I had the arm implant after my first, but after 8 months, the irregular spotting got annoying and I went back on the pill until we started trying again.
I'm thinking copper IUD this time, maybe. What's everyone else thinking?
I haven't given it much thought at this point. I was on the Mirena IUD for a long time. While I loved it, I realized it messed up my hormones quite a bit and coming off it was miserable.
So I am undecided, but now that I am pretty in tune with tracking my cycles and understand how to identify fertile/not fertile days...I may try just TTA with Fertility Friend. I know there is a risk with that, but for a little while, that may be the way to go for us. For the first few months after baby is born, we will likely just use condoms...if we manage to have much sex though.
I want four children relatively close in age. This is my first pregnancy so my plan is basically to not go on birth control until after the fourth (God willing). I'm toying with the idea of the arm implant but we'll see. I really hated being on birth control pills and stopped those a month or two before we got married so we may end up just relying on condoms if I don't like the implant. The idea of an IUD freaks me out so likely will not go that route.
TL;DR I don't know. Luckily don't have to worry for a while!
I have always been a little leery of anything I can't stop quickly, so I will most likely just go back on a pill (one that is safe for breastfeeding) I have had too many negative effects from different types of pills so I like that I can just quit one and switch if necessary.
lol it's the last thing on my mind. If we find time for sex anytime soon after baby number 2 then that will be awesome! Just kidding. I'm probably done having kids so maybe a permanent solution might work. Will cross that bridge when I can think about it.
Like @DuchessOfCambridge this is our first of a few (3 for us, hopefully) and we aren't planning to use any contraception as we'd like them close in age, but if it doesn't happen then that's okay too.
I was on Skyla which is a hormonal IUD like Mirena but smaller and has a smaller dosage. I loved it. I was on pills for 2 months while TTC (technically TTA then so I wasn't 9 months pregnant moving across the world) and the side effects were horrendous. I had forgotten how bad they were in high school. I got the Depo shots for a year or so and then my IUD.
We will do NFP and / or condoms. I don't plan on going back on BCP until I'm done having kids. I will probably do Seasonique then because I bleed heavily and that doesn't work so well when I'm teaching.
It's funny how it's the little things in life that mean the most...not where you live, or what you drive, or the price tag on your clothes... There's no dollar sign on a piece of mind, this I've come to know! *ZBB*
Just be careful if you're planning to nurse. My Dr said I could do regular birth control after about 4 months (luckily I forgot so it was 7 months) bc my milk would be well enough established that the pill shouldn't affect it...well wrong. Dried my milk up in 24 hours. I plan to stay on the mini pill until I'm done nursing and then once we figure out if we want a 3rd go from there
I was on the pill for 15 years before we decided to start a family, and while it worked well for me, neither DH nor I want to go back to it. But, I don't know what we'll do in the meantime between kids. Once we're done having kids he'll get a vasectomy, I would think.
TW
Me: 33 DH: 32 Started Dating: 2003 Married: 2013 Started TTC August 2016 BFP: 2/1/17 MC: 2/8/17 BFP: 3/8/17 MMC: 5/1/17 BFP: 7/23/17 EDD: 4/5/18 BFP: 2/27/20
Between DH and I, we will have 6 kids after LO is born. Honestly, if LO is a girl, we will probably be done. If LO is a boy, we'll probably try one more time for a girl and we'll want it to happen soon after this pregnancy. So, if it's a girl, I'll probably get the Mirena. Honestly, I never had any issues when I had it before and I loved not having a period. If it's a boy, we'll probably wait on any kind of birth control.
I'm thinking "not paying for fertility treatments" along with temping/charting cycles will be good enough for us. But a 3rd baby wouldn't be world-ending.
~Mom to an amazing Jan 2011 boy~ ~EDD Nov 18, 2017 with my IUI success story~
Ladies, i would strongly caution against the arm implant if you've had adverse reactions to bc before. I am not a medical expert, only going off my own experience with it, but for me it was bc times 100. Major weight gain and depression, and it took them months to agree to take it out. I still have the scar from where they had to dig it out of my arm.
Pregnancy brain made me say arm implant and that's not what I want at all lol. I want the shots! Anyone have experience with those? I don't like shots but one shot every so often and then I don't have to have anything in my body or remember to take a pill every day? Sounds awesome to me!
I have been off hormonal BC since we were married in 2010 - and I don't plan to return. We've just used condoms meanwhile and they've worked for us. @DuchessOfCambridge I was on the Depo shot for 7 years and it was the only thing I used, it does require a visit/shot every 3mo but it's just in your "hip" (aka butt) and is really painless. I loved it at the time - no period and nothing to remember to do daily. However, the main concern is that it can mess with your calcium absorption and long-term use is not really recommended (more than ~5yr), at least that was the case in 2010. At the age of 24 they sent me to get a bone density scan, which showed mild depletion around my spine. I cannot say for sure it was due to the depo, of course. I then just became generally angry about how I was potentially messing up my body long-term by taking BC (and of course went through all of the feelings about why there isn't BC for men, etc.), so it was best for me to stop. When I stopped, I was surprised by my natural hormone fluctuation especially around ovulation (increased sex drive, etc.) and realized that for most of my adult life I had been kind of numbed by a regulated hormone stream. That's why I think it's best for me to not return. That said, I appreciate that there are a lot of options for us related to family planning. I think we'd consider vasectomy if I was still fertile when we decided that we could/should not have more children.
@car1a thanks for the info. That's kind of how I was feeling about BC pills. I got on them specifically to regulate my periods and they were still terribly heavy and hurt like no other so I got off them a month or two before we got married because I was sick of it and kept worrying about what they were doing to me. Didn't see the point if they weren't regulating my period anyway, and we did a great job of not having a baby until we were ready. I guess that's just a bridge I'll have to cross when we get to it.
@car1a That's the main reason I won't be going back to the pill... since I've been off, and looking back at the past 10 years I've realized how much my sex drive has decreased, and that sucks.
TW
Me: 33 DH: 32 Started Dating: 2003 Married: 2013 Started TTC August 2016 BFP: 2/1/17 MC: 2/8/17 BFP: 3/8/17 MMC: 5/1/17 BFP: 7/23/17 EDD: 4/5/18 BFP: 2/27/20
@DuchessOfCambridge yes I should add that I completely sympathize with those taking BC for regulation or to combat severe bleeding/pain. I do not have bad bleeding, so personally my depo use was ultimately impulsive- very good short-term but potentially negative long-term.
Add me to the list of anti-hormonal birth control. I loathe them.
Since it it looks like we won't be getting around to trying to find a doctor and beg him to snip DH before the baby is born, I guess we'll be using condoms until we're ready for the surgery post-baby.
I went on the shot after having my son in 2103 and only used it for two doses (so about 6 months), but then I struggled to get my body back to regular after going off (and I had always been very regular). Then, not surprising since I wasn't at all regular, struggled to conceive. The doctors said it was likely related to the shot because it has such a long half-life (https://www.ask-curtis.com/how-long-does-it-take-for-the-depo-provera-shot-to-wear-off/). Thankfully we were finally able to get things back to normal, but @DuchessOfCambridge please keep that in mind if you want to have another sooner rather than later.
Because of that, and because I don't want to be done after this one, we likely will rely on condoms after this one, as we don't want to go another 4+ years between this one and the next.
Thanks @mommawolff11! I think I mentioned above that I'm just avoiding all hormonal BC until we're done with all the kids we want But that's good information to have anyway.
I was going to do a tubal afterwards but my DH brought up that it was dangerous, which I didn't think it was. Dr. Googled it and it scared the H out of me (the tubal ligation syndrome). So I am going to talk to the doc but he said he would get vasectomy.
I used Mirena before we started our family and then got Paraguard after our first and absolutely loved both of them. I am a huge proponent of the IUD. Full disclosure, the first 3ish months after getting it are AWFUL as your body adjusts but for me, it was so amazing afterwards, especially paraguard and not having the hormones anymore. I'm crazy enough, I don't need help!
That being said, we're done after this baby and I won't be doing anything else but my husband will be getting snipped. Hopefully while we're still in the hospital with this little nugget!
Definitely doesn't work for everyone, but nursing loosely along the principles of ecological breastfeeding has helped me space pregnancies. With both of my previous kids, I had 18 months without my cycle postpartum before my fertility returned, which is enough time that we are out of crisis mode and more or less ready. It means you really have to commit to keeping your baby handy (not just pumping) and not sleeping through the night, but no scary hormones, and I enjoy nursing.
I was going to do a tubal afterwards but my DH brought up that it was dangerous, which I didn't think it was. Dr. Googled it and it scared the H out of me (the tubal ligation syndrome). So I am going to talk to the doc but he said he would get vasectomy.
We are old and done
My ex got a vasectomy since it's really pretty easy and low risk for them. Tubal ligation is serious business for women!
If it ever came to it, my FI would get a vasectomy before I'd do a tubal, and due to family history of stroke while on hormonal bc, hormonal solutions are 100% out for me.
~Mom to an amazing Jan 2011 boy~ ~EDD Nov 18, 2017 with my IUI success story~
i am also always legitimately slack-jawed SHOCKED when people end up pregnant at their 6 week check up. It was MONTHS before I could even consider sex again and probably a year before I could no longer feel all the places I tore.
One of the appointments I had after having my son, the OB asked what method of birth control we were using. totally straight-faced, I was like "abstinence"
~Mom to an amazing Jan 2011 boy~ ~EDD Nov 18, 2017 with my IUI success story~
@pawcall - When I was pregnant with my first, a random woman I met in line for the bathroom decided to share that she had sex before her 6 week check up and got pregnant. They didn't realize it for a few months because of BFing, but she eventually took a test and her pregnancy dated back to that one super early PP sexy time. Her kids were basically like 10 months apart.
Somebody in my husband's family was already pregnant by her 6 week checkup but the doc didn't tell her until the next time she came in, because he said he didn't have the heart to. She practically fell on the floor. I don't think my stitches had healed up by that time. Jeez!
I'm thinking "not paying for fertility treatments" along with temping/charting cycles will be good enough for us. But a 3rd baby wouldn't be world-ending.
@pawcall You read my mind... We plan to wait the recommended year before TTC again but I doubt we'll do anything during that first besides me monitoring my cycle. I'm the opposite of a fertile myrtle so it's not like I'd get pregnant without meds anyway!
We also plan to keep the baby in our room in a pack and play for at least the first 2-3 months so that will *ahem* put a damper on any sexytimes.
Somebody in my husband's family was already pregnant by her 6 week checkup but the doc didn't tell her until the next time she came in, because he said he didn't have the heart to. She practically fell on the floor. I don't think my stitches had healed up by that time. Jeez!
How irresponsible of that doctor!! What if she was secretly doing Meth or something!?!?
(eta obviously she was not, realizing now that sounds like it was directed toward your sister. But seriously, you never know when someone's going to Vegas for a bachelorette party, or taking loads ibuprofen for headache after or so many other risks)
@DuchessofCambridge I had the shots for a year with no major side effects but I tolerate all progesterone bc well (it's the estrogen in the combo pill that kills me). If you use the shots for more than 2 years you increase your risk for osteoporosis or something like that.
Just a cute on topic story for y'all. I am close to my in-laws. Last week my FIL asked me what we were planning for birth control after baby.....and had we ever done NFP/billings method? Cause it totally worked for him and MIL and he knows that the Pill caused me to have major issues last year that led to some nasty surgery.
He was totally ready to educate me on the how's and whys of the method. Totally sincere and sweet. And i kinda just sat there and loved him a whole lot more for his concern and care of us.
DH freaked out about the conversation cause he doesnt like to think about his parents in that way. But 7 kids..... come on! They way experienced.
Crap. We've been on pull-and-pray for the 4 years since I got off the pill, except for condoms the 6m after DS was born, because we would have been ok getting pregnant. And let's face it there wasn't a lot of sexy time in those 6 months.
I guess I'll actually have to think about this now. DH is a huge baby about condoms so that's not a feasible long term plan until we decide if there will be a #3
As a few others stated this is baby #1 for us and we want at least 2 more. It took us over a year to conceive so honestly it will probably just be condoms (even though he doesn't like them) at least for a little while until I have had time to for my body to be ready again and then maybe just Pull and Pray until we are 100% for the next one. I hated taking the pill but it did help with my periods so it was beneficial for me. DH has already agreed when the day comes to get the snip.
Re: Birth control after baby?
So I am undecided, but now that I am pretty in tune with tracking my cycles and understand how to identify fertile/not fertile days...I may try just TTA with Fertility Friend. I know there is a risk with that, but for a little while, that may be the way to go for us. For the first few months after baby is born, we will likely just use condoms...if we manage to have much sex though.
TL;DR I don't know. Luckily don't have to worry for a while!
I was on Skyla which is a hormonal IUD like Mirena but smaller and has a smaller dosage. I loved it. I was on pills for 2 months while TTC (technically TTA then so I wasn't 9 months pregnant moving across the world) and the side effects were horrendous. I had forgotten how bad they were in high school. I got the Depo shots for a year or so and then my IUD.
TTC since August 2018
TTC 9/2016 BFP 12/9/16 EDD 8/21/17 NMC 1/8/16 at 7w6d
TTC 2/2017 BFP 3/6/17 EDD 11/17/17 DS born 11/25/17 via ECS
TTC 12/2018 BFP 6/2/19 EDD 2/12/20 NMC / BO at 7 weeks, low progesterone
TTC 7/2019 BFP 8/21/19 EDD 4/22/20 CP at 5 weeks
TTC 8/19 IUI #1 w/ Clomid + Ovidrel + progesterone BFN, IUI 2 and 3 w/ Letrozole + Ovidrel + progesterone,
IUI 4 Follistim + Ovidrel + progesterone BFP 1/9/20 EDD 9/18/20
AMA, ITP in pregnancy, vWD type II - low Factor VIII, unexplained RPL and secondary infertility
Started Dating: 2003 Married: 2013
Started TTC August 2016
BFP: 2/1/17 MC: 2/8/17
BFP: 3/8/17 MMC: 5/1/17
BFP: 7/23/17 EDD: 4/5/18
BFP: 2/27/20
~EDD Nov 18, 2017 with my IUI success story~
[spoiler]
Started Dating: 2003 Married: 2013
Started TTC August 2016
BFP: 2/1/17 MC: 2/8/17
BFP: 3/8/17 MMC: 5/1/17
BFP: 7/23/17 EDD: 4/5/18
BFP: 2/27/20
Since it it looks like we won't be getting around to trying to find a doctor and beg him to snip DH before the baby is born, I guess we'll be using condoms until we're ready for the surgery post-baby.
Because of that, and because I don't want to be done after this one, we likely will rely on condoms after this one, as we don't want to go another 4+ years between this one and the next.
We are old and done
Me: 42, DH: 46, Married: 11/12
Losses: MMC#1 11/12 BO, MC#2 11/13 at 8w BO?, MMC#3 8/14 chromo healthy M @12 weeks, stopped growing at 10.
Negligible AMH, FSH finally went high. Pursued DE.
DD born at 38w2d on 5-27-16. Finally!!
Pregnant again with OE. EDD 11/9/17 Girl!
I used Mirena before we started our family and then got Paraguard after our first and absolutely loved both of them. I am a huge proponent of the IUD. Full disclosure, the first 3ish months after getting it are AWFUL as your body adjusts but for me, it was so amazing afterwards, especially paraguard and not having the hormones anymore. I'm crazy enough, I don't need help!
That being said, we're done after this baby and I won't be doing anything else but my husband will be getting snipped. Hopefully while we're still in the hospital with this little nugget!
If it ever came to it, my FI would get a vasectomy before I'd do a tubal, and due to family history of stroke while on hormonal bc, hormonal solutions are 100% out for me.
~EDD Nov 18, 2017 with my IUI success story~
[spoiler]
One of the appointments I had after having my son, the OB asked what method of birth control we were using. totally straight-faced, I was like "abstinence"
~EDD Nov 18, 2017 with my IUI success story~
[spoiler]
Nope. No thanks.
Me: 42, DH: 46, Married: 11/12
Losses: MMC#1 11/12 BO, MC#2 11/13 at 8w BO?, MMC#3 8/14 chromo healthy M @12 weeks, stopped growing at 10.
Negligible AMH, FSH finally went high. Pursued DE.
DD born at 38w2d on 5-27-16. Finally!!
Pregnant again with OE. EDD 11/9/17 Girl!
We also plan to keep the baby in our room in a pack and play for at least the first 2-3 months so that will *ahem* put a damper on any sexytimes.
(eta obviously she was not, realizing now that sounds like it was directed toward your sister. But seriously, you never know when someone's going to Vegas for a bachelorette party, or taking loads ibuprofen for headache after or so many other risks)
@DuchessofCambridge I had the shots for a year with no major side effects but I tolerate all progesterone bc well (it's the estrogen in the combo pill that kills me). If you use the shots for more than 2 years you increase your risk for osteoporosis or something like that.
TTC since August 2018
He was totally ready to educate me on the how's and whys of the method. Totally sincere and sweet. And i kinda just sat there and loved him a whole lot more for his concern and care of us.
DH freaked out about the conversation cause he doesnt like to think about his parents in that way. But 7 kids..... come on! They way experienced.
I guess I'll actually have to think about this now. DH is a huge baby about condoms so that's not a feasible long term plan until we decide if there will be a #3