Talking about infertility with a co-worker

zena_mils · July 2017

Yesterday my co-worker kind of floated the idea that infertility might be something women should accept because it’s meant to be (God’s will?) or nature’s population control or way of saying you shouldn’t have children.

And it’s one thing to criticize expensive and onerous fertility treatments and IVF, especially when we live in a world with so many children without families and homes (the reason we were talking about it in the first place). There’s no end of discussion to be had, I think, about how we prioritize/romanticize blood relationships, imply nature trumps nurture, and act as though pregnancy and gestation create magical bonds between mother and child. Those are good topics to explore.

But to say, in this day and age, that infertility must not be overcome, even when we have the tools to sometimes overcome it … let’s just say that I was pretty shocked

looeeze · July 2017

Hey- so it seems like you're really hurting and feeling a lot of feels. I'm sorry for that, truly. It sucks. But we don't flood the board with a bunch of personal threads here so please stop that. You can post in the newbie thread here and get to know the rest of us. Good luck.

becausescience · July 2017

zena_mils said:

Yesterday my co-worker kind of floated the idea that infertility might be something women should accept because it’s meant to be (God’s will?) or nature’s population control or way of saying you shouldn’t have children.
And it’s one thing to criticize expensive and onerous fertility treatments and IVF, especially when we live in a world with so many children without families and homes (the reason we were talking about it in the first place). There’s no end of discussion to be had, I think, about how we prioritize/romanticize blood relationships, imply nature trumps nurture, and act as though pregnancy and gestation create magical bonds between mother and child. Those are good topics to explore.

But to say, in this day and age, that infertility must not be overcome, even when we have the tools to sometimes overcome it … let’s just say that I was pretty shocked

[Deleted User] · July 2017

Please for the love of all that is good stop creating Dear Diary threads.

Go read the newbie "READ THIS FIRST" thread, introduce yourself in the newbie intro thread, and get involved in the daily/weekly threads.

This is your third dear diary post today that doesn't help anyone else at all. Please stop.

izza2 · July 2017

zena_mils said:

Yesterday my co-worker kind of floated the idea that infertility might be something women should accept because it’s meant to be (God’s will?) or nature’s population control or way of saying you shouldn’t have children.
And it’s one thing to criticize expensive and onerous fertility treatments and IVF, especially when we live in a world with so many children without families and homes (the reason we were talking about it in the first place). There’s no end of discussion to be had, I think, about how we prioritize/romanticize blood relationships, imply nature trumps nurture, and act as though pregnancy and gestation create magical bonds between mother and child. Those are good topics to explore.

But to say, in this day and age, that infertility must not be overcome, even when we have the tools to sometimes overcome it … let’s just say that I was pretty shocked

And now I just feel like this:

Image: https://media.giphy.com/media/QqostCXAat440/giphy.gif

Image: https://media.giphy.com/media/IxPDc96oRya6A/giphy.gif

Jyoung327 · July 2017

Maybe start a personal blog instead. I'm not sure we are what you need and/or vice versa

chaniship · July 2017

I know a certain other baby website message board that would be fine with these kinds of posts!

Talking about infertility with a co-worker

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