TTCAL Check In 1/16/17

TScalei · January 2017

1. Introduce yourself if your new.

2. Status -WTO, TWW, Benched

3. Rants/Raves

4. GTKY - What have been your best TTCAL distractions?

TScalei · January 2017

1.

sprkls8506 · January 2017

1. Not new. MMC in Nov. Chemical pregnancy in Dec.

2.CD5

3. Sometimes I swear all I see is pregnant people. Some days it's fine. Other days it makes me so sad.

4. Distractions. The holidays. Some parts are hard obviously but I throw myself into decorating and projects

TScalei · January 2017

1.

SP128 · January 2017

1. Introduce yourself if your new. Not new. MMC Oct

2. Status -WTO, TWW, Benched - 13DPO

3. Rants/Raves - .5 temp drop this morning. Just waiting for the inevitable.

4. GTKY - What have been your best TTCAL distractions? Haven't found any yet for when I am by myself. I'm usually ok if I am with others.

laeberge3 · January 2017

1. Not new, but we've had a lot of new members lately so to refresh: I'm 30, H is 32. Had a natural MC in Feb 2016 at 10 weeks (baby measured 6w). CPs in Oct and Dec 2016. After this first loss, this is cycle 6. Began testing with RE in Dec 2016 with suspected PCOS/ovulation dysfunction and RPL.

2. Status - TWW, 3 DPO per FF.

3. Rants/Raves: I have today off! I plan on making meals for the week, prepping for an interview I have tomorrow, doing some laundry, and hanging out with my pups.

4. GTKY - What have been your best TTCAL distractions? Whatever they are, they're not great! Ha. Over the year, it's been going to various sporting events with H (he's an athletic director). Now it's helping to plan my sister's wedding. That's a very welcome distraction!

@sparkles8506 Yes, the holidays were a good distraction too! I also love decorating. Sorry you're seeing pregnant ladies everywhere.

TScalei · January 2017

1

mylittleversailles · January 2017

1. Super old, not new in the slightest.

2. CD 8, WTO in my first Clomid cycle. Fertile CM atm, so treating myself as fertile, but doubt it.

3. Rants: I have such a busy week, but I don't feel like that will help distract me from the obsessive thoughts and feelings surrounding my first medicated cycle. The one year anniversary of my loss is next week (that's right - I blew waaaaaaay past my due date to another horrible milestone), so that's heavy, but I think I'm going to be all right. I scheduled acupuncture for that day and I'm taking a weekend away with my friends in Montreal right after.

Raves: Had a particularly good weekend! Saw a lovely friend Friday, went for a hike and to an incredible winter market Saturday, and kicked it at home Sunday. It was so perfectly balanced, which is really satisfying to me.

4. We worked really hard at distractions and basically turned our lives upside down after loss to aid in the healing process. It's just no one told us that we may be infertile after one early loss, so I've kinda run low on ideas lately. In no particular order we

- Started an urban container garden. First time I ever kept a plant alive (actually dozens) and it turned out to be a wildly successful mostly tomato garden from seed. I have litres and litres of preserved tomatoes in the cupboard that I grew on one of the busiest streets in North America! I think I'm going to get a certificate in landscaping - all because we wanted to try to grow a little something.

- Learned to cook Indian food.

- Joined my neighbourhood association. Volunteered feeding the farmers who sell at our local market. I'm on the planning committee for the tenth anniversary of that market this year.

- Started wine tasting. We're not really drinkers, but I read a book on biodiversity (Bread Wine Chocolate: The Slow Loss of the Foods We Love) and it was so life changing and formative that we enrolled in a course to learn to taste and now we have this unbelievably soul rousing pleasure to indulge in every once and a while.

- Started making preserves en masse. Not just dill pickles and jam; I preserved every vegetable and fruit I could get my hands on and now we get to enjoy wonderful food in the middle of winter. Learning to ferment now.

Basically, when you learn new things and delve into uncharted waters, you are teaching your brain new ways of coping - which are hopefully healthy and keep your mind active. It's made fighting off the depression that so often comes along with grief so much easier.

TScalei · January 2017

1. Not new but mmc in March 2016 and another in August 2016.

2. CD 2.

3. Rant: Every month when AF comes it just hits me really hard. This month was particularly hard bec I got pg with my first loss last Jan and it took me 3 cycles to get pg with my second and this was my third cycle trying post 2nd loss. I just had a lot of hope for this cycle and was disappointed.

Rave - My puppy has been really great yesterday and today with lots of cuddles and kisses. I swear they know when you are sad.

4. I have been reading a ton since my first loss and have found that to be a great distraction. Planning weekend getaways and trips gives me something to plan and look forward too. And we got a puppy - what am I missing? Lol

TScalei · January 2017

Im so sorry for the multiple posts today I had some trouble mobile bumping.

@sprkls8506 - I hear you about pg people everywhere I feel that way too. I get out of the house to try to distract myself and there is a pg woman! ugh.

@laeberge3 - GL with your interview! Thats fun planning your sisters wedding. I am helping my best friend plan hers but it also brings up the feelings of what stage I will be in when she gets married - post baby, very pg, little bit pg, or not pg at all. Picking out dresses yesterday 2 hours after I got AF did not help either. But all in all it is a good reminder that life goes on and good things are still happening.

@reneeannem - Hugs for the tough anniversary this week! The anniversary of my first BFP is coming up at the end of the month. Its hard bec I never thought I would be hitting these anniversaries not pg.

You will have to let me know how you like Montreal. Thinking of planning our next trip to Montreal and Quebec City. I love all your distraction ideas too.

mylittleversailles · January 2017

@TScalei Oh, I L O V E Montreal. And Quebec is gorgeous. I lived in Montreal for three years; it's where I met and married DH! It's the best place to visit, though I would never live there again. Highly recommend both cities; they are so alive in the warmer months. You will need a phrasebook for Quebec - no speaks English there, but in Montreal most everyone is bilingual and very nice to tourists.

TScalei · January 2017

@reneeannem - oh awesome thank you! Paris is one of my dream destinations but since that is not really in the cards right now _ i thought Montreal and Quebec City would be the next best thing.

mylittleversailles · January 2017

@TScalei Happy to make more specific recommendations for Montreal, if you happen to need

Uhlease13 · January 2017

1. Me 29, dh 31, mmc oct 2015, mmc oct 2016

2. Cd 4

3. Rants/Raves: none at the moment. Eager for next FW. I scheduled my next pap and it falls right at the end of the TWW, so I'm kind of excited to have an appt and be able to ask a lot of questions (pg or not)

4. Agree with pp that being around people provide a great distraction, but being alone with my thoughts hasn't been easy.

MimoCa · January 2017

1. Introduce yourself if your new.
Not new. I'm 30 DH 33. MC Aug and MMC Dec

2. Status -WTO, TWW, Benched
I'm benched for the time being.

3. Rants/Raves
I'm trying to stay positive so not rants but unfortunately not much to rave about either lol

4. GTKY - What have been your best TTCAL distractions
I don't think I need must distraction from TTCAL since I work nearly everyday. I have one day off a week and everything else in life is trying to get me too haha but staying positive! 2017 yall!!

@sprkls8506 holidays and decorations are great distractions.
@laeberge3 hope you enjoy your day off today!
@reneeannemm wow your distractions ideas are very interesting. I'm hoping in the next couple months I can start easing off work and start learning some new things too!
@TScalei weekend getaway are awesome. DH and I used to always do road trips often a few years ago!
@Uhlease13 yes having other people around are a great distraction. I think when you're alone in your thoughts you can go into your head a bit too much.

justsuzie · January 2017

@reneeannemm You inspire me to do more. Seriously.

@MimoCa Working is a great distraction. Weekends are the hardest for me.

@Uhlease13 I agree that being alone sucks, mind wanders.

@TScalei I definitely believe that animals can sense sadness and pain. So happy your pup is bringing smiles to your life.

@laeberge3 Oh, the wedding should be a huge distraction. When's her big day?

AFM

1. Not really new, but recap: Me- 36 DH- 33 Ectopic at a little over 6 weeks along 9/23. CP in August.

2. Status -Benched until next AF BUT we had a little contraception mishap last night and hoping for the best no matter what happen. So pretty much I just added a dollop of stress onto my lap during my benched time. UGH

3. Rave- I've been going to the gym since a couple days after xmas and I can already see result. My thinking is, maybe a healthy body will elicit a healthy mind? And if I don't get KU soon at least I will be in great shape. And if I do get KU exercise will be great during the pregnancy.
Rant- My best friend with a due date a few weeks after mine was supposed to be is starting to show and it's really hard to see it all the time. She has also said that she can't wait until summer when the baby is due and I don't have to work because we can hang out all day at the lake all summer. I don't think I will be able to be around a newborn that much if I am not pg yet. It's stressing me out thinking about it even though it's so far away.

4. GTKY - I have been going to the gym and that is a great distraction. There are NO pg ladies at the gym. It was feeling like everywhere I went I would bump into a belly bump!

splashmountain · January 2017

1. Introduce yourself if your new. Hey all! Still kinda new I guess. I'm 29, DH 33, DS 19 months. Natural MC 12/25/16 at 9w2d.

2. Status - Benched. Still waiting for first AF.

3. Rants/Raves - No work today so rave! Got to sleep in this morning and DH made a fire in the woodstove before he went to work so it's toasty warm in the house

4. GTKY - What have been your best TTCAL distractions? I guess I'll let you know when I firgure it out

I had just started crocheting a hat for the baby but since the loss, I don't want to crochet at all.

@TScalei lol I giggled every time I saw your "1" post. Sorry TB is being a pain.
@sprkls8506 I know! How are there so many pregnant women?!
@SP128 and @Uhlease13 I completely understand. Alone time is not my friend.
@laeberge3 I'm glad you're having fun helping with your sister's wedding. My brother is getting married and it seems that my future SIL is a bit of a bridezilla....I just keep my mouth shut and do what she tells us to do

@MimoCa yay for positivity! 2017 will be great!
@justsuzie I'm sorry your friend is due at the same time you were. I'm sure the constant reminder is very difficult. Hugs

Edit to add tag

amberruka · January 2017

@reneeannemm I'm sorry about your loss anniversary. On the flip side, I *adore* Montreal, used to go there all the time as a kid (grew up about 2.5 hours south), I'm so jealous!
@mimoCa and @justsuzie I agree, weekends are hardest if I'm not traveling somewhere working, really love the work distraction.

1. Not new, but recap: 7 month bench to control thyroid after CP, 5th cycle TTCAL.
2. TWW, ~3DPO (had 2 days of luteal surge on OPK so may be one day off, don't temp as false elevated temps due to hyperthyroid).
3. R/R: Can't think of anything major.
4. GTKY: just trying to keep to a regular running schedule (aim for 4 days a week), keeps me sane for work as well as TTC. Trying not to focus on my age so much, when I find myself stressing about that I remember I was able to get PG at 37 and the hope returns it may happen again. But still not trying for it to overtake my life--focusing on the future too much makes you miss the present. Even though I'm going back to work in NM in a few weeks (was there last week), DH and I are planning a weekend getaway there in March, and quietly starting to save for return to Ireland/Scotland for our 40th birthdays (in case it doesn't happen).

Mommyamp · January 2017

TScalei said:

1. Introduce yourself if your new.

2. Status -WTO, TWW, Benched

3. Rants/Raves

4. GTKY - What have been your best TTCAL distractions?

1. I'm fairly new. I've been lurking for a while but finally got being able to post sorted out. Just went through my 2nd mc. This one was a 5 week cp. I do gave a rainbow baby sandwiched between my losses which gives me hope. DH and I are hoping for one more to complete our family. I just turned 35, DH is turning 39 next month, so hoping for sooner rather than later. History: 10 week mc 8/2014 and 5 week mc 1/2017. Both natural.
2. WTO. Cd8 We aren't wasting any time and are hoping to get pregnant again right away.
3. I'm pretty laid back so nothing is coming to mind atm.
4. I like to sew and crochet when I'm stressed.

Mack2342 · January 2017

@sp128. I feel the same. I'm good when I'm with others but not so much when I'm alone
@laeberge3 Good luck on interview. Helping with sisters wedding should be fun. I loved planning mine and would love to planning someone's now lol.

@reneeannemm Hugs to you with the upcoming anniversary
@TScalei I totally understand your frustration and sadness. I got pregnant on the 3rd try with each pregnancy so I had high hopes for that month for us too but I'm still here and we are now on the 5th cycle. Hugs to you

@justsuzie Glad you found a place where you can have some time without pregnancy in your face.

@amberruka I hear you on trying not to focus on age. I will be 42 in May. I had my DS at 40.

AFM

1. Introduce yourself if your new. Not new. MC is August. DH and I will both be 42 this year. We have a 16 month old son.

2. Status -WTO, TWW, Benched. WTO. CD6

3. Rants/Raves. Like others I'm off. Had a great weekend with my mom and sister. Didn't do anything except hang out and spend time together. Little bummed that they are gone and headed back to MI.

4. GTKY - What have been your best TTCAL distractions? Just staying busy with family. I like some others and that I'm fine most of time bc I'm surrounded by people it's the alone time that I can't stop thinking about my angel or dreaming of being pregnant again

TScalei · January 2017

@mimoca - love the positivity and hope 2017 the is a better year for you!

@justsuzie - I love you work out mentality - a healthy body will bring about a healthy mind. I think being in the best shape you can be pre pg would be great too.I have definitely gotten out of working out with the newpup, but now she is getting more used to her crate so I don't feel as guilty leaving her to go work out.

@amberruka - Ireland/ Scotland trip sounds amazing. I have been to Ireland and would love to go Scotland. You are right that focusing on the future makes you miss the present.

justsuzie · January 2017

@amberruka 40 is still young! Good luck this cycle. And vacay sounds great.
@Mack2342 I've been having crazy pg dreams lately. I've never had them before. It's depressing when I wake up and realize I was dreaming.

SP128 · January 2017

@justsuzie So sorry about the pg dreams. Just so cruel. Hooray for going back to the gym. Great mentality! Either way, getting in shape will be a win.

@Uhlease13 @Mack2342 @pumpkin0913 Alone time is def not my friend. DH has been gone for most of the weekend so it's been tough. No work + little DH time = mind wandering and sadness. Thinking that AF is on the way does not help with my emotions.

@amberruka Amen to having to focus on the present. Something I'm super bad at.

@laeberge3 Knock 'em dead tomorrow

@sprkls8506 I agree. Preg people are everywhere!

babypi · January 2017

2. Status -WTO, CD6, cycle#2 trying

3. Rants/Raves- I've been blindsided this week with finding out two more of my friends are due in July, right around my EDD. I'm happy for them, but it's been especially tough as AF is lingering, like a nasty little reminder of what I've lost.

4. GTKY - What have been your best TTCAL distractions? House projects and prepping for our move in March have been thankfully keeping me busy.

justsuzie · January 2017

@babypi Its tricky to be happy for friends that are pregnant. It's like your happy then sad for yourself and sometimes jealous too. I feel ya. Hugs.

vlagrl29 · January 2017

Not new - had a CP in December. Currently we are going with the flow regarding TTC. We DTD twice this past weekend. The first time I was more emotional about it. Didn't we talk last week on here about being scared to have sex after a loss. I cried that first time. Well I got upset again last weekend because I felt we were starting over again.

I've been keeping busy as I'm pretty much almost done deep cleaning the first level of our house. I need to get my 1099s out to the players of our trio for their taxes. I've been teaching and just got a new student for this week. I need to catch up on my business which I plan to do this week. I'm hitting yoga like I use to and need to write up a list of poses or transitions I want to improve on. Yep all that is keeping me distracted

Luckyu317 · January 2017

1- I'm new-ish. Posted last week about our loss; twin girls delivered at 17 weeks (7 weeks ago) due to ruptured sac. 2. Status: benched, per our RE. She's recommending we wait 3-4 more months to do our FET to "give my hormones a chance to get back to Normal". I'm hoping we can try in April. 3. Rants/raves: **TW, LC and (not my) BFP mentioned** See #2..I'm debating going off my bc (was on it to prep for our FET). Since we're benched, I kind of want to be off of bc for a month or two and try on our own, even though I know it won't happen (we struggle with 2IF). Also, two ladies from my mom's group from my son's bmb/fb group announced BFPs today. We're a close group, and they're the first ones in our group since my loss.

***editing to add another one*** ran into a friend yesterday who hadn't heard about our loss, so I got to tell the story all over again.. 4. Distractions.. trying to focus on being the best mom I can to our boys, and also trying to focus on losing weight and getting healthier to prep for our FET. I've also been doing small projects around the house that I've been wanting to do for awhile.

babypi · January 2017

Thanks @justsuzie it's really comforting to not feel alone in having these mixed feelings

nalex420 · January 2017

1. Introduce yourself if your new.
Nicole from NYC ....this is my 2nd cycle trying after a mc in Nov. @ 8 weeks. I have a 21 month old daughter

2. Status -WTO, TWW, Benched- cycle day 11....wto

3. Rants/Raves...as I sit here about to enter my fertile week for a 2nd cycle I can't help but think how hard this is and I know many people and some of you have been trying for so long this just sucks....I feel like all I see is pregnant people...my sis on law is due in a month, my best friend is due on what would have been my due date she is having twins, 2 coworkers are pregnant....I never imagined how hard this would be. Sorry for the whining

4. GTKY - What have been your best TTCAL distractions? My amazing 21 month old but with her growing so fast sometimes Ot makes it worse

TScalei · January 2017

@nalex420 - that's the thing that gets me everyday. I never thought this process would be so hard. It seems like everywhere you look people are getting KU - some without even trying. It's just so frustrating. I hope your stay here is short!

Mommyamp · January 2017

There has been an explosion of pregnancy announcements lately. It's rough.

Mack2342 · January 2017

Yes there have been. I have to go to my niece's reveal party end of February. So not looking forward to it. She is 21 and total oops. She is not established and only been with father a few months. Makes me sad and angry!

SP128 · January 2017

I hear you all on all those preg announcements. Within the last couple of days, 2 of my friends told me they going to actively try ASAP for #2. I'm excited for them, but I'm very nervous that they will get preg before me : (

laeberge3 · January 2017

@Mommyamp Sorry for the increase in pregnancy announcements. The holidays always seem to bring them about and it's just been extended this year.

@justsuzie She's pretty excited! She's getting married in May. They had to "one-up" (haha, totally kidding) H and I and plan their wedding in 4 months instead of the 6 months we took. Not gonna lie, I'm already overwhelmed for her, ha!

Man this week is draggggggging. I've been traveling half the week and have barely had time to catch my breath today back in the office. Clients continue to frustrate me and now I've got more work on my plate and no time to get it done. Boo to the craziness that always is January. The one positive: this TWW is moving quickly.

justsuzie · January 2017

@laeberge3 I don't have clients but I deal with parents and lately it seems like I am dealing with parent after parent. And they are never nice, always contacting me about a problem. It would be a nice treat to have some positive interactions with parents instead of only being about a problem.

And yes pg announcements are killing me. Makes me think about how excited I was to tell everyone but never got the chance.

QUESTION: after your looks did any of you get cramping at ovulation time even though you didn't experience it before your loss. This is the second month in a row where I'm getting cramps the day of and the day after o!

Mack2342 · January 2017

@justsuzie. I get cramps around ovulation. I think I'm just paying more attention to my body. Each time I've TTC I've noticed new things about my body that I probably just didn't pay attention to before

justsuzie · January 2017

@Mack2342 I just mentioned in tww that I can't even sneeze without analyzing it. And your totally right that this all could have happened before but I just wasn't clued into it happening.

MimoCa · January 2017

@justsuzie I always get cramping around ovulation and definitely more pronounced after my first MC

Uhlease13 · January 2017

Mack2342 said:

Yes there have been. I have to go to my niece's reveal party end of February. So not looking forward to it. She is 21 and total oops. She is not established and only been with father a few months. Makes me sad and angry!

That's rough. When I was pregnant (and still naive/excited) the first time, I found out my 20 year old cousin was pregnant also. Well I ended up miscarrying at 11 weeks and she went on to have the baby. It's really hard to be at family functions with her and the baby. One day it will be ok, but for now it's still hard for me.

Hope the reveal goes ok, but feel free to "not feel well" that night and skip it

vlagrl29 · January 2017

Uhlease13 said:

Mack2342 said:

Yes there have been. I have to go to my niece's reveal party end of February. So not looking forward to it. She is 21 and total oops. She is not established and only been with father a few months. Makes me sad and angry!

That's rough. When I was pregnant (and still naive/excited) the first time, I found out my 20 year old cousin was pregnant also. Well I ended up miscarrying at 11 weeks and she went on to have the baby. It's really hard to be at family functions with her and the baby. One day it will be ok, but for now it's still hard for me.

Hope the reveal goes ok, but feel free to "not feel well" that night and skip it

In this situation it might make you feel better knowing she has an oops and while a baby might make her happy her living situation probably sucks. I'd probably skip the reveal

Mommyamp · January 2017

@justsuzie I honestly never noticed ovulation cramping until after my first mc. Like others have said, I don't know if it's new or if I just never paid attention before.

I definitely notice it every month now though.

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