For any moms with a c-section coming up right before a major holiday... check your pain meds when you get discharged and quickly forecast when you'll run out on your most likely dosage. I am learning the hard way that trying to get pain meds refilled when EVERYONE is on vacation is a ridiculous amount of phone tag.
I don't know if I'm qualified to give advice, but here's what I've learned from the last week: Take the pain meds. Don't overdo it. "Overdoing it" is probably about doing 80% of whatever I think I can totally handle. Partner with your partner! It's easily a 2+ person job to handle recovery & an infant needing a bit of extra care. I've learned that DH can and wants to do so much to help, and having him as a team-mate is huge. Our nighttime feedings go like this:
Dad: Change baby. Mom: Struggle out of bed, get set up for feeding.
Mom: Breastfeed. Dad: Warm up donor milk/supplementation bottle.
Mom: Feed bottle. Dad: Set up for followup diaper check/change (our LO likes to poop before he eats and pee immediately after.)
This holiday weekend has given me a chance to talk to a lot of the women in my family, including my husband's step-mom who is an MD PhD. Every single one of the women who have experienced both c-sections and vaginal births have said they felt like they healed far more quickly, and had fewer lingering side effects from their Cs. The MD PhD also mentioned that her friends who had c-sections only are battling significantly fewer long term consequences (like in their 50s, 60s and beyond) because of the stress that wasn't put on their pelvic floor.**
This isn't advice so much as maybe a bit of long-term hope/perspective that I really needed to hear in a tough week, that I thought my help anyone worried about their upcoming C.
** I've said "pelvic floor". I expect @failuretofly to swoop by in her PT hero cape any moment now.
@kyrwyn thanks for the encouragement! I’ve talked to sooooo many women that have had C-sections and the amount of positive feedback has been amazing! I believe there are pros and cons with every thing and for me being open to both vaginal and C-section birth from the beginning I think was a huge plus factor for me. I was never hell bent on having been a vaginal birth or C-section. I have experience in neither so I was completely open to both. Thank you so much for all your tips. And I’m hoping all is going well!!! Xoxo
@kyrwyn that's interesting because I've had a lot of women tell me that they found recovery from vaginal was better! But yes, a C does reduce your risk for PF issues, but does not eliminate the risk all together. I think part of the problem is women have been told for so long how to push and what position to push in (i.e. lay on your back, hold your breath and bear down) rather than being allowed to push as they feel comfortable, so it's really hard to say! I do know some women with prolapse have opted for a C section in subsequent births because of the reduction in risk, but others who've gone on to have further vaginal births without issues.
@failuretofly I think you're one to something with the historical bad advice/practice thoughts. It may be generational bias, too. The women I was talking to were largely my parents generation or older -- my cousins have had vaginal births and no c-sections, so this generation didn't get to chime in as well. It's possible certain things have faded from memory over the decades, too.
@kyrwyn it's nice to read something positive about C-sections. I've felt super discouraged about it this week. I think a big part of that was that my childhood best friend had her baby girl vaginally the day after my c-section and was up a few hours after giving birth and walked down to my room to visit me and baby when I could hardly stay awake/get out of bed still. The next day (day 3) I decided to make the walk down the longer hall to visit her and she was already discharged not even 24 hours after birth.
Another thing I'm not sure if anyone here has experienced is that my doctor decided to put the prevena 125 wound vac on me due to my lower abdomen hanging over my incision and history of being prone to infection. I'm hoping that this thing will be a blessing and a great decision but right now its causing me a lot of anxiety and it's a pain in the butt to carry around and shower with.
@kersey0208 my doc put the wound vac on me as well and its a complete pain in the ass!!!! Ill be glad to get it out in a week!!!!
I just feel defeated all around about mine. I feel like i cant do anything without needing some kind of help. I didnt have these issues at all with my first vaginal birth. I plan on talking to my doc about it at my week appointment if it continues while im home. I hoping its just cause im stuck in hospital bed and not home.
Reviving this thread as I prepare for tomorrow's c-section.
The OB is having me drink a bottle of citrate of magnesia to umm clear out for surgery. Has anyone done this before? Do I need to stay close to a bathroom - is it like immediate reaction or delayed?
im only concerned because we are taking DS1 To monster golf this afternoon and I'm not sure how I'm going to respond to this stuff.
@Marley629 I drank a bottle after my c-section bc the Senna they were giving me wasn't working. I didn't have a BM for 5 days after delivery. It started working within 6 hours. I have used it before and it worked in like a half hour. I also kept going like all day..it's for sure a stay close to the bathroom kind of thing for me. Good luck!!
I have mine on Friday and they didn’t give me anything to drink. My instructions were no nail polish, nothing to eat/drink after midnight, and to call two hours before we are scheduled to come in (which would be 3:30 am, seriously?).
Well lol I drank it but it didn't stay down long so it'll have to do...I can't keep anything down so it's prob not too big a deal.
The only other instructions I got were nothing to eat or drink after midnight (not even water) and to be there 2 hours before. I don't know how I'm gonna last from midnight until 2:30 pm with no liquid.
Mine is Monday, but I have to go to the hospital for a pre op appointment tomorrow. Has anyone gone to a pre op apt for their csection? My DS was an emergency csection so there was nothing to do to prepare!
@Marley629 Thanks! They told me they wouldn’t do my blood work til Monday morning right before the surgery because it has to be done within 3 days prior. So still not sure what is happening but I guess I’ll find out tomorrow!
Y'all are so lucky I been in hospital since the 30 nov and they have scheduled me for the 12 and I'm only due the 31. Wish I was home been able to prepare everything. My other half can be very forgetful for doing things and I'm freaking out about the house not been cleaned.. I'm so nervous for Tuesday I'm freaking out especially for the epidural cause I know that it hurts and I'm terrified of needles.
@evreka i was freaked at the thought of the epidural as well but its really not as bad as it sounds. The only part that stung For me was the numbing medicine and after that i didnt feel much of anything. I had a contraction in the middle of mine getting placed too. The contraction hurt worse than the epidural then after it its pure bliss
@evreka i was freaked out about the epidural with DS1 but honestly don't recall the epidural being painful at all with him. I'm sorry that you have been in the hospital so long.
Haven't posted this here yet, but as of Monday, we're planning a c-section because baby is breech. I'm scheduled for the 20th. I never really had a vision of labor/birth in my head and I was always planning on getting an epidural/not planning on a home birth/water birth/whatever (I didn't even write a birth plan or plan to) and I am SO annoyed by people's comments!
I tell people and they get concerned or they like, pity me. I'm honestly fine with it, and I know it's surgery and recovery isn't super fun but it's also a very routine procedure--women go through it every day. And it's planned, not emergent... I've had plenty of people make comments like this, and just now my coworker asked if they were going to try to turn her (I declined an ECV, so no) and he was like, "Well I know they say vaginal births are better for whatever reason. Maybe they can just push her through a stocking to simulate it [this was a joke, but...]." Anyway, am I missing something? He said something about the skull? Yes, babies have soft heads so they can fit through the birth canal, but I don't think there's really an advantage with vaginal birth vs c-section as it relates to the baby's skull... WUT. Also, what if I was super upset/worried about having a c-section and he just came over talking about how it's better for my baby the other way. That would be a super dick move. Okay I'm done. Hahaha.
@MJDsquared I think there are some benefits to babies going through labor (contractions, at least) because it squeezes their lungs or something? But it's not like your baby will be at a huge disadvantage for being delivered by c-section! And the only thing I know about the head is that c-section babies are less cone-headed, which seems to be an advantage (cosmetic, only), not a detriment. People are idiots.
Had my last appointment before my c-section next week! My pre-op instructions involve getting to the hospital at 5 am (for a 7 am section) and not eating or drinking anything after midnight the night before. That's pretty much it. Scheduling a pedicure now!
Married May 2014 DD born August 2016 Baby #2 due December 2017
@MJDsquared I swear I would if daid “oh did you deliver vaginally?” Cause there’s NO man that has as right to question you about anything. Ohhhhh this infuriates me.
@dkizz82 Right?! And he was born breech (vaginally) which of course he had to tell me. My OB was telling me how she was in med school (2000-2004) when the big study was published that prompted doctors to stop doing breech deliveries vaginally so I got to be like, "Yeah well they stopped doing that in like 2004."
@MJDsquared now that I’m officially a “C-section Mom” lol I can tell you , you are going to be just fine! I went into it with the same thought process. I was never set on having a vaginal birth, getting a midwife or having a C-section. I never gave birth before so I was open to whatever was best for my baby and me! And from the second they mentioned the Version I knew it wasn’t for me. Scared the shit out of me, even more then major surgery. I am beyond thrilled and happy with my birth experience having a scheduled C-section, I couldn’t boast more about it! For me I was very fortunate to recover well. Dont get me wrong I am taking it super easy but am able to be back in the swing of my normal daily routine plus all new mommy/baby stuff and I’m 10 days since Addie’s birth. I cannot stress to enough to take it easy and do not do stairs. Eat and rest when babe is sleeping and you will do just great!
As for people’s reactions, screw them. I found once I mentioned this is God’s plan for us or something related to God, people shut their traps. Lol. People say the STUPIDEST shit. I had a women say”Oh your not going to try and deliver her breech?” I wanted to smack the stupid off of her face but I just laughed and walked away. People are nuts. Anyways, I hope you have just as good of an experience asnI did! Xoxo
@MJDsquared - I'm with @ShyTonia as an unintentional c-section mom. Had been planning vaginal delivery but the only thing in my "birth plan" was getting LO and me through it safely. He was late, they induced, I made no progress, we ended up with a non-emergent c-section.
I've got to say, it wasn't as bad as I had feared and definitely had some advantages over vaginal delivery. Don't get me wrong - there's definitely a lot of pain - but we both came through it perfectly safely, it didn't take as long as vaginal would have, I don't have any tears or hemorrhoids, and my vaginal bleeding is pretty minimal since they cleaned things out pretty well after delivery.
I'm due Dec. 21 and am still waiting on my LO to make her arrival, but thank you all for sharing your C-section experiences. As a FTM, I don't have any set expectations (other than for baby and me to be healthy and safe), and hearing your experiences has further reinforced for me that things will be ok no matter which way I deliver. Thank you again!
@ShyTonia It's really nice to have your perspective since it's the same situation for both of us! And yeah the ECV already sounded painful and then my OB was like, "It's a 50% success rate" and you have to be ready to be rushed to a c-section if there are complications so I said no to that pretty quickly! Haha. Thanks, @rebeckyjoy! I definitely just think about the advantages of the C/S so I don't start getting too nervous.
I skimmed this thread before and then when I found out I was having a C/S I came back through and read more thoroughly, so I'm glad it's here!
I had my second c section on Friday. It’s Monday and I’m already mostly weaned off pain meds and walking around really well. The second time around is so much easier than the first probably because i knew what to expect. I still cried going in (mainly from nerves), but it was very easy and neither one of us had any complications. The first 24 hours you will still be coming down from the pain meds and everyone’s pain tolerance is different but stay on top of the pain meds if you need them and wear the belly binder! Good luck ladies!
Re: C-Section Moms
I don't know if I'm qualified to give advice, but here's what I've learned from the last week:
Take the pain meds.
Don't overdo it. "Overdoing it" is probably about doing 80% of whatever I think I can totally handle.
Partner with your partner! It's easily a 2+ person job to handle recovery & an infant needing a bit of extra care. I've learned that DH can and wants to do so much to help, and having him as a team-mate is huge. Our nighttime feedings go like this:
I cannot imagine doing all of it on my own every 3 hours.
This isn't advice so much as maybe a bit of long-term hope/perspective that I really needed to hear in a tough week, that I thought my help anyone worried about their upcoming C.
** I've said "pelvic floor". I expect @failuretofly to swoop by in her PT hero cape any moment now.
Another thing I'm not sure if anyone here has experienced is that my doctor decided to put the prevena 125 wound vac on me due to my lower abdomen hanging over my incision and history of being prone to infection. I'm hoping that this thing will be a blessing and a great decision but right now its causing me a lot of anxiety and it's a pain in the butt to carry around and shower with.
I just feel defeated all around about mine. I feel like i cant do anything without needing some kind of help. I didnt have these issues at all with my first vaginal birth. I plan on talking to my doc about it at my week appointment if it continues while im home. I hoping its just cause im stuck in hospital bed and not home.
The OB is having me drink a bottle of citrate of magnesia to umm clear out for surgery. Has anyone done this before? Do I need to stay close to a bathroom - is it like immediate reaction or delayed?
im only concerned because we are taking DS1 To monster golf this afternoon and I'm not sure how I'm going to respond to this stuff.
DX Diminished Ovarian Reserve, Factor V Leiden Mutation, Secondary Infertility
MFI (SA #1Count 11mill, Motility: 18%, Morphology: 1%)
AMH .328 | FSH 13.2
Well lol I drank it but it didn't stay down long so it'll have to do...I can't keep anything down so it's prob not too big a deal.
The only other instructions I got were nothing to eat or drink after midnight (not even water) and to be there 2 hours before. I don't know how I'm gonna last from midnight until 2:30 pm with no liquid.
DX Diminished Ovarian Reserve, Factor V Leiden Mutation, Secondary Infertility
MFI (SA #1Count 11mill, Motility: 18%, Morphology: 1%)
AMH .328 | FSH 13.2
DX Diminished Ovarian Reserve, Factor V Leiden Mutation, Secondary Infertility
MFI (SA #1Count 11mill, Motility: 18%, Morphology: 1%)
AMH .328 | FSH 13.2
DX Diminished Ovarian Reserve, Factor V Leiden Mutation, Secondary Infertility
MFI (SA #1Count 11mill, Motility: 18%, Morphology: 1%)
AMH .328 | FSH 13.2
I tell people and they get concerned or they like, pity me. I'm honestly fine with it, and I know it's surgery and recovery isn't super fun but it's also a very routine procedure--women go through it every day. And it's planned, not emergent... I've had plenty of people make comments like this, and just now my coworker asked if they were going to try to turn her (I declined an ECV, so no) and he was like, "Well I know they say vaginal births are better for whatever reason. Maybe they can just push her through a stocking to simulate it [this was a joke, but...]." Anyway, am I missing something? He said something about the skull? Yes, babies have soft heads so they can fit through the birth canal, but I don't think there's really an advantage with vaginal birth vs c-section as it relates to the baby's skull... WUT. Also, what if I was super upset/worried about having a c-section and he just came over talking about how it's better for my baby the other way. That would be a super dick move. Okay I'm done. Hahaha.
DD - 12/28/17
TTC #2 3/2019
BFP 5/2019 || MC - D&C 5/2019
BFP 2/2020 || EDD 10/10/2020
Had my last appointment before my c-section next week! My pre-op instructions involve getting to the hospital at 5 am (for a 7 am section) and not eating or drinking anything after midnight the night before. That's pretty much it. Scheduling a pedicure now!
Married May 2014
DD born August 2016
Baby #2 due December 2017
DD - 12/28/17
TTC #2 3/2019
BFP 5/2019 || MC - D&C 5/2019
BFP 2/2020 || EDD 10/10/2020
DD - 12/28/17
TTC #2 3/2019
BFP 5/2019 || MC - D&C 5/2019
BFP 2/2020 || EDD 10/10/2020
As for people’s reactions, screw them. I found once I mentioned this is God’s plan for us or something related to God, people shut their traps. Lol. People say the STUPIDEST shit. I had a women say”Oh your not going to try and deliver her breech?” I wanted to smack the stupid off of her face but I just laughed and walked away. People are nuts.
Anyways, I hope you have just as good of an experience asnI did! Xoxo
I've got to say, it wasn't as bad as I had feared and definitely had some advantages over vaginal delivery. Don't get me wrong - there's definitely a lot of pain - but we both came through it perfectly safely, it didn't take as long as vaginal would have, I don't have any tears or hemorrhoids, and my vaginal bleeding is pretty minimal since they cleaned things out pretty well after delivery.
Thanks, @rebeckyjoy! I definitely just think about the advantages of the C/S so I don't start getting too nervous.
I skimmed this thread before and then when I found out I was having a C/S I came back through and read more thoroughly, so I'm glad it's here!
DD - 12/28/17
TTC #2 3/2019
BFP 5/2019 || MC - D&C 5/2019
BFP 2/2020 || EDD 10/10/2020