Panicking about labor

shimana · July 2017

hi all,
as i get closer to the delivery i cant help but panic a little about labor. The mommas on here who have already experienced labor pain, um is it really as bad as the internet and the tv shows make it look like??

meggyme · July 2017

shimana said:

hi all,
as i get closer to the delivery i cant help but panic a little about labor. The mommas on here who have already experienced labor pain, um is it really as bad as the internet and the tv shows make it look like??

Not tv. What aspect are you worried about? The pain? There are pain management options. Not knowing what you're doing? There are knowledgeable nurses there to guide you through it.

I would say that the month and a half following giving birth were far harder than delivery itself. I had mentally prepared myself for pain, for sleeplessness, for crazy hormones, etc. But when I thought of them I thought of them individually but they're experienced all at once. That can be a little overwhelming. But with good support, especially from your partner at night, you can make it through. In the end it's all worth it. And labor and delivery is truly just a blip along the way and the memory of it fades quicker than you would think.

harpseal135 · July 2017

shimana said:

hi all,
as i get closer to the delivery i cant help but panic a little about labor. The mommas on here who have already experienced labor pain, um is it really as bad as the internet and the tv shows make it look like??

Not sure how much tgis helps, but:
I labored for 36 hours, active labor 16 hours. Initial onset of labor just felt like period cramps. They did not hurt just very uncomfortable.

Eventually, they became regular and patterned, in which I went to the hospital per my nurses line with my Dr. When I was in triage to be monitored, they told me I was in active labor, dilated at 4 and was being admitted. I thought to myself, if this is active labor I may have it easy. I was so wrong.

I was admitted at 930 am. The pain never for worse nor did I dilate until after 400.....at this point, I was walking around nonstop, moving around, etc. Around 400 I suddenly had a horrid contraction and they started coming one after another, waves and nonstop.... My body was not relaxing enough inbetween. I'll be honest, it was aweful for me and I tolerate pain fairly well. Around 430 I asked to be checked again, still a 4. No progression with dilation. I was exhausted and asked for the epidural. Around 600, the doctor came in and was going to ask about breaking the water, I told her, too late it just did. They tested and sure enough, I was still dilated at 4. Once that water broke, I quickly dilated and started pushing around 7.

I pushed for 2.5 hours was minutes from Csection as her oxygen and heart rate levels were going down, but I was able to push her out. I could still feel some of the contractions with the epidural, but the "ring of fire" that was painful, I tore extremely bad (doc said 1.5mm away from going to the OR for stitching).

But once my husband announced to the room that we had a baby girl, and they placed her on my chest everything became a blur and it was just pure joy and love.

I was a bit bummed about the epidural, but the nurse told me that sometimes the body can't relax enough between contractions and the epidural helps with it. She said that she had a good feeling it wouldn't stall or prolong labor, because I was having strong patterned contractions already. She told me it's the patients that come in and immediately want an epidural because they don't want to feel any pain, that they have most issues with stalled labor.

Each labor is so different, my friend from water breaking and 1st contraction to birth was 45 minutes. Delivered in the ER, because they didn't have time to get her upstairs to L&D she said it was uncomfortable but not painful.

shimana · July 2017

Thanks to u both for ur replies.
i must admit im a little too nervous at this point. 3rescuecups, was it ur first?

meggyme · July 2017

@shimana what part are you nervous about? It might be helpful to avoid negative birth stories, or at least focus on finding positive ones. They do exist and they're nothing like TV (they'd be too boring without all the drama). Try and build a birth team that you trust, try to go with the flow when the time comes and remember that any delivery that ends with a healthy mother and child is a great one.

momof2buggs · July 2017

meggyme said:

shimana said:

hi all,
as i get closer to the delivery i cant help but panic a little about labor. The mommas on here who have already experienced labor pain, um is it really as bad as the internet and the tv shows make it look like??

Not tv. What aspect are you worried about? The pain? There are pain management options. Not knowing what you're doing? There are knowledgeable nurses there to guide you through it.

I would say that the month and a half following giving birth were far harder than delivery itself. I had mentally prepared myself for pain, for sleeplessness, for crazy hormones, etc. But when I thought of them I thought of them individually but they're experienced all at once. That can be a little overwhelming. But with good support, especially from your partner at night, you can make it through. In the end it's all worth it. And labor and delivery is truly just a blip along the way and the memory of it fades quicker than you would think.

This.

shimana · July 2017

@meggyme, its the pain im concerned about mostly. I keep thinking what if i cant do it and then it results in obstructed labor or something.
i know i should ignore these negative thoughts

meggyme · July 2017

shimana said:

@meggyme, its the pain im concerned about mostly. I keep thinking what if i cant do it and then it results in obstructed labor or something.
i know i should ignore these negative thoughts

Have you done a birthing class or anything like that? It might help to ease your mind if you have some tools that you and your partner can use to help manage the pain until you can get admitted to the hospital. And any pain you experience will come in waves of no more than maybe a minute and a half. 90 seconds or so. That's not much time. And each one will end and it's all temporary. And at the end of it all you will have your baby in your arms.

shimana · July 2017

Thanks @meggyme
I hope it all goes well. Im gonna try and think positive.

JennyColada · July 2017

*lurker, still TTC* I think these feelings are pretty normal to most moms, especially first time mommas that don't know exactly what to expect. Don't be worried by your nervousness, there's nothing wrong with it!

You're going to end up with a baby, there's really no way to avoid that. If you have trouble laboring, then you'll get pain medication. If you end up with obstructed labor, then you'll get a C-section. That baby's coming out whether you want it or not (lol).

Flip60 · July 2017

I was very anxious before the birth of my first child. I was actually afraid to get an epidural but knew if the pain got bad enough the choice would be made for me. It was and I did eventually get the epidural and then thought wow I should have done that earlier as I was finally able to relax. My experience was a bit different though as I was induced and the high amounts of pitocin I was given made my contractions extra strong and closer together (I think). What is most important to focus on is what an INCREDIBLE journey it is! There really is nothing like the sound of hearing your baby first cry or holding them and looking in to their eyes. It is really truly the most wonderful experience. Also no matter how the baby gets here (mine ended in a c-section) it is something to feel so proud of yourself for. Don't let anyone make you feel a c-section is not as strong or an epidural is not as strong. Every single part of it takes strength and is AMAZING. I felt that way with both my children's births and was very anxious beforehand and all was good. Feel free to reach out if you have any other questions. ☺

BabySunshine4 · July 2017

I've had two boys with the epidural and one boy with no pain meds. I think it is how you prepare your self mentally. Yoga and Pilates helped with my breathing and both positions while in active labor during my last pregnancy with no pain meds. Just prepare your body and find your happy place.

msashley2010-2 · July 2017

I completely understand where you are coming from. I cannot say that labor did not hurt but I hardly even remember it at this point. There's a lot of pain management options as well! I got the epidural about an hour before delivery and I felt no pain at all after that point. However, I really want to try to make it without an epidural this time around because I want to be able to get up and walk around afterward!

I'm sure you will do amazing!

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