Diaper bags: I love the JuJuBe BFF! It can be a backpack or you can carry it messenger style. I take my kids to Disneyland a lot and I’m able to babywear with it so I go without the stroller a lot. The straps are very comfortable as well. It also has a lot of room so you can put your important stuff in there (wallet, phone, meds, whatever) so I don’t carry a purse when I have it. It works well for us!
I did extra clothes in the car always and a couple diapers and wipes in my regular purse. DH was responsible for the “diaper bag” (Jansport backpack) if we ever went somewhere for more than a few hours.
Here’s something I thought of while posting in the diaper bag thread: while baby is still messy (blowouts, spitting up, etc) it’s worthwhile to have an extra shirt on hand while you’re out for yourself.
Second what @Lisa3379 said about clothes for you. In the car we have a change of clothes for DD (just an extra set of pjs to make it easy) and for me an old tank top with leggings that rolls up so it takes up little room. Also, I have a gallon ziploc with the clothes in case something does get dirty there is a place to put it until we get home. oh! And a roll of doggy bags in the car for those back seat/back of car diaper changes. Especially helpful with messy diapers so you don’t risk getting poo all over the car.
Be prepared that especially in the first few weeks evenings/nights are going to be the worst. You’re going to dread them. I would be fine all day and as the end of the day appproached the anxiety would ramp up and the baby blues would kick in. I remember so many ladies in my Jan16 BMB going through the same thing. Just remember that it’s temporary. The baby will adjust, your hormones will settle, and everything will fall into place. And if it doesn’t pass don’t tough it out, go to a doctor or therapist.
Also be ready for night sweats. The first night in the hospital I woke up completely soaked in sweat and then was immediately freezing.
Be prepared that especially in the first few weeks evenings/nights are going to be the worst. You’re going to dread them. I would be fine all day and as the end of the day appproached the anxiety would ramp up and the baby blues would kick in. I remember so many ladies in my Jan16 BMB going through the same thing. Just remember that it’s temporary. The baby will adjust, your hormones will settle, and everything will fall into place. And if it doesn’t pass don’t tough it out, go to a doctor or therapist.
Also be ready for night sweats. The first night in the hospital I woke up completely soaked in sweat and then was immediately freezing.
My God, truer words have never been spoken. I remember watching the clock that first month, dreading the night time. Thankfully for us it really was only about a month of pure hell but it was absolutely awful. And the sweating!!!!!!! But I was really swollen and I think that had a lot to do with my month of soaked pillows.
Ahh witching hour. Like clockwork 6:00 hit and there was nothing you could do to calm that baby but keep him attached to the boob for two hours. So I just planned to be stuck on the couch during the time each night. I’d have snacks and water ready to go. He’d eat/sleep repeate and I’d watch tv. Once we accepted that’s how evenings were going to go it saved a lot of stress of trying to “fix it”.
If the hospital lets you (mine did) take everything in the drawers that hold the baby gear. The nurse told me the day before we got to leave that we could take the diapers, wipes, formula and a few other items. I even asked her if she would bring us some more and she said sure. We had enough diapers to last us two weeks without having to make an emergency run to the store especially since my DD was small and needed preemie size diapers, which I did not have on hand.
I think the only other piece of advice and I think someone else mentioned to sign up for the hospital classes. I thought the hospital tour was the best thing to do. They showed us where we would need to go when we came to deliver, what the rooms were like, and what each room had in it. For my hospital and I have no idea if each hospital is this way, but they had different rooms for the actual delivery and the room you stayed in after delivery. I delivered early and it was nice to know where we needed to go when we got there. Also, they gave us the hospital rules and guidelines, I did not know about the new rule hospitals were adopting that the baby will stay with you in the room most of the time and not in a nursery. Or the fact that they do not allow babies or young kids unless they're your own into that ward.
+1 for the hospital tour. I didn't think the other classes were amazing, but good. But the Tour was SO helpful. Knowing where to go, the process they follow, what they look for you admit or deny you, what pain options they offer, etc,. Amazing!
I don't even think it's just the nights that are that bad... the truth is the first few weeks just suck. Pp hormones are a bitch! No joke. No control of yourself or your emotions - it does get better! Its ok to be irrational and freak out/cry/whatever. I think the nights are just quieter and your brain gets louder, hence they're harder. But quiet times during the day can be tough as well.
And your baby really does love you! You are not only there to feed it! They are so attuned to you, your scent (which by the way you'll reek!) Your voice, everything. They want you! Not just the bottle/boob. It takes a while to figure that out thanks to pp hormones, but YOU are important to your baby.
My the nurses at my hospital encouraged me to take all the baby gear. They said anything we don't take has to be thrown away before the next mom in assigned to the room.
I'm hoping this hasn't been asked or discussed yet and if it has maybe someone can point me in to the right thread?
Are there any STM's who live in another state from their parents/family? Did you have family stay with you? Who stayed and how long?!
I know some parents may want their alone time but my husband will likely only take a few days off and then head back to work shortly. I live in CA and my family are all in Colorado so I actually want my mom and dad to stay with me for a couple weeks.
@belo290 my in-laws stayed with us for about a week, went home, and then stayed 2 more weeks at Christmas when DS was born. For a couple weeks before the birth, I was worried that it would just be too much, but it was fabulous. Not that anyone could really spare me from nursing him every 2-3 hours, but having a few people around to make food, pick stuff up at the store, watch the baby so I could nap for a bit... so worth it.
@belo290 with my 1st, I was over two hours away from my family. We had my mom stay with us for a couple of days, which was nice. She cooked my favorite foods and cleaned my house. It was really nice to have that. We initially didn’t want anyone to be at our house and it turned out to be such a great help. I would have gone crazy if she stayed longer, but the few days were nice.
@belo290 I was the opposite. I have local family and have family come in from out of town and I just wanted them all gone. Yeah, it was nice they’d bring by food, but they’d stay and want to hold the baby and chit chat. I just wanted to eat my food and sleep. Then I’d have practically beg for my baby back to feed him. They’d finally leave and DS would be awake and I’d missed my window for a nap. I’m sure it all depends on how your family is though.
Re: Advice for First Time Moms (April)
oh! And a roll of doggy bags in the car for those back seat/back of car diaper changes. Especially helpful with messy diapers so you don’t risk getting poo all over the car.
Also be ready for night sweats. The first night in the hospital I woke up completely soaked in sweat and then was immediately freezing.
Married: 12/16/12
TTC #1: 06/15 BFP #1:07/13/15
D&C: 08/28/15
BFP #2: 09/26/15
M: 06/03/16
BFP #2: 02/12/18
L : 7/26/18 (SIUGR, micropreemie)
I think the only other piece of advice and I think someone else mentioned to sign up for the hospital classes. I thought the hospital tour was the best thing to do. They showed us where we would need to go when we came to deliver, what the rooms were like, and what each room had in it. For my hospital and I have no idea if each hospital is this way, but they had different rooms for the actual delivery and the room you stayed in after delivery. I delivered early and it was nice to know where we needed to go when we got there. Also, they gave us the hospital rules and guidelines, I did not know about the new rule hospitals were adopting that the baby will stay with you in the room most of the time and not in a nursery. Or the fact that they do not allow babies or young kids unless they're your own into that ward.
I don't even think it's just the nights that are that bad... the truth is the first few weeks just suck. Pp hormones are a bitch! No joke. No control of yourself or your emotions - it does get better! Its ok to be irrational and freak out/cry/whatever. I think the nights are just quieter and your brain gets louder, hence they're harder. But quiet times during the day can be tough as well.
And your baby really does love you! You are not only there to feed it! They are so attuned to you, your scent (which by the way you'll reek!) Your voice, everything. They want you! Not just the bottle/boob. It takes a while to figure that out thanks to pp hormones, but YOU are important to your baby.
Are there any STM's who live in another state from their parents/family? Did you have family stay with you? Who stayed and how long?!
I know some parents may want their alone time but my husband will likely only take a few days off and then head back to work shortly. I live in CA and my family are all in Colorado so I actually want my mom and dad to stay with me for a couple weeks.
My Mom and I are talking about the same thing (she is a 6hr drive away). But no idea when I should have her come or how long to have her stay.