December check-in

KLake42 · November 2016

Hi y'all! I know it's not quite December yet, and I hope I'm not stepping on any toes, but I didn't see a November check-in, and I want to dip my toes back in these waters, so I'm gonna go ahead and post this.

Tell us:

your first name (or your screen name, if you prefer)

where you're from

TTC#?

how many months/cycles you've been TTC

where you are at in your cycle

how you feel, plans, rants, anything cycle/TTC related.

GTKY question: What is your favorite kind of pie? (If you don't bake pies, but have some other favorite holiday dessert that you like to eat or make, what is it?)

KLake42 · November 2016

And I'll go first!

Kathleen, from Georgia

TTC #1

I had a ton of IUIs, and two IVF attempts that were cancelled for poor response. I'm getting ready to start reciprocal IVF, using my wife's eggs and my uterus, starting at the end of December!

Terrified and excited! Well rested. I think I've mostly reconciled myself to the fact that my ovaries are busted, and I'm just happy to be able to start taking some steps again. We are using a known sperm donor this time (my brother), so we have a shot at bringing a child into the world who looks like both of us, and with a known sperm donor, there won't be that mystery or loss of family history that comes from anonymous donors. (Kid, your uncle wanted us to be able to have a family, so he gave you some DNA. He's not your dad, but he will give you ridiculous gifts and junk food, and he loves you to pieces.) I'm worried that my wife might have a hard time with the injections and regular vagina-wand ultrasounds.

Pumpkin pie! I make a homemade crust, and I use lard, because I want it to be delicious and terribly unhealthy.

Nice to see you guys again! I've been gone for a bit (taking a break while we waited out the sperm quarantine) but ready to jump back in.

thistle8677 · November 2016

@KLake42!!!! Oh my goodness! I'm so excited for you, what AWESOME news!!! Welcome back! I haven't officially come back yet, but now that you're here I'll post

thistle8677 · November 2016

thistle8677 in Oregon

TTC#5 (#1 for fiancé) for 29mo.
History of recurrent loss, male factor
1 failed IUI, RE and male fertility urologist strongly suggest IVF w/ICSI and genetic testing.****

***Luckily we do have fertility coverage with our insurance, however my fiancé has a rare autoimmune brain disease including other health issues with not producing enough testosterone (hypothalamus/pituitary axis related) so we've spent a lot of this past year focusing on his health.
Part of the reason I don't post these days is because there's so much medical explanation and it gets very redundant. My man has undergone 11 infusions (5 solu-medrol; 6 IVIG) over the past 6mo and is just now finally returning to work. So it's safe to say this has been probably one of the hardest years of my life and certainly the most demanding.
We are not done with our research, but will continue his treatments and drs appts. I do believe we are currently on more stable ground keeping on top of the IVIG treatment plan.

So.....for now we have been TTC on our own, in the hopes that we will have success. Over the next few months, if we need to, we will move forward with pursuing IVF.

Today is 1dpo and we were able to get a high timing score on FF! Typically we only get to bd once in the window, but this cycle 3 times!
That alone makes me very happy. It's kind of a big deal for us!
I will admit that on the third time I broke down mid-way and had a cry. I think it was a mixture of relief and of resignation.

I am a huge fan of pumpkin pie. I didn't make my own this year, but yours sounds awesome @KLake42

Thank you all for hanging in and reading my follow up. I look forward to getting acquainted with anyone I haven't "met" yet!

justsuzie · November 2016

@KLake42 Good luck with the IVF. That is great that your future child will have so many people that love him or her!

@thistle8677 I hope the natural route works for you.

AFM...
***Loss Mentioned TW***

Suzie from CT, almost 37. I was late to the babymaking game. I just go married this past June.

We are ttc #1 We Are recovering from an ectopic pregnancy in September. The loss was at 6 weeks. I had 6 shots of methotrexate and am currently waiting for my levels to get to 0. Then I need to rebuild my folic acid levels.

This is our 6th month ttc but we are benched until February because of the ectopic.

Love pumpkin pie but we are vegan. I haven't been able to find any delicious vegan versions.

vlagrl29 · November 2016

vlagrl from Missouri

TTC #2 Cycle 6 in TWW

I recently decided to forget all that opk temping charting stuff because it was causing me stress. I'm glad I did because BD was so much better and I think we really had decent timing with a least a few times a week. I tend to obsess about stuff that I can't control so I was in a much better mind frame this cycle.

I'm expecting pre AF spotting to start towards the end of this week and decided in December to go ahead and do the CD3 and CD21 blood work for me. Going to call OB tomorrow and check on a couple of those tests codes to make sure I have it right and once I start spotting I will buy them from my Chiro and once CD 1 starts I will make an appt for blood work. I know I'm already counting myself out for this cycle but I'm feeling really normal and not pregnant at the moment.

So I will have to track my Dec cycle but after that I'm not going to anymore.

My fav pie is apple!

thistle8677 · November 2016

I'm so very sorry for your loss @justsuzie

Thinking of you and I'm happy you're here.

thistle8677 · November 2016

Fingers crossed for you @vlagrl29!

Momifbysea · November 2016

Hey @KLake42 so good to see you back in here! You too @thistle8677!

Momifbysea in Iowa

TTC #2 since Nov 2015

We started the fertility doctor process a couple of months ago but so far have just done all the testing for me - bloodwork, ultrasound, HSG. I've been hoping that in the midst of the testing that we'd get KU along the way. We will see if we proceed with IUI in the new year or keep going at it naturally. It's a chronic stress so am not sure how many procedures we are up for. My husband should have less stress and a better schedule starting in January so that should help.

This cycle we had norovirus and my husband is still also battling a bronchial infection, so I didn't even test with OPK. CM looked good last night but he couldn't which totally sent me into a terrible mood but at 5am this morning he changed his mind, so we may just have a slight shot this month who knows?

As for pie, im a chocolate lover so bring me a French silk. Or any kind of non-fruit flavored ice cream!

vlagrl29 · November 2016

sorry about being sick @Momifbysea I totally understand the stress of TTC and FW not being in the best window for you. That's why I'm over it lol. I didn't realized you had been trying a year - I just thought it was 6 ish months.

Momifbysea · November 2016

@vlagrl29 I like your attitude, think we will just go with the flow the next couple months.

vlagrl29 · November 2016

you have to focus on what you have and not what you don't have. I've told myself I have everything I've ever wanted in life and anything extra at this point is icing on top of the cake. I'm not as BSC. It doesn't do me any good thinking - will saliva kill the sperm, I've got a positive OPK we have to have sex now or I will have a meltdown, Should I lay down after we have sex for 30 minutes, did I wait too long to have a 2nd kid, is his sperm low, are my eggs dead, etc. None of this helps me feel better. There are tons of people our age getting pregnant. I don't want to have to have this stress right now when it's only been 6 months. I'm prepared to do it at 12 months. I've thought maybe we are meant to have an only kid and at least we have that. I do want to get medical help when its necessary and if that doesn't work I would want to look into adoption.

So for now I'm focusing on things that matter now - our family, my business, yoga and things on my to do list I haven't checked off yet. I'm just hoping I don't seem negative to DH. We were talking about health insurance for 2017 and we have a really good plan picked although its a significant raise. If we do deliver next year it will only cost us $1100. I told him I like to be prepared but none of this may not matter if we don't get pregnant by April to have a december baby. I'm not stressing about that either.

To be honest I'm really enjoying DD in Kindergarten now because I have all this extra time during the day now to get tons done that I haven't had in 5 years.

PoeMasque · November 2016

@KLake42 !!! Thank you for picking up the torch! and @thistle8677 yay! Glad to see you ladies back here

Jen from Oregon

TTC#1 since Nov 2015 (15 cycles now)

we still have THREE weeks till our RE appointment to start IVF. Ugh.

CD11 and I've stopped doing OPKs or even really tracking anything. Just waiting for the RE.

This is not a fair question....all pies. Can that be my answer?

vlagrl29 · November 2016

@PoeMasque - that's good you are getting progress and soon will start IVF. I know someone that did their first IVF recently and had success and is now pregnant. If you don't mind my asking how much does all that cost. We have no fertility coverage so if we do end up down that road at the year mark in May it will be out of pocket for us.

PoeMasque · December 2016

@vlagrl29 its $550 for the consult, $9800 package for all US, surgeries (retrieval and transfer), and embryologist fees. ~$3000 for meds. Any testing before is not included in that, but our insurance pays 50% for testing to "determine infertility", so hopefully the pre-IVF bloodwork is covered under that

i am putting $2k into a health savings account so that most of the meds are covered with pre-tax money. I know people who took out loans because their first IVF cycle didn't work and they needed two or three to get pg. so hoping that's not us.

vlagrl29 · December 2016

@PoeMasque wow that is expensive. I can see why people take a loan out for it. It would totally deplete our emergency fund and then some. I hope you don't need more than 1 cycle either. I'm sure it feels good though for you to have a plan of action now so I wish you the best on this part of the journey.

thistle8677 · December 2016

I'm so sorry you are recovering for norovirus @Momifbysea

thistle8677 · December 2016

@PoeMasque I'm very excited for you to be moving forward with IVF soon. It's so expensive...we've been quoted 22,000- with ICSI, genetic testing and meds.
That was a fertility clinic in Seattle. The only reason we are considering going there is because they will bill our insurance directly and we can make monthly payments on the remainder of what we owe afterward.
I love ORM here in Portland, but they require we pay upfront, and be reimbursed by our insurance afterward.
We don't have the means to do this.

vlagrl29 · December 2016

omg @thistle8677 that is so much money! How much if you don't need IVF like if you just need the clomid or IUI? We have no fertility coverage so it would all be on us. Probably would have to take out a home equity line of credit. I told DH this morning we would have to decide between IF treatments or adoption if it gets to that point.

KLake42 · December 2016

I took out a big loan as well. Since the two IVF tries were both cancelled, I got to keep most of the money I paid the clinic as a credit to the next try (I just paid for the monitoring, blood work, and IUIs, since we converted both to IUIs that didn't work).

If I add up everything we've already spent on fertility, it comes to about $60k. But I was able to claim most of it as a tax deduction, and it boosted by IRS refund by $13k, so at least there's that. That includes all the IUIs, cancelled IVFs, and acupuncture. No insurance.

thistle8677 · December 2016

@vlagrl29 we've suffered multiple losses and had one failed IUI a few months ago. My fiancé has male factor issues with his low testosterone and has to give himself HCG injections 3 times a week. All of our fertility testing came out normal aside from my man's SA with lower numbers and lower motility. Hopefully that's improved somewhat, but we are still best suited for IVF with all the bells and whistles.
We aren't eligible for a loan at this time due to our compromised credit, so having the insurance is nothing short of a blessing.

thistle8677 · December 2016

And holy hell @KLake42.
It blows my mind the lengths some of us have to go through. I've got everything crossed for you! Xoxo

PoeMasque · December 2016

@thistle8677 our clinic in Eugene does monthly payments and works with insurance, we also have a guest room if you need a place to crash during treatment

thistle8677 · December 2016

Aww @PoeMasque

I will email you to get more info about your clinic.
I'd have to get it approved through my insurance, but I am absolutely curious about their cost and billing.

vlagrl29 · December 2016

@thistle8677 I'm so sorry about all your losses - sounds like you guys have been thru so much. What does your DH take for his sperm? If we did have insurance coverage with fertility I would like to get the HSG test and DH's SA but thats all too much money for us right now and we will re asses once we get to the year mark which hopefully we don't fingers crossed.

thistle8677 · December 2016

@vlagrl29 he has a condition called hypogonadotropic hypogonadism, so the HCG injections are to help stimulate his brain to produce testosterone. There are a list of supplements the RE recommends, but so far he only takes zinc, coq10, 325 mg iron (his levels are currently servely low; we are moving on to iron infusion therapy)and vitamin D (he has a deficiency, which is actually common here in the Pacific Northwest.)
I will find the list of supplements with their recommended doses, if you are interested.
Please know that I am not a dr., so again I can't say if this would be the same recommendations for your husband or not.
I'll go look for that info now

thistle8677 · December 2016

*****severely not servely

I use my phone when posting responses, so autocorrect often interferes!

vlagrl29 · December 2016

Yeah I've heard of coq10. Thought about giving it to dh but honestly we haven't had any of those tests done to know if it's needed. His sperm may be fine.

vlagrl29 · December 2016

for those of you that did have a semen analysis done on DH how much did they charge if you remember? I think I will look into the cost this next week. I woke up today worrying about everything. Something about 6 months is bothering me .

PoeMasque · December 2016

@vlagrl29 our sperm wash/semen analysis was $64, so I assume a semen analysis alone would be less

vlagrl29 · December 2016

that's amazing @PoeMasque - I had assumed it would have been more money. I will call about it tomorrow. Going to call my OB to see if she heard back from Blue Cross about submitting my pre determination for fertility tests to see if it would be covered first. If not I will call the clinic and ask them their price. I'm assuming the HSG is super expensive OOP so I can wait on that one.

thistle8677 · December 2016

@vlagrl29 you can also go directly through a urologist if it's a concern...and by doing so bypass a fertility clinic all together. Some drs will do a work up without going straight to an RE. This includes your OB.

vlagrl29 · December 2016

@thistle8677 my OBs nurse said there is only 1 place in town that does SA which I find truly odd. we live in a bigger city. I just want to get some basic stuff tested with me and DH - never had this issue taking longer to get pregnant with DD but that was 6 years ago.

thistle8677 · December 2016

@vlagrl29 that does sound odd. Hmm. Might be worth calling you husband's dr about that. Urology absolutely does SA.

vlagrl29 · December 2016

why have a urologist do it @thistle8677 - is the price about the same. I will do some calling today.

kiwieloping · December 2016

Hi ladies. I did a little intro in one other thread (new but not really new) but thought I would jump in here as well.

Tell us:

your first name (or your screen name, if you prefer): my sn is super long because it was my "the knot" name but we are keeping TTC to ourselves so I don't want to share my fn just yet

where you're from - Ontario, Canada - great white north!

TTC#

how many months/cycles you've been TTC - this is our twelfth month and fifteenth cycle technically though there were a few cycles when we were more NTNP.

where you are at in your cycle - WTO

how you feel, plans, rants, anything cycle/TTC related. - the last couple of months have actually been much easier then when I was like 4 or 5 months into TTC. I'm more relaxed now and have an overall better outlook. Each BFN or AF arrival hasn't been as hard. We have had some initial medical tests (hormone levels, ultrasound, SA, etc) and things are all within the normal range. We decided that we will book with a fertility clinic in March if we are still not KU - the closest one is 300 km from us because we live in the north.

Side note / rant, after reading all of the posts about costs/insurance etc. I am really grateful to be in Canada. Most medical stuff is covered by our universal healthcare or by my supplementary healthcare plan. I can't imagine having the extra stress of figuring out how to pay for delivery, medication, fertility visits, etc. So extra hugs to all you gals dealing with that on top of all the other stresses!!

GTKY question: What is your favorite kind of pie? (If you don't bake pies, but have some other favorite holiday dessert that you like to eat or make, what is it?) I agree with some PPs who said all pie (except I don't like apple pie - I know its weird) but I especially love sugar pie. It's a French Canadian pie which is basically pecan pie without nuts and has maple sugar and brown sugar. Delicious!

vlagrl29 · December 2016

@kiwielopingbride it can be stressful. They told me CD3 blood work would be 1k if insurance didn't cover it so I was elated when my chiro sold me the blood work for $193 because it didn't go thru insurance. SA will only be $90 so we can handle that. HSG got covered by my surprise so cost will be minimal. I"m so shocked that this is all happening so fast. I was depressed at first but now I'm just so happy to get it all over with and have some answers - maybe nothing is wrong but I at least want to know that so I stop agonizing every month AF comes. A previous poster mentioned IUI isn't that expensive so if we have to do that we will but IVF is way out of our budget. I just have a hard time yet believing I will need IUI or IVF because I was able to conceive 6 years ago. I'm hoping its something easier like low progesterone.

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