@neeraja_k I got called "heartless" over Christmas because I wouldn't let my stepdad's chainsmoking aunt that I don't even know come over and get her gross secondhand smoke all over everything. Or smoke with the back door cracked open. No one knew I was pregnant yet, and I was adamant, and I got my way. But whew, I was treated like shit over that one.
WTF, I am in tears and upset because there was a shooting at a high school here. All I can think about is how excited my daughter was to go to school to celebrate Valentine’s Day. I can’t imagine the way these kids and their parents are feeling. I believe I am so upset because it is close to home. So Sad that school isn’t a safe place.
DD1 is so against bed sharing, that even when she's having a tough night and we get in bed with her to try to settle her down, she won't sleep. She just looks at you until you leave and then she goes to sleep haha. I'm probably missing out on cuddles, but I'd way rather she never insist on sleeping in my bed with me, or that I get in bed with her, so whatever.
My kid just informed me that he's decided to go back to Thailand for university. He's got a full ride scholarship, and I can't blame him, but WTF kid? I'm so sad that I won't be able to see him for possibly YEARS! I'm happy for him, but feeling very sorry for myself.
Me:32 DH:45 DSD: 20 DSS: 18 Team green baby due: Aug 6th, 2018
@Firemanswife11 Mom gets all passive-aggressive at me about her smoking because she knows I don't like it. She will eventually take it outside if we're there for a holiday dinner, but only after lighting it right next to me and puffing at me as she walks by. If we're outside I will step further away from her sphere of smoke swirling around her if we're having a conversation, or go up-wind of her. I get told, "Get over yourself" or "You grew up with it and turned out fine".
Once with the lighting and purposefully puffing at me and I asked her to please stop doing it. I understand it's her house, but if she wants to smoke, please do so outside, that it bothers me and she jumped all over me for being a whiny bitch. My husband gave her the "oh no you didn't" look, immediately packed up our stuff, packed up grandma's stuff, and we all left her there with the food on the table. Needless to say she hasn't really been civil to him since.
And this is honestly a big source of angst for me right now. I want to see her quit smoking for her health, but even after promising my dad on his death bed that she'd quit, she's clearly not going to. And I'm so tired of the drama with everything already that I can just imagine the nuclear fallout when I tell her I'm pregnant and she will not be smoking around my child, like she did with me. But it is what it is. When you're dealing with a selfish, immature mother, I guess I'll just have to be the adult. :P
As for the school shooting, it's awful, but I'm more mad at myself for not really caring anymore. Nothing meaningful changes for the better in the country and more innocent kids keep getting shot. It's just sad all around.
WTF me. Apparently I'm extra sensitive today and should stay off FB. This feels so stupid to even say after the school shooting mentioned above as it is obviously a horrible horrible thing and now this feels so tiny. But my feelings are hurt with all of the "Pinterest mom" hate I've seen on FB today. So many of my mom friends are mom shaming Pinterest moms for making shit for their kid's for valentine's day. I enjoyed hand making my boy's cards and DS1 and I did them together as a project. I don't think there's anything wrong with the fact I handmade them. I know they're going to just get thrown away but for me it's always been the thought that counts and I like putting extra effort into things. I don't shame people who buy the boxed cards because I totally get that too, so why should mom's who put the time and effort into something for their kids get shamed? Kinda sucks.
My WTF is with this country, as @ssthomps brought up.
Yet another school shooting. This makes at least 17 in 2018 alone. What the actual fuck, America. This is literally the only place this is happening. Something needs to change.
April Siggy Challenge: April Showers
About me:
29 y/o Married 6.26.11 BFP 12.23.13, EDD 9.2.14 - baby girl, born too soon at 22w6d due to a placental abruption on 5.5.14 BFP 8.4.14, EDD 4.15.15 - rainbow son, born at 30w4d due to a placental abruption on 2.8.15, healthy 3 y/o now! BFP 2.28.17, EDD 11.8.17 - baby girl, miscarried at 11 weeks on 4.21.17 BFP 11.28.17, EDD 8.8.18, delivering in July - another rainbow baby boy!
Re: sleepovers at grandparents' houses. That's kind of strange to me. I didn't grow up around my grandparents, though, and we don't live close enough to any that it would happen anytime soon, so it's not something I've even thought about. We do have my mom come and watch DS so we can go to a show or a concert or a date night, and she'll put him to bed. If we lived in the same state, I'd probably be fine with my parents taking him for a night or even a weekend at their house, just because I know he's super comfortable there and I trust them.
April Siggy Challenge: April Showers
About me:
29 y/o Married 6.26.11 BFP 12.23.13, EDD 9.2.14 - baby girl, born too soon at 22w6d due to a placental abruption on 5.5.14 BFP 8.4.14, EDD 4.15.15 - rainbow son, born at 30w4d due to a placental abruption on 2.8.15, healthy 3 y/o now! BFP 2.28.17, EDD 11.8.17 - baby girl, miscarried at 11 weeks on 4.21.17 BFP 11.28.17, EDD 8.8.18, delivering in July - another rainbow baby boy!
Yes they are saying mass shooting possibly 20 to 50 people were hurt. There was a kid texting the the news anchor who is a friend and said they were hiding in small closet with a ton of people. They have the person in custody now.
@neeraja_k I am usually the same, but it is different when it isn’t to far from your home.
@calimom2524 People are just trying to make themselves feel better that they didn't do it. Don't get yourself down for super momming, that's crazy talk. I made really cute picture frames and put pictures of DS in them for DH & my mom (and maybe made one for myself too). They are pinterest worthy.
@calimom2524 Don't let it get you down. Sounds like your "mom friends" are more insecure that they suck at having fun making things with their own kids, to me. You do you, and you love every minute of it, because the happy memories will last and mean the most.
Although given my penchant for being brutally honest, I'd probably put them in their place, and then "peace out" of the group. Because those types of people aren't healthy to be around.
@calimom2524 I'm so sorry! That's super crappy that you feel bad about something that you enjoyed and *gasp spent time doing with your kiddo! The mom shaming over everyfuckinglittlething needs to stop! If you want to AW and post a pic of your valentines I'll love-it the crap outta them. Hugs
@calimom2524 honestly...I'm a teeny tiny bit jealous I'm NOT a Pinterest mom. I think doing a bunch of crap for Valentine's Day is stupid "in general" because it's just another one of those made-up holidays that stresses me out because I have to do "stuff" for it. Also, I suck at crafts. But you do you. And I will keep buying crappy paper cards in a box because I will do me! Lol!!!
@calimom2524 I'd never shame another mom for doing it, I just hate the pressure to do it! I feel like a lot of pressure comes from schools these days, and the Valentine cards are just one more thing moms are expected to do! Because of course kindergartners and first graders can't do elaborate things themselves. (And I saw a post on Sanctimommy today calling moms who buy cards from the store lazy parents )
@calimom2524 I get liking to cuddle with your toddler, but not sleeping. To me those things do NOT go together. I hate being touched when I'm trying to sleep. I'm lucky that DH has a C-Pap and we have a king sized bed so I can kick him back over to his side before I try to fall asleep. I do about 5-10 minutes of cuddling before I just want my personal space back.
Also, and I hate saying this, as it's usually a bullshit excuse, but the other moms are really just jealous. Having some moms take that kind of time and set the bar higher makes it tough to feel like you can keep up, or are doing well enough as a parent. Hand made cards are better. Everyone knows it, the kids know it, the moms know it. When someone else does something great, it makes your "good enough" effort seem, well, not good enough. It doesn't make the mom shaming ok, but it is absolutely a "keeping up with the Joneses" phenomenon. It can be hard to not be competitive with other moms when you know how judgey people can be. If you can't keep up, tearing down becomes the alternate option.
Me:32 DH:45 DSD: 20 DSS: 18 Team green baby due: Aug 6th, 2018
@lalala2004 that's actually the post I'm referring to. One of my friends re-posted that and went on a mom shaming rant about anyone who hand makes anything for their kids to take and a lot of our mutual friends chimed in on it basically continuing to blast "Pinterest moms" and blah blah blah. I know it's stupid, believe me I do, but I just agree with @mrsbubbles-2 that the mom shaming in any fashion needs to stop! Boxed valentine's, I totally get it. I don't hate in any way. I have a friend who forgot to even send them with her kid today and now she feels horrible and shouldn't. I agree @Firemanswife11 it's not even a big deal as valentine's day is pretty stupid, I agree with that! But it IS celebrated in schools and I just like to craft.
Thanks for the support ladies, I realize this is a very first world problem complaint but I think it's just the general "who cares what another mom wants to do, as long as I'm doing what I feel is right for my kid while not judging anyone else for what they do, we should all be good."
@calimom2524 I agree with @derbysquirrel, they're most likely just jealous. That seems to be what a lot of mom shaming stems from. I'm 100% a pinterest mom, because I love doing crafts and am artistic. Big deal. Of course I'm going to be a little extra with DS's birthday parties and when he's older, with the valentines we will make together. At least YOU had fun making them with him, and that's what's important.
April Siggy Challenge: April Showers
About me:
29 y/o Married 6.26.11 BFP 12.23.13, EDD 9.2.14 - baby girl, born too soon at 22w6d due to a placental abruption on 5.5.14 BFP 8.4.14, EDD 4.15.15 - rainbow son, born at 30w4d due to a placental abruption on 2.8.15, healthy 3 y/o now! BFP 2.28.17, EDD 11.8.17 - baby girl, miscarried at 11 weeks on 4.21.17 BFP 11.28.17, EDD 8.8.18, delivering in July - another rainbow baby boy!
This is something that I pinned right after E was born. I read it all the time as both reinforcement and reminder. You all will probably see me post this several more times before the littles are born.
I let DS sleep with me when DH is gone. We have a King though. When my dad was gone for the Navy we always got to sleep with my mom so DS gets to do it when DH goes.
OMG to the shooting. Makes me so scared for our kids.
@calimom2524 I think you’re awesome to have done that! And extra awesome because it was fun bonding time with your son!! Forget the negative people, they truly are jealous. Hold your creative head high!!
I wish DS could stay overnight with my parents but we live on different continents sooooo yeah
School shooting...hadn’t heard about it until now. It’s such a fucked up aspect of this country. I come from a country where even our police force is unarmed. I don’t think I’ll ever understand the gun mentality in this country. Unfortunately it seems like we’ve just become numb to it. It’ll be forgotten by tomorrow. If nothing changed after Sandy Hook, nothing will.
@ecwk remind me where you're from...I am having pregnancy brain. It would be so unusual for me to live somewhere where the police are unarmed. I get weirded out if I go to the mall and there are only "security guards" with no guns.
@mrsbubbles-2 the only reason we cloth is because I’m cheap and don’t want to pay for disposables!
@derbysquirrel when DS brought home his valentines I had an imediate reaction of mom guilt because even though we weren’t supposed to send candy to school all I did was get valentines with a scratch and sniff. So when I saw his bag over flowing and saw a few swirly straws and pencils I though “damnit, guess I gotta do something else next year.”
But going through it the majority were done just like I had. Names written as fast as the parent could because their 3 year old threw a fit after having to write his name three times. And just simple vday purchased cards. It’s hard not to compare ourselves to others out there. It’s even harder as a mom, cause we never blame the Dad for not making the cool valentines do we? Ridiculous.
Also, the mental load sucks ass. Why can’t the men handle that shit? I have to push a baby out my vagina! It’s the least they could do lol
@calimom2524 to be honest I am jealous of the moms that can do things like that, I have zero patience and no craft skills but that’s amazing that you do! I would never shame a mom for having talent that I do not, just admire from afar
@lalala2004 That's probably better than the numbness I feel. I'm so desensitized to this kind of thing because it happens so often, and I know nothing will change. I
Me:32 DH:45 DSD: 20 DSS: 18 Team green baby due: Aug 6th, 2018
It’s a somber time here. My friend wasn’t even able to pick up her child from daycare until hours later because of the shooting. The daycare was in to close proximity of the school. The children had to sit, there even though the person was in custody. So sad. This will impact our community for a while, not to mention it feels like we just had the airport shooting in Ft. Lauderdale. This is such a shitty feeling.
Re: WTF Wednesday 2/14
It says kids are still barricaded inside. The gunman is still there?!!! Omg!!
DH:45
DSD: 20
DSS: 18
Team green baby due: Aug 6th, 2018
I will I’ll never forget watching Columbine.
Once with the lighting and purposefully puffing at me and I asked her to please stop doing it. I understand it's her house, but if she wants to smoke, please do so outside, that it bothers me and she jumped all over me for being a whiny bitch. My husband gave her the "oh no you didn't" look, immediately packed up our stuff, packed up grandma's stuff, and we all left her there with the food on the table. Needless to say she hasn't really been civil to him since.
And this is honestly a big source of angst for me right now. I want to see her quit smoking for her health, but even after promising my dad on his death bed that she'd quit, she's clearly not going to. And I'm so tired of the drama with everything already that I can just imagine the nuclear fallout when I tell her I'm pregnant and she will not be smoking around my child, like she did with me. But it is what it is. When you're dealing with a selfish, immature mother, I guess I'll just have to be the adult. :P
As for the school shooting, it's awful, but I'm more mad at myself for not really caring anymore. Nothing meaningful changes for the better in the country and more innocent kids keep getting shot. It's just sad all around.
August 18 Siggy Challenge: April Showers
Yet another school shooting. This makes at least 17 in 2018 alone. What the actual fuck, America. This is literally the only place this is happening. Something needs to change.
About me:
Married 6.26.11
BFP 12.23.13, EDD 9.2.14 - baby girl, born too soon at 22w6d due to a placental abruption on 5.5.14
BFP 8.4.14, EDD 4.15.15 - rainbow son, born at 30w4d due to a placental abruption on 2.8.15, healthy 3 y/o now!
BFP 2.28.17, EDD 11.8.17 - baby girl, miscarried at 11 weeks on 4.21.17
BFP 11.28.17, EDD 8.8.18, delivering in July - another rainbow baby boy!
About me:
Married 6.26.11
BFP 12.23.13, EDD 9.2.14 - baby girl, born too soon at 22w6d due to a placental abruption on 5.5.14
BFP 8.4.14, EDD 4.15.15 - rainbow son, born at 30w4d due to a placental abruption on 2.8.15, healthy 3 y/o now!
BFP 2.28.17, EDD 11.8.17 - baby girl, miscarried at 11 weeks on 4.21.17
BFP 11.28.17, EDD 8.8.18, delivering in July - another rainbow baby boy!
@neeraja_k I am usually the same, but it is different when it isn’t to far from your home.
Although given my penchant for being brutally honest, I'd probably put them in their place, and then "peace out" of the group. Because those types of people aren't healthy to be around.
Me: 37 Him: 38
Married 11.07.2015
I get liking to cuddle with your toddler, but not sleeping. To me those things do NOT go together. I hate being touched when I'm trying to sleep. I'm lucky that DH has a C-Pap and we have a king sized bed so I can kick him back over to his side before I try to fall asleep. I do about 5-10 minutes of cuddling before I just want my personal space back.
Also, and I hate saying this, as it's usually a bullshit excuse, but the other moms are really just jealous. Having some moms take that kind of time and set the bar higher makes it tough to feel like you can keep up, or are doing well enough as a parent. Hand made cards are better. Everyone knows it, the kids know it, the moms know it. When someone else does something great, it makes your "good enough" effort seem, well, not good enough. It doesn't make the mom shaming ok, but it is absolutely a "keeping up with the Joneses" phenomenon. It can be hard to not be competitive with other moms when you know how judgey people can be. If you can't keep up, tearing down becomes the alternate option.
DH:45
DSD: 20
DSS: 18
Team green baby due: Aug 6th, 2018
Thanks for the support ladies, I realize this is a very first world problem complaint but I think it's just the general "who cares what another mom wants to do, as long as I'm doing what I feel is right for my kid while not judging anyone else for what they do, we should all be good."
August 18 Siggy Challenge: April Showers
About me:
Married 6.26.11
BFP 12.23.13, EDD 9.2.14 - baby girl, born too soon at 22w6d due to a placental abruption on 5.5.14
BFP 8.4.14, EDD 4.15.15 - rainbow son, born at 30w4d due to a placental abruption on 2.8.15, healthy 3 y/o now!
BFP 2.28.17, EDD 11.8.17 - baby girl, miscarried at 11 weeks on 4.21.17
BFP 11.28.17, EDD 8.8.18, delivering in July - another rainbow baby boy!
Sorry if it's huge...
Me: 37 Him: 38
Married 11.07.2015
OMG to the shooting. Makes me so scared for our kids.
I wish DS could stay overnight with my parents but we live on different continents sooooo yeah
School shooting...hadn’t heard about it until now. It’s such a fucked up aspect of this country. I come from a country where even our police force is unarmed. I don’t think I’ll ever understand the gun mentality in this country. Unfortunately it seems like we’ve just become numb to it. It’ll be forgotten by tomorrow. If nothing changed after Sandy Hook, nothing will.
@derbysquirrel when DS brought home his valentines I had an imediate reaction of mom guilt because even though we weren’t supposed to send candy to school all I did was get valentines with a scratch and sniff. So when I saw his bag over flowing and saw a few swirly straws and pencils I though “damnit, guess I gotta do something else next year.”
But going through it the majority were done just like I had. Names written as fast as the parent could because their 3 year old threw a fit after having to write his name three times. And just simple vday purchased cards. It’s hard not to compare ourselves to others out there. It’s even harder as a mom, cause we never blame the Dad for not making the cool valentines do we? Ridiculous.
Also, the mental load sucks ass. Why can’t the men handle that shit? I have to push a baby out my vagina! It’s the least they could do lol
@mrsbubbles-2 I love that so much!!
Me: 37 Him: 38
Married 11.07.2015
That's probably better than the numbness I feel. I'm so desensitized to this kind of thing because it happens so often, and I know nothing will change. I
DH:45
DSD: 20
DSS: 18
Team green baby due: Aug 6th, 2018
Me: 37 Him: 38
Married 11.07.2015