@legallykate after 8. I was just barely and 8 with my second and thankfully all the other ladies giving birth that night didn’t want epis so I was able to get the doc. I was dying. Hands off to all you ladies who give birth without any meds of any kind.
My plan was to try for a med-free birth, but keep an open mind, since I didn't know what was going to happen or just how bad the pain would be. I felt like I was going in prepared to just roll with the punches and that I didn't have much of a plan. As it turned out, I had a lot more expectations than I thought, and I felt like I was constantly frustrated.
My water broke at 3am at 38 weeks, but labor didn't start. We waited 12 hours, but I still wasn't having real contractions, so we went to the hospital. They worry about infection after your water breaks, so they induced labor, first misoprostol, then pitocin. The induction meant I needed an IV and fetal monitoring. The IV and monitoring meant I couldn't walk without a pole, or try most of the positions I wanted. On top of that, I was counting on nitrous oxide for pain, but it was new at the hospital and they ran out of tubing, so it was unavailable. I made it until about 5am before I asked about an epidural. We decided to check my progress first before deciding (they hadn't checked at all yet since it increases the risk of infection) and I was fully effaced but only 1cm dilated. Picturing my pitocin induced contractions lasting 9 times as long, I asked for the epidural. It thankfully came very quickly, and I went right to sleep. When I woke up 4 or 5 hours later, they found I had done all the work while asleep and was now fully dilated. After a short wait, I started feeling a vague urge to push, and I pushed for about an hour, then he was born. I did tear, I have no idea if it was related to the epidural.
When I was in the middle of it, I felt like I was constantly being thwarted, not being allowed to even try any of the things I'd hoped for. Looking back, I can see that everyone was just doing the best they could to make sure we came out the other side safely. And I would do every last thing the same, since DS and I did come out of it alive and healthy.
This time, I want to try again for just nitrous oxide, but I feel like I have a much better idea of what all might change that plan. I guess I'm going to try to have a "it would be great if..." list, but I'll consider all of them as bonuses. Since I didn't have any real contractions not induced by pitocin, I still don't know if I can handle the pain without an epidural. But I had a great experience with the epidural, so I will definitely consider it this time.
I feel like I should add that I used a midwife practice in a hospital, and I felt like they were incredibly good at trying to meet your needs, no matter where you were on the spectrum of intervention/medication. I think I just didn't realize when I was in the middle of it that DS was in a fair amount of potential danger, so they just couldn't wait and see as much as I wanted.
Sorry, that turned out super long! I didn't expect it to be a novel!
@PregoMego2015 I had the same thing happen. I labored in medicated for about 8hrs. But after 7, I wanted the epidural. There was only 1 guy on staff, and he was tending to others. So after requesting it, I had to wait another hour and a half. At first I thought if I was close I would hold out and not get one, but I went into the hospital 4cm dialated and after 8 hrs, was still only at 4. I never went past 9 cm and wound up pushing her out in 30 min.
One thing I will totally suggest to everyone is to do perenium massages towards the end of your pregnancy. My hypnobirthing coach suggested it, and while slightly uncomfortable, I barely tore during labor.
I did not have a plan, did not care to have a plan at all other than doing whatever I needed to do to have a healthy pregnancy. It was a no plan, plan LOL
@legallykate I was 7cm when I asked for an epidural but they needed to get fluids in me prior to it and that never happened in time.
I’m all for having goals and knowing what you want during labor, but not a rigid plan. Even though it may freak people out, I think it’s important to make yourself aware of certain complications and ask your doctor how those are handled. I had planned on an unmedictaed birth with DH, but I showed up at the hospital 7cm dilated and asked for an epidural. Everything went downhill quickly after that, and there was no time for the epidural. I had been told roughly 12 hours earlier at my NST that DS was head down but he wasn’t. My OB wasn’t able to turn him and he was decelerating quickly. I was rushed back for an emergency c-section under general anesthesia and without DH there. It was nothing like the birth I pictured in my head and it took me a long time to come to terms with everything. Ultimately, DS made it into this world and that is really all that matters.
@lalala2004 I went to a chiro my entire last pregnancy as well. My son was in the perfect position and my labor was very short. In fact, he was in the perfect position for son long that his nose was like flat when he came out and remained crooked for several weeks. Haha!
I have a chiro I've been going to for years, but I've been scared to go since I got pregnant. I just feel like my baby is going to get squished when she tries to realign me.
I have a general plan for how I want my labor to go (epidural all the way- I'm not brave enough to try unmedicated), but I after seeing the craziness my cousin went through, I'm fine with giving in to medical interventions my doctor seems necessary. My hospital has the lowest C/S rate in the area, so I feel confident they wouldn't push for that unless it was a medical necessity. We're setting up a tour after my next appointment, so I'm excited to learn more.
Me: 28 DH: 29 Married: 6/2016 TTC #1: 12/2016 Benched due to deployment- Off the bench 8/8/17!
@legallykate my hospital allows you to ask for the epidural even if you are at 10cm and ready to push! They joked around “if you can hold it long enough”. I think a lot depends on Dr/midwife/hospital.
With my first I had an 8 hour unmedicated birth. Baby was 8lb 4oz and 21.5”. I just did the class the hospital offered and my husband was a self proclaimed doula, haha. We brought music with us, birth affirmation cards my DH made with ultrasound pictures and I sipped coconut water the whole time. Pushing felt like I was being tortured but it lasted 30 min. I had two minor tears in the vaginal wall but needed to be stitched only to stop them from bleeding.
There are so many circumstances that influence how your labor will go. Your labor nurse needs to be on board with what your plans and wants are. You need a supportive Dr or midwife, which you can gauge early on. My midwives answered all my crazy questions and my DHs questions, even if they made me want to slap him. I read all the Ina May books. I chose the hospital class over others (Bradley, birthing from within) because I wanted to be prepared for a c section and epidural. I didn’t want either of those things but my local birth classes highly discouraged intervention and I wasn’t comfortable with that.
Your midwife/dr should be knowledgeable on the frame of thought of your local birth classes, my midwives helped me land on the hospital classes because I was open to the epi/c section if I needed it.
I went into labor very calm and laid back, I think that helped a lot. I will say that I had no complications through pregnancy (aside from failing half my 3 hour glucose test) so that really helped the most. Your mindset does play a big part, it’s kind of like pooping in public. It won’t go as well if you are nervous about it.
Your mindset does play a big part, it’s kind of like pooping in public. It won’t go as well if you are nervous about it.
Yes, this, and don't be nervous about pooping while pushing either because...that's a thing. It probably will happen and even if everyone says it surely didn't...they probably lied. So just prepare for that up front. K. Bye.
Yes, this, and don't be nervous about pooping while pushing either because...that's a thing. It probably will happen and even if everyone says it surely didn't...they probably lied. So just prepare for that up front. K. Bye.
Yep! I pooped while pushing, I saw it and was immediately wiped up. DH swears up and down that I didn’t, silly thing. You won’t be able to tell you are pooping. There is so much wiping during the pushing process due to all the fluids coming out of your body. It’s really not a big deal at all, especially once you have your baby in your arms.
My DH does like to talk about how my vagina looked like a gaping cave and my midwife didn’t even have to hold me open to stitch me up.....he will say that but can’t admit that I pooped *facepalm*
@bellamy9 If my husband EVER said anything about my vag resembling a cave....Oh my gosh. I have seen birth photos (not mine, they were absolutely not allowed haha) of vaginas resembling a cave and I completely believe *mine* never looked like that. Ever. No way.
I had stitches too. My husband, God love him, was super involved in the birth, and even helping my doctor afterward because he's medically trained, so I feel like he just got way too much of my vagina already for one life's worth. I cringe. I'm so worried he's gonna want to check my cervix this next time or something. (Kidding.)
I actually don't think I pooped while pushing either time, even though I totally don't care. The first time (TMI) as soon as contractions started, my bowels were like "evacuate everything!" And I no joke pooped a dozen times before we got to the delivery room. There could not have been poop left in me by the time I started pushing.
That didn't happen the second time, but I only pushed through 2 contractions and she was out, it was fast and easy and I don't think I had time to poop.
The nice part about pooping everything out of your body while you're in labor was that I didn't have to poop again until like 4 days PP. that first PP poop was worse than labor, even after all of the stool softeners in the land.
DH was very involved in the first labor, he held a leg while I pushed for 2.5 hours, and he stupidly looked down as she was coming out and then almost fainted (he is a known fainter). The second time he was like "I'm just gonna stand off to the side" and the nurses held my legs. But that one was fast so it wasn't as involved for anyone.
I'm pretty sure my bowels emptied in early labor. I had it coming out both ends. But if I had pooped, I would have had no idea. I don't want to think about what things looked like down there. They asked if I wanted a mirror, and that was a hard pass.
I loved having my mirror! I'm doing it again this time. It was the coolest thing I've ever seen when DS started crowning. I also asked to see my placenta so I may be weird like that but how cool is it that our bodies create a whole brand new organ that supports the baby?!? I could geek out about this stuff all day!
FTMs - don't panic about the poop. In fact, when you're pushing you are supposed to use the same muscles that you use when you're having a bowel movement so if there's anything in there, it's gonna come out. In fact, when I was laboring down the head nurse told me to call her when I felt that I had to take the biggest poop of my life lol! Yeah, she never got to leave the room because DS was on his way!
I loved having my mirror! I'm doing it again this time. It was the coolest thing I've ever seen when DS started crowning. I also asked to see my placenta so I may be weird like that but how cool is it that our bodies create a whole brand new organ that supports the baby?!? I could geek out about this stuff all day!
FTMs - don't panic about the poop. In fact, when you're pushing you are supposed to use the same muscles that you use when you're having a bowel movement so if there's anything in there, it's gonna come out. In fact, when I was laboring down the head nurse told me to call her when I felt that I had to take the biggest poop of my life lol! Yeah, she never got to leave the room because DS was on his way!
I asked to see my placenta after DS2 and the nurse like shoved her fist in it showing me where his head was and stuff. It was cool but also...not. Haha I can't imagine being that nurse.
@mrsbubbles-2 I feel like we are scaring the FTMs. But I swear no one told me some of this stuff when I was a FTM. Like, I literally had NO IDEA that I would feel like my organs would fall out for 6+ weeks after giving birth vaginally. I didn't realized I'd be THAT sore. Or that I'd poop. I was in a BMB but I honestly don't remember people telling us these things. SUPER IMPORTANT THINGS! Sorry, I am getting way off topic and derailing this entire thread.
@calimom2524 yup! I had asked to see the placenta before the birth not even realizing that at that point DS would be out and I'd be marveling over the fact that I FREAKIN MADE A PERSON! Then here comes the nurse with the placenta in a big bowl and I was like yea yea that's nice lol!
I loved having my mirror! I'm doing it again this time. It was the coolest thing I've ever seen when DS started crowning. I also asked to see my placenta so I may be weird like that but how cool is it that our bodies create a whole brand new organ that supports the baby?!? I could geek out about this stuff all day!
I'm the same - loved having a mirror with #1 (with #2 was in the water so I couldn't but I could see much better than on a bed) and also asked to see the placenta. It is just crazy to see!
@Firemanswife11 shoot you're right - but I'm like you I'd rather be told the gory details when I have time to absorb them rather than like 2 weeks before you're supposed to give birth. Sorry FTMs if it's too much for 1st / 2nd tri!
@alinafed - It's so crazy! Our bodies are amazing!
I want to see all the things - mirror, placenta, etc. I am not at all squeamish and find the whole process fascinating. I actually saw my little cousin's birth when I was 13 - my mom thought it would be both educational and excellent birth control (which it apparently was, since it took me 2 decades to get knocked up after that!) and he was my aunt's third so she was just like sure whatever. I took pics of the placenta and brought them in for middle school show and tell, haha.
*TTC History*
Me: 37, MH: 38; Married August 2017
TTC #1 October 2017: BFP on 12/1/2017, DD born 7/24/2018 @ 37+1 after induction due to preeclampsia
TTC #2 January 2020: AMA, dx with DOR in May 2020
IVF July 2020: 16 eggs retrieved, 14 mature, 12 fertilized, 3 blasts, 2 PGT-A normal
FET 10/7/20: BFP on 10/12/20!!! (EDD 6/25/21); First beta 10/16/20 (9dpt): 148; Second beta 10/19/20 (12dpt): 621; Third beta 10/26/20 (19dpt): 4732; Fourth (and final!) beta 11/2/20 (26 dpt): 22,000+
I'm so worried he's gonna want to check my cervix this next time or something. (Kidding.)
dying
@delujm0 once I went into labor, I also pooped my brains out. I had a hard time even leaving the house because I could not stop. However, there was still more and I kept pooping while pushing
DH is a medic and was an EMT and is a pain in my ass at doctor's appointments. He's always asking if he can draw my blood. He's already been warned not to pull any of that when I'm in labor. Once when I was in the ER for dehydration, he kept squeezing my IV bag to make it go faster. I wanted to kill him.
Me: 28 DH: 29 Married: 6/2016 TTC #1: 12/2016 Benched due to deployment- Off the bench 8/8/17!
For the ladies who saw chiropractors, did insurance cover it at all? How do you find one specifically fir pregnancy? I’ve never been to one but heard rave reviews from this group as well as my previous month group.
@proudparent2b I found a lady who charges "what you can afford," so in that respect, I was super lucky. I know chiros can be relatively expensive. I haven't looked into the cost with my insurance but I think most cover something.
@Firemanswife11 haha, yeah, I wasn’t too happy about it at first but he’s super proud of himself for witnessing everything that I think it’s just some weird quirk he has going on. He also let me know one of our first times having sex after that, that my vagina did not look like a cave anymore. And he totally killed my already nonexistent mood.
We should have a post for “what they didn’t tell you the first time”. I also was completely taken off guard by that “empty womb” feeling. It felt so weird standing up, like my rib cage was collapsing on itself.
For the ladies who saw chiropractors, did insurance cover it at all? How do you find one specifically fir pregnancy? I’ve never been to one but heard rave reviews from this group as well as my previous month group.
My previous insurance paid for 30 visits a year. Now I have to pay OOP, but it goes towards my deductible. It’s $40 a visit, so it’s not terrible. I knew a lot of people that went to her, so I always think it's nice to get a recommendation, particularly from someone who used one during pregnancy.
I pooped and I knew it and tried to make jokes with the doc and nurses and they kept telling me I didn’t poop. I guess they thought I would freak out but I didn’t really care. I still think it’s funny they were lying to me lol
@legallykate I got the epidural at 10cm with DS2. The rule at my hospital is, “as long as you don’t have a baby in your arms.”
I tried for unmedicated with DS1 and after 20 hours of labor I got the epi at 7 cm. I was just done. So done. Of course, it stalled my labor even more and he wasn’t born for another 6.5 hours.
With DS2, I handled it all much better. I went into labor at 6 or 7 p.m., but my contractions were manageable. The Cubs were playing in the final game of the World Series and I COULD NOT miss it. And, I already knew the hospital didn’t have the channel, so maybe I was convincing myself contractions weren’t that bad. When the game ended around 1 a.m., I tried to sleep, but nope. Contractions were too strong. So, we went to the hospital. Sadly, I was only dilated 4.5 cm. But, labored med-free (with a hep lock because the hospital insists) for the next 12 hours.
I clearly have long labors.
I also have big babies. DS1 was 8lbs 14 oz and DS2 was 9lbs 2 oz.
The on-call doctor worried about shoulder dystocia with number two and said he may need to cut me “quite a bit” and recommended I get the epi since I was already kind of frazzled and panicky. So, at 10cm I had it placed and after three pushes DS2 slipped right out.
My plan is med-free again - at least Until the pushing phase. I’ve had episiotomies both times, so I dread to think of that without an epi. Does anyone have experience?
I’m obviously also concerned about how big this baby will be...
I hard vetoed the mirror. I felt like I was too “busy” to care about looking. So many people say that pushing was a relief, but I felt like pushing was the most painful part. I also pushed for 2 hours on a stool and in the tub where he was finally born.
I did love seeing the placenta though—the fact that our bodies not only grow a small human, but an extra organ to nourish it was amazing.
I read the Ina May books to feel empowered and the hypnobirthing for techniques. It helped some. When I was in labor, something one of my friends said to me was all I could think about and it became my labor motto: “Don’t lose your shit because you can’t get it back” and that kept me focused on just getting through each contraction and holding myself together. Obviously this wasn’t literal because I also definitely pooped, but couldn’t care less in the moment (or really even now).
Oh, fun fact, I kept telling DH when I was in transition with DS2 that I felt like my butthole was going to pop off and hit the wall. I kept making him lodge his hand between my butt cheeks. There’s my TMI for the night.
I had a plan, to do an un-medicated birth. What happened was rapid-onset pre-eclampsia and me in the labor and delivery ward, with my midwife, who was a “squat in a field of daisies and have your baby” kind of gal holding my hand and saying “you need a c-section to save your life”. This was all it took, I didn’t feel like a doctor who was going to miss his tee time was pushing me into anything. My midwife that I knew and trusted and who knew me was like holy %#*? your numbers are insane (protein count, blood pressure, etc.).
i had a birth plan and the hospital had a copy, I had things actually written down, but none of it happened. My daughters birth was rather traumatic so going into it this time, I don’t have rose-colored glasses about what to expect. I am a control FREAK and this was a humbling experience to say the least. My medical team has been encouraging with respect to a VBAC, which I would like because my csection took forever to recover for....I bled for 10 weeks (not a typo) and then really messed up my sciatic nerve because I was putting weird pressures on my back (it’s crazy when your abs are sliced in two and then have to heal, you don’t realize how much you use them for!)
Dont let me scare you - many mamas have c sections and are hobbling back and forth to the bathroom THAT DAY. It’s just my body did not recover easily from this, and it seriously traumatized my husband who pretty much associated our daughter with me almost dying for like the first 3 months of her life. It’s a birth experience I wouldn’t wish on my worst enemy.
I will I’ll certainly put a birth plan on paper again, but if I get preeclampsia again, all bets are off (again).
Did not want the mirror but did like feeling DS’s head with my hands as he was crowning.
Was really scared of pooping (even though I know that’s dumb) and I hope next time I won’t give a shit about it, so to speak.
I just mentioned a Doula to DH who’s like “you want to pay someone a grand to have them tell you not to get the epidural”. Bless his heart. He was half joking but still ::eyeroll::
Mirror: I liked it but it was apparently making my pushed less effective with 1 so they stopped. No time for 2/3, quick transition then 2 pushes.
With 2 my AMAZING nurse was sooooo driven to help me go med free annnnd to not tear, when I was struggling not to push and to wait to let baby come down, she grabbed my hand to feel the head ‘feel that? That’s your baby’s head. Focus, breathe and push when I say to’
And I agree on the comfort of trusting your hospital and care provider. I have felt entirely confident each time that if interventions were suggested they were needed. My hospital has very low intervention rates and my mw like specializes in this. It felt good to know that I could trust that it would be truly necessary if it came to surgery etc.
Also - while on the topic of birth plans - don’t forget to research and decide on the medical things they do for your baby after birth, (help me here other moms my memory is fuzzy) - I believe my hospital’s default was to do a hep B shot, a vitamin shot to help with blood clotting (in case of injury), and the stuff they put in the corners of the eyes. I waived everything except the vitamin (E?) shot. But you have to tell them if you don’t want something because in my experience the default was to give it.
@mozartsmuse Good point. My hospital wouldn’t let me decline the Erythromycin eye drops. They said it was mandatory. That’s definitely not the case at other hospitals. I then asked to delay, but the nurse pretty much told me no. I was a little frustrated, but in the glory of holding my newborn, so I shrugged it off.
Re: Let’s talk Low Intervention/Unmedicated Births
My water broke at 3am at 38 weeks, but labor didn't start. We waited 12 hours, but I still wasn't having real contractions, so we went to the hospital. They worry about infection after your water breaks, so they induced labor, first misoprostol, then pitocin. The induction meant I needed an IV and fetal monitoring. The IV and monitoring meant I couldn't walk without a pole, or try most of the positions I wanted. On top of that, I was counting on nitrous oxide for pain, but it was new at the hospital and they ran out of tubing, so it was unavailable. I made it until about 5am before I asked about an epidural. We decided to check my progress first before deciding (they hadn't checked at all yet since it increases the risk of infection) and I was fully effaced but only 1cm dilated. Picturing my pitocin induced contractions lasting 9 times as long, I asked for the epidural. It thankfully came very quickly, and I went right to sleep. When I woke up 4 or 5 hours later, they found I had done all the work while asleep and was now fully dilated. After a short wait, I started feeling a vague urge to push, and I pushed for about an hour, then he was born. I did tear, I have no idea if it was related to the epidural.
When I was in the middle of it, I felt like I was constantly being thwarted, not being allowed to even try any of the things I'd hoped for. Looking back, I can see that everyone was just doing the best they could to make sure we came out the other side safely. And I would do every last thing the same, since DS and I did come out of it alive and healthy.
This time, I want to try again for just nitrous oxide, but I feel like I have a much better idea of what all might change that plan. I guess I'm going to try to have a "it would be great if..." list, but I'll consider all of them as bonuses. Since I didn't have any real contractions not induced by pitocin, I still don't know if I can handle the pain without an epidural. But I had a great experience with the epidural, so I will definitely consider it this time.
I feel like I should add that I used a midwife practice in a hospital, and I felt like they were incredibly good at trying to meet your needs, no matter where you were on the spectrum of intervention/medication. I think I just didn't realize when I was in the middle of it that DS was in a fair amount of potential danger, so they just couldn't wait and see as much as I wanted.
Sorry, that turned out super long! I didn't expect it to be a novel!
One thing I will totally suggest to everyone is to do perenium massages towards the end of your pregnancy. My hypnobirthing coach suggested it, and while slightly uncomfortable, I barely tore during labor.
I’m all for having goals and knowing what you want during labor, but not a rigid plan. Even though it may freak people out, I think it’s important to make yourself aware of certain complications and ask your doctor how those are handled. I had planned on an unmedictaed birth with DH, but I showed up at the hospital 7cm dilated and asked for an epidural. Everything went downhill quickly after that, and there was no time for the epidural. I had been told roughly 12 hours earlier at my NST that DS was head down but he wasn’t. My OB wasn’t able to turn him and he was decelerating quickly. I was rushed back for an emergency c-section under general anesthesia and without DH there. It was nothing like the birth I pictured in my head and it took me a long time to come to terms with everything. Ultimately, DS made it into this world and that is really all that matters.
I have a general plan for how I want my labor to go (epidural all the way- I'm not brave enough to try unmedicated), but I after seeing the craziness my cousin went through, I'm fine with giving in to medical interventions my doctor seems necessary. My hospital has the lowest C/S rate in the area, so I feel confident they wouldn't push for that unless it was a medical necessity. We're setting up a tour after my next appointment, so I'm excited to learn more.
Married: 6/2016
TTC #1: 12/2016
Benched due to deployment- Off the bench 8/8/17!
With my first I had an 8 hour unmedicated birth. Baby was 8lb 4oz and 21.5”. I just did the class the hospital offered and my husband was a self proclaimed doula, haha. We brought music with us, birth affirmation cards my DH made with ultrasound pictures and I sipped coconut water the whole time. Pushing felt like I was being tortured but it lasted 30 min. I had two minor tears in the vaginal wall but needed to be stitched only to stop them from bleeding.
There are so many circumstances that influence how your labor will go. Your labor nurse needs to be on board with what your plans and wants are. You need a supportive Dr or midwife, which you can gauge early on. My midwives answered all my crazy questions and my DHs questions, even if they made me want to slap him. I read all the Ina May books. I chose the hospital class over others (Bradley, birthing from within) because I wanted to be prepared for a c section and epidural. I didn’t want either of those things but my local birth classes highly discouraged intervention and I wasn’t comfortable with that.
Your midwife/dr should be knowledgeable on the frame of thought of your local birth classes, my midwives helped me land on the hospital classes because I was open to the epi/c section if I needed it.
I went into labor very calm and laid back, I think that helped a lot. I will say that I had no complications through pregnancy (aside from failing half my 3 hour glucose test) so that really helped the most. Your mindset does play a big part, it’s kind of like pooping in public. It won’t go as well if you are nervous about it.
My DH does like to talk about how my vagina looked like a gaping cave and my midwife didn’t even have to hold me open to stitch me up.....he will say that but can’t admit that I pooped *facepalm*
I had stitches too. My husband, God love him, was super involved in the birth, and even helping my doctor afterward because he's medically trained, so I feel like he just got way too much of my vagina already for one life's worth. I cringe. I'm so worried he's gonna want to check my cervix this next time or something. (Kidding.)
That didn't happen the second time, but I only pushed through 2 contractions and she was out, it was fast and easy and I don't think I had time to poop.
The nice part about pooping everything out of your body while you're in labor was that I didn't have to poop again until like 4 days PP. that first PP poop was worse than labor, even after all of the stool softeners in the land.
DH was very involved in the first labor, he held a leg while I pushed for 2.5 hours, and he stupidly looked down as she was coming out and then almost fainted (he is a known fainter). The second time he was like "I'm just gonna stand off to the side" and the nurses held my legs. But that one was fast so it wasn't as involved for anyone.
FTMs - don't panic about the poop. In fact, when you're pushing you are supposed to use the same muscles that you use when you're having a bowel movement so if there's anything in there, it's gonna come out. In fact, when I was laboring down the head nurse told me to call her when I felt that I had to take the biggest poop of my life lol! Yeah, she never got to leave the room because DS was on his way!
Me: 37 Him: 38
Married 11.07.2015
August 18 Siggy Challenge: April Showers
Me: 37 Him: 38
Married 11.07.2015
@alinafed - It's so crazy! Our bodies are amazing!
Me: 37 Him: 38
Married 11.07.2015
Me: 37, MH: 38; Married August 2017
TTC #1 October 2017: BFP on 12/1/2017, DD born 7/24/2018 @ 37+1 after induction due to preeclampsia
TTC #2 January 2020: AMA, dx with DOR in May 2020
IVF July 2020: 16 eggs retrieved, 14 mature, 12 fertilized, 3 blasts, 2 PGT-A normal
FET 10/7/20: BFP on 10/12/20!!! (EDD 6/25/21); First beta 10/16/20 (9dpt): 148; Second beta 10/19/20 (12dpt): 621; Third beta 10/26/20 (19dpt): 4732; Fourth (and final!) beta 11/2/20 (26 dpt): 22,000+
@delujm0 once I went into labor, I also pooped my brains out. I had a hard time even leaving the house because I could not stop. However, there was still more and I kept pooping while pushing
Hello from Detroit!
DH is a medic and was an EMT and is a pain in my ass at doctor's appointments. He's always asking if he can draw my blood. He's already been warned not to pull any of that when I'm in labor. Once when I was in the ER for dehydration, he kept squeezing my IV bag to make it go faster. I wanted to kill him.
Married: 6/2016
TTC #1: 12/2016
Benched due to deployment- Off the bench 8/8/17!
i did poop with my third and I totally knew it. I mean... I could tell then they wiped it quick.
I dint believe I did for 1-2 given that and I was clearing my bowels a ton before.
11/18/16 missed m/c 9w1
08/03/17 no hb 8w
We should have a post for “what they didn’t tell you the first time”. I also was completely taken off guard by that “empty womb” feeling. It felt so weird standing up, like my rib cage was collapsing on itself.
I tried for unmedicated with DS1 and after 20 hours of labor I got the epi at 7 cm. I was just done. So done. Of course, it stalled my labor even more and he wasn’t born for another 6.5 hours.
With DS2, I handled it all much better. I went into labor at 6 or 7 p.m., but my contractions were manageable. The Cubs were playing in the final game of the World Series and I COULD NOT miss it. And, I already knew the hospital didn’t have the channel, so maybe I was convincing myself contractions weren’t that bad. When the game ended around 1 a.m., I tried to sleep, but nope. Contractions were too strong. So, we went to the hospital. Sadly, I was only dilated 4.5 cm. But, labored med-free (with a hep lock because the hospital insists) for the next 12 hours.
I clearly have long labors.
I also have big babies. DS1 was 8lbs 14 oz and DS2 was 9lbs 2 oz.
The on-call doctor worried about shoulder dystocia with number two and said he may need to cut me “quite a bit” and recommended I get the epi since I was already kind of frazzled and panicky. So, at 10cm I had it placed and after three pushes DS2 slipped right out.
My plan is med-free again - at least Until the pushing phase. I’ve had episiotomies both times, so I dread to think of that without an epi. Does anyone have experience?
I’m obviously also concerned about how big this baby will be...
I’m interested in Bradley. What are your book recommendations? I won’t have time for a class because of the boys.
I hard vetoed the mirror. I felt like I was too “busy” to care about looking. So many people say that pushing was a relief, but I felt like pushing was the most painful part. I also pushed for 2 hours on a stool and in the tub where he was finally born.
I did love seeing the placenta though—the fact that our bodies not only grow a small human, but an extra organ to nourish it was amazing.
I read the Ina May books to feel empowered and the hypnobirthing for techniques. It helped some. When I was in labor, something one of my friends said to me was all I could think about and it became my labor motto: “Don’t lose your shit because you can’t get it back” and that kept me focused on just getting through each contraction and holding myself together. Obviously this wasn’t literal because I also definitely pooped, but couldn’t care less in the moment (or really even now).
i had a birth plan and the hospital had a copy, I had things actually written down, but none of it happened. My daughters birth was rather traumatic so going into it this time, I don’t have rose-colored glasses about what to expect. I am a control FREAK and this was a humbling experience to say the least. My medical team has been encouraging with respect to a VBAC, which I would like because my csection took forever to recover for....I bled for 10 weeks (not a typo) and then really messed up my sciatic nerve because I was putting weird pressures on my back (it’s crazy when your abs are sliced in two and then have to heal, you don’t realize how much you use them for!)
Dont let me scare you - many mamas have c sections and are hobbling back and forth to the bathroom THAT DAY. It’s just my body did not recover easily from this, and it seriously traumatized my husband who pretty much associated our daughter with me almost dying for like the first 3 months of her life. It’s a birth experience I wouldn’t wish on my worst enemy.
I will I’ll certainly put a birth plan on paper again, but if I get preeclampsia again, all bets are off (again).
Did not want the mirror but did like feeling DS’s head with my hands as he was crowning.
Was really scared of pooping (even though I know that’s dumb) and I hope next time I won’t give a shit about it, so to speak.
I just mentioned a Doula to DH who’s like “you want to pay someone a grand to have them tell you not to get the epidural”. Bless his heart. He was half joking but still ::eyeroll::
With 2 my AMAZING nurse was sooooo driven to help me go med free annnnd to not tear, when I was struggling not to push and to wait to let baby come down, she grabbed my hand to feel the head ‘feel that? That’s your baby’s head. Focus, breathe and push when I say to’
And I agree on the comfort of trusting your hospital and care provider. I have felt entirely confident each time that if interventions were suggested they were needed. My hospital has very low intervention rates and my mw like specializes in this. It felt good to know that I could trust that it would be truly necessary if it came to surgery etc.
11/18/16 missed m/c 9w1
08/03/17 no hb 8w