My husband has his great moments. I will say he's more likely to do stuff for me, as in get me stuff, take the trash out by himself. He's also been cooking more lately, which I *love*.
That being said, he does have moments where it seems he thinks I'm "milking it." For instance, if I don't feel like going out on the weekends because I'm exhausted, then he sulks and starts complaining about how we never do anything and it'll only get worse when the baby comes. Which on the one hand, I understand, but at the same time, I am working beyond the hours of a normal full time job AND i'm pregnant which leaves me chronically exhausted, plus I never get a night of uninterrupted sleep thanks to the tiny human who loves to play with my bladder. I just want a day to sleep and recover from a rough week! And sometimes I only have one day off a week, which is when things get contentious.
TTC history in spoiler
Me: 31 Him: 37 Married: Oct 2015 Baby G born June 2017 TTC#2: July 2018 BFP #2: 2/6/19 MC 3/14/19 BFP#3 from IUI #2: 6/30/20 EDD 3/9/21
I was sitting reading through these getting mad at my husband because he's not nearly as helpful or as attentive lol. The guy is constantly busy between work and our renovation project so I cut him a break but reading these still made me mad haha.
Anyway, my daughter just did a large stinky up the back poop and I smelled it first. Usually we have a whoever smells it changes it rule. But he just got up changed her diaper and got rid of her clothes without any prompting.
And while i definitely do the bulk of the work around here with cleaning and cooking and babycare, he's always thanking me when I wash his clothes and tell him the food is ready. As long as I feel appreciated, I'm happy.
He he has his chores too. The bathrooms are his responsibility to clean and he has to take out recycling and garbage. He slacks off sometimes but I never nag him because I slack off too and he never complains.
He also doesn't give a crap if I haven't showered in 2 days, my hair is a frizzy mess, I haven't shaved anywhere in a week, and I'm wearing baggy clothes with holes in them, the guy always wants in my pants haha. Which makes me feel loved and attractive even if I end up shooting him down lol.
Didn't realize I had this many nice things to say about him
BFP May 2013 - MMC at 8 weeks BFP September 2013 - MMC at 12 weeks BFP February 2014 - early loss/CP at 4.5 weeks BFP May 2014 - MMC/ complete molar pregnancy at 11 weeks BFP December 2015 - DD born 8/18/2015 BFP November 2016 - pending...
My husband seems to be a lot more into this pregnancy, than last time! LOL What I mean is he is a dad now to our son, it's like he 'gets it' more?! Anyway, it's nice. He did a lot of unprompted cleaning all morning!!! Hello, love. Keep it coming. I'll be 22 weeks Monday....and can't believe how fast it has gone by!!! How?!
eta: husband has been a total lifesaver with the daily poopy diapers. He has really stepped up in so many ways.
DH has stepped up a lot more since the BFP. He still needs some prompting but does stuff without question. (If I knew having a baby would get him to do housework maybe we would have tried sooner! LOL jks jks) He has a weak stomach but rubbed my back while I hurled with the stomach flu a few weeks ago. I'm surprised he didn't puke himself, especially considering (TMI) that I didn't exactly "make it" at first and threw up on the entire toilet! It was kind of hard not to see it haha! I know being around that kind of ickiness is hard for him so I appreciated it that much more He's always concerned about me. I make a funny face or complain about an odd pain or just look off and he's all "are you okay?" It's sweet but SO annoying at the same time! He will also call if I'm not home when I should be. Not in a controlling way at all as he never did this before baby. He gets worried. I tell him not to. Rarely am I ever home from work on time because I'm always running around doing God knows what. He's usually not home before me so he generally never noticed.
He pretty much won't let me do anything, carry anything, you name it. I made the decision to completely redesign the nursery. Last night I'm sitting on the top of a ladder taping the ceiling (to get ready to paint) and you should have seen the look on his face when he walked in! I exclaimed that I did this for the entire house when we were building and not once did I have an issue with the ladder! I told him if he was that concerned then by all means he could sit there and "supervise." Then he tried to help and that did NOT work out. He doesn't tape, or cut, or roll or paint in any sense and I told him to just stop haha! So then he sat there eating a bag of chips watching me not fall off the ladder lol!
I didn't think things would be too different. I expected everything to be like it was, during pregnancy and with baby. TBH I worried about having to nag him while having a newborn. Just how he's stepped up the past few months have made me wonder why I ever doubted him. He so excited. We're excited. We know our relationship is going to change and we worry but we've weathered a lot of storms together and know that in the end we'll be okay. He's my rock.
He also doesn't give a crap if I haven't showered in 2 days, my hair is a frizzy mess, I haven't shaved anywhere in a week, and I'm wearing baggy clothes with holes in them, the guy always wants in my pants haha. Which makes me feel loved and attractive even if I end up shooting him down lol.
My husband is like this too. I feel bad for the poor guy because everyone keeps talking about this second tri libido but I just don't have it. Dude still wants me every day. Always has.
DH has always been super helpful around the house. I cook and he cleans. (He definitely has the short end of the chore stick) And he's been really sweet and attentive lately. Even more so with the recent SPD diagnosis. He goes out of his way to try to make me more comfortable.
My one complaint is his refusal to start thinking about baby names. I'm 22 weeks and he still thinks that's way too early to begin discussing. I know it's not something I should complain about since he's so thoughtful and hasn't missed a single OB appointment, but it gets to me sometimes...especially when friends and family ask if we've thought of any names yet.
@manillabar I totally get this from my husband too. I think he just doesn't get how exhausting it is. Plus, you're a doctor, right? Your job alone would leave me passed out on the couch on my one day off. Add in pregnancy and forget it!
Dh was out of town this week for work. All week. It was a horrible week for me. I slept like crap because I never sleep well when he's out of town and I had to solo parent our 3yo. Work has been awful and today I'm in a massive amount of pain. I overdid it on the elliptical yesterday and my RLP is in overdrive today. I want to curl up in a ball and die. My DH drove 7 hours to come home today and on his way to the office, he swung by the house and got my support belt that I'd left at home just to bring it up to my office and drop it off before heading to his office to discuss what he learned this past week in training. He added probably an hour to his drive just to get my belt to me because I'm in pain. I may have cried. If I weren't in so much pain, he'd totally get his favorite brownies tonight. The thoughts of standing at the stove and making them though make me want to puke. He's such an amazing man.
He also doesn't give a crap if I haven't showered in 2 days, my hair is a frizzy mess, I haven't shaved anywhere in a week, and I'm wearing baggy clothes with holes in them, the guy always wants in my pants haha. Which makes me feel loved and attractive even if I end up shooting him down lol.
My husband is like this too. I feel bad for the poor guy because everyone keeps talking about this second tri libido but I just don't have it. Dude still wants me every day. Always has.
Yes to both of these comments!!! Lol Same thing is happening here.
You guys have some pretty sweek SOs... today we had a goodbye lunch for a friend/coworker. I had a noon meeting and couldn't go to the pub. I asked DH and Co to pretty please bring me a pretzel with extra mustard. They walk in the door and as he sees the delight on my face I get an "oh $hit" all 5 of them forgot.
@ljd2010 yeah I am, and unfortunately not on an easy rotation. But regardless, pregnancy in and of itself is enough of a reason to take it easy! It's like he doesn't think it's taxing until I'm 9 months pregnant and rolling myself down the hallway.
TTC history in spoiler
Me: 31 Him: 37 Married: Oct 2015 Baby G born June 2017 TTC#2: July 2018 BFP #2: 2/6/19 MC 3/14/19 BFP#3 from IUI #2: 6/30/20 EDD 3/9/21
I went out for a pedicure and lunch yesterday and came home to find that DH had moved all the furniture, stuff and exercise equipment around in the basement while I was gone. We had planned to do it together when I got home but he said I went out to relax and he didn't want me coming home and having to do a bunch of work so he did it himself.
I tagged along with DH to Las Vegas for a work trip so we could have a mini babymoon.
Apparently, we did not close the front door securely so it flew open while we were gone. The neighbors across the street closed the door for us late that evening.
DH and I both got the flu and were about to fall over when we came back home. When we got back, the house was a nightmare. A bird and I think a dog had wandered in during the day and must have engaged in a duel/poop contest. There were blood, feathers, bird poop, and piles of dog poop everywhere. Things were knocked over. The smell was awful.
They even made it to our bedroom bedroom upstairs and there was poop all over the new carpet. I started vacuuming the feathers downstairs but the poop smell got to me and I started gagging. DH immediately quarantined me in the spare bedroom that had remained unscathed. Meanwhile, he, while trying not to pass out from the flu and his fever, proceeded to clean up the poop and air out the house. He also heated up some canned chicken noodle soup for me when I got hungry.
This is the same man who four years ago, went to run and hide in our bedroom when my sister's cat got mad at us and pooped on our kitchen floor because his gag reflex was too sensitive to help me clean it up.
@Twinkiedoll Oh my goodness. I so don't mean to giggle at your misfortune, but from someone that has had a fair amount of poop tragedies I can't even help it! Soooo sorry this happened to you and thank goodness for your DH cleaning it up! Hoping the smell comes out easily and hope you two feel better soon!
To follow your story and hopefully make you feel better, not once but twice our chiweenie has pooped while our beloved Roomba was running and that thing tracked $#!+ all over the damn house. It wasn't funny at the time, but now that I look back on it, I laugh. It was ground into our accent rugs, smeared on the tile, and in EVERY. LAST. NOOK. AND CRANNY. that Roomba possesses.
@Twinkiedoll Holy moly! That sounds horrific. the dog wasn't in the house anymore, I assume. It must have left before your neighbors closed the door. That is an insane story. I'm so sorry it happened to you.
If that had happened to me, I would have taken one look at the mess and said "nope" we don't live here anymore, where are the matches? I'm totally joking of course, but omg!
@supermom83 yeah it looks like the critters left by the time the neighbors closed the door. I'm actually a little afraid that we haven't found the bird carcass yet (I'm pretty sure the bird lost the duel, judging by lost feather count).
@Twinkiedoll oh no. That sounds like the quickest way to erase any relaxation from the mini babymoon that was left after the flu set in. You deserve a do-over! (Even if it's just a relaxing weekend at home with your amazing husband.)
Oh @Twinkiedoll that's AWFUL!! Your man is a saint. DH and I would have gotten into a fight about me wanting to leave and get a hotel that night, I'm certain. I hope the trip was good, though I imagine that part is hard to remember by now. Ugh. The flu is the absolute worst. Feel better soon, lady. I'm so sorry!!!
Omg @Twinkiedoll that actually sounds like a nightmare I had... I can't believe this happened to you! I'm scared just reading it. I'm in awe of your husband, he should get this board's official "husband of the month" award.
Thanks, ladies. Yes, DH is a saint. Poor thing is taking a nap next to me right now after trying to go to work today. He made it half a day before they sent him back home.
Yea @Twinkiedoll your husband deserves an award for that. Definitely not a good way to come home at all from a trip. So sorry and hope yall feel better soon.
My husband did such a nice thing for me last night. I made dinner in kind of a rush because he got home late from a meeting and we had to get DS to bed. So I made DS's meal and salmon/salads for my dad (who is visiting) and husband. In my rush, I totally forgot to make something for myself! (I would normally eat the same thing but I am having a salmon aversion). After I put DS down, my husband went out and picked up a specialty hamburger and big milkshake for me! He doesn't eat carbs right now so he couldn't even enjoy any of it with me-- just wanted me to have a tasty dinner. I loved it!
@mamadcb, that is so sweet! There's nothing like the little things that show they care about you, right?
Married 25 May, 2013 William Alexander born 18 September, 2015 Harper Grace born 9 June, 2017 Colton Miles born 9 June, 2017 Bowen James due 19 June, 2019
We got a crap ton of freezing rain the other day and our driveway was a skating rink. DH walked me out to my car because he was worried about me slipping and falling. For once I thought it was sweet and not at all annoying haha!
Re: Husbands, partners, SOs
That being said, he does have moments where it seems he thinks I'm "milking it." For instance, if I don't feel like going out on the weekends because I'm exhausted, then he sulks and starts complaining about how we never do anything and it'll only get worse when the baby comes. Which on the one hand, I understand, but at the same time, I am working beyond the hours of a normal full time job AND i'm pregnant which leaves me chronically exhausted, plus I never get a night of uninterrupted sleep thanks to the tiny human who loves to play with my bladder. I just want a day to sleep and recover from a rough week! And sometimes I only have one day off a week, which is when things get contentious.
Married: Oct 2015
Baby G born June 2017
TTC#2: July 2018
BFP #2: 2/6/19 MC 3/14/19
BFP#3 from IUI #2: 6/30/20 EDD 3/9/21
Anyway, my daughter just did a large stinky up the back poop and I smelled it first. Usually we have a whoever smells it changes it rule. But he just got up changed her diaper and got rid of her clothes without any prompting.
And while i definitely do the bulk of the work around here with cleaning and cooking and babycare, he's always thanking me when I wash his clothes and tell him the food is ready. As long as I feel appreciated, I'm happy.
He he has his chores too. The bathrooms are his responsibility to clean and he has to take out recycling and garbage. He slacks off sometimes but I never nag him because I slack off too and he never complains.
He also doesn't give a crap if I haven't showered in 2 days, my hair is a frizzy mess, I haven't shaved anywhere in a week, and I'm wearing baggy clothes with holes in them, the guy always wants in my pants haha. Which makes me feel loved and attractive even if I end up shooting him down lol.
Didn't realize I had this many nice things to say about him
BFP September 2013 - MMC at 12 weeks
BFP February 2014 - early loss/CP at 4.5 weeks
BFP May 2014 - MMC/ complete molar pregnancy at 11 weeks
BFP December 2015 - DD born 8/18/2015
BFP November 2016 - pending...
eta: husband has been a total lifesaver with the daily poopy diapers. He has really stepped up in so many ways.
He pretty much won't let me do anything, carry anything, you name it. I made the decision to completely redesign the nursery. Last night I'm sitting on the top of a ladder taping the ceiling (to get ready to paint) and you should have seen the look on his face when he walked in! I exclaimed that I did this for the entire house when we were building and not once did I have an issue with the ladder! I told him if he was that concerned then by all means he could sit there and "supervise." Then he tried to help and that did NOT work out. He doesn't tape, or cut, or roll or paint in any sense and I told him to just stop haha! So then he sat there eating a bag of chips watching me not fall off the ladder lol!
I didn't think things would be too different. I expected everything to be like it was, during pregnancy and with baby. TBH I worried about having to nag him while having a newborn. Just how he's stepped up the past few months have made me wonder why I ever doubted him. He so excited. We're excited. We know our relationship is going to change and we worry but we've weathered a lot of storms together and know that in the end we'll be okay. He's my rock.
Edit: spelling
Met: 08/2001 ~ Dating: 07/2004 ~ Engaged: 11/2009 ~ Married: 06/2011
TTC: Since 09/16 ~ BFP 10/28/16 ~ EDD 7/5/17
Team Pink * Canadian Bumpie
Met: 08/2001 ~ Dating: 07/2004 ~ Engaged: 11/2009 ~ Married: 06/2011
TTC: Since 09/16 ~ BFP 10/28/16 ~ EDD 7/5/17
Team Pink * Canadian Bumpie
My one complaint is his refusal to start thinking about baby names. I'm 22 weeks and he still thinks that's way too early to begin discussing. I know it's not something I should complain about since he's so thoughtful and hasn't missed a single OB appointment, but it gets to me sometimes...especially when friends and family ask if we've thought of any names yet.
Dh was out of town this week for work. All week. It was a horrible week for me. I slept like crap because I never sleep well when he's out of town and I had to solo parent our 3yo. Work has been awful and today I'm in a massive amount of pain. I overdid it on the elliptical yesterday and my RLP is in overdrive today. I want to curl up in a ball and die. My DH drove 7 hours to come home today and on his way to the office, he swung by the house and got my support belt that I'd left at home just to bring it up to my office and drop it off before heading to his office to discuss what he learned this past week in training. He added probably an hour to his drive just to get my belt to me because I'm in pain. I may have cried. If I weren't in so much pain, he'd totally get his favorite brownies tonight. The thoughts of standing at the stove and making them though make me want to puke. He's such an amazing man.
Married: Oct 2015
Baby G born June 2017
TTC#2: July 2018
BFP #2: 2/6/19 MC 3/14/19
BFP#3 from IUI #2: 6/30/20 EDD 3/9/21
Married: 06-2024
TTC #1: Since November 2015
Restarted TTC "count" Oct. 2016
due to previous issues.
***TW***
BFP: 11/4/2016
BFP: 07/17/2024
Apparently, we did not close the front door securely so it flew open while we were gone. The neighbors across the street closed the door for us late that evening.
DH and I both got the flu and were about to fall over when we came back home. When we got back, the house was a nightmare. A bird and I think a dog had wandered in during the day and must have engaged in a duel/poop contest. There were blood, feathers, bird poop, and piles of dog poop everywhere. Things were knocked over. The smell was awful.
They even made it to our bedroom bedroom upstairs and there was poop all over the new carpet. I started vacuuming the feathers downstairs but the poop smell got to me and I started gagging. DH immediately quarantined me in the spare bedroom that had remained unscathed. Meanwhile, he, while trying not to pass out from the flu and his fever, proceeded to clean up the poop and air out the house. He also heated up some canned chicken noodle soup for me when I got hungry.
This is the same man who four years ago, went to run and hide in our bedroom when my sister's cat got mad at us and pooped on our kitchen floor because his gag reflex was too sensitive to help me clean it up.
He is my favorite person in the world.
To follow your story and hopefully make you feel better, not once but twice our chiweenie has pooped while our beloved Roomba was running and that thing tracked $#!+ all over the damn house. It wasn't funny at the time, but now that I look back on it, I laugh. It was ground into our accent rugs, smeared on the tile, and in EVERY. LAST. NOOK. AND CRANNY. that Roomba possesses.
Me: 26 Him: 27
Dating: 5/2011 Married: 6/2014
Mirena out/TTC: 02/2016
BFP #1: 12/01/2016
EDD: 07/24/2017
If that had happened to me, I would have taken one look at the mess and said "nope" we don't live here anymore, where are the matches? I'm totally joking of course, but omg!
William Alexander born 18 September, 2015
Harper Grace born 9 June, 2017
Colton Miles born 9 June, 2017
Bowen James due 19 June, 2019
Met: 08/2001 ~ Dating: 07/2004 ~ Engaged: 11/2009 ~ Married: 06/2011
TTC: Since 09/16 ~ BFP 10/28/16 ~ EDD 7/5/17
Team Pink * Canadian Bumpie