September 2017 Moms

The Down and Dirty on.... Breastfeeding!

2

Re: The Down and Dirty on.... Breastfeeding!

  • @stephy_p did I answer your question okay? Was there another reason you were worried about that? 
  • @wyomama0427 Yes! Thank you for your answer. That's kind of how I imagined it will be like for me. I think it will be less bothersome for me because I already am feeling that instinct to want to feed my baby. I am also wondering how my husband is going to react.  I think my worry with that is that he is going to be grossed out or creeped out by my boobs. But maybe boobs are boobs to men and typically don't really care?
    BabyFetus Ticker
    Me: 34 | DH: 31
    Married: Nov. 7, 2015
    TTC Since: February, 2016
    BFP: December 20, 2016



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  • This may be TMI but a few times during sex DH would squeeze too hard and get sprayed and I think once or twice he got an accidental taste. He was never bothered by it and he even told me once how sweet breastmilk is lol. I was more the one saying boobies were off limits during sex just because they didn't feel sexual anymore and it felt off, but that went away after weaning and I enjoyed boob play once more. 
  • @TLooney17 still nursing and he is 16 mths. I honestly don't enjoy it anymore because it hurts so bad. Also he only nurses from one side because the other side is apparently not giving him enough. I know my supply is diminishing because as much as he wants to nurse he gets frustrated now and usually rolls over and stares at me until he falls asleep. I should add that he is only nursing at bedtime and sometimes on the weekends for naps. 
  • tfrangul said:
    @TLooney17 still nursing and he is 16 mths. I honestly don't enjoy it anymore because it hurts so bad. Also he only nurses from one side because the other side is apparently not giving him enough. I know my supply is diminishing because as much as he wants to nurse he gets frustrated now and usually rolls over and stares at me until he falls asleep. I should add that he is only nursing at bedtime and sometimes on the weekends for naps. 
    This is what we were doing. Honestly it was so much easier when we weaned! DH took over bedtime for a while and I slept in the guest room, we didn't mean to wean completely but because he was only nursing for comfort at bedtime he just gave it up altogether. Never asked to nurse again. Kind of bittersweet but I'm so glad for the break my poor boobies get before the next sweet babe.
  • Really dumb question, but if it takes a couple of days for your milk to come in, how does the lactation consultant at the hospital help you get started with breastfeeding? Unless, of course, you have a longer stay in the hospital.
    Lilypie Pregnancy tickers
  • @wyomama0427 Now that my husband is well again this will be something that needs to be done sooner rather than later. He goes to bed no problem for his daddy so I know it will be ok. It will be kind of bitter sweet but yes my boobs and my sanity need a little break before this little girl comes!
  • When using nipple creams, do you make sure you wash it all off before breastfeeding so baby doesn't ingest any of it? Is it safe if baby gets some in their mouth? I feel like constantly wiping/washing the lotion off the nipples would only further irritate them. Mine are already looking dry, although not painful, and I'm anticipating this to get worse!
  • +1 for lanolin! 
    Lilypie Maternity tickers
  • Thank you ladies!!
  • lap018 said:
    jenn622-2 said:
    When using nipple creams, do you make sure you wash it all off before breastfeeding so baby doesn't ingest any of it? Is it safe if baby gets some in their mouth? I feel like constantly wiping/washing the lotion off the nipples would only further irritate them. Mine are already looking dry, although not painful, and I'm anticipating this to get worse!
    Lanolin is safe for baby to ingest, you do not need to wipe it off. If you get any other nipple cream you need to read their instructions and it will tell you whether you need to wipe off or not.
    Also, it works really well if your baby gets chapped lips, just put some lanolin on your nips before you nurse! 
  • Really dumb question, but if it takes a couple of days for your milk to come in, how does the lactation consultant at the hospital help you get started with breastfeeding? Unless, of course, you have a longer stay in the hospital.
    The way we talk about breastmilk is confusing. You technically have a supply of milk waiting for baby to be born and this is the colostrum, which is fatty and protein rich part of your breastmilk. It is thick and comes out in tiny amounts. Over the next few days a different type of milk comes in, in larger amounts. 

    I meant to post this hours ago. 
  • Does anyone have recommendation for certain types of clothes that you found helpful for nursing, both during your hospital stay and once you were home? Obviously a nursing bra, but what about the tank tops with clips, wrap tops, etc?
  • Does anyone have recommendation for certain types of clothes that you found helpful for nursing, both during your hospital stay and once you were home? Obviously a nursing bra, but what about the tank tops with clips, wrap tops, etc?
    Honestly toward the end of my BF relationship with DS I could nurse in just about anything. Low necklines are good for just pulling out the boob but if you want something more discreet I'd look into nursing clothes
  • I think target has some good nursing tanks you could look into those, I'll probably get a few of those 
  • I'm a surrogate for my sister, and we are trying to decide what to do about breastfeeding. She asked me what I'm thinking about it, and I just don know... but I know she wants me to do it. I get that it's good for the baby, and I get that my boobs are going to be making the milk anyway, so it ought to get used. But honestly I'm not going to be spending every day with this baby, as it's not my child, it is the child of my sister and her husband! So, I could pump, and bring the milk to her weekly or something? That's probably what will happen.

    But how long should I be doing that? Honestly, now that I've looked into how often I would need to pump, I'm SUPER not-excited to keep doing it for a year+... and yea, I feel really selfish for thinking like that! But honestly I work full time and have my own life, and I'm already taking a lot of time and energy away from my own career and relationships and hobbies to carry a child for 9 months, and do "baby things" with her, as well as going on maternity leave for several weeks to recover from birth... so another year or more of pumping multiple times a day sounds not fun. 

    So, if you were my sister, and you were asking your surrogate what they feel about breath feeding, what answer would you be happy with? Like, if I say three months, is that reasonable??? And for that matter, would it be comfortable for me to essentially "ween" my breasts in that amount of time? And am I a jerk for not wanting to provide breastmilk for this baby?
  • @lexibelly I think pumping would be an extremely generous thing to do. I pumped for my DS for a whole year, and it's seriously a time commitment. There were many days that I thought about stopping, but I greatly missed my baby while I was working and it felt like something I could do to help me feel connected to him while at work. On a selfish note, it helped me lose a ton of weight, which I didn't hate either. I think that 3-6 months would be plenty generous, and I think that will give your breasts enough time expressing milk so that you don't risk mastitis. If you don't want to pump at all, I still feel like that's entirely reasonable too, you've already done more than enough by being a surrogate to your sister. Pumping is a huge time commitment and I feel like after carrying a baby for 9 months, you've done plenty, and shouldn't feel like you need to commit 3-6 more months of pumping if you don't feel up to it. I think its whatever you feel comfortable with, but by no means should you feel bad with whatever you choose to do.
  • @lexibelly I think you're already doing a very generous and selfless thing for your sister, and you shouldn't feel obligated to do anything more. If you're up for doing some pumping, I think that's great, but if you didn't want to do any, I think it's also totally ok. I think if I were you I would agree to pump while I was still on leave from work, but stop after that. I'm a FTM, but all the moms I know really hated pumping when they went back to work, so I think it would be a lot to ask for you to have to do it.
  • @lexibelly I agree with the above statembt. You are providing a beautiful thing already so i wouldn't feel selfish for not wanting to. But echoing what pp said. Breast feeding/pumping can do wonders on weight loss after pregnancy. Maybe if you wanted to pump for a few months but also have your sister start looking into milk banks. Check where you will be delivering and see what they suggest as well as far as donated milk goes. My neighbor donated a bunch of milk to me for my son because I was having a hard time the first couple months. Ha now he's 17 mths and he still nurses, but not for long! Lol. So anyway sorry to be long winded. But there really are great options to receiving donated milk as well. 
  • @lexibelly- what you are doing for your sister is amazing. Seriously. I hate pumping and I would have to seriously think about doing it for a baby that wasn't mine to keep.

    Can I ask if you are getting any sort of compensation from her? That could change my answer. But if you are doing it out of the kindness of your own heart, I can't say I would commit to to pumping for more than a few months. Any more than that is just a lot, on top of what you are already doing.
  • @lexibelly can you be super vague and non-commottal for now?
    "oh, I hadn't really considered breast milk before...some people have no trouble getting a supply and some people do, so let's see how my body reacts."
    i echo pp: you don't owe breast milk, it would be a super nice and generous bonus, but imo you don't owe it unless you had some sort of agreement including feeding procedures prior to becoming pregnant.

    also, some of my friends who are bfing said they get WAY less milk when they're away from the baby (they said looking at pictures or watching a video of the baby nursing helps a bit, but still not their normal full supply), so since you're not going to be with the baby non stop, I would hate for you to commit to doing something so generous and then not be able to follow through even if you wanted to just in case your sis doesn't fully understand and it causes any tension.

    TTGP history (*TW*):

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    Spontaneous BFP #2 January 2017: Rainbow Baby Boy September 2017
    BFP #3 November 2018: Baby #2 expected August 2019


  • A question for STMs: did you take a breastfeeding class before your first baby was born? If yes, did you think it was helpful? If no, did you wish you did?
  • @Rhubarb7216- I took one at the hospital, it was like 30 bucks and took 2 hours. It was helpful, just to kind of see what to expect. Not sure it is really 100% necessary, but I don't feel like it was a waste. I do think that whatever issues you may have with BF'ing, they are likely to be very specific to the baby and the circumstances, which you can't really know ahead of time. I would insist on meeting with LCs before you leave the hospital after the baby is born, though.
  • jlf1019jlf1019 member
    What an amazing thing you are doing for your sister! I would tell her something like "I haven't really thought about it all that much. I do know that pumping is a huge time commitment, so it's a bit daunting. It may be something I can make work while I'm still out on leave, but I'm sure how long I could extend it after that once I'm back into my regular work and life routine."

    I'm not sure how it would even work with an employer anyway? Would they be required to give you pump breaks the same way they give mothers breaks? 
  • @Rhubarb7216 I didn't do a class but our prenatal class touched on it a bit. Our local health unit has a drop-in baby clinic every week day with public health nurses who are also LCs. We went there a few days after DS was born and they checked our latch and positioning. 
    Lilypie Maternity tickers
  • mc123mcmc123mc member
    I am a STM so this is my advice: It's totally OK to give your baby formula, as a supplement or if breast feeding just doesn't work for you. My daughter had a great latch but my supply was low, the whole time. I felt terrible about giving her formula until one day I just realized, my baby is happier when she's full and no matter how hard I try, I can't make enough to get her full so I'll do what I can and let formula do the rest. She gained weight appropriately and I was less stressed, win for all. It was hard for me to come to that conclusion though because I felt I was failing if I used formula. Know that you are not failing if you use formula!! 

    Also I hated the lanolin nipple cream. it was so sticky and I didn't feel like it helped. Switched to coconut oil and felt much better!! 

    I had no idea why the lactation consultants kept coming to see me in the hospital so I didn't use them! When they come around, try to feed the baby, even if he/she has just fed. Ask them all the questions. Get their numbers! Ask about side laying pose and other reclined positions. Help soooo much when you are super tired. 

    Buy PJ's that button down in the front. I lived in mine for the first few weeks and slept in that kind of top until I was done nursing. 

    Ask your insurance about what is covered for breast pumps, especially moms that will go back to work. Mine covered a regular dual electric pump AND a hospital grade pump for a year so I got both. Used the hospital grade pump at home and brought the electric pump to work. Also, you do not need to wash your pump stuff after every session, just put it in a big ziploc and put it in the fridge. This allowed me to wash pump parts once a day instead of like 5 times!! 
  • @rhubarb123 I did not take any classes ever. I also don't regret it. I'm super weird like that though. I would just do what you think is best for your personality. I did use the lactation consultants at the hospital but I also didn't have any issues. So they would just come in and ask if everything was ok. 
  • mc123mc said:
    Also I hated the lanolin nipple cream. it was so sticky and I didn't feel like it helped. Switched to coconut oil and felt much better!! 
    I'm just going to say that lanolin did absolutely nothing for me. It think it can be a lot of trial and error to figure out what works. For me, a combination of breast milk and coconut oil worked the best to prevent me from getting too dry and cracked (once I healed from having been previously dry and cracked).
    mc123mc said:
    Also, you do not need to wash your pump stuff after every session, just put it in a big ziploc and put it in the fridge. This allowed me to wash pump parts once a day instead of like 5 times!! 
    And this.
    mc123mc said:
    I am a STM so this is my advice: It's totally OK to give your baby formula, as a supplement or if breast feeding just doesn't work for you.
    And so very much this. And also, if your doctors aren't 100% supportive of you in going the formula route when you want/need to, maybe get a different doctor. Nothing made me feel better in the beginning than when we went to the 2 week checkup and the super crunchy pediatrician said to my super crunchy, but also super stressed, self "You do know it's okay to give baby formula, right?" That's when I knew we had found the absolute right doctor.

    **TW**
    Me & DH: 32
    Married 2013
    Kiddo #1: Sept 2015
    BFP: 1/19, EDD: 9/30

    "I'm having fruit salad for dinner. Well, it's mostly just grapes, actually. Ok all grapes. Fermented grapes. Fine, I'm having wine for dinner."
  • @Rhubarb7216 I read a book. Didn't take a class, but I was stuck on bedrest when it was scheduled. I think I read The Womanly Art of Breastfeeding.
  • Just thought is share this tidbit from a Mayo Clinic article, because of my experiences with breastfeeding. 

    "How should I handle negative reactions to extended breast-feeding?

    Worldwide, babies are weaned on average between ages 2 and 4. In some cultures, breast-feeding continues until children are age 6 or 7. In other parts of the world, however, extended breast-feeding is less common and can sometimes provoke uninformed, negative reactions.

    How long you breast-feed is up to you and your baby. If loved ones — and even strangers — share their opinions about when to wean, remind them that the decision is yours. Try not to worry about what other people think. Instead, trust your instincts.

    Extended breast-feeding can be an intimate way to continue nurturing your baby. If you're considering extended breast-feeding, think about what's best for both you and your baby — and enjoy this special time together."

    https://www.mayoclinic.org/healthy-lifestyle/infant-and-toddler-health/in-depth/extended-breastfeeding/art-20046962?pg=2

  • @lexibelly You're an amazing person! 

    Regarding extended breast-feeding, especially in some other parts of the world: if you're available food in your country was scarce or whatever and you had the ability to continue making milk for your children, I would sure as hell breastfeed until they refused to anymore. What an interesting thought - I had never thought about that. I think in America food is so much more readily available that we get our kids on it sooner and then question why you would keep breastfeeding when the kid "could eat solid food".

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  • I have no idea what to expect with breastfeeding, but I'm going to give it "the old college try" and hope it works out for at least 6 months.  My mom had a low supply so I'm anticipating that as a possible concern.  Good to know that you can mix giving formula with breastfeeding so you don't have to worry about baby not getting enough nourishment one way or another!  I have a prenatal appointment with a pediatrician later this month and these are good questions to ask her opinion on, too.

    Might be silly to ask but I never like wearing a bra at night -- will I have to once the baby arrives because otherwise I'll leak?  Again, no idea what to expect, but it's always a relief to take my bra off at night, so I'm hoping that won't have to change...

    Thanks for advice on tanks from Target, among many other things!
  • @margareth It will really depend on your body, but you'll probably want to wear something to keep a nursing pad in while you sleep. I got these sleep bras and they were awesome: https://www.target.com/p/nursing-sleep-bra-2pk-gilligan-o-malley/-/A-16754657
    They weren't super supportive or anything but enough for sleeping and the MOTN feeds. But soft and comfy!
    Lilypie Maternity tickers
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