Weekly Randoms: 2.12

SandNStarsNJ · February 2017

It's Grammy night! Though I was more excited before it started... love James Corden as a host and the performances were great but I expected more. I think.

What are are you all up to?

MrsMaryK2016 · February 2017

That Beyoncé performance was... I'm not sure I'm cool enough to "get it".

M and I went to his cousins birthday party yesterday. He skipped all naps from 1p on so he was clearly exhausted. He went to bed at 8 and just got up at 1 to nurse. A really good stretch! Too bad I stayed up to watch Beyoncé be weird

m6agua · February 2017

I though Beyoncé was weird too. I stopped watching at that point because The Walking Dead was on. It was a great episode!

SandNStarsNJ · February 2017

Ou good to know @m6agua! I DVR it and usually let a few catch up in case the episodes are slow, which they were for the most part this past fall. I'll have to watch today.

kristah2 · February 2017

Ugh Beyoncé. I actually do not like her and I wasn't sure why. Then I watched that performance and I remembered... why are you trying to be so... Virgin Mary like??

I have to head out and finish getting a couple gifts for H since he will officially be a lawyer on Friday. I'm being lazy but we're expecting almost 50cm of snow tomorrow and the MIL gets here Wednesday night (FML) so today is my only day to go. Send motivation?

kvruns · February 2017

I finally got around to getting maternity stuff out of the closet. My old clothes fit so weird. Thank goodness for stretchy skinny jeans so I have pants that fit but I have this awful pouch above my C section scar and then I have a lovely big muffin top too which is attractive only if I'm wearing a hoodie

SandNStarsNJ · February 2017

Good luck @kristah2! IL can be a challenge- to put it nicely.

Despite the pooch at least you're in your old clothes @kvruns! I'm not and probably won't be for a long while. Thank goodness for leggings.

And I know quite a few if you are within 10lbs or so if your prepregnancy weight, but I am VERY far off and not losing with any success. I'm getting very discouraged because I'm doing so much better than I did postpartum with my first. I just need a little loss to feel a little successful here. I miss my cute clothes.

kvruns · February 2017

@SandNStarsNJ well my old jeans were all stretchy and a bit big pre-pregnancy so that is why they at least button and are comfortable. I tried on shorts for my trip later this month and they didn't fit since there is no stretch. I think I'll be bringing my maternity shorts with me.

You did the Whole 30 right? I always thought that was good for weight loss? Although if you already ate healthy before it maybe it doesn't do as much as someone (like me) who eats terribly

m6agua · February 2017

@sandnstarsnj Don't get discouraged! Own your body. I know my friend had trouble loosing weight while BF because of keeping up the caloric intake needed to produce.

As for me I was back to pre-pregnancy weight 5 days after birth because of the flu, it was miserable. I have slowly gained a bit back and am about 10 lbs heavier. I for sure have the belly pouch and my clothes fit very differently. Also the stretch marks all over my belly, most weren't there when I was pregnant but are now. Right now its tough because I have an incision at my belly button going down about 2 inches and 3 small ones up higher across my abdomen. I think as I get back to the gym and work on getting my ab muscles back, my skin will maybe tighten and the stretch marks will be less noticeable. I also need to start eating better again.

SandNStarsNJ · February 2017

Whole30 isn't meant to be for weight loss but it usually does for me. The first time I did Whole30 I lost 12 lbs in the 30 days and continued to follow the guidelines for another 3 months, losing 2-3lbs weekly. Then I started re-introducing some foods for a bit and maintained until I did another Whole30 and dropped an additional 4. That brought me to this pregnancy where about half way through I proceeded to eat horribly. Post labor I dropped about 30lbs and then did Whole30 where I dropped 7. But I am still WAY above my prepregnancy weight and am feeling kind of hopeless because despite still following Whole30 up until about a week ago, I can't shed a mere tenth of a pound.

That was probably a lot of unnecessary venting... I'm just frustrated that I seem to be unable to shed weight when BF (for the second time now). Though it wouldn't be a problem if I didn't gain so much when I'm pregnant.

kristah2 · February 2017

It's not all about the weight sadly. I am down LOWER than my pre pregnancy weight but majority of my clothes won't some anywhere near me. I have 1 pair of jeans I can wear (I should add they we're bought right before I got pregnant when I had weight on) the rest won't go up over my thighs. My shirts... unless it's super stretchy it isn't fitting. And I have to wear a dress on Friday... not one of my many will fit. They won't zip up!!!
My new shape is making me really sad.

MrsMaryK2016 · February 2017

kristah2 said:

It's not all about the weight sadly. I am down LOWER than my pre pregnancy weight but majority of my clothes won't some anywhere near me. I have 1 pair of jeans I can wear (I should add they we're bought right before I got pregnant when I had weight on) the rest won't go up over my thighs. My shirts... unless it's super stretchy it isn't fitting. And I have to wear a dress on Friday... not one of my many will fit. They won't zip up!!!
My new shape is making me really sad.

This is what I'm afraid of. I'm still 10 lbs heavier but I can tell the shape of my body has changed. I was already hourglass shaped but now it's exaggerated. I never minded my shape before but I'm afraid I will look really hippy now in tight dresses. And, just like @kvruns, I have the csection pooch. Ahhh pregnancy, the gift that keeps on giving.

SandNStarsNJ · February 2017

I know we all have different bodies, but if it gives those of you with some new dimensions any hope, with my first, it took close to 18 months post partum but my hips eventually returned to their original size. If BF you're still producing hormones that affect your body's responses. So it might take a while but there's still very much a possibility that everything will return to prepregnancy status.

jsmai · February 2017

Am I alone in still having nearly weekly meltdowns? LO seems to be going through a growth spurt right now and is pretty much inconsolable unless she is feeding or being held. After a lot of fighting and crying I got her down for a much needed nap and the dog went off at the squeaky microwave hinge. LO rarely naps for longer than 30 minutes and it took me nearly that long to get her down. So when the dog woke her up not minutes after I got her down and finalllllllly made myself something to eat, I lost it.

I have to remind myself that just because I don't love EVERY second of motherhood doesn't mean I don't love being a mom.

Thanks for letting me vent.

lcm4390 · February 2017

Anyone else a little uncomfortable with Mother in law around baby when your not there?? I feel a
little crazy and over bearing but I'm going back to work this Saturday and saturdays only so H can be home with baby and he just told me his mother asked if he wanted her to come over.. I'm feeling so anxious about it already. For one I don't have a great relationship with his mother because I never met her until 5 years into our relationship, and she just seems super out of it all the time.

SandNStarsNJ · February 2017

You're not alone @jsmai. In my experience though, this will amount for a small amount of time and you find yourself enjoying more than getting PO. The first 3-5 months can be a real challenge.

@lcm4390 - YES. My MIL doesn't actually follow a single thing I ask. She nods her and reassures me all be well and then doesn't do any of it. And the worst part is that she lies and says she did when there's evidence she hasn't. Not to mention her experience with newborns up until my kids is formula feeding only, so not matter how many times I say it, she still tries to microwave the bottle (second kid btw). Trust in your DH and try to enjoy your adult day at work. At least that's what I try to do.

lajoliedreamer · February 2017

@jsmai When I was home with LO, I would have regular breakdown days like that, too, just substitute the dog for a mouthy cat. An unexpected bonus of going back to work is less breakdowns because I'm not dealing with nap time most days. She still only sleeps about 30 minutes at a time at daycare.

lcm4390 · February 2017

@SandNStarsNJ - I feel like this is my exact worry that she won't follow what I ask to be done while I'm gone. Plus I'm crazy about making sure everyone washes their hands especially people who smoke which my MIL does, it drives me absolutely crazy that she always smells of cigarettes. Iwish my DH would spend the first day with our LO on his own since he never has yet, to see if he can handle it and to see a little of what it's like everyday to take care of our little guy. Im sure it will be a stressful first day back at work but your right I should try to enjoy an adult day.
Also the bottle in the microwave thing drives me nuts, I don't know why they insist its okay to warm a bottle in the microwave, especially when I have a perfectly working bottle warmer on the counter. Feels nice to vent a little lol

MrsMaryK2016 · February 2017

@jsmai Definitely not alone! Had three complete meltdowns last week: 1) M hates the car and threw a fit on the way to my SIL and we ended up back at home; 2) My husband refuses to let me vent about frustration with the baby and is always offering "solutions " instead; 3) M is terrible about bedtime and fights sleep like crazy and took forever to get to bed the other night to the point that I didn't get to eat dinner until 11:30. All of these resulted in full on ugly crying so you're for sure not alone.

SandNStarsNJ · February 2017

MrsMaryK2016 said:

Snip
2) My husband refuses to let me vent about frustration with the baby and is always offering "solutions " instead;

This has got to be a guy thing. I'm not big on gender stereotypes but they always have a solution instead of just listening.

@lcm4390 - Vent away! With our first DH made sure he was NEVER alone. He ran to his parents all the time until he realized they don't do things our way and he didn't like that.

MrsMaryK2016 · February 2017

@SandNStarsNJ At one point he said that if I wasn't going to take any of his solutions then it was my fault there was an issue and to stop complaining to him about it because he doesn't want to hear it... Yeah, he got an earful about that believe me. And the funny thing is, I just need to hear him say I'm doing a good job and that I'm a good mom and I would shut up!

SandNStarsNJ · February 2017

Oh wow! I know what you mean @mrsmaryk2016. I only know he credits me for our kids' awesomeness because he tells my mom and his parents and then they tell me.

MrsMaryK2016 · February 2017

Ugh, men!!

desoky01 · February 2017

All of this is so normal and spot on! My H always tries to fix it or wants me to stop complaining too. Sometimes I just want to complain! And I have MIL troubles too, I can't always put my finger on it but she irks me for some reason. To me she doesn't look natural with LO, and so I think it sets my anxiety off. She has MS and has walked around with LO when she said she wouldn't, and since her balance is bad it makes me so nervous. I feel awful, but her strength and coordination isn't the greatest so I think I have underlying fear that she will drop him even when sitting.

SandNStarsNJ · February 2017

That's scary @desoky01! You have every right to be nervous. I also find how IL handle LO to be uncomfortable but for no actual reason - my SIL insists on bouncing when I sway or my MIL holds him facing out while I hold him against my chest but those aren't legit worries like yours.

kvruns · February 2017

Vent away ladies! I don't have the IL issues but I do know what you mean about someone not doing it your way - i have a hard time when my parents have my LO and he gets worked up and they try to calm him and I just want to take him bc I can comfort him quicker vs him getting insanely worked up.

hjmommaplus1 · February 2017

@jsmai- you're definitely not alone. LO went to daycare for the first time yesterday as a test since I go back to work today. When DH got home with her, he said I was acting like a totally different person and looked a lot less stressed. It's amazing what a baby free day did for my sanity!

kvruns · February 2017

Anyone have any bibs you love or are they a dime a dozen? M is spitting up and drooling like crazy and soaks through bibs in no time. I have one with a plastic backing but rest are cotton. Am I just doomed for wet shirts on him ?

jsmai · February 2017

kvruns said:

Anyone have any bibs you love or are they a dime a dozen? M is spitting up and drooling like crazy and soaks through bibs in no time. I have one with a plastic backing but rest are cotton. Am I just doomed for wet shirts on him ?

I went with quantity over quality. I change them out every other diaper change it seems.

lcm4390 · February 2017

@kvruns Someone got me
one of these burp cloth/bibs as a gift and it is by far my favorite!! I definitely recommend, they wash well too and fluff right back up.
https://m.toysrus.com/product/index.jsp?productId=17999206

m6agua · February 2017

Yes! The A+A burpy bibs are my favorite as well!

kvruns · February 2017

I'm technically back to work today. I'm working from home Wed-Fri this week, all next week, PTO the following week and then back in the office March 6th. We will see how well it goes working from home with a newborn

lajoliedreamer · February 2017

Good luck, @kvruns!

kvruns · February 2017

thanks @lajoliedreamer it's a good thing I don't have a lot to do right now, just monitoring emails mostly bc B has been extra clingy today and I feel bad ignoring him.

SandNStarsNJ · February 2017

I reintroduced dairy and grains into my diet over the last week and LO has been crazy gassy. When he gets super upset only one thing calms him down: stripping him to his diaper, laying him on something soft, and tickling him. This is weird.

lajoliedreamer · February 2017

E loves being stripped down to her diaper. If I start taking her clothes off when she's fussy she will almost always calm down instantly. I bet she would also really like the soft surface.

Are most of you okay with tickling? We're a "no tickling' family until she's old enough to give permission. I have memories of being tickled when I didn't want to be and hated that people would tell me that I must have enjoyed it because I was laughing, when it was just torture. I want to make sure that boundary is there with E from the start.

SandNStarsNJ · February 2017

I should clarify tickling. I gently move my fingertips along his chest, torso, etc. it's calming to him. It's not the arising laughter crazy kind of tickling. I personally hate being tickled.

kvruns · February 2017

Moms of boys - how do you stop them from peeing on themselves (or you)? I've always just used a paper towel and it worked until a couple days ago and now he'll pee through it and end up peeing on his shirt or the changing table. I don't want to cover it with a diaper because then I feel like I'm wasting a diaper?

kvruns · February 2017

Mine usually doesn't like being stripped down, heck when the onesie comes off for a clothing change he usually screams at me. Sigh. I tickle B, more of just the motion than anything but he laughs like it is a game. I've never thought of tickling as a negative thing, although my H doesn't like it

tigerfish227 · February 2017

@kvruns I haven't been peed on for a while but I usually just cover him with a wipe if I'm leaving him naked for more than just a quick diaper change.

desoky01 · February 2017

@kvruns my little boy used to pee all the time, for some reason he doesn't do it very much anymore. We used to open the diaper, let the air touch his little penis (or even blow on it to get the cold air on it) and then hold the used diaper over it for a little while to wait for the pee. When he was peeing all the time on us or in the new diaper it worked pretty well! Sometimes it took awhile for him to pee though. And you had to kind of peek and wait for it to start flowing. It wasn't perfect, but it worked for us.

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