I thought of one belatedly after the lovetit discussion last week. I HATE that loving a post is called a lovetit on the Bump! The term just drives me nuts.
Married May 2014 DD born August 2016 Baby #2 due December 2017
Dog strollers are idiotic. I drove up on one yesterday thinking "oh look a baby!" only to discover it was somebody's damn pupper as I passed by. I fail to see the point of taking your dog for a walk if, y'know, THEY DONT ACTUALLY WALK.
I HATE those ugly ugly ugly jammie's in the children's department that have Disney characters (or worse, Thomas the train) on them with glitter or puffy paint, etc. ugh. How will I make sure my children avoid this entire section when they're older and can pick out their clothes?! I know this is an UO.
Edited to add this picture: This is the stuff of nightmares.
@breezybee My 6 year old stepdaughter visited recently and all her pajamas were frilly pink and purple Disney princess night gowns. I wanted to gag lol. Plus they just looked uncomfortable to sleep in!
@breezybee Yes!!! I loathe character clothing/pj's. I am not looking forward to the day when DD starts asking for character clothes. My sweet aunt who loves all things Disney will buy DD all sorts of Minnie mouse clothes and I just hide them in the back of the closet (and feel bad about it. But not bad enough to actually dress her in them!)
@breezybee I hate that stuff too. Which is weird because I wore a LOT of it growing up. But then again I don't think our generation had much choice-- you had a character outfit, or fancy smocked rompers with nothing in between. There's so much cuter stuff out there now!
If I had to choose the lesser of two evils, I'd rather my kid have ugly character clothes than ugly character stuff in her room, because my OCD is off the charts and having everything not match will kill me.
@breezybee Agreeeee. Though I know for sure I had some Lion King apparel and Jasmine sheets as a kid. I'm really hoping we aren't gifted any character stuff for babies though. I want to hold off on that stuff until she actually asks for it!
On the subject of character clothing, it's such a weird dichotomy; I very much hate branded clothing, or pretty much anything with words or characters on it. I saw Disney character Easter Dresses in Target and was totally horrified. HOWEVER! My 2 year old daughter gets so much joy from seeing Minnie Mouse on her t-shirt (I use it as a back-up emergency shirt at daycare, because...Minnie Mouse). I can't explain tackiness to a toddler though, so we are in a weird holding pattern right now.
TLDR: I may eventually lose the Disney Character clothing battle, but will NEVER buy a Moana Easter Dress
My daughter is 3 and is just now getting into character themed stuff. She's obsessed with Paw Patrol and princess anything. I always swore that I would never buy that crap, but here I am with a toddler decked out in Frozen and Sleeping Beauty pjs. I don't buy the regular clothes for her to wear out of the house, but she gets excited with her disney/nick jr stuff at bedtime, and I go with it.
Momma to Amelia Marie (7/14) and Austin Samuel (11/17). Adding baby (girl) #3 on 7/21
A girl I went to HS with is due next week and has been complaining about it since Aug. 1st. It is for some reason popular with my group of FB friends to complain about pregnancy once you're near the end. I find it completely obnoxious. It's obviously one thing if you're having a difficult pregnancy and need to be on bed rest or something, but I'm talking about healthy women with healthy pregnancies, who are whining on social media saying something along the lines of "get this baby out of me." I know I'm a FTM so I could be super out of line with this thinking.. I don't know how it feels to be 40 weeks pregnant or a few days overdue or anything, but my PGAL attitude is totally bothered by the 9th month complaining.
Me: 33 DH: 34 Married: Oct 2015 TTC #1: Sept 2016 BFP: 10/19/16 ~ blighted ovum ~ D&C 11/23/16 BFP: 3/24/17 DD1 born 12/2/17 TTC #2: July 2018 BFP: 8/26/18 DD2 born 5/16/19
@peachy13 I get what you're saying, but I am honestly one of those women complaining about pregnancy.
Admittedly I have not had the healthiest pregnancy, but for me, this is hard. This is an IVF baby and I honestly thought once I got pregnant I'd be able to enjoy it, but I really haven't. From the overwhelming exhaustion to the heartburn, swelling, and otherwise crappy feeling, I am not a happy pregnant woman. (And that doesn't even include the severe pain and emergency surgery I went through.) I don't think that makes me any less excited for my son. I love my son, I have loved him from the moment I saw a picture of him as a five day embryo. I am over the moon excited to be his mom, and I cannot wait to meet him. I don't think any of that means that I should pretend this is easy or that I'm not struggling.
I don't say any of that to invalidate your feelings or opinion, because before I got pregnant that bugged me too. Wanting and wishing for something that someone else was complaining about when all I wanted to do was tell them how lucky they were, was infuriating. Being on this side of it though, I do see it differently.
That being said, I'm not posting any of that on social media, it's mainly to my friends and family who know what I've been through, so maybe you see that differently, I don't know.
Me: 30 DH: 31
2 Dogs / 2 Cats
IUI #1 07/2016 BFN
IUI #2 10/2016 BFN
IUI #3 11/2016 BFN IVF #1 03/2017 - 23 Retrieved / 22 Fertilized / 11 at Day 3 / 1 Beautiful Embryo tf on Day 5 / 7 Frozen on Day 6 - Beta #1 4/5/17: 104 Beta #2 4/7/17 224
@txmomma16 i'm really sorry you're having a tough pregnancy. And FWIW, it does make a total difference to me that you're not publicly complaining on social media, which is what I see with a lot of my pregnant FB friends, to the point where I find it really annoying. It's like they all had the best time ever posting their announcements and monthly bump pictures and nursery pictures, and then as soon as the end was near, it was daily posts of "ugh this sucks" and "get this thing out of me" which I eye-rolled about for sure. I know this is nothing close to what you're doing -- again, very sorry that pregnancy hasn't been great for you. Wishing you better days ahead
Me: 33 DH: 34 Married: Oct 2015 TTC #1: Sept 2016 BFP: 10/19/16 ~ blighted ovum ~ D&C 11/23/16 BFP: 3/24/17 DD1 born 12/2/17 TTC #2: July 2018 BFP: 8/26/18 DD2 born 5/16/19
peachy13 OH just you wait until the drive by "I am 37 weeks and SOOO over being pregnant, has anyone had luck with castor oil in the past!??! I NEED to get this baby outta me lolololol " Those are fun. You signed up for 40(+) weeks people!!!
I don't care if people complain about it here, because hello - misery loves company. But I agree with the constant public posts to no one in particular (I have an acquaintance that just did the same exact thing, thankfully she just had hers).
@elcd458 the horror of over the top character bedding! That's where I draw the line. Like @ameliabedelia-2 said, I swore I'd never buy character stuff, but DD loves Moana and one of her favorite tees is a Moana shirt. It makes her happy. Also MIL loves to shop for DD and I'm happy to let her do it. Although some of her choices are a bit eye-raising (lots of glitter and words) I just go with it since they're free and only worn for a season.
I guess my UO is that I love character clothing! Especially when DS1 gets so excited to wear something he recognizes
@txmomma16 big hugs! I feel the same way. You aren't alone. Just because we don't like pregnancy doesn't mean we don't appreciate or value that we are pregnant and love our babies. Pregnancy is hard!
@peachy13@flowerpower5838 I'd have to agree! I think there's just a lot of messaging out there that your last month of pregnancy is *literally the worst ever* so women just go along with it and over exaggerate how they're feeling sometimes. Personally, I never got to that point with DS so i can't relate. It's just so unnecessary to post about it regularly on SM. It's one thing to say something like that when someone asks you how you're feeling, another to share without prompting. Sounds like AWing to me.
AFM i hate it when strangers talk to my kid. They look right past me, and start talking to my 18 month old like they know him... and he's usually like "wtf strange person?" and they just stare at him waiting for a response, or for me to respond on his behalf. It's just so annoying and my introverted self gets really drained by it. Like... Can we go grocery shopping without having to interact with random strangers, please? I get it if he engages them first, but 99% of the time that's not the case.
I'm sure I will eat these words but I don't understand how the last few weeks of pregnancy can be worse than the beginning/middle symptoms. I'd rather be huge and generically uncomfortable than having gross headaches and puking coupled with the mental anguish of not having anything on my to-do list finished or knowing if something were to go wrong the baby isn't "big enough" to handle it yet. Maybe that's just me, though.
@ameliabedelia-2 - I like that "compromise" (as much as you can compromise with a toddler). You can wear whatever you want to bed, but those type of character-plaster outfits are "inside the house" clothes. Outside the house, we don't wear that stuff.
Like I said, as much as you can compromise and reason with a toddler.
** December BMB Siggy Challenge - Animals in Pools **
Me: 31+ H: 32 TTC Since 11/2015 #1 - MMC 6.5 weeks (2/16); #2 - MC due to cystic hygroma at 20 weeks (10/16); #3 CP (2/17); #4 - Due 12.16.17
Responding to the various posts above - I find myself having to distinguish for family (and myself, sometimes) my feelings of discomfort with daily symptoms from my very super duper real excitement that we are having a child. It is tough to hold in all the angst sometimes This is definitely the place to complain/ask questions in good company!
e.g., my gchat with my sister this morning: "I'm pretty sure I had some very slight nipple leakage last night now, to some people this might seem gross or inconvenient... I was sort of excited! Another sign that baby and body are progressing☺"
Guys, I feel like I'll be one of those people who is miserable the last few weeks of pregnancy. Mostly because everything has been a breeze so far for me (I honestly feel guilty for having such an easy go of it when I know so many women struggle) so once I'm actually enormous and probably have swelling feet and am being kicked in the bladder it will be worse than any of my experiences thus far. That said, I will not go to complain about it on SM, and I'll keep it to a minimum here (or maybe it won't be quite as bad as I'm imagining and I won't want to at all...who knows).
@kvacmak I read a blog post the other day about how this blogger decided to deal with strangers touching her kids! Like randos just coming up to them in the grocery store and...I don't even know, tousling their hair? pinching their cheeks? Excuse me, no!
I also have really strong mixed feelings about unprompted complaining during pregnancy. After spending years wishing, there's a big part of me that doesn't want to complain about any part of this. But all the same, there's some really inconvenient/weird stuff happening in my body that makes me grumpy at times. I appreciate having the BMB for complaining/questions/solidarity but I would not feel comfortable complaining on social media. I also feel like I'm getting off easy compared to others (thanks, BMB for the perspective!), and that others should do what it takes to get them through their own experiences.
I also find it pretty hard to believe that the last weeks of pregnancy will/would be worse for me than the process of getting the kiddo from the inside to the outside, and then recovering. (But I have no experience on this, so what do I know?) I just don't personally want to be like "get this baby outta me" followed immediately by "holy ****, I take that back!"
@peachy13 I was that person when pregnant with DD. I don't think I posted about it too much on social media, but anyone who asked me knew I was ready for baby to be out. You're huge, you're sore, it's hard to sleep, you pee all the time, you bump into stuff because you don't realize how big you are, baby kicks your ribs and punches your bladder/cervix, your skin sometimes feels like it is about to rip open it is stretched so far, and DD was due in August so I was also hella hot. I wanted her OUT, starting at about 37 weeks. Now, I am fortunate not to be PGAL (other than a possible CP before I got pregnant with DD), but even those who have experienced a loss should feel okay about not wanting to be pregnant anymore (or not really enjoying pregnancy even) and wanting to hold that little bundle! I told DD all the time towards the end "I want to feel you kick me on the outside--get out!"
@kyrwyn My recovery wasn't so bad and I never got to push (induction with cervadil--sucks--then pitocin, then hours of contractions, finally an epidural when the contractions were stacking too much, and DD wouldn't descend and I couldn't dilate past 4, so we did a c-section), but I never really regretted wanting her out. There were times when I missed feeling her with me moving all the time, but for the most part I was realllly glad it was over and she was here! It was a different kind of discomfort after, but I had no tearing (b/c c-section) and I was on pain meds at first, so it was still kind of a relief.
Married May 2014 DD born August 2016 Baby #2 due December 2017
I don't get when people get annoyed that the barista spells their name wrong (or some equally inconsequential time). God forbid you carry around that disposable cup with a misspelled name on it.
However, if you have written correspondence with someone where your name is right there (FB, email, etc) being annoyed makes sense. Once my own SIL (no longer my SIL now) spelled my name wrong while commenting on one of my FB posts. What?
Right after mc'd last year, one of my fb friends posted complaining about some pregnancy symptom and being a hormonal rollercoaster, I PM'd her and told her that she shouldn't complain bc I'd kill to still be having symptoms. I immediately regretted it and apologized, but have been very conscious about complaints since then.
@MJDsquared I'm with you on this one. My name is in my email address.. It's not hard to spell it correctly when it's right in front of you. I also don't complain when its spelled wrong on cups, to go orders, etc, and usually just tell them my name is Kat to avoid it. I'll still sometimes get Cat, but whatever. I love kitties
@MJDsquared ugh serious pet peeve of mine... like you can even copy and paste it for crying out loud! I get that ALL the time. Beyond frustrating. Part of the reason we chose a very basic name for DS because DH and I are constantly dealing with people misspelling or mispronouncing our first names and our last name is already 10 letters long and not super common.
I've got another one: what the eff is up with everyone being so obsessed with double sinks in the bathroom? I hate them! Guess who has to clean all of the sinks in my house? Me! Why do I need 2? It's not like people can't take turns using a freaking sink. I'd rather have the extra counter space! I feel like double sinks are the new granite countertops of the HGTV house hunters world. Like now it's just something people need without even wondering why they need it. UNNECESSARY!! lol can you tell I've been watching HGTV all afternoon?
I also love our double sinks! I do end up having to clean them both...DH is kind of worthless in that department. Also his gets sooo much grosser than mine. But after wishing for double sinks through three apartments I was so stoked to get them in our house! Haha.
I've just made it very clear to my husband that he needs to clean up after himself or he will DIE. I feel like if he had his own sink, he'd just leave it super messy all the time. Our new house has double sinks and I'm going to rip them out to make them one sink with a sit down vanity table.
I had bad symphysis pubis dysfunction with DD and it's starting even earlier this time. I was on bedrest at 28 weeks and by 34 weeks I was almost unable to walk. My doctor swept my membranes at 37.5 weeks to jumpstart labor because I was in such excruciating pain. I had to take leave from work early and was beyond miserable. I try not to judge what other women are experiencing, or assume they are overreacting. I didn't have much morning sickness so for me, the end of pregnancy is exponentially worse than the beginning. I don't know how much of it I put on fbook, but I certainly bitched to anyone that would listen.
Momma to Amelia Marie (7/14) and Austin Samuel (11/17). Adding baby (girl) #3 on 7/21
@breezybee Late, but I so hear you on the character stuff. It especially seems nauseating on the girls clothes where they put scratchy fabric and bedazzle the hell out of it. With DS, I tried to avoid all that, and we did for quite a while, but once I saw the joy on his face when he'd get his Thomas or Elmo jammies on, I couldn't help it. We did (and still) try to limit it to pajamas, but yeah. They sure do love them lol
@elcd458 I can't speak for anyone else, but for me the end of pregnancy was definitely harder than the beginning. I was lucky to only have mild nausea briefly with DS. However, by the end I was so sore with hip pain and tailbone pain that I could hardly sit, every sleeping position hurt or was uncomfortable. Because of all that work was miserable (sitting), and my sleep was really, really suffering. And I only made it to 36 weeks! So I guess it just depends on your overall experience. Mine went from easier to harder, but I can totally imagine those things seeming minor if you had debilitating morning sickness, etc. at the beginning. It's crazy how we all end up with such different symptoms/experiences with the same process.
It is so annoying when people ask me if I am still working or plan to continue working after the baby. Why don't they ever ask DH that? Why is it always assumed that if anyone should stop working it should be the woman?!
I for one, loved the end of my pregnancies. Yeah it had its down side (peeing constantly, or the dreaded head bash into your cervix which sends firey pains down your vagina).. but overall I liked the end. I liked the way I looked and the way my whole stomach moves while lying down. Which seriously is alien-like to watch.
Character clothes, are hit or miss. I don't like the frilly stuff or covered in glitter. But my girls absolutely love wearing their favorite character Tshirts. And I find that they are perfect for mud, markers, and the wear and tear of kid play. It saves their nicer clothes for when we leave the house. I hate shirts with phrases or terms that come off as sexist or rude .. like "Sassy" or "boys will be boys" or "girls rule boys drool" or "daddy's new boss... sorry mom".... the list goes on. Ugh. Just, no.
Re: UO Thursday 8/10
Married May 2014
DD born August 2016
Baby #2 due December 2017
I know this is an UO.
Edited to add this picture:
This is the stuff of nightmares.
@breezybee My 6 year old stepdaughter visited recently and all her pajamas were frilly pink and purple Disney princess night gowns. I wanted to gag lol. Plus they just looked uncomfortable to sleep in!
ETA forgot to include the mention
If I had to choose the lesser of two evils, I'd rather my kid have ugly character clothes than ugly character stuff in her room, because my OCD is off the charts and having everything not match will kill me.
DD - 12/28/17
TTC #2 3/2019
BFP 5/2019 || MC - D&C 5/2019
BFP 2/2020 || EDD 10/10/2020
TLDR: I may eventually lose the Disney Character clothing battle, but will NEVER buy a Moana Easter Dress
Married: Oct 2015
TTC #1: Sept 2016
BFP: 10/19/16 ~ blighted ovum ~ D&C 11/23/16
BFP: 3/24/17
TTC #2: July 2018
BFP: 8/26/18
Admittedly I have not had the healthiest pregnancy, but for me, this is hard. This is an IVF baby and I honestly thought once I got pregnant I'd be able to enjoy it, but I really haven't. From the overwhelming exhaustion to the heartburn, swelling, and otherwise crappy feeling, I am not a happy pregnant woman. (And that doesn't even include the severe pain and emergency surgery I went through.) I don't think that makes me any less excited for my son. I love my son, I have loved him from the moment I saw a picture of him as a five day embryo. I am over the moon excited to be his mom, and I cannot wait to meet him. I don't think any of that means that I should pretend this is easy or that I'm not struggling.
I don't say any of that to invalidate your feelings or opinion, because before I got pregnant that bugged me too. Wanting and wishing for something that someone else was complaining about when all I wanted to do was tell them how lucky they were, was infuriating. Being on this side of it though, I do see it differently.
That being said, I'm not posting any of that on social media, it's mainly to my friends and family who know what I've been through, so maybe you see that differently, I don't know.
2 Dogs / 2 Cats
IUI #2 10/2016 BFN
IUI #3 11/2016 BFN
IVF #1 03/2017 - 23 Retrieved / 22 Fertilized / 11 at Day 3 / 1 Beautiful Embryo tf on Day 5 / 7 Frozen on Day 6 - Beta #1 4/5/17: 104 Beta #2 4/7/17 224
Married: Oct 2015
TTC #1: Sept 2016
BFP: 10/19/16 ~ blighted ovum ~ D&C 11/23/16
BFP: 3/24/17
TTC #2: July 2018
BFP: 8/26/18
I don't care if people complain about it here, because hello - misery loves company. But I agree with the constant public posts to no one in particular (I have an acquaintance that just did the same exact thing, thankfully she just had hers).
Me: 29 DH: 31
Married 10/13/12
TTC Since 8/2016
Like @ameliabedelia-2 said, I swore I'd never buy character stuff, but DD loves Moana and one of her favorite tees is a Moana shirt. It makes her happy. Also MIL loves to shop for DD and I'm happy to let her do it. Although some of her choices are a bit eye-raising (lots of glitter and words) I just go with it since they're free and only worn for a season.
@txmomma16 big hugs! I feel the same way. You aren't alone. Just because we don't like pregnancy doesn't mean we don't appreciate or value that we are pregnant and love our babies. Pregnancy is hard!
DX Diminished Ovarian Reserve, Factor V Leiden Mutation, Secondary Infertility
MFI (SA #1Count 11mill, Motility: 18%, Morphology: 1%)
AMH .328 | FSH 13.2
Like I said, as much as you can compromise and reason with a toddler.
** December BMB Siggy Challenge - Animals in Pools **
Me: 31+ H: 32
TTC Since 11/2015
#1 - MMC 6.5 weeks (2/16); #2 - MC due to cystic hygroma at 20 weeks (10/16); #3 CP (2/17); #4 - Due 12.16.17
e.g., my gchat with my sister this morning: "I'm pretty sure I had some very slight nipple leakage last night now, to some people this might seem gross or inconvenient... I was sort of excited! Another sign that baby and body are progressing☺"
@kvacmak I read a blog post the other day about how this blogger decided to deal with strangers touching her kids! Like randos just coming up to them in the grocery store and...I don't even know, tousling their hair? pinching their cheeks? Excuse me, no!
DD - 12/28/17
TTC #2 3/2019
BFP 5/2019 || MC - D&C 5/2019
BFP 2/2020 || EDD 10/10/2020
I also find it pretty hard to believe that the last weeks of pregnancy will/would be worse for me than the process of getting the kiddo from the inside to the outside, and then recovering. (But I have no experience on this, so what do I know?) I just don't personally want to be like "get this baby outta me" followed immediately by "holy ****, I take that back!"
@kyrwyn My recovery wasn't so bad and I never got to push (induction with cervadil--sucks--then pitocin, then hours of contractions, finally an epidural when the contractions were stacking too much, and DD wouldn't descend and I couldn't dilate past 4, so we did a c-section), but I never really regretted wanting her out. There were times when I missed feeling her with me moving all the time, but for the most part I was realllly glad it was over and she was here! It was a different kind of discomfort after, but I had no tearing (b/c c-section) and I was on pain meds at first, so it was still kind of a relief.
Married May 2014
DD born August 2016
Baby #2 due December 2017
However, if you have written correspondence with someone where your name is right there (FB, email, etc) being annoyed makes sense. Once my own SIL (no longer my SIL now) spelled my name wrong while commenting on one of my FB posts. What?
DD - 12/28/17
TTC #2 3/2019
BFP 5/2019 || MC - D&C 5/2019
BFP 2/2020 || EDD 10/10/2020
Married 4/22/16
**TW**
BFP 2/1/16 I MC 3/21/16 (11w)
TTCAL 6/15/16
BFP 3/23/2017 Team pink! Quinn Leigh EDD December 1, 2017
@MJDsquared I'm with you on this one. My name is in my email address.. It's not hard to spell it correctly when it's right in front of you. I also don't complain when its spelled wrong on cups, to go orders, etc, and usually just tell them my name is Kat to avoid it. I'll still sometimes get Cat, but whatever. I love kitties
what the eff is up with everyone being so obsessed with double sinks in the bathroom? I hate them! Guess who has to clean all of the sinks in my house? Me! Why do I need 2? It's not like people can't take turns using a freaking sink. I'd rather have the extra counter space!
I feel like double sinks are the new granite countertops of the HGTV house hunters world. Like now it's just something people need without even wondering why they need it. UNNECESSARY!!
lol can you tell I've been watching HGTV all afternoon?
Married May 2014
DD born August 2016
Baby #2 due December 2017
Married 4/22/16
**TW**
BFP 2/1/16 I MC 3/21/16 (11w)
TTCAL 6/15/16
BFP 3/23/2017 Team pink! Quinn Leigh EDD December 1, 2017
DD - 12/28/17
TTC #2 3/2019
BFP 5/2019 || MC - D&C 5/2019
BFP 2/2020 || EDD 10/10/2020
Me: 36 DH: 41
Me: 36 DH: 41
working it should be the woman?!
Character clothes, are hit or miss. I don't like the frilly stuff or covered in glitter. But my girls absolutely love wearing their favorite character Tshirts. And I find that they are perfect for mud, markers, and the wear and tear of kid play. It saves their nicer clothes for when we leave the house.
I hate shirts with phrases or terms that come off as sexist or rude .. like "Sassy" or "boys will be boys" or "girls rule boys drool" or "daddy's new boss... sorry mom".... the list goes on. Ugh. Just, no.