Weekly Bitch Fest (2/27)

Gators&BoSox · February 2017

wintersong · February 2017

I am just complaining because I had to spend 3 hours sleeping in my son's bed last night. My poor hips! But the whole time I was laying there I was just thinking about how soon he wouldn't have me all to himself anymore and I definitely knew I had to stay with him in his restless sleep.

OctoberLove13 · February 2017

People keep asking how I'm feeling, how much longer, etc... I respond with I'm ready when baby is. Several people have responded basically saying it doesn't get any better once the baby is here. Why is there such a negative connotation with having a newborn?!? And if it were that terrible then you would think that people wouldn't keep having babies... It's just kind of a mood killer for a FTM who's excited to meet her baby.

kiyamurph · February 2017

@OctoberLove13 Ugh! Sorry! I don't understand people sometimes. It's either, "it only gets worse from here", or let me tell you about my horrific delivery. Not sure why people feel like we want to hear either of those things. Either say congratulations on your pregnancy or zip it!

OctoberLove13 · February 2017

@kiyamurph Exactly! These comments usually come from people that have 2 or more kids. So, it makes me question why they continued to have babies if they thought it was so awful. This morning the comment came from a lady that's due in August with her 3rd...

mecoats · February 2017

I'm ready for maternity leave. I'm tired of getting up and coming into work where people don't know how to do their jobs. Someone just said, let me know if you have any questions on something she sent me AFTER 5 on Friday (I was gone). I've been here for 2 hours. Give me a minute to breathe before you get on my back about $5,000. Seriously it's not imperative! Ugh

OctoberLove13 · February 2017

@mecoats I'm SO ready for maternity leave too!! I need a reprieve from this place. Sorry your morning isn't going well.

wintersong · February 2017

@OctoberLove13 @kiyamurph

Or how about when people start with the "just wait until" comments? I mean, I've been tempted to say similar things to new moms (example: "my three day old already sleeps through the night!" "just wait until the 3 week growth spurt") but I'm acutely aware of how deflating those statements are.

kjd291 · February 2017

I don't understand people!! I despise the "just wait", "sleep now", "it only gets worse" comments.... no, no it really doesn't. I slept great with a newborn. My life is SO much better with her IN my life. Just shut up!

OctoberLove13 · February 2017

YES! The "just wait" kills me. I am fully aware that I am bringing a new tiny human into the world and he will have to adjust to his new surroundings. He's going to cry and have a strange schedule and I'm okay with that! I've had 24 years to adjust to a regular schedule and guess what(?!) I still hate abiding by it haha! I know the sleepless nights will be more than worth it.

wintersong · February 2017

I slept great with a newborn too. Newborns are hard because they are all consuming, but also easy because they are usually pretty basic. Nurse nurse nurse. Poop. Nurse nurse. Sleep. Look at you blearily for two minutes. Nurse nurse. Poop. Like I said, all consuming, but straightforward (usually, knock on wood).

direwolfmini · February 2017

@OctoberLove13 I had a super rough night with two crabby newborns and still slept better than I did 20 or more weeks pregnant... so those people can stfu

OctoberLove13 · February 2017

@direwolfmini sorry the babies were crabby but I'm happy to hear that you can sleep better not being pregnant!!

mtmama2 · February 2017

I completely agree with all of you about the negative comments! I'm at the point where I just want to cut people off mid sentence and say "if you don't have anything positive/nice/supportive to say to me then stfu"!

OctoberLove13 · February 2017

@SienaC Precisely!! Honestly, I remember people trying to scare me before my wedding by saying the first year of marriage was the hardest. That turned out to be total crap too. Our first year of marriage was like any other year of our relationship, nothing out of the ordinary at all! I assume the same will go for having a newborn. Apparently other people just have really shitty experiences.

dizzymom-2 · February 2017

@OctoberLove13 Yes!!! That has honestly been the worst part of my pregnancy. I get it and can even laugh with the best of them when someone makes a joke. What I can't stand... is that ever since we announced we were expecting all you hear is the bad stuff. Hardly anyone has anything good to say. It's all horror stories... I've heard so many nightmare birth scenarios I can't even count them. If my life is going to suck so bad after having a baby WTF do you have more than one kid? Unfortunately this is the society we live in. I've done my very best to focus on only the good. Whenever anyone asks me how I'm feeling my immediate response now is "I feel GREEEEAAAAT!" I swear sometimes people are disappointed with that answer...like they want me to be miserable. Or they're just not used to any fricken positivity. I also just say "we're ready and we're pretty excited" anytime someone makes a comment about how hard it's going to be once baby is here.

OctoberLove13 · February 2017

@DizzyMom Seriously!! If it's SOOO bad why did you (generally speaking) choose to have more than one?? It can't be all that bad. All I know is that I am excited to have my little one here and if I have to lose sleep, so be it.

ShaunaT25 · February 2017

I live in a small town, and there is a man who every time he sees me around literally quacks at me. I am so glad I am done work and can hide from people and their insensitive comments.... And animal noises.

hippiemama-2 · February 2017

@shaunat25 W.T.F. I would literally have to end his life. That is so unacceptable. I'm sorry you're having to deal with his debauchery.

ShaunaT25 · February 2017

@hippiemama right!?! I want to throw things at him. I can brush off the "are you sure there's only one in there" and "you're not going to make it to your due date".... Quacking is where I draw the line. Lol.

pandalily · February 2017

My husband took the leftovers to work that I wanted to eat for dinner. I didn't take them to work because I was scared it would be too spicy and I'd go into labor at work haha. I didn't think to tell him not to take it but he already ate it for dinner Saturday night and last night so I figured he'd either be tired of it or think hmm maybe I should let her eat some of it too. Also there were at least 3 different things he couldn't have taken instead. I was so looking forward to delicious spicy Indian food for dinner!!!! He's lucky I didn't cry.

mtmama2 · February 2017

@OctoberLove13 I thought the same thing about the first year of marriage being the hardest!! Um, no, we were together for 3 years before we got married and literally nothing changed except we wore rings and combined bank accounts...

kap1988 · February 2017

@OctoberLove13 People really do have a strange desire to suck away your excitement about a new baby. I am in my late twenties, this baby was planned. I'm not a teenager. I know that having a new baby will be challenging. You really don't need to make comments like "you know she's gonna wake you up every two hours right?" Thank you Captain Obvious. It's like they feel all wise because only they can truly "know" the suffering I'm about to endure. *eye roll* I'm already growing tired of the unwanted comments/advice and she's not even out yet.

kap1988 · February 2017

Our first year of marriage was awesome and we didn't even live together before hand. I was expecting it to be hard and it wasn't at all. We did date for 2 years and were engaged for 8 months. I think that saying comes from back when people only knew each other like 6 months and it was on a much more superficial level.

OctoberLove13 · February 2017

@kap1988 yes!! I think most of the people that make negative comments had unexpected pregnancies. I could see how that would dampen someone's excitement about a new baby but this baby was definitely planned and I'm more than excited to meet him!

Happyhiker · February 2017

@OctoberLove13, it gets way better after baby is here! Yes, there are still aches and pains and insomnia. But now, I'm up cuddling my 3-day old while feeding her instead of up for no good reason other than discomfort. It's so worth it!!!

Burrberrymum · February 2017

@ShaunaT25 I'm so sorry I laughed at that comment but WHY are people so ridiculously obnoxious. I used to have a client that called me a kangaroo when he would see me.. I get it but still not funny.

Burrberrymum · February 2017

My B fest is about SO today. The stress of pregnancy and moving is making me annoyed with everything about him. I've been pretty good at keeping it on the DL so he doesn't see how annoyed I am but literally all he's been doing is catering to everyone else but his family or taking NAPS on the couch because he has a "headache". I've packed everything on my own.. have been taking care of DD, cleaning the house, making sure I'm cooking 3 meals a day so she doesn't starve. My body hurts from trying to take care of everything.. guys moving is hard so late in pregnancy. Every day he has been telling me the things he's going to do or says he's going to get started on something and just doesn't!

Tonight he starts telling about a conversation he had with the neighbour and the guy told him I shouldn't be packing all by myself etc.. so I took that as an opportunity to say Mr. Neighbour guy is right and I need help. He decides to go on about how he did a bunch of dishes and laundry LAST WEEK.

But.. In his defense, and this is why I'm trying not to make a big deal out of it, he is working 2 busy jobs, one that he's up at 6am works til 2 then he goes in to the second job at 4pm until 10pm.. and he just started a business that's really been taking off so he has clients he's catering to left right and center. He really doesn't get a day off. I guess that justifies having a headache and taking naps. But in my defense..... Napping infront of a tired 9 month pregnant woman while she's packing the entire house is asking for her to be crabby.

MrsFlemingo · February 2017

Just wanted to rant about our cat who has been consistently been pissing me off since I was about 23 weeks along. He meows for attention and to be let outside for a stroll around the yard but needs to be supervised, and he is extremely attached to DH, who works as a supply teacher so his hours aren't consistent which throws off the cat when he leaves. I'm at my wits end, either about to put him outside..which he is NOT an outdoor cat, or to leave the house all day until DH comes home. He wakes us up in the night with meowing, anywhere from 1 to 5 in the morning, to be fed yet we constantly are filling his food bowl. I feel like he has us wrapped around his paw..and my DH has SUCH a soft spot for cats so he only gets the frustration with the nighttime meowing because it also affects him. My nightmare is that when the babe is born, he (the cat) will get up when I do night feedings and meow incessantly!

I don't expect any responses to training our stubborn cat, but it just feels good to vent my frustrations!

RunBooRun · February 2017

kap1988 said:

Our first year of marriage was awesome and we didn't even live together before hand. I was expecting it to be hard and it wasn't at all. We did date for 2 years and were engaged for 8 months. I think that saying comes from back when people only knew each other like 6 months and it was on a much more superficial level.

That's really unfair to say. We were together for 6 years before we got married and our first year of marriage was ridiculously hard. We knew each other inside and out, but we didn't live together before marriage. It was a huge adjustment for us. Everything is awesome now.

wintersong · February 2017

I think the rule of thumb is that everyone is different. It is important to know that the first year of marriage CAN be hard and you might have to work at it. It's better than being blindsided with problems you didn't know your have, you know?

vino831 · February 2017

longliveregina this is me every.single.night

@shaunat25 – you have GOT to be kidding?!?!?!

@burrberrymum - Sounds like you are balancing your frustration and acknowledging his work load which is amazing and ofc most important. That being said……dishes and laundry LAST WEEK huh?! Why in the world do men feel like they need validation and praise for tiny things that they do that they feel like is outside of their “wheelhouse?!”

DizzyMom I was going to say something similar. People are shocked when my default response is – “she can show up whenever she wants. I’m in no rush. Or hey she’s easier to transport like this!” J Then people usually direct to comments about how hard it will be to have a newborn with an 17 mo. While I know it’s not going to be easy my preferred response is “how great its going to be!!” People….. ugh.

kap1988 · February 2017

RunBooRun said:

kap1988 said:

Our first year of marriage was awesome and we didn't even live together before hand. I was expecting it to be hard and it wasn't at all. We did date for 2 years and were engaged for 8 months. I think that saying comes from back when people only knew each other like 6 months and it was on a much more superficial level.

That's really unfair to say. We were together for 6 years before we got married and our first year of marriage was ridiculously hard. We knew each other inside and out, but we didn't live together before marriage. It was a huge adjustment for us. Everything is awesome now.

I apologize @runboorun that was kind of thoughtless of me to say.

rw3190 · February 2017

Seriously uncomfortable

Hip pain so bad I have a hard time sitting and laying on my right side.

My legs literally reverberate with pain and my toes go numb.

Recently Ive added nausea back to the list of fun......

Im ready for my little guy to arrive.

ShannonJ96 · February 2017

I'm with all of you on the stupid comments people make. I've honestly grown to dread talking to my fiance's family because of them. His grandmother is the worst about it. Every damn day its "It'll be any day now," "Sleep while you can," "Babies are so hard, and you have no idea what you're getting into," "Is he still really active? You know they slow down when it gets towards the end. Did your doctor tell you that?", "Are you having any inklings yet?", or my personal favorites "How are you feeling?" or "How's the morning sickness? Are you feeling sick right now?" God, I just want to smack her! I can't stand talking about the pregnancy with people anymore. If I hear any of these ever again, I'm going to strangle the person that says them to me.

On to my real bitchfest. Also about his family. I have told them several times in the last few months that I don't want anyone besides my fiance at the hospital when I give birth. Last night he and I went up to the kitchen, and his mother (whom I truly hate) actually asked me if they could be in the waiting room. My fiance knows how important it is to me that people not be there or be bothering us kver the phone at that time, and he agrees with me that they don't need to be there. But does he say anything to them? No. His mother and grandmother are both the types of people that would walk into the room to "check on me" or "help," and they would do so without knocking. I don't have any filter when I'm in pain, and I would undoubtedly tell them to go f*** themselves. I don't understand why they don't get that this is a very private thing, and not a spectator sport. They're just so damn intrusive and have no concept of personal boundaries. If they want to be helpful and supportive, they'll leave me the hell alone. But I'm selfish for wanting peace and quiet.

Oh, and his mother apparently "sleeps with one ear open" so she can hear us if we leave at night. My fiance promised me that he wouldn't tell them when I go into labor, but apparently I have to expect them to know anyway. If they know, they'll get in the way. If they get in the way, again, I'll have no filter at that point. It would be bad. FML

mecoats · February 2017

Another day of I wish I was on maternity leave. Some people are ridiculously helpless.

Spartanrd4 · February 2017

I did a lecture at work today and sat down the entire time- no f's given anymore lol

Goodmorning12 · February 2017

I wore flip flops to work...in Boston, in the winter...s balmy winter...but I did it...rockin corporate America to the core

MrsBinPA · February 2017

@goodmorning12 I have been wearing flip flops around in the Philly burbs the last week (thank you Mother Nature for the unseasonably warm temps). I haven't worn them to work YET but may do it too. No shame!! Gotta do what you gotta do!

ngcsugirl1112 · February 2017

@ShannonJ96 I want the same as you...how we are dealing with it? No one gets a phone call until the baby comes and we are ready for visitors. I know that may be hard with your situation

I know my parents would be very respectful, but his family would be at the hospital and/or blowing up our phones asking how things are moving along. We don't want to deal with all that, so the only people that will know is our neighbors since they're going to take care of our dog while we're at the hospital until my parents make it to our house. Hugs to you about this...overbearing MILs are the worst.

kjd291 · February 2017

I'm SO glad our birth center this time has visitation hours!! My MW said the hours are super super lax and if we anyone to break them, they can-BUT we can use them as an excuse to keep people from coming who we don't want to!

my MIL was waiting in the hospital parking lot when my DH texted her telling her we were ready for company that day. Hah. So I feel you ladies! Just remember--the nurses are your friends! They WILL NOT let anyone into the unit without your permission! Just tell them the situation if there is anyone being non-compliant with your boundaries! That's what they and their locked doors are there for! They deal with cray cray family stuff every day!

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