NBR... when did you guys transition your first into a toddler bed? (if you have already) Was it an easy transition? A battle? Any tips or tricks? And I know all kiddos are different and it depends if they are ready but I thought I would hear other people's experiences too!
@kbrinks2 I transitioned both of mine early (20ish mo old). They were rolling around and waking up hitting their heads. Both of mine Wanted space! I had no issues… Spent maybe 20 minutes putting my son back in his bed on the first night. But it wasn't bad. Just keep putting them in bed. They sleep so much better in bigger beds (we transitioned straight to a full-size bed). Good luck!
@kbrinks2 I transitioned my daughter when she was 2y2m when she started climbing out. I just took the side of her crib and got her some new bedding. I put a pool noodle under the fired sheet so she wouldn't fall out. It took a few nights of just wordlessly putting her back to bed but it was no big deal.
I transitioned DS1 at 15 months when he started climbing out. I do not recommend, it was horrible. He was too young to really get it so he would climb under the fired sheet and get stuck and cry. I ended up having to sew his sheet to the mattress and stitch rip it off every couple of days to wash it. Then he would get his mattress if any push it around the room, I ended up having to cut holes in the mattress and the is to the bed. What a go ahead
Moral of the story, if you don't absolutely have to, later when they can understand is better. DS 2 is still in a crib with no thoughts of escaping (2y4m)
DD born Oct 2011 - DS#1 born Jan 2014 - DS#2 born Apr 2015 - DS#3 born Sept 2016 - LO#5 due Feb 7, 2018
Thank you @Starynightsky24 and @sabriel1! My husband really wanted to "try" him in a big boy bed since he would actually sleep on a mat at daycare. (22 mos) Well we tried it and he actually didn't get out of bed once! I was so surprised!! He's been a great sleeper but I was so worried that we would be chasing him around the house! The crib is still in his room just in case it doesn't work out! He is a pretty wild kid but has always been an awesome sleeper! So fingers crossed it works out! It will be an easier transition when the baby comes!
@kbrinks2, I am glad it is working well for you. We transitioned my son at 19 months. He started climbing out of his crib at 11 months, before he could even walk. We used some methods to keep him in longer (turning the crib, wearing a sleep sack) and they worked well, but my son just hated his crib. I think he was claustrophobic when he was younger. He is much better now that his is 5, but he would get so scared if we were in any small room with the door closed. The toddler bed made a huge difference for him and he did great with it. He stayed in him bed really well, even though he still was not sleeping through the night (that was a whole nother issue). I almost think it is easier switching earlier than later from the stories I have heard and read, but that is all completely anecdotal.
Thanks @lainikins!! It's been much better than I could have ever imagined.(**knock on wood). We were a bit concerned about nap time yesterday. He whined for a few minutes when we put him down but did not get out of bed. He fell asleep and slept almost 3 hours! Last night it was the same thing; we put him down, he whined for a few minutes but didn't leave his bed. He woke up about 7 this morning, grabbed the stuffed animals he could reach without leaving his bed and played for a few minutes. When he was ready to get up he just yelled "out" and waited for us to come into the room before he got out of bed!
Have any of you had a traumatic birth experience in the past? I had a forceps delivery after a prolonged labor and (very) prolonged pushing stage with my first, with bad tearing and a very difficult recovery. I'm naturally dealing with some anxiety about delivery with my second... wondering how others are dealing with their anxieties after things may have gone totally unplanned with previous deliveries.
@psm2462 I'm sorry you went through all that, I completely understand how you'd have anxiety about the next delivery. Have you talked to your OB about it?
My DD's delivery was also really traumatic. I had terrible back labor because she was sunny side up, and was also angled wrong so every contraction was shoving her into my spine instead of down my birth canal. My whole delivery team was amazing and tried everything they could to help me have a vaginal birth, but after the epidural came out twice and four hours of pushing with zero descent DD was showing signs of distress and I was in so much pain I couldn't even participate in the laboring anymore. I ended up with an emergency C-section. Honestly at that point I was just happy for the numbing the spinal gave me and that they got her out safely.
Recovery was no walk in the park, but not nearly as terrible as the labor experience. I'm pretty certain I'm just going to schedule a repeat C-section this time, as the idea of not knowing whether I can successfully do a VBAC and going through all that again just to have another emergency C-section is terrifying. My anxiety is actually that I'll go into labor before the scheduled C-section. I just don't want to have anything to do with that again. So that's the possibility I have to mentally prepare myself for. I find it helps to talk through my fears and uncertainties with my OB helps.
@precious88 thanks for your response! Sounds like you had a really difficult time as well My saving grace that didn't lead to emergency C is that DS wasn't showing signs of distress so I was able to continue to push long enough to get him to move down just enough that forceps were an option. In retrospect, I'm not sure it was the best decision given my recovery and question whether a C would have been a wiser decision. That's part of my anxiety, I think -- not being able to look back and say that I did or didn't make the right decision, and not necessarily knowing what I'd do if I were in the same situation again. If I were you, I think I'd probably go for a repeat c-section, too -- the tremendous unknown after what you've been through would be a huge source of anxiety for me. I will cross my fingers you don't go into labor before it's scheduled -- how early does your OB recommend scheduling it before your due date?
I actually changed providers since my first delivery (not related to my birth experience, but for myriad other reasons), but although my current provider wasn't part of my previous delivery, she has been tremendously supportive and helpful at assuaging my fears. I'll keep the conversation going with her throughout my pregnancy to make sure she's well aware of my concerns.
@psm2462 Thank you My OB doesn't recommend going past 39 weeks. Cooking baby too long after a C-section can lead to major complications that I don't want any part of. I'm kind of relieved I only have to go to 39 weeks this time anyways- last time I was almost 42 weeks haha. I was pregnant forEVER.
I hope we both have much better birthing experiences this pregnancy. Having a supportive provider makes all the difference, it's great you're with someone you feel comfortable with.
Mine was not what I planned (which I think happens lots) but I went in when my water broke. I wasn't feeling contractions but they said they were about 6 minutes apart. They said apparently my water didn't completely break even though I had been (TMI) leaking for a couple of hours. They ended up having to give me some pitocin to kick start my contractions. Well it kicked in quick! I wasn't sure if I wanted an epidural or not before going in and I was about half hour in and they were awful and I opted for one! I also had Back labour because baby was sunny side up and also his head was tilted so he would not decend. I laboured at the hospital for about 12 hours and tried pushing and he was just not coming out. So I ended up in a csection and recovery wasn't great but it also wasn't horrible! The hardest part was just getting myself up from a laying down position!
With this baby I am thinking I will try a VBAC depending on what the OB says. I won't see an OB for a bit so I will see what they have to say too! I was also thinking now that I know how a repeat csection works and it would be a bit nicer than labouring for 12+ hours and then having a csection anyways.
I am also nervous about dealing with a toddler if I end up with a csection. I won't be able to left him which seems like it would be a problem!!
But we also have no family close by and all of our friends work so we also thought a scheduled csection would be convenient so that we have someone to watch him (unless I go into labour before the csection date).
Too many options!! (Thanks for listening to my rant!)
@kbrinks2 I have a toddler, too, DD will be 23 months when baby is born. I have the same concerns about caring for her post C-section. When I had my DD's unexpected C-section, my MIL came down for 4 weeks after DH went back to work. She already offered to come down for 6 weeks after this baby to take care of DD. I also am looking at local daycares because if anything happens and MIL can't come down we're putting DD in daycare while DH is at work for a month or two while I recover.
Hopefully you have someone who can come down and help? If not one person the whole time, maybe a few people who can come one after the other?
@psm2462 though my experience was quite different, it was also traumatic and I am having the same difficulties now with anxiety. I had an emergency c-section (at best atypical pre-eclampsia, at worst, suspected HELLP Syndrome) and long story short, I had a massive PPH that landed me in intensive care. My little boy also wound up in NICU with respiratory distress.
This pregnancy I basically raised my fears from the first appointment I had I had and asked what we could do to prevent this re-occurring and what back ups we could have so that if it does occur, we are prepared. Of course, nothing runs to plan with bringing a baby into the world and no one can make any guarantees, but I have found talking about and understanding the risks so helpful. Just talking even! And knowing that I have a team of people who are prepared and will do anything they can to mitigate those risks helps. Do you have the same carers? And are they people you trust who support what you want?
I will do a planned c-section this time I think with a senior consulting doctor and a vascular surgeon on hand in case of PPH and that is all I can do to minimize risk. Fingers crossed I have a better experience. And I hope you get the experience you want as well - best of luck
@kbrinks2 I have a toddler, too, DD will be 23 months when baby is born. I have the same concerns about caring for her post C-section. When I had my DD's unexpected C-section, my MIL came down for 4 weeks after DH went back to work. She already offered to come down for 6 weeks after this baby to take care of DD. I also am looking at local daycares because if anything happens and MIL can't come down we're putting DD in daycare while DH is at work for a month or two while I recover.
Hopefully you have someone who can come down and help? If not one person the whole time, maybe a few people who can come one after the other?
That is very nice that your MIL can come down! My family all lives about 28 hours away! My mom is planning on coming out with my dad but they will probably only stay for a week since they will have to both get back for work! All of our friends are teachers and will be working throughout the week and are off when my husband is off. So I am a little concerned as to what I am going to do when baby gets here
@kbrinks2 Perhaps your parents can come visit at staggered times? Like maybe your mom comes for one week, and your dad the next? If you husband can take off for the first week, that would get you through the first few weeks. I don't know about you, but for me the first couple weeks were the most difficult and after about three weeks I felt better unless I overdid it.
Even though my MIL will be here, I'm still concerned about not being able to pick up DD. My MIL has arthritis in her hands and I don't want her to overdo it. So I'm gradually teaching DD to do things more independently. We're going to transition to sitting at a toddler table/chair instead of a high chair and a toddler bed so she doesn't have to be picked up for those things. And I'm getting a little step stool so she can crawl up into the car and back down. DD will be almost 2, so I think these are realistic skills she can learn by then. How old will your toddler be?
Do any other STM+'s have any other ideas? Maybe someone who has had to take care of a small toddler before after having a c-section has some tips for us?
@precious88 That would be a good idea to have them stagger their visit but my mom isn't a fan of flying and likes when she has someone else to fly with. As long as this baby isn't too far overdue (my DS was 8 days overdue) then my husband will be off for a week with spring break (Teacher) which would be awesome!! We have also bought our DS a toddler bed and will try to transition him before then baby get here! Our DS will be 2 in November so it's definitely possible! I will just be spending a lot of time at home (not that I wanted to go anywhere with my last csection) and if it means laying down with son until he naps I might have to! I know we always manage, even if we don't think we can! It won't be easy but we will get through it!
Re: STM+ Check In 8/30
Was it an easy transition? A battle?
Any tips or tricks? And I know all kiddos are different and it depends if they are ready but I thought I would hear other people's experiences too!
I transitioned DS1 at 15 months when he started climbing out. I do not recommend, it was horrible. He was too young to really get it so he would climb under the fired sheet and get stuck and cry. I ended up having to sew his sheet to the mattress and stitch rip it off every couple of days to wash it. Then he would get his mattress if any push it around the room, I ended up having to cut holes in the mattress and the is to the bed. What a go ahead
Moral of the story, if you don't absolutely have to, later when they can understand is better. DS 2 is still in a crib with no thoughts of escaping (2y4m)
The crib is still in his room just in case it doesn't work out!
He is a pretty wild kid but has always been an awesome sleeper! So fingers crossed it works out! It will be an easier transition when the baby comes!
Last night it was the same thing; we put him down, he whined for a few minutes but didn't leave his bed. He woke up about 7 this morning, grabbed the stuffed animals he could reach without leaving his bed and played for a few minutes. When he was ready to get up he just yelled "out" and waited for us to come into the room before he got out of bed!
My DD's delivery was also really traumatic. I had terrible back labor because she was sunny side up, and was also angled wrong so every contraction was shoving her into my spine instead of down my birth canal. My whole delivery team was amazing and tried everything they could to help me have a vaginal birth, but after the epidural came out twice and four hours of pushing with zero descent DD was showing signs of distress and I was in so much pain I couldn't even participate in the laboring anymore. I ended up with an emergency C-section. Honestly at that point I was just happy for the numbing the spinal gave me and that they got her out safely.
Recovery was no walk in the park, but not nearly as terrible as the labor experience. I'm pretty certain I'm just going to schedule a repeat C-section this time, as the idea of not knowing whether I can successfully do a VBAC and going through all that again just to have another emergency C-section is terrifying. My anxiety is actually that I'll go into labor before the scheduled C-section. I just don't want to have anything to do with that again. So that's the possibility I have to mentally prepare myself for. I find it helps to talk through my fears and uncertainties with my OB helps.
I actually changed providers since my first delivery (not related to my birth experience, but for myriad other reasons), but although my current provider wasn't part of my previous delivery, she has been tremendously supportive and helpful at assuaging my fears. I'll keep the conversation going with her throughout my pregnancy to make sure she's well aware of my concerns.
I hope we both have much better birthing experiences this pregnancy. Having a supportive provider makes all the difference, it's great you're with someone you feel comfortable with.
With this baby I am thinking I will try a VBAC depending on what the OB says. I won't see an OB for a bit so I will see what they have to say too! I was also thinking now that I know how a repeat csection works and it would be a bit nicer than labouring for 12+ hours and then having a csection anyways.
I am also nervous about dealing with a toddler if I end up with a csection. I won't be able to left him which seems like it would be a problem!!
But we also have no family close by and all of our friends work so we also thought a scheduled csection would be convenient so that we have someone to watch him (unless I go into labour before the csection date).
Too many options!! (Thanks for listening to my rant!)
Hopefully you have someone who can come down and help? If not one person the whole time, maybe a few people who can come one after the other?
This pregnancy I basically raised my fears from the first appointment I had I had and asked what we could do to prevent this re-occurring and what back ups we could have so that if it does occur, we are prepared. Of course, nothing runs to plan with bringing a baby into the world and no one can make any guarantees, but I have found talking about and understanding the risks so helpful. Just talking even! And knowing that I have a team of people who are prepared and will do anything they can to mitigate those risks helps. Do you have the same carers? And are they people you trust who support what you want?
I will do a planned c-section this time I think with a senior consulting doctor and a vascular surgeon on hand in case of PPH and that is all I can do to minimize risk. Fingers crossed I have a better experience. And I hope you get the experience you want as well - best of luck
My family all lives about 28 hours away! My mom is planning on coming out with my dad but they will probably only stay for a week since they will have to both get back for work!
All of our friends are teachers and will be working throughout the week and are off when my husband is off. So I am a little concerned as to what I am going to do when baby gets here
Even though my MIL will be here, I'm still concerned about not being able to pick up DD. My MIL has arthritis in her hands and I don't want her to overdo it. So I'm gradually teaching DD to do things more independently. We're going to transition to sitting at a toddler table/chair instead of a high chair and a toddler bed so she doesn't have to be picked up for those things. And I'm getting a little step stool so she can crawl up into the car and back down. DD will be almost 2, so I think these are realistic skills she can learn by then. How old will your toddler be?
Do any other STM+'s have any other ideas? Maybe someone who has had to take care of a small toddler before after having a c-section has some tips for us?
That would be a good idea to have them stagger their visit but my mom isn't a fan of flying and likes when she has someone else to fly with. As long as this baby isn't too far overdue (my DS was 8 days overdue) then my husband will be off for a week with spring break (Teacher) which would be awesome!!
We have also bought our DS a toddler bed and will try to transition him before then baby get here! Our DS will be 2 in November so it's definitely possible! I will just be spending a lot of time at home (not that I wanted to go anywhere with my last csection) and if it means laying down with son until he naps I might have to!
I know we always manage, even if we don't think we can! It won't be easy but we will get through it!