First pregnancy/loss

silvergreen · April 2017

This is my first pregnancy, and just discovered through my second scan yesterday that my baby no longer has a heartbeat. It did not grow past my first scan, which was measuring a little over 6 weeks (where it had a heartbeat of 111).

My OBGYN office is closed on Friday afternoons, so I find myself trying to cope with this for the weekend. I will be seeing them Monday afternoon for what was meant to be a routine follow up.

I know which options are likely to be presented to me. I think I will opt for the pill to induce MC as the D&C will not be affordable - around $3k after insurance covers their part.

There is immense fear as I have never experienced this before, and reading many traumatic stories leaves me petrified.

I moved to the states from the U.K. when I married my DH, and I have no immediate family to physically be here to help me through it all... I just feel really alone.

Mack2342 · April 2017

I'm so sorry for your loss. I don't have family near by either. I talked with my mom on phone but I really found comfort in this board and TTCAL board. No matter what option you choose please be kind to yourself. This is tough. I have feelings of sadness, anger, guilt at times and other times I feel fine. All of which are normal. I've had two d & Cs but no experience with the medication I hope you have a speedy recovery. Hugs to you

silvergreen · April 2017

Thank you @Mack2342 - I really wish I could have the D&C, but the cost is crippling. I am so scared of the pain of passing, that it's all I think about, I can barely sleep.

Mack2342 · April 2017

I'm sure. I started spotting and thought that it was going to happen natural for me too and I was scared. I've had a couple friends tell me it's like bad period cramps with bleeding like a period until pass all the tissue. But that's really all I have on that. I think my insurance covered my procedures. I had one in August and haven't gotten anything and the 2nd one was just a week ago. So I guess I'm lucky in that regard. I truly hope all goes smoothly and quickly for you. No matter how you look at it this process sucks and it sucks to be here. Hugs to you

silvergreen · April 2017

Thanks again @Mack2342

I have had a sudden change of heart, and have decided to opt for a D&C regardless of cost. Sometimes I don't think you can put a price on your emotional/mental wellbeing. I know this is not the right choice for everyone, but it is for me. I will be consumed by my anxiety otherwise. I am just ready to move past this and heal, in all aspects.

On top of that, the stories I have read where people attempt to pass on their own and needed a D&C anyway has only further solidified my decision. I called my OB, and my sister-in-law who is a doctor, and both were supportive of my decision. I will be heading in for the procedure tomorrow morning.

amberruka · April 2017

Best of luck to you @Thea17. I'm sorry for your loss. I do agree that you can't put a price on emotional well being.....might want to check in whether the facility has a payment plan? Feel free to join us in TTCAL if you like (we have a benched thread for those not actively TTC as well).

Mack2342 · April 2017

Good luck tomorrow. I agree that you can't put a price on emotional health.

splashmountain · April 2017

@Thea17 I'm sorry for your loss. Good luck with the procedure

GhanimaAtreides · April 2017

I'm sorry for your loss. I hope the physical recovery is going well.

silvergreen · April 2017

Thank you. I am doing well. The D&C was the right choice for me. I wasn't awake, have had minimal bleeding so far (light bleeding following the procedure, but hardly anything the following two days), and a little achiness that subsides when I lay down. Have had no need for the prescribed painkillers yet. Hopefully my experience will assist others in making that decision, if necessary.

First pregnancy/loss

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