I am a little, but for sentimental reasons. I feel like I'm soaking in every moment with DS while it's just me and him because I know these moments are fleeting. He's growing so fast, and I know I will be consumed with the new baby, so when he says he needs me in order to go to sleep, you can bet I crawl into bed and cuddle with him! These days are so incredibly hard sometimes, but my heart is so full, I could just burst.
@Magheeta I have been feeling the same way. I'm overly emotional and sappy about everything! Especially when it comes to DS. But in general just knowing that our family of 5 is growing to a family of 6 and how things will be changing. Gets me a little weepy.
@kirstinh88@magheeta I'm with you on this! I just want to hold on to DD and not let go! Get in as many snuggles as possible from now until baby girl comes
Yesterday, I saw something that made me think, there is still good in this world. I was at a sandwich shop picking up lunch, and an employee from the grocery store next door walked a visually impaired woman in. The employees knew who she was, met her at the door, walked her to her favorite booth, and asking how her week was going. I could immediately tell that they go above and beyond for her, probably on a weekly basis, and I thought to myself, there are still good, decent people left in this world. Then I cried the whole way back to the office.
I'm with you guys about savoring every moment with DS as an only child.
I feel like this echos the symptoms thread, but I to the point of tears I'm so tired. Work has ramped up a ton and I just cry morning and night before and after work. It's so pathetic because I like my job and being busy, but I just feel like I'm being punished.
@rachelmiller03 I used to work at a pizza restaurant. We had a regular customer who was in a wheelchair who would come in by himself all the time. He lived around the corner. Everyone on staff knew him. As soon as he rolled in (the doors had handicap push buttons for automatic open), someone on staff would get his diet soda, make his salad, and help get his money out. We also had a regular homeless lady named Ms. Jackson come in and I would always give her a bag of chips and/or any pizza that we had a mess up order on. She was such a sweet lady.
So, it is looking very likely that DH will get the job at the brewery that he was doing a working interview for most of the week. Probably, but not 100% sure. But, we won't know for sure for 2-3 weeks. I found that out yesterday and sobbed ugly tears on and off all the rest of the day. So, I will be 35/36 weeks pregnant before we know if we have a livable income. So, we probably won't be able to move into an apartment until April 1st, which is 38 weeks for me. I am just so tired. I am so emotionally and spiritually worn out by my life. I just want to quit. We will never, ever get a single break from the world. It isn't fair. And are we just supposed to sit here for the next couple weeks hoping this works out? If it doesn't work out it will be too late to do anything else and I'm not sure our marriage will survive what will need to happen if DH doesn't get this job.
After all of this I talked to my mom on Skype for 3 hours last night. It helped a little bit, but at the end of the day there is no one that can really fix this unless they just want to give us a million dollars to get us through the next few years or something. It is such a lonely feeling.
Me: 28 year old SAHM/Birth Doula DH: 30 year old pneumatic electrical engineer
Married: October 8, 2011
DD1: September 24, 2013 BFP: June 25, 2016 and MC: July 3, 2016 DD2: April 16, 2017 BFP: November 30, 2018 EDD: August 14, 2019
@mrsstuessy I'm sorry that you won't find out about DH's job for such a long period of time. Why do they take that long to make a final decision? I know it's hard going another possible month with your life up in the air and no apartment. Big hugs to you. Try to keep a positive mindset that the job is coming, but there is just a bit of a waiting period.
@KirstinH88 I'm not entirely sure. I guess the handful of people who have been supervising him this week need to have a meeting before they decide. He has actually been trying out a couple of jobs, so they will be deciding which one is the best fit as well. One of the people who needs to be at the meeting has a vacation for a week, maybe next week? So, that is part of the delay. Also, I was so pissed off at DH yesterday. He is just a very timid person and I feel like he isn't speaking up for himself enough. Like, I'm pretty sure if it was me I could get an answer from them sooner, but he doesn't feel confident enough to force an answer a little sooner. The man needs to learn how to be an adult in the world, honestly. His interpersonal skills are basically non-existant. They have all but told him they are going to hire him. But, it isn't officially so it is still possible for anything to happen and with our luck I definitely live my life expecting the worst now.
Me: 28 year old SAHM/Birth Doula DH: 30 year old pneumatic electrical engineer
Married: October 8, 2011
DD1: September 24, 2013 BFP: June 25, 2016 and MC: July 3, 2016 DD2: April 16, 2017 BFP: November 30, 2018 EDD: August 14, 2019
@kcasset sorry you are feeling so stressed! That's so tough this late in pregnancy
@mrsstuessy I'm glad things sound positive for the job but so sorry you may have to wait so long! I really hope they make a decision quicker for you and that you will soon be on a positive, upward trend!
@mrsstuessy I'm sorry they're taking so long. That's really disappointing and frankly I don't know why there's so much process sometimes with jobs just to get an answer. I'm glad it's looking likely at least and I hope it is sooner rather than later and maybe you can at least get moved if not very well settled before baby. It sounds like your husband is more introverted than mine but sometimes I feel the same. Sometimes I feel like Lady MacBeth in the background asking him "has anybody mentioned your possible promotion?" every couple weeks then asking him if he's done anything about it himself. lol.
Anyway, hang in there. It sounds like you're pretty hard on yourself, too. Maybe from 35 weeks on you should allow yourself to live in a mess and trust that it just doesn't matter that much how clean the house is and you deserve to only have to do the bare minimum of laundry and dishes or whatever to get by. You'll make it. The kids won't remember. Your SIL either won't care or will do something herself. Take some time to rest and be mindful of the precious life you're about to bring into the world and let baby have a serene mama.
I'm glad your mom is there to talk to. And I know you've mentioned you have a spiritual background and you know, I do too, so if you ever want to talk about the spiritual side of it all, I'm willing to. I really do feel for your struggle in all this and even if my advice doesn't seem very helpful, I really do believe you'll make it and good things are coming!
Ekzerr
member
Re: Why my pregnant self is crying 2/23
Sorry for all the sap, but now I'm weepy.
Married: 5/30/2013
DSS #1: 5/25/2007
DSS #2: 1/22/2011
DS #3: 7/8/2012
BFP: 3/14/2016 ~ MC: 3/19/2016
DS #4: 4/21/17
Also, just watched the most recent episode of This Is Us. Soft sobs over here!
I'm with you guys about savoring every moment with DS as an only child.
Married: 5/30/2013
DSS #1: 5/25/2007
DSS #2: 1/22/2011
DS #3: 7/8/2012
BFP: 3/14/2016 ~ MC: 3/19/2016
DS #4: 4/21/17
After all of this I talked to my mom on Skype for 3 hours last night. It helped a little bit, but at the end of the day there is no one that can really fix this unless they just want to give us a million dollars to get us through the next few years or something. It is such a lonely feeling.
DH: 30 year old pneumatic electrical engineer
BFP: June 25, 2016 and MC: July 3, 2016
DD2: April 16, 2017
BFP: November 30, 2018 EDD: August 14, 2019
Married: 5/30/2013
DSS #1: 5/25/2007
DSS #2: 1/22/2011
DS #3: 7/8/2012
BFP: 3/14/2016 ~ MC: 3/19/2016
DS #4: 4/21/17
DH: 30 year old pneumatic electrical engineer
BFP: June 25, 2016 and MC: July 3, 2016
DD2: April 16, 2017
BFP: November 30, 2018 EDD: August 14, 2019
@mrsstuessy I'm glad things sound positive for the job but so sorry you may have to wait so long! I really hope they make a decision quicker for you and that you will soon be on a positive, upward trend!
DD: 6/20/11
DS: 2/23/13
EDD: 4/15/17
Anyway, hang in there. It sounds like you're pretty hard on yourself, too. Maybe from 35 weeks on you should allow yourself to live in a mess and trust that it just doesn't matter that much how clean the house is and you deserve to only have to do the bare minimum of laundry and dishes or whatever to get by. You'll make it. The kids won't remember. Your SIL either won't care or will do something herself. Take some time to rest and be mindful of the precious life you're about to bring into the world and let baby have a serene mama.
I'm glad your mom is there to talk to. And I know you've mentioned you have a spiritual background and you know, I do too, so if you ever want to talk about the spiritual side of it all, I'm willing to. I really do feel for your struggle in all this and even if my advice doesn't seem very helpful, I really do believe you'll make it and good things are coming!