STM+ Check In (week of 7/31)

kmalls · July 2017

This thread is a weekly check in for those expecting their second -- or more! -- child. Feel free to resurrect this thread at any time if you have a question or need to vent about the challenges of having children at home while pregnant.

How far along are you?

How old are your other kids?

Current challenges/concerns about being a STM+ or questions about things your children are going through now?

Current joys/successes/or happy thoughts about being a STM :

Rants/Raves/Randoms/Questions

kmalls · July 2017

How far along are you?
5 weeks

How old are your other kids?
DS is almost 2.5, DD is 9 months

Current challenges/concerns about being a STM+ or questions about things your children are going through now?
We need to start potty training DS, he's totally ready, but I'm dragging my feet big time. And I know I'll want to do it even less when I'm hugely pregnant so we need to just suck it up and start the process. But ugh. Zero motivation.

Current joys/successes/or happy thoughts about being a STM :
My kids have just started really interacting with each other and it's THE CUTEST. I'm so happy we're adding another to the mix!

Rants/Raves/Randoms/Questions
Random: I cannot even fathom getting three young kids into the car every day. It's already a shit show with two, and I feel like it's going to be insanity when the next one arrives.

kindbytealikat · July 2017

How far along are you? 4 weeks 2d

How old are your other kids? DS 2.5 DSD 15 DSS 19 soon

Current challenges/concerns about being a STM+ or questions about things your children are going through now? I'm a bit overwhelmed ATM. This is something I most certainly wanted but now that it's actually happening I'm in the can I really handle this freak out. I'm also worried about how the older step kids are going to react. DSS specifically. We are moving DS to his room to make DS the nursury. DSS has said he will not be back home from college for extended periods after this summer though.

Current joys/successes/or happy thoughts about being a STM : I can't wait to see the fun and love with my kids.

Rants/Raves/Randoms/Questions: Nothing comes to mind

ekendall09 · July 2017

How far along are you?
4 Weeks

How old are your other kids?
DD is 4
Current challenges/concerns about being a STM+ or questions about things your children are going through now?
DD currently has a 4SS and 6 monthly HS (is that a thing, half sister). She seems fine with it but shes always been the only one in our house. I know she'll be the best big sister and will be 5 when LO is born but i'm still nervous that the transition will be hard. She and I are so close and I don't want her to feel like I don't have the same time for her.
Current joys/successes/or happy thoughts about being a STM :
i'm just excited to be growing out little family and seeing DD interact, she is so "motherly" and I know she'll be a helper!

Rants/Raves/Randoms/Questions
When will you tell your DS/DD that your are pregnant? Once we tell her that means everyone will know and i'm not sure when I want that to happen haha

hurricane1212 · July 2017

How far along are you?
4w3d

How old are your other kids?
6 and 3.5

Current challenges/concerns about being a STM+ or questions about things your children are going through now?
Oy... well. My kids are with my very soon to be ex husband (the divorce has lasted over 18 months so far) and I'm pregnant by my boyfriend who I don't want to marry right away. His mom called our kid a bastard already and she doesn't even know I'm pregnant.

Current joys/successes/or happy thoughts about being a STM :
I have a lot to be thankful for.

Rants/Raves/Randoms/Questions

Im not looking forward to all the blood work this week and the progesterone supplements and all the needles and challenges of high risk pregnancy, but I can do it.

ekendall09 · July 2017

@hurricane1212 sigh, I know what you're going through. My divorce took over 2 years from the time I moved out. IT was exhausting and emotionally draining.

My BF and I are currently pregnant but don't feel as though we need to be married to have a family.
I don't expect everyone to understand our decision but we made the decision best for us. I've lived life and started a family according to societies "right way" (engaged, married, pregnant) and it didn't work out. I'm thankful for everything I went through because it got me to where I am

whatabout2ndbreakfast · July 2017

How far along are you? 4 weeks

How old are your other kids? 20 months old

Current challenges/concerns about being a STM+ or questions about things your children are going through now? Currently having a terrible time getting DS to go to sleep. I'm not sure if he's ready to give up his nap - it seems awfully early for that. I'm wondering if he's ready to move to a toddler bed? We already have a toddler bed since he was climbing out of his crib a few weeks ago. He stopped climbing out so we didn't transition yet. I'm a little worried about all the changes that he will go through in the next couple months, with moving to a new bed, potty training, and a sibling.

Current joys/successes/or happy thoughts about being a STM: DS loves playing with the other kids at daycare, so I am excited to see how he will react to a little brother or sister.

Rants/Raves/Randoms/Questions:
@ksmalls I'm also wondering about the car situation! will you be looking for a larger car or do you have space for all 3?
@ekendall09 I'm not sure when we're going to tell DS. I think we will need to wait until I'm showing because I'm not sure that he's going to understand.

ekendall09 · July 2017

@peppersmith22 I transitioned DD to a bed at 22 months, I would have moved her sooner had I had a bed. I left every thing behind when we moved out and all I had was a pack n play for her to sleep in. She slept much better once we transitioned over. Shes now 4 and still a napper so I'm glad I didn't drop that!

Dumbgurl04 · July 2017

How far along are you?
5 weeks

How old are your other kids?
DD is 2.5 will be 3 in october

Current challenges/concerns about being a STM+ or questions about things your children are going through now?
Potty training! DD is so wishy washy about it. She does really good for a couple of days and then it's like we are back to ground zero. So i'm hoping she will catch on.

Current joys/successes/or happy thoughts about being a STM :
I don't know yet, still pretty new so it hasn't really sunk in yet.

Rants/Raves/Randoms/Questions
nothing to really right now. Although I will see I feel completely different this time around. I know they say every pregnancy will be different, but I just feel good and last pregnancy I felt down a lot and hated people. So i hope this good feeling sticks around.

bettyvonsomethingstein · July 2017

@kmalls, our kids are really, really close in age (not quite 2.5 and 6 months). I have the same issues/fears. I need to potty train my toddler, and I have so much anxiousness over outings with three kids.

I love to babywear, but right now I use the stroller a lot because the toddler likes to push it, so it's a great way to keep him contained and not running off. I'm hoping he will still like to do this when the new kid gets here!

mispanda · July 2017

@kmalls my DD is 2.5 today. Potty training is a disaster. Sometimes she goes sometimes she doesn't. I don't want to push it and it be traumatic and then it pushes it back further. I'm just going to go with the flow. I'll push harder closer to 3 I suppose. Besides shes still in a crib ( she loves her crib and doesn't even climb out of it) so I've been thinking of moving her to a big girl bed first.

How far along are you? I don't know anymore. My RE nurse used my LMP when I was on the phone with her so according to her 4 +6. I'm pretty sure I'm 5 tho.

How old are your other kids? 2.5

Current challenges/concerns about being a STM+ or questions about things your children are going through now? I'm worried how they will get along together. The age gap is certainly bigger than I wanted.

Current joys/successes/or happy thoughts about being a STM : Past history has caused me to not really enjoy anything right now. I'm just full of worry and anxiety.

Rants/Raves/Randoms/Questions: I've never been a big water drinker. But when I'm pregnant I always step up my game. UGH I dislike water and it's so much harder to drink it this time.

Dumbgurl04 · July 2017

@mispanda I had a hunch that I was pregnant cause all I wanted to drink was water. I drink water every day but I was drinking a ton more then I usually do.

kmalls · July 2017

@peppersmith22 - we recently upgraded our Chevy Traverse (which I can't recommend enough, it's awesome) to one that has captain's chairs in the second row rather than a bench seat. It's a lot easier to access the third row now, so I think we'll be ok with three kids in it!

@bettyvonsomethingstein - wow, yeah are kids are super close in age! I'm hoping DS (our oldest) will let me put him in the double stroller with DD when the new one gets here and then I can just wear the baby when we go out. It'll be a juggling act for sure.

@mispanda - I never even thought about transitioning DS to a toddler bed before potty training, but that's such a good point. He's still happily in his crib but maybe it's time for a big boy bed? Ugh I just loooove that he loves his crib. It makes bed time so easy!

DeePaddy24 · July 2017

How far along are you?

4+1

How old are your other kids?

DS is 13 months

Current challenges/concerns about being a STM+ or questions about things your children are going through now?

I'm concerned DS will feel left out, and that I won't get to spend as much quality time with him. It's almost like I feel a bit guilty that he'll no longer receive 100% of our attention. He's so awesome and I'm sure he'll adjust really well, but I can't help but worry.

Current joys/successes/or happy thoughts about being a STM :

The news is still sinking in...

Rants/Raves/Randoms/Questions

N/A

beenabee · July 2017

How far along are you?
5w3d

How old are your other kids?
DS will be a year old on Sunday!

Current challenges/concerns about being a STM+ or questions about things your children are going through now?
No

Current joys/successes/or happy thoughts about being a STM :
I'm still not 100% convinced this one is going to stick. Once I'm out of the first trimester, FX, I think it will feel more real. I can't wait for DS to have a sibling and to watch them grow and bond together.

Rants/Raves/Randoms/Questions
Nothing right now.

luna8433 · July 2017

How far along are you?
4w
How old are your other kids?
2.2

Current challenges/concerns about being a STM+ or questions about things your children are going through now?

The potty training with a pregnant nose

Current joys/successes/or happy thoughts about being a STM :

DS doesn't talk much but he does say baby and it melts my heart when he says it.

Rants/Raves/Randoms/Questions
My mom told me I shouldn't be lifting anything but I have a 2 year old about 30lb that always wants to be picked up.

cbutler0045 · July 2017

How far along are you?

4 weeks today!

ekendall09 · July 2017

luna8433 said:

My mom told me I shouldn't be lifting anything but I have a 2 year old about 30lb that always wants to be picked up.

I hope this isn't true. I lift weights 4-5x a week and carry my 40lb 4 year old often! I would think this matters more later on but I can't remember from last pregnancy

whatabout2ndbreakfast · July 2017

@ekendall09 That's good to hear! Maybe I should just transition him and get it over with. He naps great at daycare!
@ksmalls Nice! We may be in the market for a new car depending. I am currently driving a Kia Soul, which I love, but we might need some extra space.
@DeePaddy24 I also worry about splitting our attention! Hopefully having a sibling will make up for it.

Mattel · July 2017

How far along are you? 5 weeks
How old are your other kids? 5 1/2

Current challenges/concerns about being a STM+ or questions about things your children are going through now? Reese is super excited. We've been talking about this for a long time. We already told her, Im just afraid she's going spill the beans!

Current joys/successes/or happy thoughts about being a STM : I can't wait to see her as a sister. She's been practicing forever and she keeps talking to me about "Baby Seahorse." I showed her what the baby looks like at 5 weeks and she said a Seahorse, so we decided that would be our nickname.

Rants/Raves/Randoms/Questions

allen4tl · July 2017

How far along are you? I think about 4.5 weeks but I can't calculate it because I can't for the life of me remember my last period..

How old are your other kids?
I have a 15 month old daughter

Current challenges/concerns about being a STM+ or questions about things your children are going through now?
I have some of the normal fears of "how can I love another child as much as my first one" - at least I think that's normal. My daughter is so cool I hope I have another child that's equally as awesome and also unique.

Current joys/successes/or happy thoughts about being a STM :
I am in a little bit of shock. First time around I was temping and charting and it took 7 months. This time we were just not preventing and it happened in 2 months so it was unexpected but happy news.

Rants/Raves/Randoms/Questions nothing much.

ekendall09 · July 2017

@allen4tl bummer on not remembering the date, they'll probably base it off your first U/S. I usually try and think of an event that I had my period at and can usually get close to the date it started if I haven't marked it down

holly321 · July 2017

How far along are you?
4 weeks 5 days
How old are your other kids?
DD is 6 DS is 4.5
Current challenges/concerns about being a STM+ or questions about things your children are going through now?
DS is not happy about having a baby around. He says they are loud and he doesn't like them. DD is at least excited
Current joys/successes/or happy thoughts about being a STM :
Kids are out of school for the summer, and we have been having a lot of fun playing outside.
Rants/Raves/Randoms/Questions
dd is bipolar, and I know she has only know a few days, but the news of the baby has super been helping her moods.

dirtyboots · July 2017

How far along are you?
5w1d

How old are your other kids?
He'll be 1 on Wednesday.

Current challenges/concerns about being a STM+ or questions about things your children are going through now?
Not at this time.

Current joys/successes/or happy thoughts about being a STM :
DS#1 has slept through the night 3 nights in a row!!! *knocks on wood*

Rants/Raves/Randoms/Questions

@luna8433 - That weight lifting thing is like if you had decided NOW you are going to become a profesh dead lifter or a MMA fighter. But, if its something you did before your bfp you certainly can continue. Unless you really are a MMA fighter, then you may want to reconsider. lol

sdavis2189 · August 2017

How far along are you?
4 weeks

How old are your other kids?
11 months (will be one on 8/29)

Current challenges/concerns about being a STM+ or questions about things your children are going through now?
Terrified about affording daycare for two and being a working mom with two kids. I feel like I'm already stretched really thin with one. Also worried about breastfeeding, since it didn't work out last time and I had to EP.

Current joys/successes/or happy thoughts about being a STM :
Really excited to have kids so close in age.

Rants/Raves/Randoms/Questions
Nothing now.

DeePaddy24 · August 2017

@sdavis2189 I also ended up having to EP with my first. The thought of having to do it again sends me into a complete panic. I'm not sure I could do it again, but mom guilt is so real!

kindbytealikat · August 2017

@sdavis2189 add me to the EP club. I only lasted 6 months

hurricane1212 · August 2017

Yeah, I had to EP as well.
FUCK THAT.

nond135 · August 2017

How far along are you? 4+1 according to O date (temping and OPKs)

How old are your other kids? (almost) 2 and 4 1/2

Current challenges/concerns about being a STM+ or questions about things your children are going through now? Biggest fear is where this baby implanted right now and concerns about having third c-section. I have an ultrasound on 8/16 so maybe that will help some.

Current joys/successes/or happy thoughts about being a STM : I adore my kids. They are incredibly smart, generally well behaved, love playing together and really fun to be around. My oldest starts half day pre-k in a couple weeks which is very bittersweet. I really hope their little brother or sister falls right in place with them. The gap between DD#1 and DD#2 is within a couple weeks of the gap between DD#2 and this next one so I'm hopeful. Its a great gap.

Rants/Raves/Randoms/Questions I had a lot of BFing issues with my second also. My first was perfectly fine and we nursed till over 18 months when she just decided she was done. My second though was a nightmare of epic proportions. Still nurses before nap and bed at almost 2 so we persevered, but I think I lost 10 years of my life in the process. Very nervous for #3 and really hoping I don't have to pump nearly as much this time

finnja · August 2017

How far along are you? 5w1d

How old are your other kids? 22 months

Current challenges/concerns about being a STM+ or questions about things your children are going through now? I wanted my gap to be 3 years but it happened sooner and I feel overwhelmed because of being in grad school, in the middle of a remodel and working. DS loves playing with other kids and LOVES babies, so it'll be good, I'm just trying to stay relaxed (especially since I just took a reproductive endocrinology class and learned how bad stress is on development in the first trimester)

Also, I have the pickiest, neophobic eater. I don't know how to tackle it. Would love any help in this department! The whole "you offer, he chooses" hasn't worked. His choice is always NO. lol. He will just hold out for something better.

Current joys/successes/or happy thoughts about being a STM : I'm excited to meet the next member of my family and have my crew. There's just no joy compared to that felt by your own child.

Rants/Raves/Randoms/Questions
I have been so irritable since getting pregnant. i feel terrible for MH!

@nond135 I'm glad to hear 2.5 year gap is a great gap! I was a little nervous about having this gap but good to hear it has worked out well for you!

rbs2015 · August 2017

How far along are you?

4w5d
How old are your other kids?
21 months
Current challenges/concerns about being a STM+ or questions about things your children are going through now?
I'm overall anxious about having 2 so close in age. We are so excited to be expecting, just a little anxious about all the unknowns. Because I am a SAHM it will be a lot different and more challenging adding another to the mix.
Current joys/successes/or happy thoughts about being a STM :
It's amazing that we were blessed with a second now. I can't wait to see my daughter become a big sister.
Rants/Raves/Randoms/Questions
Will I even get out of the house in the first year with two?

pbandjmom · August 2017

How far along are you? 4wks, 3 days

How old are your other kids? DD is almost 3.5

Current challenges/concerns about being a STM+ or questions about things your children are going through now? nope! I'm very Lucky that my DD is well behaved, happy, and silly. She loves playing "mommy" and playing with the other kids in the neighborhood.

Current joys/successes/or happy thoughts about being a STM : just very excited! This is the same season I was pregnant with my first (will be both April babies) and so I feel very happy. It reminds me of being pregnant with her and what a joyous time in my life it was, and is. I feel much better about this one even coming from my MC in May.

Rants/Raves/Randoms/Questions nope!

ktw1518 · August 2017

How far along are you? 4 weeks 3 days

How old are your other kids? DS just turned 2 in May

Current challenges/concerns about being a STM+ or questions about things your children are going through now? Lack of sleep!! Also getting ready to start potty training and really dreading it.

Current joys/successes/or happy thoughts about being a STM : Excited to give my son a brother or sister and just to be growing our family. Love babies so excited to have one around again!

Rants/Raves/Randoms/Questions: I can't have dairy and have been wanting a grilled cheese so badly!!

kindbytealikat · August 2017

@rbs2015 a friend of mine has her second when her first was 1.5. She'll say learn to love baby wearing to get out of the house

orangecup · August 2017

How far along are you? 4w

How old are your other kids? 2

Current challenges/concerns about being a STM+ or questions about things your children are going through now?
I definitely hope to have DS potty trained before this baby is born. He'll be almost 3 so I think that's realistic.
Current joys/successes/or happy thoughts about being a STM :
I think DS will love having a sibling. He's very affectionate.
Rants/Raves/Randoms/Questions
I have really mixed feelings about BFing again. I did it with DS a little over a year. Around 6 months I had to switch to EP because he was a very distracted nurser and a biter.

Dumbgurl04 · August 2017

right there with you on being irritable @finnja people are just being way to annoying here for the last week in a half.

sjn00 · August 2017

How far along are you?
4 weeks and 2 days

How old are your other kids?
3 yrs

Current challenges/concerns about being a STM+ or questions about things your children are going through now?
The tantrums of a 3 year old. I am really worried about jealousy. She has a 1.5 year old cousin that lives next door whom she loves to play with, but she is very territorial over stuff. Hopefully that gets better...

Current joys/successes/or happy thoughts about being a STM :
Im excited for my daughter to have a little sibling.

Rants/Raves/Randoms/Questions
None.

nond135 · August 2017

@rbs2015 You will be fine. My first two were 2 months further apart than yours will be, but I had a c-section and was still out of the house going to library storytimes, the park, zoo etc... by 4 or 5 weeks. Babywearing definitely made the first year a million times easier though. You will have to force yourself most likely
at first and prep takes a bit of getting used to, but its not so bad.

kaymaroo · August 2017

How far along are you?
4w1d

How old are your other kids?
5 1/2 years

Current challenges/concerns about being a STM+ or questions about things your children are going through now?
It's been so long since I had a baby that I feel like I'm starting all over! My little guy is pretty independent when it comes to getting ready in the morning, entertaining himself, etc., and I'm afraid I've forgotten how to take care of a newborn.

Current joys/successes/or happy thoughts about being a STM :
DS has been telling everyone I'm having a baby for the past year--despite the fact that he doesn't even know we're expecting yet--because he's so stinking excited to have a sibling. He already has a half-brother at his dad's and he has lots of little cousins so I know he'll be great with a baby. I can't wait to see him in his role as big brother.

Rants/Raves/Randoms/Questions
I'm so tired all the time and not ready to tell DS yet that we're expecting. I'm afraid he's going to think I've lost interest in him or something.

sdavis2189 · August 2017

@DeePaddy24 @kindbytealikat @hurricane1212 right?! Ugh and I saw the new CDC guidelines that say no more pump parts in the fridge between pumps. DH is pushing for formula from the start. But I am determined!

ejled · August 2017

@sdavis2189 WHAT?? no more pump parts in the fridge?? Please tell me CDC is playing a mean joke. I'm all about that Sarah Wells pumparoo bag

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