Benched/TTA NYE Check-In

izza2 · December 2016

Long time no check-in, guys. Anyone still Benched/TTA and want to keep this thread up, or should we scrap it for the time being?

Image: https://i.giphy.com/PklKPS0WXrp04.gif

***General TW that this thread can and will mention MC and loss.***

This is a place for those of us who have already started TTC, but have hit a roadblock and are delaying for whatever reason. You can express your thoughts, feelings, and frustrations on not TTC and connect with others who are in the same boat. TTC can be a long journey, and having to wait makes it feel even longer -- even if it is for a good reason. I invite you to resurrect this thread at any point in the week if you have something to say. Treat this like an ongoing conversation.

Benched = involuntarily not NTNP/TTC and "out of the game," usually due to medical reasons
TTA = avoiding pregnancy by using protection or FAM, usually for non-health-related reasons __________________________________________________________________

Are you benched or TTA?

What brings you here?

How long do you think you'll be here?

How have things been going?

Any R/R/CS?

GTKY: What are five non-TTC goals for 2017?

jenotontx · December 2016

Hey hey! I've noticed this thread hasn't been too popular lately but I don't know if I really belong here either way. So I have no opinion on keeping it going ir scrapping it for now.

Are you benched or TTA?
I'm TTA due to personal work related reasons.

What brings you here?
I just started a new job and I have to be with my company for a year before I qualify to take FMLA. So that means I cannot allow myself to get KU before the beginning of April.

How long do you think you'll be here?
April is when we will start TTC. I am going off my BC at the end of January to give my body some time to adjust and to start tracking.

How have things been going?
Not great. See below.

Any R/R/CS?
I had a really difficult time getting accurate info from my company about the FMLA policies. The person from HR was less then helpful and was telling me a lot of crazy things that I knew wasn't intirelly true but was within the companies best interest to say. What I do know is that after I qualify after my 1 year I am supposed to give my company 30 days before I actually take the leave. So origionally I was hoping to start TTC in March but now it has been pushed to April. My DH and I have decided that I will still go off my BC at the end of Jan to give my body time to adjust. I'm really crossing my fingers my body cooperates so it doesn't delay TTC even more.

GTKY: What are five non-TTC goals for 2017?

1. Buy a house
2. Pay off a large anount of student loans
3. Find some type of activity or group to be involved in.
4. Lose some weight... start eating better and working out again.
5. Hopefully meet some people that my DH and I can do things with. We have moved twice in the past 1.5 years and we don't know anyone where we currently live. I really miss having girlfriends around to do things with.

izza2 · December 2016

Regarding the thread:
Up until recently I've really been the only one TTA after having TTC, but I always tried to keep the thread going so that no matter what anyone who was benched had a place they could feel they belonged.
I'd like to keep it going for that reason alone, but, at this point it's whatever everyone else feels would be best. I know it comes and goes for when/if anyone is TTA after TTC, or is benched (and I always prefer that no one ends up benched), but I feel like the "crowd" has kind of waned more often than not.
*shrug*

Are you benched or TTA?
Still TTA

What brings you here?
Schooling

How long do you think you'll be here?
Another 8 months.

How have things been going?
Ehh. I just have so many more moments where I feel like I'm in limbo lately.

Any R/R/CS?
Just stupid costochondritis. Two flair ups over the past 3 months, which is more than I've ever had. I'm hoping that the Whole30 I'm going to try and do this month will help with that. I'm making it a priority to cut out foods that are linked to inflammation, as well.

GTKY: What are five non-TTC goals for 2017?
1. Get healthy/lose weight
2. Pass all of my classes
3. Renovate our upstairs/put in a second bathroom
4. Clear out/go through the attic and have a massive lawn sale
5. Get more stable career-wise

adirat · December 2016

@izza2 @JJMNO1616

Just my two cents but I truly appreciated this thread when I needed it. It was a haven for me for a while. I definitely vote to keep it for anyone who may need it.

stillclever17 · January 2017

Me too. It was the only place I felt like I belonged for most of my ttc journey so far.

[Deleted User] · January 2017

I think the check-in is great, I just prefer not to talk too much about our whole thing in detail on a public board...
<img src="https://us.v-cdn.net/5020794/uploads/editor/1d/yyn45opd9sph.gif" alt="">
For me, as someone who is currently essentially benched indefinitely? I find it hard to identify with the TTA struggles as much, so it's maybe not the kind of support I *personally* feel I need right now, or know how to give to someone who's TTA. I guess that's why I've more been lurking this thread. As I am walking through grief of pretty epic proportion right now, and unfortunately (?) the more it drags on, the less I feel it's even the healthiest thing to keep a presence on a TTC forum at all, kwim? Not that I'd really be able immediately to quit bumping alltogether or something, but whatever. For my own mental/emotional health and well-being, the sake of my relationship and my quality of life, I definitely need to scale back my participation in the New Year.

Great GTKY bc I, for one, need to really remember in a big way that I have a WHOLE LIFE outside of ttc, just waiting for me to rush in. And instead I've been clinging to a dream that may never be. So anyway, that's just where I'm coming from. Not that it has any bearing on anyone else.

Tennis11785 · January 2017

I like having a benched/tta threat. As someone in this space I feel a bit out of place in the tww and wto threads. I like having a space that we can discuss the challenges to this stage.

@BusinessWife - hugs during still stage from you. While I hate to see you go/participate less (I think you bring a wonderful, welcoming, level headed perspective to the board), but I absolutely understand the thought process. You gotta take care of you.

Are you benched or TTA? Benched

What brings you here? Miscarriage

How long do you think you'll be here? I'm on my last officially benched cycle! So unless the Dr tells us something in 1.5 weeks that sets us back, I'll soon be moving back to TTC.

How have things been going? Pretty good so far. I feel like I'm in a really good mental place right now about everything, and I'm pretty optimistic about 2017. Last night, after ordering a rather expensive bottle of wine with dinner, H said "well, go big because this will hopefully be the last nye without kids." To which I responded "yeah, but I'm pretty sure we said that last year." He looked at me and said "well, then consider this a bonus new years party. And if we don't have a baby, we get a bonus party next year too." I liked that thought process.

Any R/R/CS? For the record, I'd rather the baby...than the party...

GTKY: What are five non-TTC goals for 2017?

1 - excell at work
2 - get house super organized
3 - get back into running
4 - cook more
5 - travel more

splashmountain · January 2017

Hi everyone! I just intro'ed over in the newb thread, but I want to check in here as well.

@izza2 I saw this thread was posted and decided I'd re-intro so I could post here. Being benched, I don't feel like I'd belong in the tww or wto threads, so I vote yes to keep this thread going!

Are you benched or TTA? Currently benched, but will continue to tta for a while, not sure how long

What brings you here? Just had a mc last week.

How long do you think you'll be here? I'm not sure. I am having a hard time mentally dealing with the loss, and I know it will take time (it was just one week ago). So until I feel better, I'm taking g a break.

How have things been going? It sucks. There's no need to sugar coat it. But MH is amazing and so helpful and supportive and DS is so funny. They make it easier.

Any R/R/CS? Sorry, didn't mean to sound like such a downer! I'm excited for 2017. It will be an amazing year, I just know it

GTKY: What are five non-TTC goals for 2017?
1 pay off all debt (we're so close...)
2 join the gym (it's helped with depression before so why not)
3 go to more baseball games (go Giants!)
4 spend more time with my family
5 have fun

[Deleted User] · January 2017

@Tennis11785. @pumpkin0913. Welcome! And I'm so very sorry for your loss (es). It's definitely good to focus on the positive and doing the healthy things that we *know* help keep depression at bay, even if it feels like going through the motions. For me, I'm getting up early and getting DH off to work every day, (I may spend some time lounging on the couch with the doggies after he leaves), but once I get going, I make sure doggies are fed, the bed is made, the dishes get washed and the kitchen tidied up, garbages emptied, get showered and dressed (even if it's just more clean loungewear lol).

I do want to incorporate more physical activity into our routine, too, like an actual midmorning dog WALK instead of just watching them/ playing in the yard, and maybe an actual yoga video instead of straight lounging. Lol. But anyway, I do feel like even making a point to do those basic self-/household- care things (laundry, toilets, floors, mealprep), it sounds so basic, but I do think it goes a long way to keeping depression at bay, instead of giving into the temptation to do nothing, and watch the house fall apart around me. ;) (((hugs))) oh! And I had THE BEST soak in the tub yesterday. That was really therapeutic for me, too. ❤

splashmountain · January 2017

@BusinessWife I'm sorry for this difficult time for you. I agree that it's the little things that help. DH's first day back to work after the mc I washed every piece of laundry in the house, organized all of DS's toys (which he promptly dumped out when he woke up) and made my kitchen shine. The next day I went baking crazy. I made about a dozen loaves of banana bread and pumpkin bread.

Some days, as long as I've done something, it feels like a win

slaven · January 2017

Are you benched or TTA? TTA

What brings you here? International move in May, uncertainty about DH being deployed or not after that, and waiting for DH's promotion to get a pay bump so I can be a SAHM

How long do you think you'll be here? At least until October so that DH's pay increases before EDD, perhaps longer if he is with a unit that deploys a lot.

How have things been going? I was non existent here for a while while I was dealing with TTA but I'm okay now. We got a second dog. We went to the shelter to see a Yorkie but DH didn't want her and picked out a Sheltie who happens to have heart worm so that's being treated but she's sweet. She likes to bark at cats though...

Any R/R/CS?
I had an IUD before TTC and had no bad side effects. Due to TTA for at least a year I went on ortho tricylen (low?) but am having some side effects like no sex drive and emotional-ness/random sad thoughts. I have a dr appointment tomorrow to talk about it and hopefully get my blood tested. I think I may be anemic too because I'm constantly cold and my nails became brittle recently despite having strong nails for a long time. The BCP gives me a heavier period so it may be linked.

GTKY: What are five non-TTC goals for 2017?
1. Buy a house if/when we move back to the states
2. Lose weight. Minimum of 15lbs but up to 25. I gained 5 over the holidays

3. Start yoga as a self care thing (not just weight loss)
4. Read a book every month
5. Pay down my student loan debt

As lame as it sounds, I really don't have friends here where we are stationed. It's hard meeting others without having a kid and not being part of the church groups. While TTC this board was a nice place to socialize but now that we're TTA I'm not sure what to do.

@JJMNO1616 it's hard meeting people when you move so much. I think finding a group to be a part of is a great idea. I miss having couple friends.
@izza2 I have read a few books on Whole30 and keep wanting to try it but my grocery options in South Korea are limited by selection and price. I spent $10 on a butternut squash last week! I hope it goes well for you
@BusinessWife I definitely agree that some kind of routine for self care and even basic home cleaning can help with depression and the like. Yesterday morning I was in bed just stuck in a mood. Took my dogs for a quick walk and went to get some nice produce and I felt a bit better after. Obviously it's not the same for everyone but for me it's hard when all I want to do is mope but moping just makes me feel worse.

doxiemoxie212 · January 2017

Are you benched or TTA? TTA

What brings you here? Choice! (used to be benched)

How long do you think you'll be here? Going to start TTC again in May

How have things been going? Fine. DH has decided that for 2017 he wants to have sex every day (haven't yet today so TBD if this even lasts two days) so that should be interesting. Typically when not TTC we bang it out like.... once every two weeks? Maybe? Lol

Any R/R/CS? Nah

GTKY: What are five non-TTC goals for 2017? 1) Go to the gym 4x/week so that this gym membership I've been paying for is actually financially worthwhile, 2) kick ass in my new graphic design program so I don't worry that I've completely ruined my life/career by quitting my job, 3) read more books, 4) stop spending so much money on things we don't need, 5) ....get KTFU? I guess? Whoops, non TTC... uh... start eating breakfast.

jenotontx · January 2017

@BusinessWife I'm so sorry to hear you are currently benched indefinitely and I can completely understand why you wouldn't identify with the TTA crowd. That's why I don't feel like I entirelly belong on this thread. The last thing I want to do is infringe in anyway or make anyone uncomfortable in their safe place. I readily admit that having to hold off TTC because of social/econmic circumstances is way less painful then what I'm sure you (and many other women on this thread) are experiencing. It's really not compairable.

@slavenski It sounds like we have quite a few things in common. No friends, want to buy a house, pay off loans, lose weight...lol. I give you SO much credit though for living over seas and being away from your husband when he is deployed. My DH travels a lot for work but is typically only away for a week at a time.

So Idk if this is really the place to post this so feel free to flame me but I think I am stopping my BC as of now. I was planning to go one more cycle but the more I read TCOYF the more worried I am that it may take awhile for my cycle to regulate after BC. I took my ring out today for my regularly scheduled pseudo AF. So I think I'm just going to say F it and see how things go from here. Something else that has me worried... which this may be the really flamable comment, is that the chapter in TCOYF about PCOS has me a little on edge. As I was reading the symptoms and discription of the condition I identfied A LOT with it. Most of the symptoms I haven't experienced since before I started BC almost 14 years ago (and the symptoms were the reason I went on the BC in the first place) which is exactly what TCOYF says happens to a lot of women. Sooo this has also influenced my decision to stop the BC now because if I do have anything that needs to be addressed I guess I would rather know sooner rather then later. I'm trying not to self diagnose and get too anxious about it but I had one of those lightbulb moments when reading that has me feeling a little worried.

MTgirlCOworld · January 2017

I know I have been in and out so I am not the most reliable source so take it or leave it for what its worth. When I am in I think this is a great source of support.

@JJMNO1616 I feel your pain. I just felt like I got FMLA figured out when I got laid off.
@izza2 That sounds miserable! I am sorry you are going through that. I know people who have loved doing the whole 30. I have done Paleo but not the whole 30. Once I got into it I loved it.
@BusinessWife I am sorry for your struggles. Creepy internet hugs to you. I really don't know what to say, I cannot imagine what you are going through.
@Tennis11785 Sorry for your loss. I am excited that you will be back to TTC soon. I love your hubby's thought process tho!
@pumpkin0913 Welcome! Sorry for your loss. That must be so difficult. Please feel free to join in when you are ready / comfortable.
@slavenski Welcome back! Has your hubby heard where he is getting transferred yet? FX the doc can give you some answers.
@doxiemoxie212 welcome to TTA. Here is hoping you are more patient with it than I am.

Are you benched or TTA? TTA

What brings you here? Lost my job

How long do you think you'll be here? Mid Feb at the earliest.

How have things been going? Um well not so good. Every time we have gotten to a point that we are actually ready to start TTC something happens and we have to push it off. I am an impatient person to begin with so right now I am being super impatient. I go through ups and downs. One day I am totally fine with waiting but the next I am depressed and not wanting to wait anymore. Sorry that was more of a rant.

Any R/R/CS? I have been trying to drop some pounds before we start but my lack of patience I may not. I got laid off in November and I have been trying to find a new job. DH and I agreed that if I don't have any solid leads by mid Feb then we can start trying. If I get KTFU then I will keep looking and try to just negotiate leave or do temp jobs.

GTKY: What are five non-TTC goals for 2017?
1. Lose weight (increase lean mass while losing fat)
2. Find a job.
3. Do some updates around the house.
4. Get better with my diet/workout plan.
5. Try new things

ninnerpoos · January 2017

Those sound like my goals!! I really need girl friends and I know I need to get myself out more... My DH needs friends with wives or gf I can relate to more. That would super help motivate me.

slaven · January 2017

@Sglen3 Not a clue and from what I've heard we may not find out until April.....and we move in May....So much for trying to have a job lined up

jenotontx · January 2017

@Sglen3 I'm so sorry to hear about your job. I've changed jobs twice in the past year due to relocating for my DH job and even though my leaves were planned it still really sucks having to start all over (not to mention the interviewing). I feel like the past two years of my life have reloved around moving and work. All of our life decisions have constantly been waiting on those things to be normal again. I'll keep my FX that you find something new very soon! And maybe it will be even better then what you had before! I can tell you from my experience that I got a raise with each new job I have accepted. So you never know!

MTgirlCOworld · January 2017

@slavenski ugh that is frustrating!!

@JJMNO1616 Thanks!! I hope now that it is the new year things will fall into place. I was going to say to. I think FMLA says that you have to request the time 30 days before you take the leave so you could still start trying in March if you wanted to.

At least that is the way I read it.

jenotontx · January 2017

@Sglen3 It's really unclear to me if I have to be "elgible" prior to giving the 30 days notice. I tried to get an answer from HR but they were really shady about it so I am just going to hold off until April to play it safe.

MTgirlCOworld · January 2017

@JJMNO1616 That is understandable. Here is the excerpt directly from the federal department of labor page, and the link if that is helpful. Good Luck!!

https://www.dol.gov/whd/regs/compliance/whdfs28.htm

"Employees must comply with their employer’s usual and customary requirements for requesting leave and provide enough information for their employer to reasonably determine whether the FMLA may apply to the leave request. Employees generally must request leave 30 days in advance when the need for leave is foreseeable. When the need for leave is foreseeable less than 30 days in advance or is unforeseeable, employees must provide notice as soon as possible and practicable under the circumstances."

slaven · January 2017

I guess I thankfully don't have a full time job and don't have to worry about qualifying for FMLA. Plus with DH's work hours/training/deployments and not being close to family I'm hoping to be a SAHM.

Back from the drs: No anemia, got a yeast infection again (sorry, tmi), and she wants me to stop taking the BCP. I got a referral to see a Korean obgyn to have an iud put in but they don't have Skyla here which is smaller than Mirena and my old gyno said it has fewer risks of complications for women who haven't had kids. I basically have to either go with Paraguard or Mirena and if/when I get complications they can order Skyla for me. Dr. also has me taking prenatals now which makes me grumpy since we're TTA.

Image: https://us.v-cdn.net/5020794/uploads/editor/3o/gjhvnwgv2s7n.gif

Also this is like the fifth yeast infection I've had in the last 12 months so the dr gave me 5 refills on the RX medicine which is great because A. it's free with my insurance and B. it's just one pill, not a bunch of Monistat. Getting an appointment to check for yeast infections takes like 2 weeks at my clinic so I always end up buying the $20 one day or three day Monistat.

jenotontx · January 2017

@slavenski Why the PNV? I've heard that you should take them for 3 months before TTC but this seems a bit early if you will be TTA until Oct? (TMI warning) I had a really bad yeast infection once because I was miss diagnosed so it went untreated longer then it should have and I was given there capsules to actually insert into my Vagina. Idk if they offer something like that over there but those things worked like a charm. It cleared up almost immediately.

slaven · January 2017

@JJMNO1616 My dr suggested PNV instead of a regular multi because of the iron. While I may not have come up anemic in the blood test, she said it can fluctuate. She also said that for my age group she recommends PNV. The prescription is a pill that I take once orally which is much better than the suppositories or whatever they're called. (eta) I guess thankfully I know the early symptoms so I try to get into the clinic ASAP but if the wait is longer than 2 days I get Monistat OTC. I once tried to be seen and they wanted to give me an apt a week out. The nurse had seen my file after and called me to tell me to go straight to the lab, no dr visit. I ended up having a UTI, yeast infection, and bacteria vaginosis or whatever it's called. Waiting a week with the UTI and BV would have caused it to get so much worse.

JJesco · January 2017

Are you benched or TTA? new here but TTA for a little while longer

What brings you here? Professional licensing tests, friend's wedding, and an indecisive/afraid husband

How long do you think you'll be here? Until April

How have things been going? My husband and I just decided it was time to start TTC (but not until April because that is when my last professional exam is and when my best friend's wedding is). He changes his mind quite often. I can tell he does want to be a dad but he is afraid that everything will change in our lives. I'm excited to start in a few months and it's all I can think about sometimes.

Any R/R/CS? I'm sorry, I don't know what these abbreviations stand for.

GTKY: What are five non-TTC goals for 2017?
1. Pass the last of four professional exams for my profession
2. Get more active and eat healthier
3. Enjoy our remaining time as just husband and wife
4. Pay off some more debt (it would be really awesome to just have the mortgage and student loans left before a baby).
5. Watch less TV and actually go interact with real people, maybe make some new friends

jen83mn · January 2017

Are you benched or TTA? Benched at the moment, then TTA.

What brings you here? Going through an early miscarriage right now.

How long do you think you'll be here? We plan to start TTC again in June.

How have things been going? The past week has been really tough. We found out we were expecting #2 on 12/29, but I started spotting 6 days later and my pregnancy tests weren't getting any darker. I had spotting throughout my son's pregnancy, including implantation spotting early on, so I wasn't too concerned at first but was worried about my pregnancy tests not getting darker like they did the last time. I went in to get my HCG levels tested and they were only 57, still in the normal range for 4 weeks 3 days, but on the lower end. I got my next betas drawn on Friday but don't get results back until tomorrow, but started bleeding heavily last night so I already know the outcome. This has hit me pretty hard emotionally, but now that I've come to accept what's happening, it's been easier than being in denial.

@pumpkin0913 If you need someone to talk to, I'm here for you (feel free to PM me) and would love to talk to someone who is going through something similar.

Any R/R/CS: I've had a lot of questions about going through the loss process as this is my first loss and I didn't really know what to expect, both physically and emotionally, but reading through the forums for similar stories has helped me know better what to expect.

What are 5 non-TTC goals for 2017?

1. Get our household projects done before TTC again. We have so much on our list that needs to get done before another baby comes along, so I'm going to use this time to make it happen. Feeling productive will make the time go by faster and will mean less stress when we start TTC again if it's all done.

2. Lose the last 10-15 lbs to get back to my wedding date weight. With 5 months before we start TTC again, I think this is doable (after I stop stuffing my face with chocolate this week while I cope with this loss).

3. Save some money. Our bank accts have been seriously suffering this year, so we hope to get some more into savings this year and stop spending so much!

4. Go on a mini-vacation. We had planned to go to Florida in May but with Zika a local threat there now in some spots, we decided to cancel our trip. We hope to plan a mini vacation somewhere Zika-free before TTC again.

5. Be thankful and happy for what we have and live in the moment! I'm such a planner, so I feel like I'm always looking ahead to what's going to happen and sometimes miss out on what's happening right now. My goal for this year is to enjoy each day to the fullest and to be thankful for all the blessings we do have.

splashmountain · January 2017

Thanks, and I'm sorry you're going through this @jen83mn I was also pregnant with #2. This whole process has been really hard and one I never thought I'd have to go through, but I'm getting there (DS helps

) I'm here for you as well, if you need someone to talk to, or just vent I'm here.

jen83mn · January 2017

@pumpkin0913

Thank you! I just PM'd you

MTgirlCOworld · January 2017

Ladies I am so sorry for your losses.

@JJesco R/R/CS is Rant Rave Chart Stalk. Hope hubby gets on board soon.

slaven · January 2017

Question: Does anyone think that the Benched/TTA board could be monthly instead of weekly? On one hand I think the post might get lost on the board and be difficult for people to find, especially if they're new to benched/TTA. On the other hand restarting our conversations week to week is tedious however that's coming from a long term TTAer.

On a different note, one of the reasons we're TTA is financial. I really want to be a SAHM because DH is active duty and we move so much that I don't think I could let someone that I don't know watch our baby. We're moving this spring so it'll be a whole new set of faces. We have my car payment (Ford Focus so it's not a lot), student loans, and DH was wanting a brand new Jeep when we move back to the States. It was the $400+ a month Jeep payment that threw our budget out the window. Well today DH just randomly said that he thought of just paying for a car outright so that he doesn't have to have a payment, I didn't even bring up the topic.

I would never tell him that he couldn't buy the car he wanted but with me no longer on birth control I think he's aware of the risk relying on pulling out causes. Maybe we're in NTNP territory now but I'm in no way temping or OPKing or anything. He was really excited when we were TTC but having over $100k combined in student debt sucks.

splashmountain · January 2017

@slavenski I'm still new, but ttcal just does a monthly one. It doesn't have all the questions that this one has and it seems like we can just bring it back up whenever we feel the need. I agree that it would get lost (this board is a lot more active in that it has more daily posts than ttcal) but I'm fine with whatever.

Eta spelling

JNCPro3130 · January 2017

I'm new here, but will be TTA for awhile. I'd like to keep this thread, but I'm good with whatever.

Are you benched or TTA? TTA

What brings you here? I'm currently TTA until the summer. *TW child mentioned* With DS, I planned (with the help of this board and tracking) to have my son so I could have a long maternity leave. I had him in March 2015 and then didn't go back full time until August of that year. I hope to do that again. *End TW*

How long do you think you'll be here? We will probably TTC beginning in June.

How have things been going? I JUST started thinking about having a baby, so it's going fine for me. I have a lot going on over the next few month. I'm in a wedding at the beginning of March, I'm trying to get in shape, and being a teacher is super busy. I think I have plenty to keep me distracted.

Any R/R/CS? I'm trying to lose weight. I've been doing good for a week now... Why am I not model skinny yet?! Also, it's cold. How am I supposed to WANT to workout when the couch with a blanket and a bag of cookies sounds so much better?

GTKY: What are five non-TTC goals for 2017?
1. Lose 10-15 pounds - I'm kidding, of course, in my rant. I'm at my heaviest weight and I am struggling with body image, which makes wanting to BD with DH a struggle at times.

2. Exercise 3-5 days a week

3. Get more organized at work

4. Get a good cleaning routine at home so I don't have to spend 2-3 hours of my weekend cleaning

5. Read more - I love to read, but it gets put to the side a lot.

izza2 · January 2017

@slavenski - I'm so busy with school and work that at this point, it's up to you guys. I'm lucky if I get online once every few days lately, let alone thinking of starting the check-ins from here on out.
If it goes monthly, I don't care. If it stays weekly, I don't care.
I've been posting here almost every week for 14-ish months, and yes, it gets tedious, but for those that are benched, they're only here for a month or two. That's one or two check-ins while they're benched, versus having a spot to go to every week so they can still feel connected to the TTGP board while they may not feel comfortable/mentally okay to go in to WTO/TWW.

I get that the thread can be brought back at any point, but, that's how it's been since it was started and aside from once or twice, it doesn't happen. It either gets lost, people forget it exists, or people come on to the board and don't realize that there's a Benched/TTA thread because it's not there.

If it's a matter of not wanting to repeat things, I have weeks where I'll just do the basics and not spell things out. The form is just a guideline, not a requirement. If you want to say why you're TTA/Benched every time you check-in, then do so, but if not, then feel free to skip.

jenotontx · January 2017

@slavenski Do you and your DH qualify for income based repayment on any of your student loans? If so, I think your payment would significantly decrease because you wouldn't have both incomes.

slaven · January 2017

@JJMNO1616 We're going to look into consolidation/income based repayment when we do our taxes in a few weeks. I've been waiting because my loans are in deferment while I finish my MBA and I have to wait till my MBA is done to include my MBA loans. Come March I'll have to start making those payments though.

ChloandCoco · January 2017

Hi ladies! First time posting in this thread and I hope we can keep it going. I'm not ready to join the TWW/WTO thread, but would like to participate in some way to the TTC board.

Are you benched or TTA? TTA

What brings you here? I've got BOTB and I need an outlet to get me through the next few months.

How long do you think you'll be here? Until mid-April, depending on when my cycle starts that month.

How have things been going? I'm doing a lot better than I was a few weeks ago. We were originally going to start TTC in February, but with vacations and weddings this year it makes more sense to put it off a few more months. We booked our flights for our family vacation in May, so planning that will distract me.

Any R/R/CS? Nothing at the moment.

GTKY: What are five non-TTC goals for 2017?

1 - Start working out
2 - Find a new hobby
3 - Pack a lunch for work everyday
4 - Go on more dates with my husband
5 - Spend time enjoying the little moments in life

jenotontx · January 2017

@ChloandCoco Welcome! I am TTA until April as well and also have serious BOTB. FX the next 3 months go by quickly or those "little moments" at least make it enjoyable while we wait.

NYTino24 · January 2017

I can keep the thread going weekly for as long as I'm benched. People can jump in as they want. What day is it normally posted? Mondays if I remember correctly?

ChloandCoco · January 2017

@JJMNO1616 It will be nice to have a TTA buddy until April

jenotontx · January 2017

@NYTino24 Noooo

I haven't checked in on the other thread you posted recently. I'm so sorry you are here. Creepy internet hugs.

ETA- sorry if my comment is weird as I just realized you probably don't know me on here. I lurked a lot when you were previously active on TTGP. So I have been following for awhile.

izza2 · January 2017

@NYTino24 - I'm incredibly sorry that you find yourself joining the thread/back to TTGP. Sending so many hugs your way right now.
Yes, the thread is supposed to be started on Mondays, but at this point, it can be started whatever day of the week works best for you/everyone.

MTgirlCOworld · January 2017

@NYTino24 so sorry you are back. Internet hugs!

Are you benched or TTA? TTA

What brings you here? Lost my job

How long do you think you'll be here? Mid Feb at the earliest.

How have things been going? I have been trying to drop some pounds before we start but my lack of patience I may not. I got laid off in November and I have been trying to find a new job. DH and I agreed that if I don't have any solid leads by mid Feb then we can start trying. If I get KTFU then I will keep looking and try to just negotiate leave or do temp jobs. Also weight stuff. Mainly me trying to lose the weight stuff.

Any R/R/CS? The damn I'm OK, I'm not OK, I'm OK, I want to start trying now, cycle is driving me (and DH) BSC.

GTKY: What are five non-TTC goals for 2017?
1. Lose weight (increase lean mass while losing fat)
2. Find a job.
3. Do some updates around the house.
4. Get better with my diet/workout plan.
5. Try new things

ETA to add check in.

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