AW Baby Showers

tuxielove93 · April 2017

Post some of your favorite baby shower/party photos and stories here!

tuxielove93 · April 2017

I'm pretty sure at least one mom had her shower last weekend, and another one is having one this weekend, and then two of us will be the weekend after, so it's time!!

Some boards have this pinned. Do we want that?

longhairdntcare · April 2017

I don't think it needs to be pinned. People can bump it up as necessary when they post about their shower.

glitterfish-2 · April 2017

rae1-3 said:

I don't think it needs to be pinned. People can bump it up as necessary when they post about their shower.

Thank you!!

yellow1daisy · April 2017

No shower for me but I'll be reading for funsies. And yes, please, no pin!

SaphireSweetie88 · April 2017

rae1-3 said:

I don't think it needs to be pinned. People can bump it up as necessary when they post about their shower.

I agree! I think once the people who are going to have a shower, have theirs, this can quietly fall toward the bottom of the page, etc.

irishrose54 · April 2017

I had my shower this past weekend. It turned out to be a really nice event and my sister and mom did most of the organizing for it. We had nearly 50 people, so the whole opening presents thing was totally overwhelming. lol. It was so amazing to celebrate with everyone after the long journey DH and I went through to get to this point. I got up to say thank you to everyone after the gift opening, and started to ugly cry about how grateful I was and how much it meant to me to have those people there.
We had help getting things back to our place and now I realize just how much work needs to get done before these babies arrive! Nesting mode is on overdrive (but more so in my mind since my body won't let me do too much). Here are a few pics...

Image: https://us.v-cdn.net/5020794/uploads/editor/cs/zn4pk747yi2d.jpg

ericandmaria · April 2017

Fun! Mine will be late on June 10, I'm so busy in May with my husband's graduate school graduation, his birthday and our vacation, with the holiday and all June 10 was the only date we could do it, I know 35 weeks is pushing it but I have no choice; I don't know where it'll be it's a surprise, mom and a few girlfriends are planning it, I hope everyone has a great shower! It's getting so exciting

tuxielove93 · April 2017

@irishrose54 Cute!

Mine is this weekend! I actually found a really cute maxi dress that wasn't maternity to wear.

Re: pinning: I know in general this board isn't a fan of pinned posts. That's why I didn't do it without asking everyone's opinion first

oheliza44 · April 2017

@ericandmaria mine is also June 10. My mom is a teacher and I wanted her to be done with school so she could come for the shower and stay for a few days afterwards to help me get things ready. I'm just praying that the baby doesn't decide to make an early entrance for this and a million other reasons.

@irishrose54 I love the pictures! The set up looks beautiful. Glad you enjoyed your special day.

chiquita928 · April 2017

My family is throwing me a sprinkle, since this baby is a girl, and DS's hand-me-downs can only go so far. They've planned it for June 11th, which is the day after the Relay for Life. I'm a team captain, which means I do a whoooole lot of work, and it's an all-day walking even. I'm going to be 35 weeks. I'm going to be so tired. I know they did this to make it more convenient for some friends who travel, but OMG.

BabyMama4Life · April 2017

I had my first shower a couple weeks ago. My three year old niece stole the show! I forgive her because I don't see her much and well, she's 3. She was very happy to announce that her little baby cousin is coming out of Aunt Sarah's vagina! We'll never forget that one!

julybaby17-2 · April 2017

I had mine today, and it was lovely. My mom and sister planned it, and it was at the same restaurant as my bridal shower. I had friends as well as family come, and it was pretty small, but I get overwhelmed with too many people so it was perfect for me. I couldn't believe how generous everyone was! We received practical girls as well as adorable outfits. I traveled from out of town so getting all this home should be interesting, but we'll figure it out. Now, it's time to set up the nursery!

stokesm21 · April 2017

Baby shower today and I'm super stoked!

satsumasandlemons · April 2017

Cannot believe we're already in the baby shower part of our pregnancies!
Not having a shower, but definitely going to follow this thread

tuxielove93 · May 2017

Baby shower was Saturday! It was a mixed bag. TLDR: Space was tiny, food was scarce, SMIL was a major AW. All the things I expected. But it was still nice. Whole story below the photos for anyone interested in the end to my baby shower drama saga. Top photo is from when DH stopped by at the end to thank everyone. That's his big hairy man arm and hand.

Image: https://us.v-cdn.net/5020794/uploads/editor/87/nti05yqwipdj.jpeg

Image: https://us.v-cdn.net/5020794/uploads/editor/d4/m4aq826r6ssw.jpeg

So quick recap: SMIL was insisting on inviting people I didn't know, the room was super tiny, we had way more guests than the room could even technically fit, and I wasn't going to be able to eat (vegan). The following things all came true:

SMIL was a major AW, and everyone noticed. When it came time to open her gifts, she had to come take multiple photos with me with the gifts, and even pointed to the big one (pack in play) in the photo. Plus, she got into a territory war with DH's grandmother about who has more stuff left over from DH. And she had to announce loudly that the Harry Potter book she gave us for the baby was the one she used to read to DH. And tape a photo of them reading together into the book. And marked all of her gifts with her initials in pen so that "the baby would know that she gave them". Because I'm totally going to keep the boxes and when he's older pull them out and show him that his step gma bought these things that he no longer uses for his baby shower. (please hear the dripping sarcasm) Oh, and the friend she insisted on bringing (who didn't know anyone else) ended up sitting at the wrong shower for a solid ten minutes. There was another baby shower in the building that day, and because she didn't know anyone else, she sat down at that one. Finally found her way to us, but that was kind of my point all along. The other wonderful moment was when her friend finally got there, SMIL said "Oh I'm sure you remember so and so" and before I could even say anything, her friend said "well we only met once a couple of years ago, I'm sure she doesn't remember" and reintroduced herself to me. Shut SMIL up real fast.

The space really was way to small, plus they miscounted and we had to find extra plates, extra chairs, and non-existent extra space for the guests. At least half the room couldn't move for the entire shower. I ended up getting a couple of people drinks because they couldn't get out. And when it was over, there was a few people still sitting and chatting after, and the owner came and kicked them out of the room so they could put it back together, which was super rude. I'm not sure how much you can tell in the photos, but around 26 people had to squeeze into that space. And it was super warm.

From what I hear the food was good. I did get to have some raw veggies and fruit, but by the time I got to home I was starving and had to eat before I could help DH bring in all the stuff.

On a positive note, the decorations were nice, everyone seemed really excited, and we got some super adorable and awesome gifts. Most stand out items were: A handmade quilt from my friend, a teething necklace from MIL, and a 12 months photo frame from my aunt. I didn't ask for or have the teething necklace on my registry, but when MIL and I were in Target a number of weeks ago, I had stopped to look at them and half to myself said that I was going to have to get one. She ran back out and grabbed one for me. Totally unexpected and super nice of her.

My most flame-worthy confession: This actually belongs in FFFC but I won't remember by then. Looking at the stash of stuff I got, I was a little sad/bittersweet. A lot of people bought off registry, especially clothes, and it makes me sad that it wasn't my "perfect baby stash". I love some of the extras/personal stuff, but I spent so much time researching and picking everything out, that I'm just sad that some of the stuff I have isn't the stuff I carefully selected. FTM first world problems. I'm flaming myself for this one. I am really grateful for everything everyone got, and I really shouldn't be complaining. I don't think I even am complaining, just feeling I guess. The stuff is all small and scattered (like Johnson and Johnson baby lotion) so I'm not sure it's really worth taking back.And I feel bad taking the clothes back since everyone clearly picked them out so carefully. Anyways, flame away for that.

ginger1228 · May 2017

@kerils - Your SMIL sounds like a real treat! I can't believe all the "extra" crap she did for attention. Good. Grief.
The tables look really nice! I can tell that it was probably a tight squeeze though!

I don't judge you at all for your confession - I think I'd feel the same way. I would really appreciate any gift, but obviously it's normal to want the stuff you NEED and not the cutesy outfits. I know I'm the parent and it's my job to provide for my child and I'm perfectly fine with that - but there's nothing wrong with wanting the stuff you need over all the other stuff!

tuxielove93 · May 2017

@ginger1228 Oh yeah SMIL is just getting worse by the day. Or my patience has run out. Probably both

And it totally has nothing to do with having to get the stuff, I'm fine with that. Thanks for making me feel better about it and not flaming me. I still feel guilty for feeling that way.

julybaby17-2 · May 2017

@kerils I do understand about the random gifts. I asked for gifts to be mailed, since I flew in for the shower, and a lot of people still brought gifts, which was so unexpected! I got a lot of outfits, but we really need them (I hadn't bought any) so I am pretty excited for them, but I also got a decorative rattle and silver toddler silverwear. I appreciate the sentiment behind it, but what am I supposed to do with this? The baby certainly doesn't need anything this fancy. I feel bad because I know it was expensive, but it will just sit in a drawer somewhere.

glitterfish-2 · May 2017

julybaby17-2 said:

@kerils I do understand about the random gifts. I asked for gifts to be mailed, since I flew in for the shower, and a lot of people still brought gifts, which was so unexpected! I got a lot of outfits, but we really need them (I hadn't bought any) so I am pretty excited for them, but I also got a decorative rattle and silver toddler silverwear. I appreciate the sentiment behind it, but what am I supposed to do with this? The baby certainly doesn't need anything this fancy. I feel bad because I know it was expensive, but it will just sit in a drawer somewhere.

I have a feeling that this toddler silverware is probably the only set, and people just keep regifting it!

ericandmaria · May 2017

@oheliza44 enjoy!

Katie______ · May 2017

So I am not a lurker....I just was off the board during work crazies for the last few weeks! I never had a bridal shower or any of that. My hubby's work is throwing us a baby shower tomorrow (I have seriously never been in the building and in place of their staff meeting they invited me to come into their meeting for a shower!)------so adorable! And this weekend, my two best local friends who I have known for years decided to throw me a shower. It's a brunch- we just moved last August so we don't know anyone (and we're moving to another part of DC area this weekend for our new house....so really lots of moves)- but four or close friends and my MIL and mom----couldn't be more excited! I have never ever had a shower....and now 2! Any advice? Just excited!!!

ginger1228 · May 2017

Welcome back @Katie______!

I don't know if I have any good advice except just enjoy yourself! Take pics with people. Have someone keep track of what gifts you get and from whom so that you can send out thank you cards. That's so helpful! You might want to bring a pad of paper and a pen in case no one thought to do that.

Katie______ · May 2017

@ginger1228
I did go on and see someone may have bought us the baby quilt similar to one we already have (I forgot to update the registry--and was remembering so I went in to make sure I marked it) so I might have a how to deal with if I already have it thing....question. I will bring paper

Thanks! I was sitting looking going look at all the adorable things someone bought us. (PS I know babies can't use a quilt, but I thought I'd hang it on the wall until they got big enough for one.)

Did you send baby themed notes or just regular ones? For our wedding, we had special thank you notes....but we won't have those. (no shower invite formal thing)

ginger1228 · May 2017

I haven't had my shower yet, so I'm basing my advice off my bridal shower and showers I've attended. I think I'd go with whatever is cheaper for thank you cards. Most people are going to throw them away, so if you can get a bigger pack that's less expensive, I would go that route. If you think someone might keep it (like a sentimental parent or grandparent) you could even get a small pack of cuter cards to send to those people and then also get some generic ones. You might even continue to get gifts after your shower when people come visit after baby is born, so you'll want some extra on hand - that way you don't have to run out for cards after baby is born!

If you get duplicates, usually you can return it if it was on your registry. I don't like to ask people for receipts (unless it was like my mom or a super close friend that knew I got duplicates).

If I received two of something at the same shower, I would just say something like "this is great - you can have enough towels/bibs/whatever!" And if someone offers a gift receipt bc they noticed you got duplicates, just graciously accept it. Most people include gift receipts in the card or taped to the package.

tuxielove93 · May 2017

Re: double gifts
At least at BRU and Amazon if its on your registry you can return it no questions asked. No one gave me any gift reciepts, but I was able to return duplicates

Katie______ · May 2017

Thanks. I just asked as they come see the baby and then wondered about you know them looking for x.

ginger1228 · May 2017

Katie______ said:

Thanks. I just asked as they come see the baby and then wondered about you know them looking for x.

I actually don't have good advice for that if it's NOT a duplicate. Like my cousin gave me her old swing, but they smoke. For the life of me, I can't get the dang cover off to wash it (and rewash it!). My MIL bought one from a yard sale the other day that the cover easily comes off so I'll probably end up using that one. I think I'm just going to tell my cousin that MIL didn't know I already had one and I feel obligated to use hers or something.

The quilt is different than a duplicate bc you'll obviously have the other one laying out. How similar are they? Do you think the person will remember exactly what theirs looked like? Or maybe when they come over, take the quilt off the wall and fold it over a chair or something so it's not as easy to see the design!

Katie______ · May 2017

@ginger1228
--we'll see who it's from. I saw it marked purchased. One is a monkey doing something and the other is a guitar playing monkey

Sounds like you have similar issue though except smoke scent is tough!

julybaby17-2 · May 2017

@GlitterFish I really wish that was the case, but it's probably not. She also gave us fancy silverware for our wedding. She just gives strange gifts like this. It's my friends' mom, and my friend explained how they wanted to bring something extra special to the shower in addition to what they mailed. I guess I'll add it to the drawer with the wedding spoons!

carol113 · May 2017

My shower was this past weekend and all went great. I wanted to pass along a tip for those who haven't had their shower yet. My mom had everyone address an envelope to themselves so I had everyone's correct address for sending thank you notes. It's making things much easier since I don't need to track down addresses of her friends.

reneefavron · May 2017

Good to know! Mine won't be until 3 weeks after he gets here so have all the bigger stuff already. Everyone is coming from out of town so up to date addresses are definitely needed. Wanted to do it so everyone can meet him at the same time and save a trip lol

JmUDuuuukes 07 · May 2017

carol113 said:

My shower was this past weekend and all went great. I wanted to pass along a tip for those who haven't had their shower yet. My mom had everyone address an envelope to themselves so I had everyone's correct address for sending thank you notes. It's making things much easier since I don't need to track down addresses of her friends.

Call me a jerk, but I consider this rude. If your family could mail me an invite to spend my time and money on a generous gift, the least you can do is write (or print) my address on a card, don't make me work as a guest. And the "it makes it so much easier for the mom to be" argument many make is weak, because your mom/sister/mil/host could easily do it for you. /end rant

nktrodden826 · May 2017

Same.. @JmUDuuuukes 07

carol113 · May 2017

To each their own. I think it's rather difficult to avoid doing something that someone else might feel is tacky. Maybe someone would think it was tacky that there were shower games, or that alcohol served.

By far one of my worst habits is procrastination. For me, having envelopes ready to go has made it feasible for me to get notes out within the week. Since in my family it's considered rude to take longer than this to send a note, it's the lesser of evils to me. This couples with the fact that I still have a bit of anxiety about getting things ready for baby after multiple loses. Receiving gifts and getting ready for her to hopefully come is accompanied by a bit of stress and anxiety for me rather than the unfiltered joy experienced by many. My mom is certainly aware of my personality and fears, so this was her trying to be a mom and make things easier for me by removing a barrier. Sure, maybe she could have just addressed them all herself, but clearly that wasn't thought of at the time. I guess I could have added all this detail to my original post, but was trying to keep things light and pass on a suggestion that someone might find useful.

JmUDuuuukes 07 · May 2017

I'm sorry for your lossesn. I'm sure this has been difficult from the start and I can't begin to imagine how you have been managing it.

To be fair, I didn't say tacky, I said rude. There is a difference. But lucky for you, you weren't the rude one, your mom was. If your mom is aware of your tendencies, she should have addressed the envelopes for you, and could have done so before the shower, knowing who would be in attendance and handed them to you on your way out. You're trying to pass along useful info, and I'm trying to prevent others from also being rude.

Shower games, alcohol, etc, are a matter of preference and social norms in your area/family/circle of friends. Asking guests to bring you a gift, then address the envelope isn't the same-it's asking them to do something you would normally have to do for yourself. You may as well ask them to fill out the envelope with the gift they brought and then hand it out at the end of the shower to save a stamp.

CPR79 · May 2017

I've been at showers where the envelope thing is done as a game. They have people fill out the envelopes themselves and then draw door prize winners from them. I have problems in general with showers in that it could be considered 'rude' to invite people to a party and give them a list of gifts you want, but I'm sucking it up for the baby shower because my mom was really excited to throw one (I did not have a bridal shower). So I don't think the envelope thing is any more or less rude/tacky, as long as you're feeding people and making sure they have a nice time, you're good.

postywiththemosty · May 2017

I'm not a fan of the envelope thing. I feel like if you sent an invitation already, you should have their address. Some people do e-vites I guess, but still. If you can invite people to give you a gift, you can address the thank you card yourself. I'm sure people have their reasons for doing it, but I agree with @JmUDuuuukes 07 that it comes across as rude.

crzyforbabies · May 2017

I went to a huge baby shower where the mom had us fill out envelopes. I thought it was a great idea, and I was not offended at all. Since my shower will be a smaller house party, I think I will skip it. I have a Google Drive of all the addresses we sent invitations to, so that should make my life a little easier.

I will have my shower next weekend, but I don't have high hopes. My mom and sister are hosting it, and I had to give them friendly reminders to please send the invitations out. I shouldn't have had to do that, but I knew if I didn't, they wouldn't send the invitations until the last minute. As it was, they were sent barely a month out with no registry information. I know I should be grateful, but I feel like my shower is an afterthought because I am the second daughter to have children. My bridal shower proceedings went the same way. The invitations were sent out suuuuuuper late, and my sister didn't invite my grandma against my wishes because she was mad at her. I keep telling myself that this is the last party I will need to rely on my family to throw, and that my daughter will have a beautiful and carefully planned shower.

mamadcb · May 2017

I do see the point that @JmUDuuuukes 07 is making, but I have been to showers where I addessed my own envelope and didn't think twice about it. If anything I was happy to spare the mom-to-be a step in the thank you process. I think generally the people who are invited to and choose to attend a baby shower would feel the same way. So while it may not pass an etiquette test I doubt you have offended your guests, @carol113. You know them better than we do anyway.

BabyMama4Life · May 2017

My gfs threw me a shower on Saturday. I felt so loved and special until.... I realized that my bff was drunk. I worked hard to quit drinking a year and a half ago and requested no drinks at the shower. Turns out she started drinking while at Costco at 9am. Had a huge bottle of wine stowed away and was drinking throughout the day.

I got upset with her later in the day when she wanted my DH to walk her to the bar to meet another friend. I said no. Her response was to tell mutual friends that I'm ungrateful. It's super upsetting to me. Never expected this.

I'm taking a break from her and recognizing that her drinking is her problem. Not mine to deal with.

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