@Perfectypo I hope it works out! That's a dumb thing to base a candidate off of. Most places don't even pay for mileage, I think it's a good idea to say you'll take less if you really want the job and it's THAT important to them. So odd.
So I just converted KM to miles, and it is only NINE miles!!!! WTH?!?!?! What employers limit their recruiting to 9 miles!!!!! I just emailed them back, so I'll keep you all updated. Hopefully I can negotiate something with them.
@SweetMelissa4 ugh why must ppl touch the bellies?! And totally normal, I am just 18 weeks and feel just small little movements, nothing that could be felt from outside
Honeybear has decided that his nickname for the baby is "Patatje" (little potato). Sometimes I do not understand that man.
25 - FTM - BF Mom - Using CDs - Blogger and Soap Merchant Married for two years to my Honeybear and expecting a little Honeybee on our homestead in Belgium.
Today I told DH that i like it when he touches my belly but not so much when other people do and he was completely shocked to find out other people (mostly his male relatives) touch my belly. I'm like... literally strangers on the bus touch me now
@SweetMelissa4 I can feel outside kicks (19+3) but they are so infrequent and hard to feel. Also, way lower than I would feel comfortable having even a close friend rest their hand for an extended period of time.
@mariposa_767s I would easily give up all of the child support to not have to deal with as much crap as I tend to deal with.
@ElizabethSchuyler Honestly, my lawyer is great. Instead of accepting that he wants to pay less child support, she's asking for more child support based on the fact that he got a second job and his income went up a lot. As far as parenting time, we're trying to work out something that keeps the amount of time the same, but makes more sense for our schedules. We also agreed (at the recommendation of his lawyer) to try co-parenting counseling with a therapist. I'm hoping that benefits me, because I think he's a little crazy and i think his true colors will come out in the therapy session and the therapist will be able to see how unstable he is. We are hoping to work out the details before our court date June 20th.
WTF to my incessant peeing tonight (it's making me worry I have an infection!) and my vagina for those painful twinges that are happening too frequently for my taste right now. FX for non infection, drinking alllll the cranberry juice.
@DuchessOfCambridge I had that over the weekend and I was worried about infection as well but it seems to have gotten better.
My wtf is just this whole day in general. My work is stupid. I still don't know when my job will be officially ending and still hoping to get another position. And my nausea is terrible tonight. And I got a jury duty summons in the mail. Plus the hormones....all the tears tonight. Hoping for a better tomorrow.
@DuchessofCambridge and @angkay711 I also felt like that yesterday and was worried maybe I had an infection. I felt like a little down there. It eases up last night so I'm hoping I was just worrying.
I have a late WTF, but dang it DH. He was going to let me sleep in since DS had a really rough night with an upset stomach and I was up literally 10 times with him. Also, I was late getting to bed since I waited up for him after he had "one drink" after work that took over an hour.
So DS wakes up, it takes 5 minutes for DH to wake up, so again I'm up with him. Then he says "I just have to go to the bathroom and I'll take him"
dude is taking a 15 minute poop while I'm being used as a jungle gym and pelted with toys. Yeah, sure I'll just fall back asleep now. Thanks for nothing.
My WTF is late as well.... wtf to my toddler who suddenly is terrified of baths and screams bloody murder and tried to climb out the entire time. Took two of us to get the job done. One to hold her in and one to wash.
@cmessamore that's why I went the way we did. Our divorce was uncontested. He didn't care what the terms were as long as he didn't have to pay me. He is supposed to have every Friday evening through Saturday, but I took away overnights after he moved his new fiancé and her four kids in after knowing her for two weeks. DS's bed became her 3 yr old's bed which voided the parenting agreement. They are both addicts and it's just a sad unraveling. That was a year ago. He also attempted suicide in which the pregnant fiancé called me from the hospital because I still had a medical POA and they wouldn't release any information to her. His parents also didn't accept her phone calls. It's a whole load of crazy. A year later, he only sees or speaks to DS every other month or so. And at least he's decent enough to keep him away from the house unless trusted family is in town. It sucks though because DS has a baby half brother now that he's only seen once. Luckily, his fiancé is nice to me and we get along for the sake of the kids. She's crazy and fragile, but unfortunately I understand addicts from my experience with my ex. I don't have anything against her, but her lows are very low and she can get very mean. DS doesn't like her as a result.
That was probably way too much info, but know that you aren't alone in having to deal with crazy. Give and take is the best way to get an outcome you can handle. And patience...lots of patience.
A day late but I gotta get it out Feeling like I should start a separate thread for my SIL but here it goes. I apologize in advance for the rant and anyone who gets bored easily may want to stop now. Saw my SIL and she was like "wow you're huge!" And I'm like haha, yeah, next week I'm halfway through my pregnancy. And she goes " you'll be okay though, you're young so you can lose weight fast" this pissed me off so much, this is the same thing she says everytime my recent weight loss is brought up, and yeah it totally helps that I'm not 40, and yeah , I was/am able to exercise more vigorously because I'm young (not actually entirely sure that's true because there's some boss ass women at the gym who are older than me) when it comes down to it I was overweight with no medical reason. I was overweight because I ate whatever I wanted, drank a shit load of booze, and never exercised. Losing weight for me wasn't going to the gym once a week and it magically disappeared, I hired a personal trainer for the first 3 months of my weight loss journey. I went to the gym 6 days a week. I woke up early for work so I could walk instead of taking the bus everyday. I spent all day every Sunday prepping all my meals and snacks for the week. I charted EVERYTHING, hoe many hours of sleep I got, how much sugar I ate, exactly what I ate, how much water I drank. Everything. I cut out drinking entirely, cutting myself off from an entire group of friends whom I now never speak to. So YES it happened because I'm young, but let's not forget that I.worked.my.ass.off to get where I am today and it makes me so angry that she completely undermines that by saying that it's only because I'm young. ALSO, maybe I won't lose the baby weight soon after I give birth, and THAT'S OKAY because I'm not going to be doing all that stuff mentioned above as I am going to be raising a tiny human. It also upsets me that she throws comments like that around in front of my step daughter. First of all, my weight is none of your fucking business, and my daughter needs to know that it's not okay for ANY ONE to ever say anything about your body. Secondly, I am very careful to use only body positive language around my SD because she has low self esteem and I'm attempting to model self love. I ended up responding with " I'm not too worried about my weight, I know what healthy feels like and that's what's important" But I hate that I didn't just flip out at her.
ALSO why does she just ASSUME that the most important thing to me is how fast I will lose my baby weight? It's those kind of comments and bullshit mentality that make women feel like they're NEVER good enough from a young age. I AM BIRTHING A HUMAN BEING. When I'm done with that I will be raising a member of society. I could be carrying the first female president ( unlikely because I'm Canadian but still) WHY does it matter what size my jeans are? Why assume that's the most important thing for me? I lost a ton of weight because I was unhealthy and it was potentially preventing me from getting pregnant. I have been very open about why I lost weight . It was NOT for the "hot" body, it was for the healthy life. Ugh I hate her so much
@bcashaw preach!!! I lost 50 pounds a few years back and people kept saying "what's your secret?" Ummm I got off my ass, joined a gym, went religiously, and stopped stuffing junk in my face. It was hard work!!
Im back up 25 of those pounds, and yeah eventually I'd like to lose some of that, but I don't have the same metabolism and free time anymore and that's ok. But my body has spent the last 3+ years growing and nursing babies and it's awesome. I still feel healthy no matter what the scale says. Don't let her get under your skin. It just sounds like she's jealous of your results and dedication.
@bcashaw just have to shake it off- I am realizing that I am so prickly recently and it's throwing me off balance. What people say is more of a reflection of them than it is on you. Props to you for that dedication & getting the results. I am also usually very fit and have relaxed during this pregnancy **TW multiple losses- the nurse recommended that I forgo my workouts/any heavy lifting. I still haven't gone back ***TW. Despite being so relaxed I still gained the same weight I did with my first when I was working out more consistently and eating healthy- I lost all that weight and more and I believe I can do it again. You will too!! (*ps regardless of age- at 34, I never looked better- even in my 20s!!).
@bcashaw congrats on the weight loss. It's definitely a lot of work. For me, it took being unhappy, a divorce, becoming a single mom, working out to keep my sanity, finding my confidence again, and the help of Adderall (for said sanity). I've blown up this pregnancy and it's discouraging. I'm trying to maintain a healthy outlook but it's hard sometimes. Comments like that would make me very upset. It's true that many women already feel like we aren't enough.
Well, I had just talked about how I had been puking with diarrhea for about 4 hours, finally got to bile, and then took meds, and said "yeah you missed out." She got an elective because she was afraid of the pain--it was her first kid and their was no medical reasoning for it. Like, having a C-section isn't painful. So I don't know why my comment was as out of line as hers. Nothing I said was knocking C-sections and she had NOOOO desire on the planet to have a vag birth as she told me a million times.
Well, I had just talked about how I had been puking with diarrhea for about 4 hours, finally got to bile, and then took meds, and said "yeah you missed out." She got an elective because she was afraid of the pain--it was her first kid and their was no medical reasoning for it. Like, having a C-section isn't painful. So I don't know why my comment was as out of line as hers. Nothing I said was knocking C-sections and she had NOOOO desire on the planet to have a vag birth as she told me a million times.
@peregrinefalconx I stand by what I said given how you presented it originally. Sounds like you guys are more frenemies than friends.
ElizabethSchuyler We're not frenemies, but she def has said many a thing over the years that have been hurtful and she doesn't know she does it (and it has affected her life in many ways sadly). As I hope my comment was clear on, this wasn't an anti-C section/pro vag birth thing. Just one more thing that slipped out of her mouth...just didn't need one more reason to feel insecure about my lady parts. Anyway, thanks.
ElizabethSchuyler We're not frenemies, but she def has said many a thing over the years that have been hurtful and she doesn't know she does it (and it has affected her life in many ways sadly). As I hope my comment was clear on, this wasn't an anti-C section/pro vag birth thing. Just one more thing that slipped out of her mouth...just didn't need one more reason to feel insecure about my lady parts. Anyway, thanks.
A negative comment also slipped out of your mouth too. You're defensive that your birth was harder and you ended up putting down her birth. Regardless of how much her c-section "wasn't needed," it's what she chose and it's what many women who you presented your comment to on this thread chose as well. Please think about what you post before you do. Many women here who have had c-sections actually DO feel like they missed out on a vaginal birth and those same women have to hear about it YEARS after they had to make that decision.
If she keeps saying hurtful things you need to have a talk with her. If she doesn't change and she's affecting your life this much, she needs to go.
@peregrinfalconx@elizabethschuyler full disclosure: I actually told my OB that I would prefer to have a repeat C-section since I already have scar tissue in my stomach and I'd rather not chance having a messed up vag to go with it. Obviously none of that is set in stone. We all make our decisions for our own reasons and there are pros and cons either way. Just because it's what she elected doesn't mean there's something wrong with it. To say she missed out is rude. Perhaps she feels it's you that's missing out.
@peregrinefalconx I had a vaginal delivery but have several friends who had c-sections. Regardless of their reasons, they feel like they have to justify themselves because for some reason society views a c-section as the easy way out. You even said yourself c-sections aren't painful. Like, sure you get out of having contractions (if it's scheduled) but it's still MAJOR ABDOMINAL SURGERY. There's plenty of potential for complications, they still have to recover from it (and usually for longer than a vaginal birth), and for some reason they are so often made to feel embarrassed by that. I'm sure you weren't the first person to tell her (even "jokingly") that she should've done it differently. Even though it's no one's business but hers.
ooodalollly Please reread both of my posts clearly. C-sections are absolutely painful!!! (I said, as if they're not!) Not to mention the additional recovery time and potential long term complications. As I said, nobody gets out easily. Me jokingly saying after telling the barfing, crapping story should have been pretty clear that I wasn't rubbing it in her face--she knew I wasn't.
Nobody needs to justify a C-section. However, I spent hours (and hours, over 6 months) going back and forth with her about whether she wanted one. She ultimately chose it and she's happy with it. I just don't need someone mocking me either for my "looseness" or whatever (since when is that ok?). And she does not feel like she missed out. And I do understand why other ladies do--I would never take that away from them. Anyway, I guess my WTF was poorly taken. And completley misunderstood. I have multiple friends who would have died if that wasn't an option. Ones that can't have kids again bc their insides are messed up. And I don't care if you do choose one, that's your business. Or choose one bc you feel like it, want it, need it, etc. I have never been anything but supportive on this site.
I have chosen to stay friends with her. She's a good person. She just let's thing slip out. Anyway, I'm done. Sorry this offended so many people. I have nothing against anybody's decisions--it's your life.
How about we just all admit that labor and delivery is hard whether the baby comes out of your vag or your belly or anywhere else that Science will try to develop?! And there are issues with all types of deliveries and pain and suffering and joy and we can all admit that we only know what we have personally experienced!
Re: WTF Wednesday 6/7
Married for two years to my Honeybear and expecting a little Honeybee on our homestead in Belgium.
I'm like... literally strangers on the bus touch me now
@Perfectypo that's ridiculous!!
@ElizabethSchuyler Honestly, my lawyer is great. Instead of accepting that he wants to pay less child support, she's asking for more child support based on the fact that he got a second job and his income went up a lot. As far as parenting time, we're trying to work out something that keeps the amount of time the same, but makes more sense for our schedules. We also agreed (at the recommendation of his lawyer) to try co-parenting counseling with a therapist. I'm hoping that benefits me, because I think he's a little crazy and i think his true colors will come out in the therapy session and the therapist will be able to see how unstable he is. We are hoping to work out the details before our court date June 20th.
My wtf is just this whole day in general. My work is stupid. I still don't know when my job will be officially ending and still hoping to get another position. And my nausea is terrible tonight. And I got a jury duty summons in the mail. Plus the hormones....all the tears tonight.
Hoping for a better tomorrow.
So DS wakes up, it takes 5 minutes for DH to wake up, so again I'm up with him. Then he says "I just have to go to the bathroom and I'll take him"
dude is taking a 15 minute poop while I'm being used as a jungle gym and pelted with toys. Yeah, sure I'll just fall back asleep now. Thanks for nothing.
@cmessamore that's why I went the way we did. Our divorce was uncontested. He didn't care what the terms were as long as he didn't have to pay me. He is supposed to have every Friday evening through Saturday, but I took away overnights after he moved his new fiancé and her four kids in after knowing her for two weeks. DS's bed became her 3 yr old's bed which voided the parenting agreement. They are both addicts and it's just a sad unraveling. That was a year ago. He also attempted suicide in which the pregnant fiancé called me from the hospital because I still had a medical POA and they wouldn't release any information to her. His parents also didn't accept her phone calls. It's a whole load of crazy. A year later, he only sees or speaks to DS every other month or so. And at least he's decent enough to keep him away from the house unless trusted family is in town. It sucks though because DS has a baby half brother now that he's only seen once. Luckily, his fiancé is nice to me and we get along for the sake of the kids. She's crazy and fragile, but unfortunately I understand addicts from my experience with my ex. I don't have anything against her, but her lows are very low and she can get very mean. DS doesn't like her as a result.
That was probably way too much info, but know that you aren't alone in having to deal with crazy. Give and take is the best way to get an outcome you can handle. And patience...lots of patience.
DS1 is 7. DD is 1. DS2 is coming in late April.
Wtf boobs. I'm up two cup AND band sizes at 14+5.
Feeling like I should start a separate thread for my SIL but here it goes. I apologize in advance for the rant and anyone who gets bored easily may want to stop now. Saw my SIL and she was like "wow you're huge!" And I'm like haha, yeah, next week I'm halfway through my pregnancy. And she goes " you'll be okay though, you're young so you can lose weight fast" this pissed me off so much, this is the same thing she says everytime my recent weight loss is brought up, and yeah it totally helps that I'm not 40, and yeah , I was/am able to exercise more vigorously because I'm young (not actually entirely sure that's true because there's some boss ass women at the gym who are older than me) when it comes down to it I was overweight with no medical reason. I was overweight because I ate whatever I wanted, drank a shit load of booze, and never exercised. Losing weight for me wasn't going to the gym once a week and it magically disappeared, I hired a personal trainer for the first 3 months of my weight loss journey. I went to the gym 6 days a week. I woke up early for work so I could walk instead of taking the bus everyday. I spent all day every Sunday prepping all my meals and snacks for the week. I charted EVERYTHING, hoe many hours of sleep I got, how much sugar I ate, exactly what I ate, how much water I drank. Everything. I cut out drinking entirely, cutting myself off from an entire group of friends whom I now never speak to. So YES it happened because I'm young, but let's not forget that I.worked.my.ass.off to get where I am today and it makes me so angry that she completely undermines that by saying that it's only because I'm young.
ALSO, maybe I won't lose the baby weight soon after I give birth, and THAT'S OKAY because I'm not going to be doing all that stuff mentioned above as I am going to be raising a tiny human.
It also upsets me that she throws comments like that around in front of my step daughter. First of all, my weight is none of your fucking business, and my daughter needs to know that it's not okay for ANY ONE to ever say anything about your body. Secondly, I am very careful to use only body positive language around my SD because she has low self esteem and I'm attempting to model self love.
I ended up responding with " I'm not too worried about my weight, I know what healthy feels like and that's what's important"
But I hate that I didn't just flip out at her.
I AM BIRTHING A HUMAN BEING. When I'm done with that I will be raising a member of society. I could be carrying the first female president ( unlikely because I'm Canadian but still) WHY does it matter what size my jeans are?
Why assume that's the most important thing for me?
I lost a ton of weight because I was unhealthy and it was potentially preventing me from getting pregnant. I have been very open about why I lost weight . It was NOT for the "hot" body, it was for the healthy life.
Ugh I hate her so much
K I'm done
Im back up 25 of those pounds, and yeah eventually I'd like to lose some of that, but I don't have the same metabolism and free time anymore and that's ok. But my body has spent the last 3+ years growing and nursing babies and it's awesome. I still feel healthy no matter what the scale says. Don't let her get under your skin. It just sounds like she's jealous of your results and dedication.
DS: 18 months
Dx DOR AMH .2
<a href="http://www.thebump.com/?utm_source=ticker&utm_medium=HTML&utm_campaign=tickers" title="Pregnancy"><img
DS1 is 7. DD is 1. DS2 is coming in late April.
Well, I had just talked about how I had been puking with diarrhea for about 4 hours, finally got to bile, and then took meds, and said "yeah you missed out." She got an elective because she was afraid of the pain--it was her first kid and their was no medical reasoning for it. Like, having a C-section isn't painful. So I don't know why my comment was as out of line as hers. Nothing I said was knocking C-sections and she had NOOOO desire on the planet to have a vag birth as she told me a million times.
Me: 42, DH: 46, Married: 11/12
Losses: MMC#1 11/12 BO, MC#2 11/13 at 8w BO?, MMC#3 8/14 chromo healthy M @12 weeks, stopped growing at 10.
Negligible AMH, FSH finally went high. Pursued DE.
DD born at 38w2d on 5-27-16. Finally!!
Pregnant again with OE. EDD 11/9/17 Girl!
Me: 42, DH: 46, Married: 11/12
Losses: MMC#1 11/12 BO, MC#2 11/13 at 8w BO?, MMC#3 8/14 chromo healthy M @12 weeks, stopped growing at 10.
Negligible AMH, FSH finally went high. Pursued DE.
DD born at 38w2d on 5-27-16. Finally!!
Pregnant again with OE. EDD 11/9/17 Girl!
If she keeps saying hurtful things you need to have a talk with her. If she doesn't change and she's affecting your life this much, she needs to go.
DS1 is 7. DD is 1. DS2 is coming in late April.
Nobody needs to justify a C-section. However, I spent hours (and hours, over 6 months) going back and forth with her about whether she wanted one. She ultimately chose it and she's happy with it. I just don't need someone mocking me either for my "looseness" or whatever (since when is that ok?). And she does not feel like she missed out. And I do understand why other ladies do--I would never take that away from them. Anyway, I guess my WTF was poorly taken. And completley misunderstood. I have multiple friends who would have died if that wasn't an option. Ones that can't have kids again bc their insides are messed up. And I don't care if you do choose one, that's your business. Or choose one bc you feel like it, want it, need it, etc. I have never been anything but supportive on this site.
I have chosen to stay friends with her. She's a good person. She just let's thing slip out. Anyway, I'm done. Sorry this offended so many people. I have nothing against anybody's decisions--it's your life.
Me: 42, DH: 46, Married: 11/12
Losses: MMC#1 11/12 BO, MC#2 11/13 at 8w BO?, MMC#3 8/14 chromo healthy M @12 weeks, stopped growing at 10.
Negligible AMH, FSH finally went high. Pursued DE.
DD born at 38w2d on 5-27-16. Finally!!
Pregnant again with OE. EDD 11/9/17 Girl!