***This thread has a general trigger warning.***
This
thread is a safe place for members to discuss their mental health,
struggles, and successes while on the TTGP Board. This post can be
replied to at any time during the month. Not limited to those with a
mental health diagnosis, but please be sensitive to others. We will attempt to be as
flame free as possible!
Feel
free to share, vent, or support other members on this thread. Share a
picture/gif that expresses how you feel or provides some comfort.
If you need help getting started, try filling out the form below:
Mental Health Diagnosis (if you have been) or What brings you to this thread today?:
Status (WTO/TWW/Benched/TTA):
How are you feeling?
Where
are you in your mental health journey? (in treatment, looking for
support, on meds, in counseling, having a rough day, etc.)
Re: Mental Health Check-in for the First Half of October
Status (WTO/TWW/Benched/TTA): TWW
How are you feeling?: Meh... It's nearing the end of the TWW, my beta is scheduled for Wed and I'm still getting BFNs on HPTs. I know this is only the first cycle we are trying this round (we've been trying on and off for 4 years) but it was our last sperm sample we have and if it doesn't happen this month, it almost feels like we're starting over.
Where are you in your mental health journey? (in treatment, looking for support, on meds, in counseling, having a rough day, etc.) I'm in counseling and on meds. I have been for almost a year. Our flight home got cancelled yesterday so I had to cancel my therapy appointment today. It was rescheduled to a week from now, which will be good because I'll know for sure if this round worked or not. Just feeling blah
Married: May 2013
TTC #1 Since: June 2013
IUI 1-6: BFN
IUI 7: TWW
@darkstar42 Thanks for getting this thread posted....It popped up at a good time
AFM...
Mental Health Diagnosis: Anxiety/Depression
Status (WTO/TWW/Benched/TTA): TWW and then benched if it's not our cycle
How are you feeling? I'm feeling a little bit better than last month honestly. I have an appointment on the books for the 16th. I really hope that I can make some progress, and possible start medication for at least my anxiety issues/panic attacks. I'm going to ask about a therapy referral too. I've never tried it, but i'm willing to see if it will help. Though talking to a strangers about myself seems a bit weird, and off putting.
Where are you in your mental health journey? See above
AFM...
Mental Health Diagnosis (if you have been) or What brings you to this thread today?: Anxiety and situational depression. The anxiety has been there for the last few years but the situational depression is from TW losing my daughter shortly after birth in December end TW.
Status (WTO/TWW/Benched/TTA): TWW. Holla!
How are you feeling? ABout TTGP? Much better. The last few months I have been down in the dumps every BFN because I thought by controlling the situation I would make it happen. NOT HAPPENING. I really let go this cycle. Just because I am "supposed" to have a baby doesn't mean its going to happen when I want to to fill some imaginary void. So, as of now I am feeling ok.
Where are you in your mental health journey? (in treatment, looking for support, on meds, in counseling, having a rough day, etc.) I am incredibly emotional pre AF and its showing today. Everything is harder than it needs to be and making me mad. I did Upper fix today while yelling out loud how much I hate scissor crunches (SERIOUSLY EFF THEM). Overall, I was on meds after my loss for about 8 months and went of to TTGP because TW there is a stupid small increased chance of heart defects which is what was wrong with my daughter end TW so I just couldn't keep it up during this time. I was also seeing a therapist, but am no longer. I totally found that there are moments now, off meds, that I start to spiral, and recognize that I didn't do that before when on meds, and so I can tell myself.."ok, that's the anxiety. No your husband doesn't hate your cooking and has been lying to you for years to make you feel better. No calm down." lol. Its been great being able to identify and use self talk in those moments rather than give in.
Status (WTO/TWW/Benched/TTA): WTO
How are you feeling? Good, this month. We are trying some new treatment for the first time, so I feel hopeful. Overall the past two years of TTC have been very challenging for me, mental-health-wise, however. I've seriously considered going back into therapy again, but I did not find therapy that helpful when I've been in it previously. (I think therapy can be very helpful, but my therapists were not very good.)
Where are you in your mental health journey? (in treatment, looking for support, on meds, in counseling, having a rough day, etc.) I've struggled with depression all my life (seriously remember being depressed as a 10 year old), but hit a crisis point (escalating self-harm and a suicide attempt) in my early twenties that led to me seeking professional help (AKA my then-bf now-hubby gave me an ultimatum that I had to). I was in therapy and on a few different meds for a while, ultimately on one antidepressant for about a year before I decided to stop going to therapy and weaned myself off the drug. That was super rough. In the short term, it had been very helpful and I absolutely needed it at that point. But at least for me, antidepressants were not a long-term solution. So the past decade has been a journey for me in self-help and slowly learning healthy coping mechanisms that will work for me. Reading The Depression Cure was life-changing for me - the chapter on recognizing and halting rumination in its path, alone, has been the single greatest step I took toward emotional health. Now in my early thirties, I have good and bad days/weeks, and especially have had setbacks with all of the stress and grief of 2 years of infertility, but overall I know what I need to do to take care of myself and I am emotionally stronger and more content now than I've ever been and that feels wonderful. So I guess I just wanted to post here as a reminder to myself, for when I'm back in the hole, and for anyone else who is down in the hole right now themselves....you will get out of it. It WILL get better. It takes time...and you'll fall back in it again...but you'll get out of it again, too.
I have a question: Has anyone joined an IRL support group for infertility, or for mental health or other issues? I've never tried group therapy or a support group before...curious if anyone who has would be willing to share if they thought it was helpful or not.
I have have been on both sides of group therapy- as a group member and as a facilitator. As with individual therapy, it really depends on the culture of of the group as to how it goes. I’ve been in groups that I learned more creative ways to harm myself and more disordered eating behaviors than anything helpful. I’ve been in groups that are mainly for everybody venting. I’ve been in groups where it is an open conversation, facilitated by a therapist, though focused on relevant topics and is a supportive/non-judgemental, encouraging environment to grow and sustain change. (Holy run-on sentence, Batman!). If you have any specific questions, feel free to PM me!!
ETA: Regardless of the overall group culture, one great thing about group therapy or support is recognizing that you are not alone, and that others are going through similar things, too. The power of human connection can be so peaceful to the hurting heart.