I just started a new job (accepted before I knew I was pregnant...whoops.) in March, with a company that has less that 50 employees, so I won't be eligible for FMLA on any front.
The policy per per the employee handbook is 3 weeks of paid leave, but by paid they mean paid out of your accrued PTO and sick days. And the policy doesn't mention anything about unpaid leave.
I haven't told them I'm pregnant yet, probably will in the next few weeks. Honestly not sure how this will pan out - there's no way I can only take 3 weeks! I'm a FTM, our closest family is 90 minutes away, and I don't see any daycares around that will take a baby before 3 months. Here's hoping their policy is just super out of date and they'll be willing to work with me.
Depending on when LO is born, I can and must use up my sick days up to 30 working days within the 6 - 8 week disability period (2 extra weeks if c-section). I cannot use more than 30 days to get full pay by my district, even if I have more days saved (which I do). I can use that time off before birth, which I think is dumb unless I need it.
I have a private short-term disability insurance policy that I pay into. It will kick in after two weeks and will pay me $100 / day for I believe 6 weeks, so weeks 2-8.
NJ will offer up to $615/week or 2/3 of pay for 6 weeks, whichever is less. However, it is not usually received until so late that most women are already back at work.
After that, NJ/FMLA will let me take 6 more weeks of unpaid leave. When I'm done, my contract allows me to take more unpaid time off if my district approves. I don't think I will and will probably return right before spring break in March or right after in April. Then I will work until we get out from June to September.
It's funny how it's the little things in life that mean the most...not where you live, or what you drive, or the price tag on your clothes... There's no dollar sign on a piece of mind, this I've come to know! *ZBB*
I get 6 weeks paid with vaginal birth, 8 with a c-section. However they stop paying bonus the day we go out till the day we come back so if I take more time it's costing me salary + bonus. They recently changed this and it makes me so mad. We used to not lose bonus dollars because we worked for that $ before leave technically.
Adding to my response: I can take up to 12 weeks but I very likely will not. Not sure how long I'll take but I also WFH and travel a few days a week I could be home some days "catching up" in the beginning when I return to work.
@DuchessofCambridge I saw that about NY. We're hoping to get stationed there next year since we have to go to GA for 6 months but that would definitely help with LO #2.
We're moving to GA for only 6 months so I won't be working. I figured trying to find a job at 20 weeks would be hard and then to have a baby in Nov. and leave in Jan. would be hard to justify. Thankfully I don't need to work for us to financially be okay and we have a large savings, although this move will be expensive with having to buy furniture since most of ours is included with our apartment here. We don't know where we're going after January but I'd like to go back to work part time. I enjoy working plus I just finished my Masters and want to actually use it. DH should get promoted a few months after that so money wouldn't be an issue at all.
I work for the fedal government and we get absolutely no paid leave. There have been various bills about giving 6 weeks paid maternity leave introduced a couple of times, but so far, nothing. Thankfully, I did roll over about 30 vacation days and I have about 30 sick days saved up (we've been TTC for a long time - a lot of planning went into this munchkin!). My goal is to head back mid-March and hopefully DH will be able to take off 2 weeks.
DH & me - 31.
BFP #1 09/27/14 -- MMC 5w (discovered 8w) IUI #1 - #4 - bfn (late 2015 to early 2016) 01/03/17 - 12mm x 6mm polyp removed from uterus- neg path, yay! IUI #5 - February 2017. Hoping for some magic 02.22.17 - BFP! EDD 11/01/17
This all makes me so sad. I am heartbroken we don't have the opportunity to spend more time with our babies should we want it and that DH has even less time than I do. It's not fair. I would gladly give up some money out of every paycheck so my company could pay for everyone's leave, men and women alike.
@slaven Have you looked into furniture rental? I sublet my apartment once as a corporate rental and the company paid to bring furniture for the girl for five months. They delivered and picked up.
It's funny how it's the little things in life that mean the most...not where you live, or what you drive, or the price tag on your clothes... There's no dollar sign on a piece of mind, this I've come to know! *ZBB*
I've been avoiding really thinking about this. I'm a 9-mo university employee so most women try to give birth May-July. I tried but failed. Ultimately we decided that work isn't as important as family, but of course it does add some wrinkles. I'm in a specialized area and there simply is no one who could sub to cover, AND I cannot not offer these certain specialized classes bc they are required for graduation for a subset of students. So while I'll relax other duties, I will need to finish out fall classes, likely taking 1-2 w totally off depending. Just not sure how they will want to compensate part-time. I'll talk to HR soon, but won't tell anyone else until I know enough to go in and say what I plan to do (rather than have them decide for me).
@NYTino24 We need furniture anyway. It is a pain to move but the Army pays for that. Here we get furniture for free but that's not the case when you're stationed Stateside. Renting would be nice for 6 months but that just pushes off the inevitable, and then we have 6 months of rental furniture payments. Before we got married I lived with my parents and DH lived with his parents until going active duty. We came to Korea right away and got a few things but we put off buying furniture because there isn't a good selection here or what we like is over priced.
At least we're against bed frames so that's one less purchase. We've broken a few already
It's funny how it's the little things in life that mean the most...not where you live, or what you drive, or the price tag on your clothes... There's no dollar sign on a piece of mind, this I've come to know! *ZBB*
@car1a it's interesting you posted that bc I was asked to ne an instructor for the fall semester and our University told me that I couldn't unless I forfeited my FMLA (note I have enough leave to cover 18 weeks but FMLA only protects my job for 12 and all our policy allows) for my "day job" at the University. So basically to ensure my full time position is protected I have to give up teaching for the fall semester.
I get up to 8 weeks paid for STD and then can use accumulated PTO for an additional 12 weeks or can take it unpaid. Thank goodness my company gives us an extra 2 weeks paid at 100% for parental leave. I'm planning on just using the 10 weeks between STD and parental leave and saving the fmla for intermittent bonding time for the next year. It has been an absolute life saver during my lo's first year with dr appts, colds, teething, etc. With the intermittent bonding (fmla) I can use paid time throughout the year as it accumulates.
@captainfoxtrot Fortunately, my DH works in education too. So over the course of my maternity leave, he will have 4 weeks off due to standard breaks. He will also take 1 week off right after birth.
My husband got 3 months last time in paternity which is the best I've seen so far so he stayed home when I went back to work. He was working for a Swiss co at that time so go figure. He will get around 2 months this time which I suppose he will again use when I go back to work. So in all between the two of us we manage 6-8 months of parental leave.
@jess0211 Yes, the university is an odd beast in these situations with no good policy. For the most part I make my own schedule and need to get my work done at a high level but no one monitors my hours, so in that sense it's great because it's flexible (mind you, I've been grading for 2h already this morning - but of course that's my choice to do it now while I have energy). But it's not like I take sick leave for doctor's appointments, since I already work well over 40h/week that'd be ridiculous to claim some type of "work release" - it's just not that type of 9-5/set hours job. But because of this, it makes maternity or other STD leave very unusual (unless you were to take an entire semester off, which if this were a Sept baby I definitely would've). I honestly think I'll just need to carry on but reduce any other obligations besides teaching/grading to an absolute minimum for the last month of the Fall semester, and mostly do my work from home and have my DH stay home when I do go in. I can get most of my research on auto-pilot and have students send me data. It's maybe not ideal, but the only ideal situation would be a summer baby and that just wasn't working for us!
@jess0211 I'm still trying to wrap my head around your situation. So if you taught also, is the assumption that you'd continue that after LO arrives? So then FMLA is void for your typical position because you're still working part time?
My husband will get 6 weeks paid. But we are not sure when he will take the majority of it. I will have so much for him to do he'd probably rather be working.
I've been avoiding this thread because the thought just stresses me out. I'm a partially SAHM so obviously no help from work during my time off since I'm only part time, but even my part time income is something we depend on. I've really thought about doing a call center job during those first few weeks/months so I can still have income while working from home.
DH got literally no time off last time. They called him the day our son was born and asked him to come in, he said no of course but had to go back 2 days later. Since he's opening his own restaurant this summer he'll get no real time off again. Luckily my mom has promised to come help for a big chunk of time.
DH works 24 on and 72 off. He will have the day the baby is born off if he's working. He would have to wait until he has coverage if he needs to leave during a shift. If I'm not in labor or delivering on a work day, he gets nothing. He has a landscaping business that he works 2-3 days a week when he isn't firefighting, so that has to get done when weather permits. He has a promotional test to take around when I'm due and it's only given once every three years. Should be interesting!
It's funny how it's the little things in life that mean the most...not where you live, or what you drive, or the price tag on your clothes... There's no dollar sign on a piece of mind, this I've come to know! *ZBB*
@NYTino24 my DH has the same issues as yours. He's a paramedic and he'll be fighting to get paid time off. He'll have to use some vacation time the week the baby is born, but he won't get more than a few days off.
Normally DH would get at least 10 days of paternity leave but he will be in class/training and can't miss it so he doesn't get to use it. I have heard rumors of the Army upping it to 14 days for non-primary care givers. Moms get 12 weeks after delivery.
@BayCamp I'm thinking of a work from home call center type thing too. DH doesn't get time off for this LO but our parents are each coming down for a week, at separate times, to help.
DH gets zero time. With both of our others, he went back to work the very next day. Luckily for our second, MIL was staying with us to help and get DD to daycare and stuff.
@cmessamore What did you do when the other kids were born?
It's funny how it's the little things in life that mean the most...not where you live, or what you drive, or the price tag on your clothes... There's no dollar sign on a piece of mind, this I've come to know! *ZBB*
DS1&2 were with my ex, but with DS3 he had to leave work with a family emergency when I was in labor. He took off the next 4 days (3 of which lined up with his schedule amazingly). Then he went back to work. It was rough, but we made it through. Fortunately, he was born in August, so the other kiddos didn't have anywhere they had to be. With this LO, it'll be tougher since all the kids will need to get to school and such.
I get 12 weeks unpaid. And they don't work with holidays. I have no idea what, if anything, DH gets. That said, we're hoping for me to SAH... So now the questions is: "When do I tell my bosses?" I'm a bookkeeper and I'll be leaving at our busiest time of year. Oct - January is the worst as a bookkeeper cause you have to finish 3rd and 4th quarter reports and payroll taxes and all the W2s plus get all the write up stragglers from the year caught up so the CPAs can file taxes before April. I want to tell them soon enough to let them get someone in and trained, but not so soon that they let me go before I want to leave... thoughts? EDD 11/4.
~Ziggy
Me:27 (diagnosed anovulatory May 2016) DH:29 (normal) Met 2008 | Dated 2010 | Married 2012 TTC#1 since June 2015 June 2016- 50mg generic clomid CDs 5-9 w/TI | 2 follies (14 & 12), thin (2.45) lining | BFN July 2016- 1mg estradiol CDs 1-7, 50mg generic clomid CDs 5-9 w/TI | 2 follies (14 & 10), thin (~4) lining | BFN August 2016- 1mg estradiol CDs 1-7, 50mg generic clomid CDs 5-9 w/TI | BFN | Referred to specialist, visited once, was told we have less than a 3% chance even on medication, recommended to IUI for up to a 50% chance, decided not to pursue at this time | Stopped "trying" October 2016- We became licensed foster parents November 9, 2016- Arrival of DD#1, 4yo March 1, 2017- 1 day late, feel like crap (low fever & exhausted) | Mom suggested test before taking meds, I laughed but did it anyway | BFP! *shock*
@zigzag8412 If you aren't planning to go back and are worried they will let you go, just don't tell them. I get that you want them to be prepared, but why care so much about them if you think they care little enough about you to let you go?
@zigzag8412 as @kissthesky32 said, I wouldn't tell them. If you are really worried about them having a replacement, then I wouldn't tell them you aren't planning on coming back. i'm also going to be out during our busy season and I was nervous about it but my boss was super sweet and said it didn't matter. My director on the other hand, made a comment. Eye roll. Not planning my family around your budget season.
I don't know. They're good people, they just also are a small business and have to look out for their interests. They probably wouldn't, I'm just paranoid.
ETA- also, we don't have HR...
~Ziggy
Me:27 (diagnosed anovulatory May 2016) DH:29 (normal) Met 2008 | Dated 2010 | Married 2012 TTC#1 since June 2015 June 2016- 50mg generic clomid CDs 5-9 w/TI | 2 follies (14 & 12), thin (2.45) lining | BFN July 2016- 1mg estradiol CDs 1-7, 50mg generic clomid CDs 5-9 w/TI | 2 follies (14 & 10), thin (~4) lining | BFN August 2016- 1mg estradiol CDs 1-7, 50mg generic clomid CDs 5-9 w/TI | BFN | Referred to specialist, visited once, was told we have less than a 3% chance even on medication, recommended to IUI for up to a 50% chance, decided not to pursue at this time | Stopped "trying" October 2016- We became licensed foster parents November 9, 2016- Arrival of DD#1, 4yo March 1, 2017- 1 day late, feel like crap (low fever & exhausted) | Mom suggested test before taking meds, I laughed but did it anyway | BFP! *shock*
@dragonfly87 You're right. It could expose them to a big lawsuit but if she lives in an at will state, it will be an uphill battle to sue them. It's been done before and can happen but it won't be easy.
@CubsFan7 yes it would be an uphill battle. But the org I run is in an at will state and we have had difficulties letting go of non-performing employees who are pregnant. She could utilize ACLU or other orgs that represent employee rights if she had to deal with it. It isn't necessarily easy, but it's possible.
Re: Maternity Leave Woes
The policy per per the employee handbook is 3 weeks of paid leave, but by paid they mean paid out of your accrued PTO and sick days. And the policy doesn't mention anything about unpaid leave.
I haven't told them I'm pregnant yet, probably will in the next few weeks. Honestly not sure how this will pan out - there's no way I can only take 3 weeks! I'm a FTM, our closest family is 90 minutes away, and I don't see any daycares around that will take a baby before 3 months. Here's hoping their policy is just super out of date and they'll be willing to work with me.
I have a private short-term disability insurance policy that I pay into. It will kick in after two weeks and will pay me $100 / day for I believe 6 weeks, so weeks 2-8.
NJ will offer up to $615/week or 2/3 of pay for 6 weeks, whichever is less. However, it is not usually received until so late that most women are already back at work.
After that, NJ/FMLA will let me take 6 more weeks of unpaid leave. When I'm done, my contract allows me to take more unpaid time off if my district approves. I don't think I will and will probably return right before spring break in March or right after in April. Then I will work until we get out from June to September.
TTC 9/2016 BFP 12/9/16 EDD 8/21/17 NMC 1/8/16 at 7w6d
TTC 2/2017 BFP 3/6/17 EDD 11/17/17 DS born 11/25/17 via ECS
TTC 12/2018 BFP 6/2/19 EDD 2/12/20 NMC / BO at 7 weeks, low progesterone
TTC 7/2019 BFP 8/21/19 EDD 4/22/20 CP at 5 weeks
TTC 8/19 IUI #1 w/ Clomid + Ovidrel + progesterone BFN, IUI 2 and 3 w/ Letrozole + Ovidrel + progesterone,
IUI 4 Follistim + Ovidrel + progesterone BFP 1/9/20 EDD 9/18/20
AMA, ITP in pregnancy, vWD type II - low Factor VIII, unexplained RPL and secondary infertility
We used to not lose bonus dollars because we worked for that $ before leave technically.
@DuchessofCambridge I saw that about NY. We're hoping to get stationed there next year since we have to go to GA for 6 months but that would definitely help with LO #2.
We're moving to GA for only 6 months so I won't be working. I figured trying to find a job at 20 weeks would be hard and then to have a baby in Nov. and leave in Jan. would be hard to justify. Thankfully I don't need to work for us to financially be okay and we have a large savings, although this move will be expensive with having to buy furniture since most of ours is included with our apartment here. We don't know where we're going after January but I'd like to go back to work part time. I enjoy working plus I just finished my Masters and want to actually use it. DH should get promoted a few months after that so money wouldn't be an issue at all.
TTC since August 2018
IUI #1 - #4 - bfn (late 2015 to early 2016)
01/03/17 - 12mm x 6mm polyp removed from uterus- neg path, yay!
IUI #5 - February 2017. Hoping for some magic
02.22.17 - BFP! EDD 11/01/17
Baby G has arrived! 10/14/17
TTC 9/2016 BFP 12/9/16 EDD 8/21/17 NMC 1/8/16 at 7w6d
TTC 2/2017 BFP 3/6/17 EDD 11/17/17 DS born 11/25/17 via ECS
TTC 12/2018 BFP 6/2/19 EDD 2/12/20 NMC / BO at 7 weeks, low progesterone
TTC 7/2019 BFP 8/21/19 EDD 4/22/20 CP at 5 weeks
TTC 8/19 IUI #1 w/ Clomid + Ovidrel + progesterone BFN, IUI 2 and 3 w/ Letrozole + Ovidrel + progesterone,
IUI 4 Follistim + Ovidrel + progesterone BFP 1/9/20 EDD 9/18/20
AMA, ITP in pregnancy, vWD type II - low Factor VIII, unexplained RPL and secondary infertility
@NYTino24 We need furniture anyway. It is a pain to move but the Army pays for that. Here we get furniture for free but that's not the case when you're stationed Stateside. Renting would be nice for 6 months but that just pushes off the inevitable, and then we have 6 months of rental furniture payments. Before we got married I lived with my parents and DH lived with his parents until going active duty. We came to Korea right away and got a few things but we put off buying furniture because there isn't a good selection here or what we like is over priced.
At least we're against bed frames so that's one less purchase. We've broken a few already
TTC since August 2018
TTC 9/2016 BFP 12/9/16 EDD 8/21/17 NMC 1/8/16 at 7w6d
TTC 2/2017 BFP 3/6/17 EDD 11/17/17 DS born 11/25/17 via ECS
TTC 12/2018 BFP 6/2/19 EDD 2/12/20 NMC / BO at 7 weeks, low progesterone
TTC 7/2019 BFP 8/21/19 EDD 4/22/20 CP at 5 weeks
TTC 8/19 IUI #1 w/ Clomid + Ovidrel + progesterone BFN, IUI 2 and 3 w/ Letrozole + Ovidrel + progesterone,
IUI 4 Follistim + Ovidrel + progesterone BFP 1/9/20 EDD 9/18/20
AMA, ITP in pregnancy, vWD type II - low Factor VIII, unexplained RPL and secondary infertility
Dating: 10/23/2013
Married: 6/13/2014
TTC since June 2016
BFP #1: 3/2/17 - MC 5/22/17
Dating: 10/23/2013
Married: 6/13/2014
TTC since June 2016
BFP #1: 3/2/17 - MC 5/22/17
DH got literally no time off last time. They called him the day our son was born and asked him to come in, he said no of course but had to go back 2 days later. Since he's opening his own restaurant this summer he'll get no real time off again. Luckily my mom has promised to come help for a big chunk of time.
TTC 9/2016 BFP 12/9/16 EDD 8/21/17 NMC 1/8/16 at 7w6d
TTC 2/2017 BFP 3/6/17 EDD 11/17/17 DS born 11/25/17 via ECS
TTC 12/2018 BFP 6/2/19 EDD 2/12/20 NMC / BO at 7 weeks, low progesterone
TTC 7/2019 BFP 8/21/19 EDD 4/22/20 CP at 5 weeks
TTC 8/19 IUI #1 w/ Clomid + Ovidrel + progesterone BFN, IUI 2 and 3 w/ Letrozole + Ovidrel + progesterone,
IUI 4 Follistim + Ovidrel + progesterone BFP 1/9/20 EDD 9/18/20
AMA, ITP in pregnancy, vWD type II - low Factor VIII, unexplained RPL and secondary infertility
Normally DH would get at least 10 days of paternity leave but he will be in class/training and can't miss it so he doesn't get to use it. I have heard rumors of the Army upping it to 14 days for non-primary care givers. Moms get 12 weeks after delivery.
@BayCamp I'm thinking of a work from home call center type thing too. DH doesn't get time off for this LO but our parents are each coming down for a week, at separate times, to help.
TTC since August 2018
I get 12 weeks full pay.
TTC 9/2016 BFP 12/9/16 EDD 8/21/17 NMC 1/8/16 at 7w6d
TTC 2/2017 BFP 3/6/17 EDD 11/17/17 DS born 11/25/17 via ECS
TTC 12/2018 BFP 6/2/19 EDD 2/12/20 NMC / BO at 7 weeks, low progesterone
TTC 7/2019 BFP 8/21/19 EDD 4/22/20 CP at 5 weeks
TTC 8/19 IUI #1 w/ Clomid + Ovidrel + progesterone BFN, IUI 2 and 3 w/ Letrozole + Ovidrel + progesterone,
IUI 4 Follistim + Ovidrel + progesterone BFP 1/9/20 EDD 9/18/20
AMA, ITP in pregnancy, vWD type II - low Factor VIII, unexplained RPL and secondary infertility
@dragonfly87 I would gladly pay more taxes to get free healthcare for all and also better maternity leave/parental leave.
Met 2008 | Dated 2010 | Married 2012
TTC#1 since June 2015
June 2016- 50mg generic clomid CDs 5-9 w/TI | 2 follies (14 & 12), thin (2.45) lining | BFN
July 2016- 1mg estradiol CDs 1-7, 50mg generic clomid CDs 5-9 w/TI | 2 follies (14 & 10), thin (~4) lining | BFN
August 2016- 1mg estradiol CDs 1-7, 50mg generic clomid CDs 5-9 w/TI | BFN | Referred to specialist, visited once, was told we have less than a 3% chance even on medication, recommended to IUI for up to a 50% chance, decided not to pursue at this time | Stopped "trying"
October 2016- We became licensed foster parents
November 9, 2016- Arrival of DD#1, 4yo
March 1, 2017- 1 day late, feel like crap (low fever & exhausted) | Mom suggested test before taking meds, I laughed but did it anyway | BFP! *shock*
ETA- also, we don't have HR...
Met 2008 | Dated 2010 | Married 2012
TTC#1 since June 2015
June 2016- 50mg generic clomid CDs 5-9 w/TI | 2 follies (14 & 12), thin (2.45) lining | BFN
July 2016- 1mg estradiol CDs 1-7, 50mg generic clomid CDs 5-9 w/TI | 2 follies (14 & 10), thin (~4) lining | BFN
August 2016- 1mg estradiol CDs 1-7, 50mg generic clomid CDs 5-9 w/TI | BFN | Referred to specialist, visited once, was told we have less than a 3% chance even on medication, recommended to IUI for up to a 50% chance, decided not to pursue at this time | Stopped "trying"
October 2016- We became licensed foster parents
November 9, 2016- Arrival of DD#1, 4yo
March 1, 2017- 1 day late, feel like crap (low fever & exhausted) | Mom suggested test before taking meds, I laughed but did it anyway | BFP! *shock*