February AMA mamas

jengibre_zorro · February 2018

I'm just going to throw this out there, feel free to throw it right back if you think its stupid. Would anyone be interested in an Advanced Maternal Age monthly thread? (or should i say AWESOME maternal age?) Just hoping i'm not the only 35+ mama here. There's probably not much to discuss this early, but i know there are some additional tests down the line, etc. I'll start it, and if no one replies i'll just discontinue it.

1. Age Now / Age at Delivery

2. FTM / STM+? If STM+, is this your first AMA?

3. Best thing about being AMA?

4. Worst thing about being AMA?

5. Bonus: Which TV mom embodies your #momgoals?

jengibre_zorro · February 2018

1. Age Now / Age at Delivery 35/hopefully still 35, lol

2. FTM / STM+? If STM+, is this your first AMA? This is my second pregnancy, but first as AMA

3. Best thing about being AMA? Honestly, a lot of women in my family have had healthy pregnancies into their 40's, so i feel like age ain't nothin but a number

4. Worst thing about being AMA? Everyone around me is the same age but their kids are in grade school. My baby poop stories will fall on deaf ears, i'm afraid.

5. Bonus: Which TV mom embodies your #momgoals? I'm going to go with Roseanne, because let's be real here, and also i tend to be very sarcastic.

KFrob · February 2018

1. Age Now / Age at Delivery 35/36

2. FTM / STM+? If STM+, is this your first AMA? STM, first time AMA

3. Best thing about being AMA? I feel like I'm probably much more patient and relaxed than if I was a younger mom

4. Worst thing about being AMA? *TW* Obsessing over statistics about chromosomal abnormalities and loss related to maternal age *end TW*

5. Bonus: Which TV mom embodies your #momgoals? I'm going with Linda Belcher from Bob's Burgers

knottieamusements · February 2018

1. Age Now / Age at Delivery

38/39

2. FTM / STM+? If STM+, is this your first AMA?

First time mom

3. Best thing about being AMA?

That I don’t feel like I rushed into being a Mom, and I got a chance to do and try a lot of things before I made the decision to become a Mom

4. Worst thing about being AMA?

There is one?

Probably the worry that because I am older I am at greater risk of having a baby with a chromosomal abnormality.

5. Bonus: Which TV mom embodies your #momgoals?

Bones. Smart, sassy, and rocking the balance between family and career.

Lisa3379 · February 2018

1. Age Now / Age at Delivery: Just turned 36, so will still be 36 in October.

2. FTM / STM+? If STM+, is this your first AMA? STM. Technically I wasn't AMA when DS was born, but I turned 35 two months later.

3. Best thing about being AMA? Umm... I guess I was able to have a pretty good career for awhile until I became a SAHM.

4. Worst thing about being AMA? Probably less energy... I'm freaking tired chasing a 1 year old around.

5. Bonus: Which TV mom embodies your #momgoals? No clue... I don't think any of the shows I watch feature moms!

holly_owensmom · February 2018

1. Age Now / Age at Delivery
37/37

2. FTM / STM+? If STM+, is this your first AMA?
First time mom

3. Best thing about being AMA?
Feeling a little more settled in life.

4. Worst thing about being AMA?
Dealing with infertility associated with age. Also having dealt with family asking “when are you going to have babies?” And I’m worried that I won’t have the energy I want/need for interacting with my child.

5. Bonus: Which TV mom embodies your #momgoals?
from a movie. Helen Parr aka:elastigirl. Flexible, loving, and fiercely protective

knottieamusements · February 2018

The Incredibles is such an awesome movie.

Gizmo1231 · February 2018

@jengibre_zorro can I add this to the monthly threads on our welcome thread?

twinpeaksmama · February 2018

1. Age Now / Age at Delivery
I'm 35 now, will be 36 when I deliver.

2. FTM / STM+? If STM+, is this your first AMA?
I'm a second time mama. I had my daughter when I was 34.

3. Best thing about being AMA?
I have serious anxiety, so the best thing about being AMA to me, is there are a lot more ultrasounds and tests. This definitely puts my mind at ease.

4. Worst thing about being AMA?
Greater risk of things potentially going wrong

5. Bonus: Which TV mom embodies your #momgoals?

I think I'm a mix of Claire Dunphy from Modern Family and Linda Belcher from Bob's Burgers. (My husband and I dressed as Bob and Linda for Halloween a few years ago)

jengibre_zorro · February 2018

@gizmo1231 Yes, please, since it looks like there is a handful of us!

jengibre_zorro · February 2018

Question: Does anyone plan to see a midwife rather than an OB, or is it even an option? I saw a midwife last time around and i loved her so much, but i'm not sure if they will make me see an OB now because of the high risk technicality. My appointment isn't for a few weeks, but i really hope i can have my midwife!

keiragann · February 2018

1. Age Now / Age at Delivery 35 or 36 depending

2. FTM / STM+? If STM+, is this your first AMA? STM and yes I was 33 when DS was born

3. Best thing about being AMA? No idea

4. Worst thing about being AMA? Being high risk

5. Bonus: Which TV mom embodies your #momgoals? Speechless

blee530 · February 2018

1. Age Now / Age at Delivery
35/36
2. FTM / STM+? If STM+, is this your first AMA?
STM, first as AMA. I was 29 for my first
3. Best thing about being AMA?
?
4. Worst thing about being AMA?
None of my docs have mentioned anything yet, so I haven't really thought about it yet. Only issue was actually getting pregnant.
5. Bonus: Which TV mom embodies your #momgoals?
I just googled best tv moms for ideas and Kitty Forman from That 70s show cane up, so we'll go with her, lol.

Laumb11 · February 2018

1. Age Now / Age at Delivery 36/37

2. FTM / STM+? If STM+, is this your first AMA? STM first time AMA

3. Best thing about being AMA? ummm being wiser?!

4. Worst thing about being AMA? tests, age here is not a good thing

5. Bonus: Which TV mom embodies your #momgoals? Ha, Teddi from real housewives! love her

kc091118 · February 2018

Age Now / Age at Delivery
35/2 weeks after my 36th bday

2. FTM / STM+? If STM+, is this your first AMA?
4th pregnancy, second bring AMA. Hoping for my 3rd take home baby after a 16 week loss.

3. Best thing about being AMA?
Being more financially stable this time around. I worked full time with my 1st pregnancy and part time with my second, so to be home on the couch for 6 Hours with 2 school age kids is pretty awesome.

4. Worst thing about being AMA?
So much more exhausted and sick that pregnancy in my mid-late 20s

5. Bonus: Which TV mom embodies your #momgoals?
Marge Simpson. Lol

jennybean80 · February 2018

1. Age Now / Age at Delivery
37, I’ll be 38 in august
2. FTM / STM+? If STM+, is this your first AMA?
This will be baby 4. I was 30 when my first was born, then 33 when my twins were born.
3. Best thing about being AMA?
More experience in life, more stable career.
4. Worst thing about being AMA?
Not sure. I don’t have the chromosome risks since this babe is from IVF and the eggs were from when I was 33. I guess I’m tired as hell!
5. Bonus: Which TV mom embodies your #momgoals?
Bernadette Fromm Big Bang Theory.

mwmiller4 · February 2018

1. Age Now / Age at Delivery: 36/37

2. FTM / STM+? If STM+, is this your first AMA?
STM. I was 34 with DD
3. Best thing about being AMA?
I agree with having done so much stuff—I don’t feel like I’m missing out on anything.
4. Worst thing about being AMA?
The fears about something going wrong.
5. Bonus: Which TV mom embodies your #momgoals? Claire Huxtable

mwmiller4 · February 2018

@jengibre_zorro I saw midwives with my first and was going to with this one. We’ve moved since having DD and the drive back to the midwives is insane. It was giving me more anxiety than the anxiety over switching to a new practice. I LOVE my midwives, can’t recommend them highly enough and cried when I called to get my records (and then when they called back to make sure everything was ok). I hope you find some you love as much!!

knottieamusements · February 2018

jengibre_zorro said:

Question: Does anyone plan to see a midwife rather than an OB, or is it even an option?

I’m planning to see an OB, but am also looking into using a doula. While my friends and family are all super supportive of me, none of us have been through this recently, so I’m looking for someone to help me through it in the been there, done that sense.

northbeach3 · February 2018

1. Age Now / Age at Delivery
36 / 37 in august

2. FTM / STM+? If STM+, is this your first AMA?
first time mom

3. Best thing about being AMA?
second to the poster above who said all the monitoring! i also have high anxiety so can't wait!
also second to the ladies who said they have accomplished a lot and don't feel like they've missed out.

4. Worst thing about being AMA?
infertility... the whole process just to get here has been overwhelming.
also maybe having a youngin' when everyone else has older kids; not feeling too identified with younger moms.

5. Bonus: Which TV mom embodies your #momgoals?
Claire Huxtable (Cosby Show) and Hilda Suarez (Ugly Betty) with a dash of Lorelai Gilmore (Gilmore Girls)

knottieamusements · February 2018

northbeach3 said:

4. Worst thing about being AMA?
infertility... the whole process just to get here has been overwhelming.
also maybe having a youngin' when everyone else has older kids; not feeling too identified with younger moms.

Me too! Especially reading things online- all the new mamas seem to be younger than me. (Even in this thread so far, I’m the old lady! Ha!)

Age wise, there is about a 6 year spread among my cousins. Some of my cousins are already grandparents (!) and others have kids under 2. I try to focus on the babies, not the super young grandparents...

lest12 · February 2018

Hi all!

1. Age Now / Age at Delivery
36/37

2. FTM / STM+? If STM+, is this your first AMA?
3rd kid, 1st AMA

3. Best thing about being AMA?
Hm, glass half full... plenty of seniority at my job, so no problem asking for the full maternity leave allowed

4. Worst thing about being AMA?
Worried about rebounding from another c/s... and losing weight again (I'm refusing to think about all of the other scary things)

5. Bonus: Which TV mom embodies your #momgoals?
Goal: Claire Huxtablr Reality: Marie Barons lol

ashin121 · February 2018

1. Age Now / Age at Delivery: 34/35 (looked up to make sure, and at age of delivery if 35 and older then = ama. So here I am. )

2. FTM / STM+? If STM+, is this your first AMA? Stm and first ama

3. Best thing about being AMA? Stable - financially, emotionally, career, relationships. Traveled alot and purchased everything I "needed" lol.

4. Worst thing about being AMA? Tired. The multiple miscarriages (4 total and one CP). Also the thought of retiring later and the thought that I'll be in my 70s when my kid is 35.

5. Bonus: Which TV mom embodies your #momgoals? Mix between Katie Otto from American housewives and Beverly from the Goldbergs. Both are so funny!

SweetSweetTooth · February 2018

@KFrob check out the book Expecting Better! Has all of that info researched and together for you! Not as scary

norahkate · February 2018

1. Age Now / Age at Delivery

37/37 (38 in November)

2. FTM / STM+? If STM+, is this your first AMA?

fifth time mom (I just typed fourth and had to correct it ) but first time AMA (34 when my youngest was born)
3. Best thing about being AMA?
I am more laid back (but that may be more that this is our fifth than actually age related, although I suppose they are tied together somewhat)
4. Worst thing about being AMA?
Definitely feeling the symptoms a little more strongly this time around, but that's about it so far.
5. Bonus: Which TV mom embodies your #momgoals?

Not sure if it is mom goals so much as reality, but I am pretty sure that Frankie Heck from the Middle is my spirit animal

jengibre_zorro · February 2018

@lest12 - thats a really good point! I have a much younger cousin that just had a baby, and couldn't fathom how she HAD to go back to work after 6 weeks. It really made me realize how lucky i am that i have the financial means to take at least 12 weeks off and my job would be waiting for me. I would not be in that boat in my twenties for sure.

@mwmiller4 - i'm sorry you had to find a new practice due to moving! Thats exactly how i feel. If they won't let me have a vbac and i have to switch to the other hospital in town i will be devastated!

@knottieamusements - I had a doula last time, and it was the best money i ever spent. We will definitely have one this time around, even if i am forced into a repeat c-section (hopefully not!)

HoosOnFirst · February 2018

1. Age Now / Age at Delivery

35/36

2. FTM / STM+? If STM+, is this your first AMA?

This will be my second, but first at AMA. DD was born when I was 33.

3. Best thing about being AMA?
I’m kinda jazzed insurance will probably cover more stuff with less issue?

4. Worst thing about being AMA?
More anxious than I should be.

5. Bonus: Which TV mom embodies your #momgoals?

Beth Smith from Rick & Morty.

bethica83 · February 2018

1. Age Now / Age at Delivery
34/35

2. FTM / STM+? If STM+, is this your first AMA?
FTM

3. Best thing about being AMA?
I am so much more confident about who I am and so much more financially comfortable than if I had done this in my twenties.

4. Worst thing about being AMA?
I'm not sure.... I mean, there are some risk factors but I'm trying not to freak myself out. Also, I'm a little sad that my kids will be pretty young when they lose their grandparents.

5. Bonus: Which TV mom embodies your #momgoals?
I legit cannot answer this... I don't watch enough TV! I will say one of the things on my "to-do" list is to create a mission statement about what our parenting goals are with my husband. Something we can point at when we aren't sure how to handle a tough moment. Something to help us keep the long-term goal of raising a functional adult in mind when we're in the trenches with a cranky toddler and also in those tough teenage years and all the in-between years.

bethica83 · February 2018

jengibre_zorro I will probably see an OB just because that's what is available at my favorite clinic but my best friend's mother is a midwife and I know I can lean on her a bit for advice sometimes too. I don't see why you couldn't see a midwife if that was your preference so for sure ask about it!

knottieamusements · February 2018

bethica83 said:

I will say one of the things on my "to-do" list is to create a mission statement about what our parenting goals are with my husband. Something we can point at when we aren't sure how to handle a tough moment. Something to help us keep the long-term goal of raising a functional adult in mind when we're in the trenches with a cranky toddler and also in those tough teenage years and all the in-between years.

Wow! That sounds like such a great idea! One of the things I have been struggling with is how to raise a kid with my values when I know a lot of days I’m going to be more worried about laundry and missing toys than ethics lessons.

bethica83 · February 2018

@knottieamusements ... Yes - laundry, missing toys, dishes, homework, permission slips to sign, activities to get to and on and on. This is exactly why I want to do a mission statement. Then my husband and I can also remind each other of the mission when we see the other get caught up in the moment. Honestly, from talking to my friends who have children, it seems that of opportunities to impart your values do just naturally come up - but it is far easier to impart them when you've defined them and are looking for the teachable moments.

vjmc421 · February 2018

I’m a little late to the post, but I just found out I’m expecting my third!

1. Age Now / Age at Delivery 36/37

2. FTM / STM+? If STM+, is this your first AMA? STM+, but first AMA

3. Best thing about being AMA?
Experience, greater financial security

4. Worst thing about being AMA?
More awareness of what could go wrong, greater risks

5. Bonus: Which TV mom embodies your #momgoals?
Kitty Forman

tropical1982 · February 2018

1. Age Now / Age at Delivery 35/36
2. FTM / STM+? If STM+, is this your first AMA? STM+ (2 boys - 5 & 3) but first AMA pregnancy
3. Best thing about being AMA? Experience and security
4. Worst thing about being AMA? Being put into AMA category because you crossed an imaginary threshold. I want to find out what the difference is in pregnancy testing so that I get some benefit to this "geriatric pregnancy" :rolleyes:
5. Bonus: Which TV mom embodies your #momgoals? Can't think of anyone. I'm definitely not an "extra" type of mom but I want to do the best for my kids within reason and resources (time included).

knottieamusements · February 2018

tropical1982 said:

I want to find out what the difference is in pregnancy testing so that I get some benefit to this "geriatric pregnancy" :rolleyes:

As far as I can tell, the benefits are extra stress about actually conceiving and more stress about possibly having a baby with a chromosomal abnormality.

So far my only “extra” testing is with a genetics counselor in about 2 weeks.

Yippee!

CB0425 · February 2018

1. Age Now / Age at Delivery
35 (as of yesterday)/35
2. FTM / STM+? If STM+, is this your first AMA?
STM. I had my first when I was 33
3. Best thing about being AMA?
The timing just feels right. I feel more settled due to life experiences and stable career like others have stated.
4. Worst thing about being AMA?
I'm not sure yet.
5. Bonus: Which TV mom embodies your #momgoals? Claire Huxtable..trying to balance being a working mom and family...how her facial expressions say it all...and laughing through all the inevitable mayhem.

bethica83 · February 2018

tropical1982 said:

4. Worst thing about being AMA? Being put into AMA category because you crossed an imaginary threshold. I want to find out what the difference is in pregnancy testing so that I get some benefit to this "geriatric pregnancy" :rolleyes:

Geriatric pregnancy!

Image: https://media.giphy.com/media/pRJk6wqKlwpDq/giphy.gif

And yes. It's an imaginary line.

jengibre_zorro · February 2018

Update: I did find out that i will not be able to use the midwives this time. They are considering it a high-risk pregnancy by default because of AMA and a previous c-section. I am super bummed, but i did find out that currently all the OB's at my practice are women, which is kind of cool. I'm just annoyed at being lumped into the high risk group, when i really don't think there is anything else causing me to be so.... #oldmomprobs

tropical1982 · February 2018

Well it's good you found out early on. There are some MD's that are less invasive than others and support mom's wishes for less unnecessary intervention so hopefully the OB practice you are goign to will support you as much as possible!

DH was not comfortable with midwives or a birth center so we went with a MD that was pro-natural birth (my option) and a doula. Both times the doctor just showed up to catch the baby lol. I wouldn't have it any other way!

jengibre_zorro · February 2018

@tropical1982 - that's reassuring! We're trying for a VBAC this time, and so far they seem very supportive, and actually encouraged it, so i think that's a good sign!

knottieamusements · February 2018

@jengibre_zorro - I’ll second the suggestion for a doula. This is my first pregnancy, but all the information I have read indicates that using a doula is correlated with lower intervention labor experiences.

I’m planning to hire one both because of that and I feel like I need an experienced partner to go through this with. I love my support person, but he is a kid in a candy store about this.

jengibre_zorro · February 2018

@knottieamusements - truer words were never spoken. I actually had a doula with my c-section (it was unplanned) and even though shit completely and utterly hit the fan, she was advocating for me when i couldn't (and cleaning barf out of my hair). I can only imagine how important it will be if i (hopefully) get to actually deliver the baby this time!!

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