July 2018 Moms
zombiehoohaa
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Mental Health Check-in weeks of 1/25-2/1
zombiehoohaa
member
***This thread has a general trigger warning.***
This is a safe place for more detailed support in mental health, struggles, and successes.
Whereas general stress and issues are often discussed in several dailies, this place is for a more focused discussion of the impact of mental health. Members are encouraged to use thoughtfulness and depth to examine feelings, barriers, and useful supports.
Whereas general stress and issues are often discussed in several dailies, this place is for a more focused discussion of the impact of mental health. Members are encouraged to use thoughtfulness and depth to examine feelings, barriers, and useful supports.
This post can be replied to at any time during the next 2 weeks. Not limited to those with a mental health diagnosis, but please be sensitive to others.
Feel free to share, vent, or support other members on this thread. Share a picture/gif that expresses how you feel or provides some comfort.
If you need help getting started, try filling out the form below:
Mental health diagnosis (if you have been) or What brings you to this thread today?
How are you feeling?
Feel free to share, vent, or support other members on this thread. Share a picture/gif that expresses how you feel or provides some comfort.
If you need help getting started, try filling out the form below:
Mental health diagnosis (if you have been) or What brings you to this thread today?
How are you feeling?
Re: Mental Health Check-in weeks of 1/25-2/1
Since my mil passed away 2 days after my birthday, unexpectedly, DH has not been in the right frame. He is experiencing panic/anxiety attacks, which have put him out of work for almost a month. I am having a hard time supporting him in this because of my own mental issues + pregnancy. He is also going to be seeing a counselor today, so I am extremely happy he is seeking help. He has said he is not able to fully enjoy the pregnancy journey because of the loss of his mom. Needless to say, we are struggling yet managing day by day.
Hopefully, we will get through this and both feel better.
I am also looking to get back on my medication. I had been really good at identifying my spirals and talking myself down, but with the extra hormones its taking me a lot longer. I want to wait til 20 weeks so the midwife has a note to write prescription at my next appt. For me, my particular medication has a chance of causing heart defects, and I need to just not have that be in the back of my head when I go back on, so waiting til everything is developed and what have you.
I spoke on the phone with my therapist this morning and she's thinking the hormones are kicking off a protective instinct due to the PTSD and then sending my OCD into a nesting overdrive and that I'm just overwhelmed by the giant to-do list we have, but I have an appointment next week. In the meantime, she wants me to try to avoid my escape habit, which is cleaning.
DH took the day off from work and is getting things done around the house today in hopes it will help me feel less overwhelmed and less like I'm drowning. It's just after 8 am here, and he's already hung a coat rack, unloaded the dishwasher, finished painting a table and did the laundry. Letting him fold the clothes was so so hard!
I have such a hard time admitting I have mental health struggles, because mine seem to pale in comparison to what other people suffer. I do realize that isn't fair to myself or my symptoms, but my family is not open about mental health issues.
*TW* My youngest brother suffered from anxiety, depression, gender identity issues, plus some others he and I never got around to talking about I'm sure. We almost lost him in high school due to these things and he fought hard for a good 10 + years but eventually we lost him to those struggles. His were so severe, that talking about mine openly with the family was usually taken as whining, which resulted in just being told I'm too sensitive or otherwise ignored. Only my husband and one cousin are aware of the incident that gave me the lovely PTSD parting gift, and they are also the only two I feel safe enough to share it with anyway. It's really only because of we went through that with my brother that I'm trying to be better about being open about my own issues.
I don't bring up my brother looking for sympathy, only to help remind myself why I'm trying to be more responsible about my own mental health. Some people don't understand how hard it can be to be trapped by your own brain.
I’m definitely having ups and downs. Just trying to get by day by day.
@SmashJam Inching ever closer to 20 weeks. Hang in there. Would getting back on the medication at a lower dose still carry the same risks? You've probably already looked into that, and I completely understand the worry.
@elizabethrn87 Hugs back at you!
Sending you all creepy internet hugs! You are all so strong!
@SmashJam The extra hormones are definitely making it harder for me to manage my anxiety than it was before, so it's not just you feeling that way.
@noideawhatshesdoing Life is always going to be that way - there's always going to be someone worse off than you. But that doesn't diminish the fact that you have things that you're struggling with. I hate to use the term "survivor's guilt," but I feel like that's a bit of what you're going through. I feel that way with my struggle with infertility - how can I complain about what I went through when there are so many women out there who had to go through so much worse than I did and still don't have their babies? But what I went through was still hard for me. It's the same with your situation. Your brother went through a terrible ordeal. You can still remember that and respect how hard it was for him while, at the same time, recognizing that you're going through a lesser, but still difficult, form of mental health problems. Your issues are still worthy of being recognized and treated. I'm glad that you at least have two family members who you feel comfortable opening up to about it. Also - man oh man do I understand the feeling of being trapped by your own brain.
As for me, my anxiety has been through the roof. I had a couple of days when I felt anxious for no reason, and I've been anxious about all the work I have piled up from the first trimester morning sickness extravaganza. Then the other day I had a panic attack because I accidentally chipped some paint off of a door frame. Our house has lead paint under all the coats of modern paint on the trim, so I started panicking about lead exposure. Because I've been on Prozac my whole pregnancy, I've also been anxious about the potential for heart defects (studies show just a slightly elevated risk for them). None of my doctors are worried about heart defects, but my obgyn decided that, because of my severe anxiety, I should just go ahead and see the MFM doctor to be screened for them to ease my mind. The MFM doctor basically told me he wasn't worried at all but also thought that I should get screened to ease my anxiety. OH and my insurance company decided to suddenly start denying coverage of my Metformin, so I had to write them a 3 page letter and attach medical study abstracts showing that it helps prevent gestational diabetes in women with PCOS in order to get them to cover it. They finally did, but that was a huge stress for me and took up a lot of my time this week.
medication. At that time I maybe was on celebs or Wellbutrin? Now having the bipolar diagnoses - the medications I think carry a higher risk by that’s because neither my OB or my mental health doctor can actually tell me why they are risky. I think wish they would have sent me to MFM to discuss rather then saying go ahead and stay off.
After my saughter was was born I spent money like crazy- this was when I realized I was “manic”. I’ve done this before and gotten myself into debt and then out. And I’m still working to get out from after she was born. I’m nervous what will happen after this baby although I’m aware to watch for it and my husband is too.
@wildtot I'm glad your husband is supportive of counseling! Is that something you do together? There are some days where I think that therapy with DH would be a really good idea and others where I would enjoy the safe space of venting alone.
@beanship what a cluster with the Metformin! I am glad you got it covered again.
Hi All, I just have had a bad day. This pregnancy was a huge surprise (I am 41, infertile, we tried for years for a second, so by this age we had given up and moved on). I have been happy about it, but today I just had major anxiety about it all. I feel like we won't be able to do this well, I have been a SAHM since we moved over the summer, and really miss working. It looks like I won't be working anytime soon, which adds to my bad feelings about myself (my job has always been tied closely to my self worth).
Anyway, I am hoping the anxiety will lessen and I will feel better, but I have battled anxiety my whole life and I know it's always there around the corner.
Thanks for this thread and the ability to vent.
DS born via unplanned C-section at 40w6d
been doing ok this week. DS has been better at sleep his usual so I’m more relaxed in that sense but i keep having work dreams and that just tells me I’m starting to feel a bit stressful there. Glad it’s finally getting the weekend!
Glad your little guy has been better at sleeping!
@noideawhatshesdoing I know what you mean about body image! I struggle so much in the first 3-4 months of pregnancy because I can't tell I am pregnant yet and I just feel huge! I am finally starting to feel a little less blobbish but sometimes its hard!
I am also feeling better today. It is like a switch was flipped. I was just super down yesterday about everything but have managed to climb out of the spiral, which is nice. Maybe it's because it was sunny out? Sometimes all the gray and snowy skies here can be hard!