PGAL Check-in w/o 10/18

ChloandCoco · October 2017

This is a safe space for those who are pregnant after a loss. General TW for this thread.

How far along are you

Any appointments coming up?

How are you feeling physically?

How are you feeling emotionally? (Dear diary posts and venting are welcome and encouraged here)

Questions?

GTKY: Who is your celebrity doppelgänger?

katie121209 · October 2017

1. 6 w 5 days today
2. First OB appt next Tuesday. Counting down the days!
3. I am feeling like crud from nausea. It comes and goes but basically eating carbs makes it feel better so I'm afraid I'm going to gain a ton of weight way too early.
4. More relieved after good betas last week, but now that it's been a whole week the nerves are starting to pop up again. Every time I go to the bathroom I worry there will be blood bc of the prior loss. Anyone else feel like this?
5. No questions at the moment!
6. I have no clue which celebrity I look like lol!

kbrown2385 · October 2017

How far along are you? 6 weeks 6 days

Any appointments coming up? Ultrasound on the 30th

How are you feeling physically? Exhausted and dizzy

How are you feeling emotionally? (Dear diary posts and venting are welcome and encouraged here) Just having the usual feelings. Overthinking every little thing and having moments of high anxiety.

Questions? None

GTKY: Who is your celebrity doppelgänger? I don’t know that I have one. I’ve never been told I look like anyone.

PatientlyWaiting10 · October 2017

How far along are you? 7+1

Any appointments coming up? TOMORROW!! SO EXCITED!

How are you feeling physically? I've been feeling really good overall. Just a little bit nauseous in the mornings or if I have to poop but otherwise good.

How are you feeling emotionally? (Dear diary posts and venting are welcome and encouraged here) I'm feeling good. I obviously am nervous but I am choosing to be happy and enjoy how good I'm feeling ATM!! I am a little worried because I'm feeling so good, but I am reminding myself often that I felt the same with DS. But yes, @katie121209, I do check the TP and underwear. Every. Time.

Questions? None

GTKY: Who is your celebrity doppelgänger? No clue!

profmcgonagall · October 2017

1. 4+2 according to LMP
2. I go in next Thursday to verify pregnancy
3.Physically I’m ok so far
4. Emotionally I’m struggling. A girl I know just had a miscarriage and I’m so afraid something will happen to me as well. I know it’s not contagious but it’s so hard not to stress.
5. None at this time

GTKY: no idea

zamoraspin · October 2017

How far along are you 4w

Any appointments coming up? Nope.

How are you feeling physically? Feeling fine physically. Would not mind some symptoms... my boobs are big but I keep attributing that to the progesterone I'm on.

How are you feeling emotionally? (Dear diary posts and venting are welcome and encouraged here) Feeling good still. I do need regular reassurance that I am pregnant, so I have pictures on my phone of my HPTs... it's a bit weird but it calms me down if I start to worry.

Questions? Do we have any STM mom's who have been PGAL before and can share their coping mechanisms?

GTKY: Who is your celebrity doppelgänger? Hmm, I don't know that I look that much like her but a couple people have said Sandra Bullock.

ChloandCoco · October 2017

How far along are you 4w2d

Any appointments coming up? BW today (results tomorrow, I'm hoping for a beta of 82 or higher). Then next Wednesday I have my final beta just to make sure the number is still rising.

How are you feeling physically? Other than bloating, I don't have any symptoms, but I know it's still early. I should start feeling nauseous next week.

How are you feeling emotionally? (Dear diary posts and venting are welcome and encouraged here) Emotionally I'm doing better than I thought I would be. I find it really helps that I still have HPTs to use, except that today used my last FRER (the line is nice and dark). I'm going to switch over to my internet cheapies HPTs (I have 15 left, so I'm hoping to see a nice progression).

Questions? Should we include a milestone question to this thread? Or would you feel like it causes too much anxiety?

GTKY: Who is your celebrity doppelgänger? Kate Middleton

doxiemoxie212 · October 2017

How far along are you? 7+4

Any appointments coming up? First ultrasound on 10/25

How are you feeling physically? Fine. Few symptoms still.

How are you feeling emotionally? (Dear diary posts and venting are welcome and encouraged here) I feel pretty good, honestly. The first few weeks I was worried about something bad happening, but now I feel more accepting. Like, what's going to be will be, and I'll deal with anything as it comes.

Questions?

GTKY: Who is your celebrity doppelgänger? Does anyone remember Rachael Leigh Cook? She's closest. Some people tell me Natalie Portman or Kiera Knightly, but I don't agree with that at all (and I don't think they look like one another, so...)

jsl82 · October 2017

@zamora_spin this baby will hopefully be my golden baby (a baby born after a rainbow baby). I wish I could say that there were any coping mechanisms that worked for me last time, but I was anxious my entire pregnancy. I never allowed my husband to tag me in facebook for any of the pregnancy posts. I untagged myself from anything pregnancy related that others tagged me in and in general did not want to share the news. I did have an at home doppler that I am waiting ever so impatiently to break out again this pregnancy. Being able to hear the hearbeat daily helped (even after I could feel kicks).

I saw a few youtube videos for PGAL meditations- but they didn't help ease my fears (did help soothe my immediate stress though). Some people have mantras they repeat ("I am worthy of a happy healthy pregnancy", "I trust my body", ect). Try a few out and see what works for you. This time I keep telling myself that I am getting my babies back (I had 2 miscarriages before I had DD).

How far along are you
7w1d

Any appointments coming up?
Next Thursday

How are you feeling physically?
Crappy. I had a cold last week and I'm still congested. I am nauseous too and trying to find some comfort in that (it's hard though).

How are you feeling emotionally? (Dear diary posts and venting are welcome and encouraged here)
Anxiety is at a 7.5 out of 10 right now. I had a cold when I lost my first... so I'm scared what being sick so early in my pregnancy could have done. I also lost my previous pregnancies at 8 weeks and 10 weeks... so my trigger weeks are coming up, I'm expecting my anxiety to rise over the next month.

Questions?

GTKY: Who is your celebrity doppelgänger? Amanda Peet

silvergreen · October 2017

How far along are you?
6w6d

Any appointments coming up?

Tomorrow! Honestly can't wait for another check just to make sure everything is nice and closed up there due to my on and off pelvic pressure. Keep feeling like something's going to fall out.

How are you feeling physically?
Uncomfortable pelvic pressure on and off since week 4. I know this is probably a good sign that things are progressing in there (didn't have this with my MMC), but can't help worrying. Almost like it'll give me the urge to bear down.

How are you feeling emotionally? (Dear diary posts and venting are welcome and encouraged here)

Can't seem to fend off the anxiety. I thought it would get better with time, but I'm feeling more anxious as time goes on. I may feel differently once I have my first scan. I don't have one until 10w but I might ask for one sooner. My last pregnancy didn't grow bigger than 6w2d so I'm really eager to know where this little squirrel is at now. Progesterone only went up 1 point over a week to a total of 12. They keep telling me that if it's going in the right direction then that's reassuring, so I'm trying hard not to dwell on it.

Questions?
Seconding the question by @zamora_spin - I feel a lot better when I hear from other women who have welcomed a rainbow baby.

GTKY: Who is your celebrity doppelgänger?
None that I know of. Someone once sent me a picture of a girl drinking beer that looked exactly like me (but I don't drink beer and it definitely wasn't me, lol).

ETA: words.

fantasticmrsfox · October 2017

@zamora_spin
My 2nd pregnancy was a loss, then I got pregnant with DS2 a month later. It really does change the whole pregnancy. I think reminding myself every day “I’m still pregnant today” helped. Also I’m religious, so I had a different perspective on my pregnancy, that I was going to be thankful for as long as God gave us with the baby, but I was holding it with an open hand. I had to be ready at any point in the pregnancy to give him up. Hard but trusting that God is good and loves me helped me have peace!

How far along are you

I believe I’m 3+6

Any appointments coming up?

Had a blood test to confirm pregnancy today, woohoo!
in two weeks I have a prenatal interview (aka don’t eat these things and take your vitamin). Ultrasound will be after 6.5 weeks

How are you feeling physically?
Fine! (I’m ready to start feeling nauseous, I usually get nauseous around 8 weeks so I’m ready for that just to have that reassurance.

How are you feeling emotionally? (Dear diary posts and venting are welcome and encouraged here)

A little nervous but really pretty optimistic. Excited and ready to tell a few people!

Questions?
is anyone working out still? I have been consistently for the last 10 months but now I’m scared to because when I miscarried before I had been doing a pretty rigorous workout program. I’m just scared it had something to do with it.

GTKY: Who is your celebrity doppelgänger?
idk?!

ETA a question

reikotxm · October 2017

How far along are you 6+1

Any appointments coming up? Nov 2nd

How are you feeling physically? First the itchy throat kicked in, I kept drinking water and some caffine free tea with honey and lemon to help with the sore throat which is better. But now the cold portion of this sickness has kicked in and my nose is starting to feel a bit raw

How are you feeling emotionally? (Dear diary posts and venting are welcome and encouraged here) A bit paranoid. I had a MMC at 20 weeks and every little tweak or whatever I feel in my lower abdomen I get scared. I'm just waiting for that first appointment and hoping to see everything looking ok.

Questions? I want to get a doppler this time around so I can check once I hit the second tri... any suggestions on which one?

GTKY: Who is your celebrity doppelgänger? Hmm, not sure...

jsl82 · October 2017

@reikotxm I have the Sonoline b fetal doppler (amazon link below). I will say that my doctor knew I had it and was using it daily (she was amazing with dealing with my pgal brain) and you cannot be sitting up or have your knees bent when you are looking for the heartbeat. When you are sitting up or bending your knees you change the position of your uterus. This makes it hard for women to find the HB themselves. My DH found the HB super fast every time... I almost never found it myself. It can cause you to freak out if you are looking for it and can't find it, but that doesn't mean it's not there.... might just not be at an area that you can reach easily. Also the dopplers are not as strong as the one's the in the doctors office so it won't sound as loud. If either of those issues will cause you more panic than comfort I wouldn't suggest. It made me feel better, but it might make others uncomfortable.

Other tips- it comes with jelly- but you can also use aloe vera. It will not work without the gel.

https://www.amazon.com/SonoLine-Heartbeat-Monitor-Listening-BabyDoppler/dp/B073WKDT2H/ref=sr_1_1_a_it?ie=UTF8&qid=1508353950&sr=8-1&keywords=sonoline+b+fetal+doppler

bkrahn · October 2017

1. 7+1

2. Waiting for a phone call to shedule our first ultrasound

3. I've found as long as I eat a snack immediately before going to bed, I can make it through the morning without puking up my breakfast.. but the nausea is still very real. Stretching in my pelvic area.

3. I still feel too paranoid to do anything most days. I had my last round of betas last week, which were nice & high.. but now I have nothing scheduled until our ultrasound and that leaves me nervous. I made myself stop POAS, so now I don't have anything to reassure me other than my symptoms. It feels good to be past my milestone though. this weekend we told my husband's family about the baby and they weren't excited or supportive, so that also leaves me with a lot of anxiety. Trying to just enjoy each day and be thankful for each day I have with this little one.

4. None.

5. I have noo idea!

fantasticmrsfox · October 2017

@bkrahn so sorry YH family wasn’t supportive.

you and YH are the parents and I’m sure baby is already loved so much by you! Hope you have support elsewhere! *creepyinternethugs*

bkrahn · October 2017

@fantasticmrsfox thanks girl. Everyone else has been SO excited and supportive so far, but it still sucks knowing those 4 people aren't

I just have to keep reminding myself of how loved this baby is by others, otherwise I get pretty bummed out

silvergreen · October 2017

@bkrahn WTF? Sorry to hear that... I kind of felt the same way the time I announced my first pregnancy that ended in a MMC in April. First thing my MIL said to me after "congrats" was that she wished we had waited until she was done looking after her daughter's kid on the other coast. She's their live-in nanny due to their poor planning (military doctors). Now my SIL is pregnant again...due in March. Not going to bother sharing until much later, as long as everything goes well.

katie121209 · October 2017

@reikotxm I want to get a Doppler also!
@silvergreen what's up with people telling when you having a baby is most convenient for them :::insert eye roll:::

bkrahn · October 2017

@silvergreen oh man, that's so annoying! I don't get how hard it is to just say "congrats" and leave it at that.. why voice your opinion?

silvergreen · October 2017

@katie121209 @bkrahn

THANK YOU!! My poor DH has had to hear me b*tch about how our lives shouldn't take a backseat to anyone. He's in total agreement and thought her comments were completely tactless.

I honestly don't really have a great idea of when to reveal it to his family. I might not even bother unless someone notices my body changing, and as I'm chubby that might be a while, lol!

bkrahn · October 2017

@silvergreen I feel ya! Last time we never got around to telling BIL & SIL about our pregnancy before we lost it.. and this time MIL was SO insistent we tell them right away. but like, if you're not going to be genuinely happy for us & supportive, why should I bother telling you? I don't need you raining on my parade and stressin me out!

zamoraspin · October 2017

@jsl82 Thank you for the suggestions and for sharing your experiences. I am definitely interested in a Doppler when I’m far enough along. Hoping for the best for you and your golden baby.
@fantasticmrsfox Thank you for sharing. I am so glad that your faith has helped you find comfort.
I am going to look into meditations and think about some mantras. I’m sorry everyone in this thread has experienced loss but it is such an honor to share this journey with you all.

icecubeinthedesert · October 2017

I feel so behind today! TB wouldn't let me post or love-tit all day. I was signed in, but my mobile app and browser looked like I wasn't signed in and didn't have an option to sign in. Still won't work on anything other than my home laptop, so I may not be as active as usual.

@katie121209 I'm right there with you checking the TP every time I go to the bathroom. I might even go to the bathroom just to check, especially when I was having a lot of cramping and CM together. Way to stress me out, body!

@PatientlyWaiting10, good luck tomorrow!

@zamora_spin, FWIW, I didn't really have many symptoms until this week (nausea). Cramping creeped in around 4.5 I think?

How far along are you? 5 weeks

Any appointments coming up? Appointment Monday 10/23

How are you feeling physically? Nausea/queasiness has started to set in more than with my last two pregnancies, cramping has mostly subsided. I'm SOOOOO tired today, but I've been averaging about 5-6 hours of sleep a night since my BFP, so probably starting to catch up with me.

How are you feeling emotionally? (Dear diary posts and venting are welcome and encouraged here) Much better this week than last week. I'm trying to consciously step back from work stress. I still have a long ways to go until I'm past my milestones though.

Questions? Not this week.

GTKY: Who is your celebrity doppelgänger? Claire Danes if I have to pick someone. But I'm not sure if I have a good doppelganger.

40momma · October 2017

Hi ladies, I'm a bit late to the check in as I've been lurking for a few days. You know that feeling where you think you are going to jinx yourself if you join a board.... I know, I have to get these crazy thoughts out of my head and I figured you ladies would definitely understand! I recognize a few names on here from TTCAL which is great. I've had 2 prior losses and I'm really counting on 'third times a charm'

How far along are you 5w2d and every single day now feels like FOREVER

Any appointments coming up? I had my initial check in yesterday with OBGYN. He said my previous bloodworm looks great, we tried to do an abdominal u/s but he could;t see much. He saw the cyst (he said very normal) and he could see a bit of something but as I was only 5w1d there would;t be much to see yet. I'm going for another u/s on Friday Oct 27th. He said we will start with abdominal but if we still can't see anything we'll do transvaginal then. I don;t know how I;m going to make it to next Friday

How are you feeling physically? I truly wish I was feeling worse. I haven't had any nausea. I've had mildly sore boobs but not all the time, vivid dreams and last night I could smell DH's beer from across the room. I didn't realize that was a pg symptom but DH did. He started laughing as he was listening to some comedian last week joking about how airports shouldn't hire drug sniffing dogs, they should just hire pg women, they could smell a drugs from miles away.

How are you feeling emotionally? I've been doing fairly well but today I'm pretty anxious. My second loss happened at 5w3d and today I'm 5w2d so I'm sure I'm going to be bsc tomorrow.

Questions? hmm, I probably have a bazillion questions but none off the top of my head right now

GTKY: Who is your celebrity doppelgänger? I'd love to say Mandy Moore in her early years in This Is Us hahaha but lately I feel more like when she's old!

zamoraspin · October 2017

@40wife I found a good mantra today re jinxing things - Hope does not make bad things happen. You cannot jinx your pregnancy by creating a ticker, getting excited, or telling someone. Live in the positive!

icecubeinthedesert · October 2017

@zamora_spin, I've been taking on that philosophy as well. I even started to educate myself on car seats and strollers yesterday after reading the threads here. I can't really jinx myself. I probably won't buy anything just yet, but I can start getting ideas in my head.

40momma · October 2017

Thanks @zamora_spin, I had someone on other board say to me - pregnant until proven otherwise, which I love. I've been repeating in my head over and over again.
(You tagged the wrong 40bumpie

)

zamoraspin · October 2017

@40momma D'oh! I swear I have bumped before.

bkrahn · October 2017

These pelvic stretching cramps are getting pretty old and always kind of worry me. Broke down, POAS as we speak.

ChloandCoco · October 2017

@bkrahn I'm having a lot of mild cramping and I keep telling myself that every time it happens the baby is getting bigger. Sometimes it helps, and other times not so much. Drinking lots of water helps.

fantasticmrsfox · October 2017

@bkrahn and @ChloandCoco the cramps are what scare me the most

I was up at 4:30 the other night anxious about it.

PatientlyWaiting10 · October 2017

@bkrahn, @ChloandCoco, @fantasticmrsfox I seem to have worse cramps when I have to poop because almost immediately I feel better. Are you constipated? You could chalk them up to that too!! But yes, totally agree...they are NO fun!

fantasticmrsfox · October 2017

@PatientlyWaiting10 I’ve noticed that a bit too!

tammy574 · October 2017

How far along are you 6+2

Any appointments coming up? I had one today and had my scan and it’s perfect so far! Measuring exactly right at 6+2. I can’t believe it.

How are you feeling physically?
Tired and sore boobs.

How are you feeling emotionally? (Dear diary posts and venting are welcome and encouraged here)

Now that I’ve seen this bean and everything is ok so far I feel like I have a whole new onslaught of emotions! I still feel somewhat detached and I still feel very guarded but I feel pregnant finally. Like ok I really am. I really am. Gahhhhhhh. Pregnant after loss is just so hard because there isn’t the same secure feelings and it changes everything.

Questions? no

GTKY: Who is your celebrity doppelgänger?

Mila Kunis AALLL the way!!

bkrahn · October 2017

@ChloandCoco @fantasticmrsfox makes me feel a bit better knowing I'm not alone in this!
And yes @PatientlyWaiting10 i think that might be the case! Usually my morning cup of coffee seems to get things moving, but I haven't been able to stand coffee these past few days

might have to take one for the team..

zamoraspin · October 2017

@tammy574 Yes! So happy for your good scan!

profmcgonagall · October 2017

@bkrahn , I’ve been having cramping as well and scares the hell out of me. I also POAS today and took a picture so I can keep reassuring myself that I am pregnant until someone tells me otherwise.

bkrahn · October 2017

@profmcgonagall ugh, PGAL brain plays some mean tricks

zamoraspin · October 2017

TW My first loss was a blighted ovum. My hCG rose but didn’t double as quickly as it should have. I have found mixed stuff on whether some women experience normal hCG rise and still have a blighted ovum. Y’all, can anyone tell me something to make me stop googling blighted ovum and hCG rise? End TW

kbrown2385 · October 2017

Anyone feeling like this pregnancy is just one major mindf***? I feel great for a few days, poas because I’m paranoid and then the next couple of days my body decides it’s just kidding and it will act pregnant. It’s a vicious cycle. Just let me be miserable already.

profmcgonagall · October 2017

@zamora_spin, I found a list of mantras that was posted a long time ago on the bump. I tell them to myself every day and it does help a little.
- Today I am pregnant and I love my baby
- I am pregnant until someone tells me otherwise
- My past pregnancies do not dictact this one. Just because I’ve had a loss/es in the past, does not mean this pregnancy will end in loss.
Idk what to say to tell you to stop googling because honestly I’ve POAS every couple days and took a picture of the test just to make myself feel better.

@kbrown2385, I think I’m too early to have symptoms yet but I’m also wishing for them. Hope you start permanently feeling like crap soon ;-)

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