Hello, let me introduce myself first..
For the first 30 years of my life, everything was smooth and worry-free. I was my parents’ most beloved child, found my true love in college, and happily married him after graduation.
At work, I was my boss’s most valued employee. Whenever I was in charge of a project, colleagues would inevitably say, “Oh, then I’m totally at ease.” I was constantly named “Employee of the Year,” with generous bonuses every year.
Later, I started my own business. Within just three months, I had broken into the market and started making money. By the fifth month, I was earning twice my previous salary. Growth was steady month after month. Right when the business needed more hands, I serendipitously met an amazing partner, and the company reached a whole new level.
Really, it seemed like at every step, whatever I needed, a pair of hands would always place it right in front of me, just in time.
My Two Girls: Ellie & Mia
Meet Ellie, My Firstborn
In 2020, my husband and I decided to have a child. After trying for over a year, we finally got the news in 2021 that a little one was on the way. In 2022, we welcomed our first child, Ellie. She made me a mother.
She is utterly adorable—big eyes, rosy skin, chubby little hands. Every time I look at her, I can’t help but give her a kiss. She is pure joy, and I love her more each day.
But as a first-time mom, I faced unprecedented difficulties. The postpartum tearing wouldn’t heal, and the pain was excruciating. Clogged milk ducts made my breasts hard as rocks. The severe sleep deprivation… And what was even more crushing was that, with zero parenting experience, I was clueless when faced with her unexplained wailing, night terrors, refusal to nurse, constipation, diarrhea, fevers… I desperately searched online, longing for one accurate, truly useful answer!
It was during this time that I thought, once I make it through this “dark” path, I must leave a light on for other new moms.
And Then Came Mia
Ellie had just turned one when I got pregnant again. In 2024, we welcomed our second daughter, Mia.
Completely different from Ellie, Mia is a great eater and sleeper. Although she had her fussy moments in the first two months, starting almost from month three, she became super easygoing. She feeds on schedule, gradually sleeps through the night, loves her solid foods, and adapted quickly when I had to stop breastfeeding due to mastitis.
This made me realize just how vastly different babies can be! It made me even more determined to write about my experiences.
Why I Had to Start This Blog
The Catalyst: A Life Pivoted
After Mia was born, my business also began to decline sharply. I had no choice but to close it and become a full-time mom. My work no longer involves Excel and Word, but instead revolves around changing diapers, washing bottles, making baby food, and managing household chores…
This has been a monumental challenge for me. All my past achievements seem irrelevant now. Managing two young children has brought me a sense of frustration I’ve never known before.
The Daily Reality
They are always fighting over things. When one is in my arms, the other immediately demands to be held too. When I try to cook, Ellie wants me to read her a book. When I attempt to load the washing machine, Mia has a diaper blowout, and I must drop everything to change her…
By the time I finish all that, I see the cup of hot coffee on the table has gone cold again. And it’s not until evening that I remember, “Oh my goodness, the clothes are still in the hamper, unwashed!”
Of course, being a mom is filled with happiness, but that doesn’t negate how hard it is.
My Promise to You
Because I’ve walked this path myself, I won’t just tell you how joyful motherhood is, like many websites do. I want to share my real, unfiltered experiences so every new mom can find a “companion” here.
I want to tell you: you are not alone. What you’re going through, I’ve been there too. Your breakdowns, your helplessness, your moments of losing control—I’ve had them all. You don’t need to feel guilty. This is just a small, necessary stretch of the journey for every mom.
My Hope for This Space
I really want to share my parenting experiences—not just the warm, glowing moments, but to honestly document the pitfalls I’ve stumbled into, the tears I’ve shed, and the “survival wisdom” I’ve scraped together in utter exhaustion.
The Goal: A Mom’s Toolkit
I hope this blog becomes a “mom’s toolkit,” filled not with vague theories, but with:
- Practical Tips: Like how to quickly figure out why a baby is crying, tried-and-true methods for dealing with clogged ducts, or how to efficiently manage the daily grind with twins (or two under two) solo.
- Pitfall Avoidance Guides: Sharing the baby products I regret buying the most, and those “game-changer” parenting hacks. Letting you know which parenting anxieties you can let go of, and which principles are worth holding onto.
- A Community for Moms: I hope my stories connect me with more moms like you. We can cheer each other on in the comments, share our own tricks, turning the storms we face alone into a journey we walk together.
The Bigger Vision
My previous career taught me to analyze data, solve problems, and optimize processes. Now, I’m applying all those skills to this new “position” of Mom. I want to prove that a mom’s value is absolutely not confined to the home. The mindset, resilience, and creativity we built in our careers can shine just as brightly—perhaps even brighter—in this more complex, long-term “project” of raising humans, and can even be transformed into a force that helps others.
My hope is simple: that every mom who opens this blog can let out a sigh of relief and say, “So it’s not just me.” Then, she can find a bit of practical info, a dose of comforting solidarity, and return to her sweet, chaotic mom-life with a little more confidence and a little less weight on her shoulders.
This road? Let’s walk it together.
canavara
member
Re: Sunday Ticker Change (11/20)
What are you doing this week to prepare for LO's arrival? Not a whole lot. We have our final lamaze class Tuesday. We put some finishing touches on his nursery this week and made sure the furniture (bookcase and dresser) were mounted to the walls. It's looking really gorgeous right now, a very happy peaceful blend of blue and orange.
Rants / Raves / Questions / Symptoms: A lot of discomfort suddenly from getting dramatically bigger in the past week. Lightning crotch. Strangers are suddenly asking me, without hesitation or second-guessing themselves, when I'm due.
When's your next appointment? The 2nd for my last 2-week check-in at 35 weeks and then switching over to 1-weeks from then on. I don't know if it's just that my pregnancy is very low-risk or what but my OB is very hands off and low-key about these appointments. No growth scans, nothing. It's just been measuring fundal height and checking fetal heart rate at each one. She basically described everything as being in "cruise control mode."
GTKY: What is your favorite way to exercise while pregnant? Not pregnant? Swimming for sure and body weight squats. While not pregnant, Crossfit, olympic weightlifting, and biking.
30wks, I can definitely tell she's got more of an awake and asleep pattern now a days.she sits so much lower then my other 2 girls did that I feel her in different places.
What are you doing this week to prepare for LO's arrival?
Nothing much, I think we are pretty ready for this little one to get here. The only big thing let to do is put the carseats into the vehicles.
Rants / Raves / Questions / Symptoms:
Tired a lot and winded from everthing. I try not to move too quickly or I cause BH.
When's your next appointment?
Dec 6th for a reg check-up.
GTKY: What is your favorite way to exercise while pregnant? Not pregnant?
I'm not big on exercise pregnant or not, but I will go for walks with my co-workers and my kids. I don't mind swimming either.
Nonstop nesting! We are finally home and there is SO much cleaning and putting things away and all of that. Spent all of Saturday and most of today organizing and cleaning. Renovation is probably 95% done and everything is awesome. Baby's room should be finished by Thanksgiving!! We're really just decorating and organizing at this point.
Rave: almost every item I need has been purchased off my registry which is such a relief (minus a few cloth diapers, but I have gift cards). Rant: I've had so many GI issues this whole pregnancy and they cause such sharp pains/feels like I'm being stabbed from the inside. Going to talk to the OB about this (again). Just always worries me something is wrong and then I go to the bathroom and they disappear (sorry, TMI). I have been the opposite of constipated this entire pregnancy, so I can't complain about that, but sharp pains are always worrying.
This Tuesday for 34 week appt.
While pregnant, definitely super long dog walks. I do this not pregnant, but not as my only "cardio", and I feel like it's been a nice change of pace to stop and smell the roses and enjoy the seasons. I biked daily until just before the third tri and that was nice, too. When not pregnant, running for sure. I really miss running, feeling strong and fast. Excited to take LO running in his jogging stroller.
34 weeks. @canavara :: I'm right there with you on the growth spurt. Good grief. The other day, it felt like I had an octopus in there -- he is jam-packed in there and everywhere.
What are you doing this week to prepare for LO's arrival?
Trying to survive my in-laws being in town. Sterilizing breast pump parts. Getting things for my hospital bag.
Rants / Raves / Questions / Symptoms:
Rant: I have decided, prior to anyone's arrival, that I'm never again hosting Thanksgiving for my husband's family. This "never" bit is false, given the fact that we've only been married for a little over a year and haven't yet had our first baby, but it's my wish. Dealing with 6 different food restrictions and not being able to drink whike menu planning and preparing (not to mention while they are all here) is just plain unacceptable. My mom is the only person from my side coming (my sister and her family live in Ohio and aren't able to make the trip); fortunately, the only thing I have to worry about for her is making sure we have enough Chardonnay in the house. Happy Thanksgiving!
Symptoms: so much lightening crotch. Lots of BH.
When's your next appointment?
December 1. Then I'm onto weekly appointments. Crazy how fast the third trimester is going. The OBs and midwives where I go are also fairly hands off. They did a quick pelvic exam last week because the night before my appointment, I was a little concerned I might be leaking amniotic fluid. (I'm not.) Of course, so far, all of my appointments have been with women and my next one is with the one male OB (he also has the best reputation in town) and he'll do the Group Strep B test. So, that'll be a fun introduction. (I'm meeting with everyone at least once, because the delivery will be with whomever is on call.)
GTKY: What is your favorite way to exercise while pregnant? Not pregnant?
Pregnant: swimming, light hikes, yoga, barre, exercise videos, tennis up until month 6 or so. Not pregnant: all of the above, but more strenuous, especially the hiking/backpacking. I'm hopeful to get some good snowshoeing in this winter after the 6 week recovery, and some spring cross country skiing.
33 Weeks!
What are you doing this week to prepare for LO's arrival?
We did so much this weekend. Car seats have been installed in both cars, the nursery is almost complete- I just need to get some more art work. Nesting is hitting hard and needing to re-organize a lot in order to find homes for some of the baby gear.
Rants / Raves / Questions / Symptoms:
Nothing this week. Getting anxious about how big she is- we had our growth scan on Monday and she is 55 percentile and was about 4.5lbs last week. I am reading those in the 34th week talking about a growth spurt and wondering how she will fit if she grows anymore this week. I'm already feeling her move every where all at once.
When's your next appointment?
November 30th
GTKY: What is your favorite way to exercise while pregnant? Not pregnant?
Pre- pregnancy I liked taking barre classes when my schedule permitted. During pregnancy I mostly did walking as my exercise, but for about 10 weeks I have started braxton hicks contractions when I am walking to and from the subway or even just running errands. I lived in NYC for over a decade, and walking at the slow speed my body is requiring right now is painful. Looking forward to being able to walk at a normal speed again- maybe even running again (though I find running boring).
BFP#4- 9/26 edd 6/5/18
33 weeks!!
What are you doing this week to prepare for LO's arrival?
Getting clothes hung and closet finished.
Rants / Raves / Questions / Symptoms:
Looking up timing of braxton hicks.
When's your next appointment?
Monday- OB and Saturday- us
GTKY: What is your favorite way to exercise while pregnant? Not pregnant?
Walking and not pregnant- dads
H and I are attending birth preparation classes all this coming weekend, and I just went for the second time to the chiropractor. She's really happy with the progress with my back and she'll be giving me some pelvic floor exercises at our next appointment.
Rant: I've been really polite and patient with a vendor who can't seem to do basic math invoicing my organisation, but I'm not sure that will last much longer. At this point I've sent back the signed agreement with the correct rates, and then did all of the tiny calculations for them, and they still insist on charging me the incorrect amount. I've had 2 other people double check that my calculations aren't being subjected to pregnancy brain, and I'm definitely mathing correctly. So the pregnancy rage is about to be released.
Next appointment on December 2nd
I don't do much specific exercising while pregnant besides some stretches at home, but being in a city I do a lot of walking everyday. Pre-pregnancy, I was a huge fan of kickboxing. I'm hoping to get back into when I move back to the US next year.
Car seats are getting installed this week for inspection Friday or Monday. Otherwise just cleaning and finishing odds and ends laundry and maybe getting the art on the walls in the nursery?
I'm so uncomfortable. Like, in tears some nights because A's head is in my ribs and it burns and my whole crotch/ inner thighs hurt so much
I'm sitting at my NST right now, babies weren't cooperating a minute ago but they seem to have chilled out a bit. BPP earlier went great, both are practice breathing and both had the hiccups! Next NST on Friday.
Exercise while pregnant- lol! I got out of the habit of doing anything really while I was so sick for so long, but yoga/ stretching and walking is about all I can handle. Not pregnant- I CANT WAIT to run again! And do a hard yoga flow. And just SWEAT from something other than trying to get out of bed or taking a shower
BFP#4- 9/26 edd 6/5/18
Baby is 34 weeks! Feeling more wiggling going on and DH actually caught a glimpse of my belly moving! He was reading this political argument he had with a family member (for the 3rd time) and I guess Baby was really into it 'cos my belly stopped moving when DH finally noticed and got real quiet to watch. MW said she thinks Baby has flipped to head down position, but not 100%. Next check up, if she can't tell, we're going to do an US to be sure.
Baby shower was yesterday, so now that we know what we need (basically: everything on our registry), I'm making shopping lists to take advantage of Black Friday and Cyber Monday sales. Hopefully, DH will set up the crib this week, once he finds where he (mis)placed the screws...
Rave/Rant: I'm so happy the shower is done with. It has been such a huge stress the past week and half and it didn't stop until we were finally home and in bed. I still had some leftover stress this morning when getting ready for work until my mom (who gives me rides to work since we work together) made me stop and drink my hot chocolate lol. Nothing beats a warm cup of hot chocolate (except for possibly a hard hot chocolate
)
Next appointment is next Wednesday. Check up and testing for GBS. We'll be going every week after next week. Things are speeding up!
Exercise: My first thought was, what is that? It's been so hard to do anything while pregnant because I was so sick first tri and then easily wiped out second and third. But yesterday, at church, the children did a dance to a really upbeat song and the congregation were encourage to dance along. My god kids were right in front of where we were, so I was dancing and jumping with them as support and encouragement. After the song finished, I looked at DH and we were both astonished that I was still standing. Now I'm pumped to try to go to the gym tonight and get some leg work outs in! Before pregnancy, I was doing the elliptical every night with a few weights here and there. Can't wait to establish a new routine with Baby.
Me: 33 DH: 38 Married: 1/10/15
1st Pregnancy EDD: 1/1/17 Born 1/10/17 Team Green turned Blue!
2nd Pregnancy EDD: 11/6/18 Born 11/09/18 Baby Boy!
3rd Pregnancy EDD: 12/?/21
Children are like casseroles; it takes a lot to mess them up.
What are you doing this week to prepare for LO's arrival? Not a whole lot. I have a bad cold almost like the flu. We still have a lot of cleaning to do and need to buy more stuff. Hopefully this week we can order some stuff.
Rants / Raves / Questions / Symptoms: A lot of discomfort.
When's your next appointment? The next one is next Wednesday. I already see the doctor every two weeks.
GTKY: What is your favorite way to exercise while pregnant? Not pregnant? I like to walk and do squats pregnant or not pregnant.