” instead of it just flowing on it’s own into baby’s mouth.

Also - breastfeeding is HARD!! I’ve supplemented with formula many times just to have a break from painful feeds and pumping in those early days. I know they tell you not to do that because it can ruin supply, but once in a while a skipped feed/mental break won’t hurt.

wabash15 · April 2018

@nmtay I was able to get my twins to nurse. We had to supplement a lot initially and my DD did not transfer from me till almost 8 weeks. It took a lot of visits with the LC and hard work but we got there. It is possible so hang in there. 1+ to slow flow nipples. Good luck and the twins are beautiful!

nmtay · April 2018

Thanks everyone for the love and breastfeeding advice! Haven't managed to talk to a lactation consultant yet, but it's definitely a great point that they can help with pumping as well! Makes it seem more worth it in case breastfeeding really doesn't end up working well. right now I'm mostly nursing to top them up if they're still hungry after the bottle, but it would be super nice to not have to pump as much! Although that's at least going better now that feedings aren't a constant 3 hours apart!

mbradfo2 · April 2018

How often are you feeding? Our 4 week old is still doing every three hours and she's formula fed. She won't go longer than 3 hours without a meal in general, except during her sleepy part of the day (afternoon). Our doctor told us to feed every 3 hours, not more than 4 hours apart. Maybe because she's a preemie? Her weight has always been great though and she's definitely thriving...our doctor didn't even think we needed to use the special preemie formula with extra calories.

I'm hoping to get her to 4-5 hour feedings by 8 weeks so we can get some solid sleep when we both attempt to get back to work. I work from home, but I still need to be awake and alert!

mbradfo2 · April 2018

And anyone else with a noisy sleeper? Whenever she's in lighter sleep, she has this lovely symphony of baby noises she makes. hehe I think it might be my fault though since my husband says I'm noisy when I sleep too...Sorry if my thoughts seem so disjointed! I only got about 45 min of sleep last night!!

persnickity · April 2018

@mbradfo2 my daughter is an extremely noisy sleeper. She's slept in her crib in her nursery since day 1 and we can hear her across the hall in our bedroom. She's getting quieter as she gets older.

MMD1986 · April 2018

@mbradfo2 we are still at every 3 hours. Brooks made 2 months yesterday (adjusted age 3 weeks). The doctor says we can go up to 4 hours overnight but feed every 3 during the day. They need the feedings that frequent when they are so young.

mbradfo2 · April 2018

@persnickity something to look forward to then...quieter sleeping! She's sleeping in a bassinet in our room and while I can sleep through her nighttime noises, my husband struggles and sometimes has to go into his office to get some shuteye. At the very least, we're planning on transitioning to the crib in the nursery around 6 months.

@MMD1986
Oddly enough, our Anne seems to end up eating alot more at night -- she sleeps much more deeply during the day and while she still eats enough and wakes up for food in daylight hours, she isn't as ravenous as she is when she's wide-awake at night. My doctor says that day/night confusion is normal in newborns and should go away so hopefully we'll end up getting up to 4 hours at night...

stella_700 · April 2018

@mbradfo2
Our (34wk) twins were really loud sleepers, both of us struggled to adjust to their noises, especially when they first came home from the hospital (20 day stay in the NICU). We put a white noise maker right under their twin joovy pnp bassinet, and it helped me out. DH did end up in the guest room/the couch for several nights. We finally just gave in and transitioned them to their cribs over spring break at four months or so. The transition was much less painful than I thought it would be.

PoeMasque · April 2018

@mbradfo2 @stella_700 we also transitioned to crib at 4 mos due to my not being able to sleep well with baby in the room (plus he would wake up, look over, see me, start crying). He still has nights where he’s up every 2 hours, but more often than not he’s only up twice for feeds. The big thing for us was getting him to go down drowsy and stop fighting sleep. It only took two nights to get there. Naps are another story though

persnickity · April 2018

@PoeMasque Mackenzie doesn't really nap much during the week. 2-3 30 minute naps are it. And it took until around 7 months for her to have an hour or so long nap on weekends. Don't worry too much if he doesn't nap, as long as he's getting enough sleep overall.

stella_700 · April 2018

@PoeMasque The twins are not yet regular nappers. They like to cat nap 3-4 times a day for an hour or 45 minutes, not concurrently of course. I dream sometimes of nice long 2-3 hour naps at the same time! We are doing pretty good of putting babies down when they are drowsy rather than already asleep and so far they are only getting up once around two in the morning for their night times feeds after finishing their evening bottles around 7:30 or 8. How much are your little ones taking for each feed at this point? Mine seem to be growing well but I feel like they aren't getting the recommended number of ounces per day according to the pediatrician.

latershrader · April 2018

Mama's w/ older babies: What are you doing about screens? Eli is OBSESSED with the "light box" as we call it. DH is addicted to screens so it's hard to keep them put away. And when we have the TV on he does watch and react to colorful, animated shows & commercials. And to be honest, when I need 10 minutes to finish dinner I have put on the You Tube baby sensory videos for him (I've done that like 2x, don't judge!). But what is your plan for screen-time for your little one?

mbradfo2 · April 2018

@latershrader
My baby's still a newborn and I've been thinking about screentime since I got pregnant! My husband is a tech guy and always has some screen gadget or whatnot around, but the pediatricians all say 'no screentime before age 2'...I don't see how you can avoid it in this day and age. Certainly, there must be some way to integrate the old fashioned screentime approach into a modern world that is built around screen-based devices? I mean, obviously, we don't want to use screens as a babysitter or a substitute for real experiences, books, toys. According to the screentime philosophy, if I carry my baby into my husband's office when he's streaming on twitch and sit to talk with him while he's continuing to watch/play, that is considered 'screentime' for baby.

stella_700 · April 2018

With both my husband and I being gamers, we probably won't fight that battle too much. So far the best thing that they like is sports. Our little boy watches soccer with rapt attention. Lots of bright colors on that bright green background, baby girl loves hockey, again bright colors on white background. We haven't really used either yet to distract babies while doing other things. It will happen, just not yet. What is more important to me than preventing all screen time, is that they have time with other babies and develop the appropriate, necessary social skills for their age. I feel like the fear/avoidance of screen time is driven by parental concerns that their children will grow up unable to relate to other people, both adults and children their age and that they will be unable to focus solely on one task to completion. Honestly having our babies grow up with that technology is only going to help them connect better with our connected society. So long as we give equal push on face to face interaction I'd think they would be fine. Both DH and I are/can be socially awkward due to shyness/upbringing, I'd love to avoid that for our babies.

Our plan SO FAR includes at least these as they get older:
1. We are going to institute sit down dinner with no books/screens.

2. At least one family outing/playtime per weekend with all of us for 2 hours or so.

nmtay · April 2018

@mbradfo2 our twins are just over 2 weeks and at the 2 week checkup they were 4 and 7 oz over birth weight. Our pediatrician basically says that once they're back at birth weight and gaining well to let them sleep as long as they will (and he usually sees it being fine at 2 weeks). Our twins were born at 37+3 so definitely early but not preemie, so I can see you needing to still wake your babe up to feed if she won't wake up herself. Our babies typically go 3-4 hours with 2 stretches of being up for 2 hours and feeding at the beginning and end, once around noon and once around 10 pm. They haven't slept longer than 4h 15 min straight yet, but we usually get 2 4h and 1 3h stretch at night. And I just try to stay in bed and asleep for as much of those nearly 12 hours as possible lol

Also my babies aren't old enough for screen time to really be an issue but I'm definitely interested to see what all you guys say!

persnickity · April 2018

Mackenzie is 8 months and we have very limited screen time. TV wise, we don't really watch anything when she's awake (goes to bed by 6-6:30pm) during the week. It was mainly her napping through football season on weekends. Once the weather is nice, we don't watch a lot of TV. Phones or tablets are another story. DH reads the paper on his tablet, so she sees it and tries to grab it. We also log everything in the baby app, so she grabs for it when she sees it. Otherwise, we try to minimize phone usage.

JWatt5 · April 2018

@latershrader - we have screen time happen. I don’t really fight it. I’m a Stay at Home mom at the moment and like tv in the background sometimes. Mornings he sits on my bed and I have the news on, he just plays with his toys, looks up at commercials & I have my coffee (we now share breakfast lol). Around 8-9am, before nap we go and play on the floor in his nursery for a while, read books. In the evening kinda the same things, he just looks when he hears something he likes. During the day we try to get out of the house so not much oppertunity there. Tuesday’s and Thursday’s I have workout classes with moms he comes to. But my nephew loves the movie Moana so if he’s watching it when I visit I let Parker. He seems to love the music. We did download that on the iPad for the flight on our trip. He watched it a bit. We’ve put on Little Baby Bums before and sing the songs with him. Again, loved the music and colours. I don’t like he to glue to the TV, if that happens we’ll back it off but I don’t think he gets so much that I’m going to worry I’m “ruining” him. He laughs at things now, seems to understand - I don’t know how that’s not good for his development.

byrneme · April 2018

Zoey LOVES my iPhone but I think it's more the 'light up' of it because when the screen is black she's just kind of 'eh'. She also loves the case which is silver sparkles. She loved sports on TV when she was really little - all the movement! Do I think I'm 'breaking the screentime rules'? Probably by the letter of the law, yes. But by intention? No. Those guidelines are meant in a bit of a different way and, to previous post's point, probably a bit outdated in the way things are now. Even if those guidelines were created 5-10 years ago it's changed. We watch a baby sign language DVD on weekends which is 100% educational but would technically violate the rules. I think we will just have to monitor and not use it as a crutch (I say this now but ask me again when I have a 2 year old throwing a fit in a restaurant lol). I started to read Bringing Up Bebe (basically about French parenting and how it differs from American and how some things they do can be REALLY beneficial) at the end of my pregnancy and got good tips in there on certain things that I used when she was a newborn (like don't immediately pick up a crying baby, give a small wait time to learn to self-soothe)- I know this is addressed. I stopped reading it because the tips seemed so far away but it's probably a good idea to pick it back up!

Polythene Pam · April 2018

Re screen time, my 4 year old is in the minority for not having an iPad... up until graham was born, she had one 30 min show before bed. I honestly wasn’t even against it, she just becomes a terror to turn it off or stop playing on the iPad! Now that she stopped napping she gets a long show midday to “rest” and one before bed.. about 1.5-2 hrs of tv a day. She’s super active, we live outside, she truly enjoys it as a way to wind down, esp after school, so I’m ok with that much.

As a result graham has the same but I’ll just play with him on the floor during the shows. My daughter learned so much from Sesame Street and Daniel tiger so I’m all for shows like that when he’s a little bigger.

mbradfo2 · April 2018

I think the most important thing about screentime is making sure it's controlled/supervised and engaging! I agree that it's likely unrealistic to do zero screentime under 2 in this day and age. As long as parents are involved and aware, I think there can be positive things coming from screentime (vocabulary development, thinking skills if playing puzzle games, etc).

@stella_700
My husband and I are also gamers so we tend to be of the same mindset. One thing I have been thinking about is at what age do I separate myself from baby when I'm playing a game that is too mature for her? Right now, I will let her sleep on my lap on her boppy pillow when I'm playing something, but I know that can't go on forever!

Ladies, those of you who did a baby photoshoot, what age do you recommend? We had some nice pictures taken at the hospital but I want to do a more professional session. I was thinking when she can sit up on her own?

latershrader · April 2018

Thank you all for your info on screen time. I'm not against screens but since this is my first kiddo I am trying to figure out limits and schedules.

@mbradfo2 We did a family session at 3 months. I'm kind of glad we waited until then because he was visibly smiling at us and interacting with us by then. But any photos will be treasured, no matter what age!

Polythene Pam · April 2018

@mbradfo2 we did newborn (10 days old), and I’m doing 6 month and 1 year. My closest friend is a photographer though so I get a deal. Any age is great honestly! (I dabble in photography too). Before 1 month they’re so sleepy and those are great photos, 3ish months when they’re smiley and can do great tummy photos, 6ish months when they’re sitting, and 1 year when they’re walking (with parents help maybe, also cute photos!) Graham can’t sit up yet but him and my daughter are OBSESSED with each other so we want to capture that before he takes off crawling and we can’t get him to stay still

MMD1986 · April 2018

We did a newborn shoot when Brooks was 3 weeks. We also bought ourselves a nice camera for Christmas and plan to do our own photo shoots every now and then. They are expensive so not something I can afford multiple times per year.

Today was my first day back at work after 9 weeks maternity leave. Ugh, that was not fun. For those who pump at work, what do y'all do with your pump parts during the day? Wash after each use? Put them in the fridge? Today I just left the parts assembled in a clean Tupperware in a mini fridge I know is clean. I also bought some Medela sanitizing spray but it hasn't come in yet.

Just wondering what y'all do?

persnickity · April 2018

@MMD1986 I use a small bowl of hot soapy water, swish everything around in that, then rinse and set on a drying rack. I use paper towels to dry if the parts are wet when I pump again. I store the milk in a lunch box in the fridge.

I have two sets, so every night I wash one set in the dishwasher and use the other the next day.

omarismyhomeboy · April 2018

@nmtay my goodness congrats on those beautiful babies! We had feeding difficulties, and I only had 1 baby so I can't imagine 2! You are doing an amazing job!

@latershrader ha, screen time is a big issue in our house! my husband is pretty militant about no screens. He really feels like having a lot of screen time when he was a kid hindered his interest in reading and hurt his focus in a lot of activities. I have no idea how true that is, but we do our best to keep her away from screens. Babies LOVE them, though, and its impossible to 100% avoid screens of all kinds, but we certainly don't allow her to watch TV more than a few minutes or play with phones for a while. She has some light-up toys and I try to satisfy her with those hahaha. Honestly I think it just becomes a problem when parents use them as a 'babysitting' tool for hours at a time. I can see that hindering some development.

stella_700 · April 2018

@MMD1986 I'm pumping at work, I'm lucking enough to have been gifted with a second pump. I keep one at work through the week and one at home. I keep my parts in the fridge between pumps at the house, thoroughly washing and sterilizing them once a day. At work our lactation room is set up with a sink and microwave so we wash and or sterilize. I know medela make the reusable sterilizer bags for parts. Maybe that could be a solution? I just wash mine between each usage at work but I'm only pumping twice at work once at noon and again between 3:30-4:30, takes me longer but work has been generous in their time for pumping.

@mbradfo2 I'm going to be pretty cautious with separating scary/age inappropriate gaming from the babies. I know that my nephew had terrible, terrible night terrors. He'd wake up screaming and screaming and it took my sister half an hour to get him calm and another half an hour to get back to sleep. Night terrors can begin as early as a year but definitely by 18 months. I've also read that boys tend to suffer more than girls.

MMD1986 · April 2018

@stella_700 good to know someone else just leaves their parts in the fridge some between uses. I did that again today, and I think I'll stick with that. Work has been great with allowing me to pump 3 times per day, we just don't have a lactation room. I'm using the storage room, which is fine, I just don't want to have to haul the pieces to the kitchen to wash/dry each use because we share the kitchen with other offices. I wash and dry really well at the house all evening and over night after each use so I guess that will be good enough. I bought this awesome new pump that is usb rechargeable and hands free (I got sooo sick of being tied to the wall for 2 hours a day pumping), but the only downside is you can't steam sterilize in the microwave.

persnickity · April 2018

@MMD1986 i started out keeping them in the fridge, but didn't like putting cold flanges on my boobs, so i wash instead. Haha

stella_700 · April 2018

I broke down and bought bravada pumping bras, I bought two and I'm praying that they fit properly and give a little more support to the "girls". The ones I bought at the hospital have gotten some seriously heavy use and seem be be getting pretty stretched out of shape, especially where I insert the flanges. Any well-endowed ladies have luck with these?

@persnickity I didn't enjoy the cold flanges either especially over the winter months but I feel like there is never enough time in the day right now. Even that extra 5-10 minutes of not washing and drying them six times as day helps. My babies are so good but with two of them and a full time job I need a cleaning and laundry fairy! I asked my husband how we got one of those the other day in semi-jest, he told me we needed to win the lottery.

So my twins are seriously working on those first teeth right now and they are developing an issue. Their poor hands! They are always in their mouths and are beginning to look chapped and red. I'm trying much harder with teethers but neither of them have enough dexterity right now to put it successfully in their mouth. Has anyone had luck with those teethers that fit over the baby's hands? I'm considering buying one to try, not sure if it will just make them mad and be a waste so looking for success with something similar.

persnickity · April 2018

@stella_700 with one, I have zero time for cleaning and can't begin to imagine trying to handle two. Mom's of twins are amazing! I've gotten more efficient with pumping, so i pump 3x a day at work for 30 minutes each time (time I leave my desk to time I get back with pumping, b waking, drying). But I don't take time for lunch at work right now either.

For pumping bras, i wear my normal nursing bras and then have a hands free one that ties on. I put the flanges through, put it on, then push on the rest of the piece. I can look up my Amazon purchase of you're interested

PAIF Graduates - New Mommies - April 2018

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