Monday BF 10/24

cgss11 · October 2016

Starting the thread because I just need to bitch. Right now.

Our dog got very bad over the weekend. Woke up Saturday morning and couldn't walk. Sometimes she can get herself up, most of the time she can't. Hasn't eaten since Friday am. Vet felt like it's likely a herniated disk, although X-ray couldn't confirm. Got steroids and muscle relaxers to try but said if there's no improvement in a few days it's likely time. We can check with a neurologist but it's out of our price range and she's too old for surgery anyways.

Ok, so we're mentally preparing for the worst, while doing 24/7 care for her. She's 150 pounds, so it's a two person task to get her up and outside (she will pee), or to move anywhere.

We kind of determined Tuesday as timeline for a progress check on the medicine. Now it's today and DH is telling me he found a dog chiropractor who may be able to help. But it's 8 sessions. I'm due in 7 weeks. I totally understand he wants to try anything (it's his baby, he got her at 8 weeks old..I've been around 4 years of her 8) but I'm terrified that 1. Something will happen with the dog sitter while I'm at the hospital or 2. Something shortly after happens and what is supposed to be the happiest time, turns very, very bad. DH is devastated over this, crying..laying in the crate with her, etc. So I have to be the bad guy and tell him what I think needs done. He felt that way also until the chiropractor was found. It's ultimately up to him, but ugh, this is hard.

LinziLoo09 · October 2016

Geez I'm so sorry @cgss11 Dealing with a pet in pain is so helpless feeling, and having to make the decision on when to let go is excruciating. I think one of my big fears about a dog chiro would be that he/she would cause more damage than they'd fix. How do you even go about fixing an injury like that without input from the patient on where the pain is? And why wouldn't the vet have suggested that if it was an option? I'd just be really concerned about causing additional pain to such a sweet animal. When my 15 year old dog (that I had had from 6 weeks old) got an aggressive brain tumor, we struggled with exactly when we should make that decision. He wasn't in pain as far as we knew, but he went blind in a week and suddenly went demented - he couldn't recognize DH (would bite at him), only me, and he became extremely anxious and angry almost overnight. I still didn't know where to draw that line. DH, who was very attached to the dog, came to me one night and told me he thought it was time. And I NEEDED that so much. I needed him to be able to push me to it when it was needed because otherwise I just couldn't make that call on my own. And our biggest concern was his quality of life. It wasn't fair to him. One thing that did make it better for all of us was that we found a doggie-euthanasia home service run by a wonderful woman. She came out to the house, so he didn't have to get freaked out at the vet, and it was a very peaceful process with us holding him. She took his body to be cremated and sent the remains to us in a beautiful wooden box in a velvet bag. The whole experience was terrible, as it always will be, but those details really made a big difference. Anyways, I'm so sorry you're both going through this. I hope you are able to come to a decision soon that will ease your minds and her pain as much as possible.

My BF is ridiculously insignificant, particularly in comparison. I'm just annoyed that I have to stay late at work for a meeting that will run past the point that I go home every day. It's not very late - just an hour - but my pregnancy patience is thin. I just want to be at home lying on my couch in pajamas all the time. Anything else is a serious inconvenience.

princesslockness · October 2016

@cgss11 I'm so sorry that you are dealing with this difficult decision right now.

One thing I know, at least for humans, is that a chiro doesn't help with herniated discs. My dad has 3 in his neck, and his doctor has told him to not go to a chiro as it wont help and might make them worse. Again thats for HUMANS, but I would think a herniated disc is a herniated disc.

slartybartfast · October 2016

@cgss11 - what a hard time. though it sounds like you've blessed your pup with a loving, full life and that's a very happy thing.

My BF is minor and I fully recognize this is petty and whiney but walking is so uncomfortable to the point where I am just feeling really limited. Now here's where it gets really petty but I want a salad from a place a few blocks down for lunch but will probably get one from the place next door because walking ain't going to happen. Here's where it gets ridiculous - there's free transportation down to that other place but it just seems like too much of a hassle.

And... now I shall receive your "oh give me a break" glares with grace.

acreight13 · October 2016

@cgss11 So sorry to hear that! Losing a pet is never easy no matter the circumstance. I agree with @LinziLoo09. My DH had a 14 year old lab that we had to put to sleep almost two years ago. He was so sad and inconsolable about it that I needed to be the person who decided that it was time even though deep down he knew it too. He just couldn't bring himself to say the words out loud. Sending hugs your way.

Mine is this: DH and I own some land that we want to build our forever home on. I would love to live there yesterday and he's a little more reluctant because of finances etc. Well we found out last week that we have the opportunity to have our house built by a local technical center with their construction technology students. It would cost us less than half of what we were looking at to build the house we want. DH and I have been talking about it for a week and yesterday I finally just told him that if he wanted to say "No" he needed to just say it rather than come up with a bunch of reasons why now is not the best time. So he said "No" and I got a little teary because it's a big deal and then he was frustrated because I was upset saying that I was making him feel like an a-hole. I'm allowed to feel how I feel right? I wasn't yelling at him or making a scene I was just teary. Ugh.

LinziLoo09 · October 2016

@slartybartfast I totally went through my "disability" portion of 3rd tri last pregnancy where walking just wasn't going to happen anymore. I get it! I remember having to physically pull myself up out of the car with the handles. I haven't reached that point yet, but I am, apparently, making a lot of in-pain sound effects whenever I sit down. Because I went to put DD in her carseat the other day, and she let out a series of "Oomph, ugh, eesh, ahs" that are nothing more than her mimicking my pregnancy noises. Oops. Oh, and I hope you get your salad.

l9i · October 2016

We've been having a series of training meetings on how to troubleshoot a process at work. The last meeting one of the three of us was supposed to walk through resolving the issue we'd been trained on with the person teaching us. I'm the most experienced person and lead in the role, but I'm also leaving on maternity leave shortly. I indicated to the next experienced (the other is brand new) she should be the one to walk through it since it will be her primary responsibility while I'm out. She said she wasn't comfortable yet and wanted to see the person teaching us do it one more time. The whole meeting she worked on her laptop on other tasks. At the end of the meeting, I asked "Ok, now from those notes you should be able to replicate this on your own". She hadn't taken notes. So I spent all morning documenting the process in detail so that I don't get calls over this while I'm out. As someone with 3 years experience babysitting someone with 25 years experience this is incredibly frustrating. Either way, I copied our boss on the notes with the instruction they were to walk through it on their own. He's aware of her non-productivity and this is just another example to add to the list.... ughhh

penelope4612 · October 2016

@cgss11 - I'm sorry about your dog, that's awful. But I also agree with PPs, I'd be really concerned about a chiro making things worse. At least call the vet first and ask if they think it could be helpful.

@slartybartfast I'm there with you. My coworkers have picked up a lunch for me several times because it's hard to walk. I'm finally feeling better after some PT and then today I started having pelvic pressure when walking instead of back pain. Sigh. My BF was actually going to be that it drives me nuts to walk around in crowds (I live in the city) because people don't look where they are going and walk AT me all the time, and I am no longer mobile enough or fast enough to move out of the way quickly.

kbduke · October 2016

@slartybartfast I'm with you on the walking but only 50% of the time. Today? I feel great, no aches and pains. Yesterday? I couldn't move without feeling like I was dying.

@l9i ugh on your work situation. I'm trying to pass off tasks now but no one wants to accept the responsibility. I've been CC'ing my boss on emails too and figure that's pretty much all I can do at this point.

Diamond0323 · October 2016

I'm sitting in an epilepsy monitoring unit with 48 electrodes glues to my scalp. Not only am I stuck in bed hooked up to machines but I'm not allowed to use the bathroom without assistance (and little boy is headbutting my bladder every 5 min). To top it all of the wonderful doctor says they want me to have seizures.....so I'm on sleep deprivation and they want visitors to come stress me out, but DH won't come back until Friday when I get discharged and I'm 45 min from home. Getting anyone else to come see me is, well, let's just say it's to much to ask. I had my baby shower yesterday, sent out 63 invites, had 30 RSVPs and 10 actually show up, just to bitch about the food and say they were ready to go after 5 min. It would have been cheaper to just buy the stuff for this baby than plan the party, buy everything, and do ALL the cooking (which took all day Sat, well into the night and part of Sun morning). Never again! This week can go F#$% it's self. and there goes the machine again........

dmontgo · October 2016

I'm sorry I had to skip the puppy illness posts because I will sob and then probably pee my pants. I'm sorry for those that have dealt or are dealing with sick fur babies...my heart can't take it when animals are sick.

*sorry for the long rant!!*

My BF is actually from my baby shower on Saturday. Overall I had a great time, but one of hosts...his girlfriend was driving me and some other friends NUTS. Quick backstory--we have known (we'll call him Jake) for a while now. He recently got divorced from a controlling lady (she left him), and essentially found the same type of woman in his girlfriend (we'll call her Kristin). So...she shrieks....a lot....yelling at him/for him.

She essentially hijacked the baby shower planning from Jake and my other friend, Jen, but I didn't know until I showed up. Instead of having Halloween decorations, Kristin decorated with a bunch of pastel blues and baby decorations (which are not what was discussed). People were dressed in costumes...expecting a Halloween party. To make it worse, the games I specifically asked the hosts not to play...the poopy diaper and measuring of the belly games....Kristin shrieked at everyone to play...and OPENED a pack of diapers we were gifted to play. And she told DH to force feed me the cake...as if it was a freaking wedding.

I wish that was the worst of it. Kristin is very baby-crazy. I have never seen anything like it. Even while going through infertility, I never behaved the way she was. She's been telling me that she's going to steal Ashton...that we should leave all of the gifts we received at their house so she can take care of Ashton...that she's going to start babysitting when he's a few weeks old...that she wants to be in the delivery room. Even WORSE, a friend that had a baby a few weeks ago was there with her baby, and Kristin was constantly asking to hold the baby. If my friend was holding her, Kristin would be hanging behind her touching the baby and saying things like "Oh, Charlotte doesn't need her momma...she needs ME!"

Combined with her shrieking, I felt, and others felt, very uncomfortable. Normally I am very blunt and would have been extremely vocal about her outrageous behavior, but I was on my 3rd dose of meds by the time the party started (very tired and kind of listless), and it's Jake's girlfriend--we love Jake. So now we are asking ourselves if we tell Jake...who seems to be very, very infatuated with Kristin that she is out of line...or do we just get over it and let him dig his own hole? Hard to see him repeat the relationship pattern.

Trying not to be a brat because I am thankful for the shower...but I feel like Kristin stole the baby shower I envisioned and discussed with Jake and Jen and tried to make it about her and what kind of shower she would want. Anyway, sorry for this outrageously long rant.

mrsmerc2015 · October 2016

@cgss11 so sorry to hear that! I know nothing about dog chiropractic care, but I have had to make the decision to put down a dog and it is so hard. Hopefully your husband finds the strength to make the right decision.

My BF is that we need to find a daycare situation that works for DSD (MIL watched her but passed away a few weeks ago) since we only have her on 6 week days/4 week cycle - and we need to do it quickly. I telework on Fridays (we have her 3 Fridays out of each 4 week cycle) and typically watch her then, but we also have her one M-T-W, and I can't always telework all 3 of those days, particularly since I'm training my replacement and already set a schedule with her that requires me to be at my client site. To top that off, DH has an overnight work trip during our next M-T-W stretch, which is 2 weeks away, and we have zero backup. So far we've only found one licensed place that allows drop-in care on a day-to-day basis, but the hours are only 8am-1pm, which doesn't work when I have to go into the office. Ugh.

karmba · October 2016

@cgss11 I am so sorry for your dog and the situation you find yourself in. I dread being in this position someday when it comes to our dog. I agree with the others that a chiro might make the situation worse and well as be more expensive and really prolong your dog's suffering.

princesslockness · October 2016

@dmontgo Fuck Kristin. Put that shower stealing, baby crazy, narc in her place. Jake will eventually understand. And if he doesn't you can always pull the 'she ruined my party, and I'm pregnant+high risk+ hormonal'

My BF is that I woke up with a low grade fever this morning. Called the nurse to see what I need to do, and I'm on Tylenol+extra water+temps taken every 90 minutes. Because a fever of 100.3 is ok, but 100.4 is panic/L&D/Emergency CS depending on how E is doing. Also, I have this super weird pattern of contrax going on, 2-3 1 min long 4-5 min apart then 2-3 hrs of 20-30 second ones. Repeat ever 3 hrs. When I asked the nurse what to do how to stop them/make them pick up she responded 'watch them, if they get closer/stronger come in'.

sourlemon · October 2016

@Kate08Young did the nurse say why 100.4 was so horrible? When I had my kidney infection I was into the 101/102 range and no one was like "get this kid out now". I was just given iv antibiotics and fluids for 2.5 days until it was gone and my white blood cells count normalized.

princesslockness · October 2016

sourlemon said:

@Kate08Young did the nurse say why 100.4 was so horrible? When I had my kidney infection I was into the 101/102 range and no one was like "get this kid out now". I was just given iv antibiotics and fluids for 2.5 days until it was gone and my white blood cells count normalized.

Something about being almost 35 weeks + fairly constant 'mini' contractions + cerclage ripping out + dilated past 3cm. They are worried that I now have an infection in my ute which can cause serious issues for E. Also, all of this together my body isn't handling well and its getting close to when they will take E so I don't get worse.

cayaylonglegs · October 2016

@cgss11 I am so sorry about the situation you are in. I myself have never been in that situation but it makes me weepy just thinking about it.

@dmontgo echoing what Kate said. Fuckkkk that. I would most definitely tell Jake that she was out of line and made the shower awkward. It's better for him to know now and maybe change than to keep repeating the cycle. Of course this is much easier said than done.

No real BF for me. Nips are really sore and leaky and breathing has become a monumental task but we shall persevere.

Kacie209 · October 2016

Dang work computer! I need to listen to some webinar class as a refresher for something I used to do, and am going to start doing again but it's been a few years. I plug my headphones into the headphone jack (have been in my position since August and never used it before), hit unmute and start the video. Nothing. It shows something is making noise, but not what I am trying to get to... and it's not out for everyone else to hear. Boo. My headphones always worked in the past, so I hope it's not them!

Update: My BF is definitely on the low scale compared to everyone else's. *hugs*

tinattt23 · October 2016

For everyone who is done with walking, I'll do you walking if you do my sitting! I'm pretty much fine walking around but can't sit for more than 5 minutes without pain. Makes working at my desk rough. I'll go get you your salads and you guys do my work

dmontgo · October 2016

@Kate08Young @cayaylonglegs Thanks ladies! I try not to be a brat but...maybe stupidly...it hurt my feelings that it wasn't the shower I wanted. After the hurricane and BP shit I've been dealing with, I was really looking forward to it being the way it was discussed (Halloween/Nightmare Before Christmas) and just felt deflated and I wish I was a bit more mentally clear when it was going on. DH and Jake are very close, and DH feels the same, so I'm going to let him discuss it with Jake...if Kristin ever let's him be alone! X.X

sourlemon · October 2016

@Kate08Young I could see how the combo of things would be concerning. I was worried maybe I should have been freaking out more!

princesslockness · October 2016

@sourlemon Nope just my body and mind going to shit.

zubenescamali · October 2016

Oh I'm so sorry to hear about your dog @cgss11.

My BF is this extreme fatigue that seems to have come on this weekend. I'm not sure if it's because I'm fighting a cold or just at this stage in pregnancy but I took naps on both sat and sun and almost fell asleep at my desk today, which is so unlike me. It probably doesn't help that the only position I am comfortable in is laying down.

BabyRobbinsAdventure · October 2016

My BF is my dogs. They have been having problems with farting. Like, these farts smell like death is trying to reach my brain through my nose. This has been going on for over a month. In that time we have changed their food (twice) but the first made one have incredibly dry skin (like, we think it gave him an allergic reaction) and the second food we tried made the other dog's digestive system comparable to a pregnant woman's.
I don't know how much longer I can stand their smells. Hoping a solution is in the near future.

Upromise9687 · October 2016

@cgss11 I am so sorry to hear what you are going through. I dread the day I have to make these decision for our dog. Sending my thoughts along to you and your DH.

ashleygorokhovsky · October 2016

So sorry for doggy issues, work issues, and baby shower issues.

My BF is that this weekend was my baby shower and I had friends and family fly in from multiple states and I got deathly ill on Saturday morning. Being so close to the end I thought I would have avoided getting sick during pregnancy, but to no avail.

baby shower was nice, but I was literally miserable and couldn't hug anyone or focus for much more than an hour and a half. I feel like I let everyone down

had my regular appt today and they gave me a z pack, so I guess there's the silver lining in having so many doctors appointments!

dmontgo · October 2016

@Kate08Young Jake called DH very early this morning and told us that KRISTIN IS FUCKING PREGNANT OMG WTF.

Normally I would be ecstatic because Jake is so happy and wanted to have kids with his ex-wife but she didn't want them...but WHY DOES IT HAVE TO BE KRISTIN.

*toddler temper tantrum*

Toller · October 2016

@dmontgo ...we'll at least you know your human judgement is right on!! Poor jake (bitches be crazy)

AbriannaO · October 2016

@dmontgo, this is starting to sound like a LifeTime movie! Bring on the popcorn and let's see what Jake does!! I am sorry that the psycho had to make things uncomfortable at your shower, I would have not been so calm should that have happened to me.

dmontgo · October 2016

@Toller I hate being right all the time X.X

What makes it so frustrating is that back in May...before I even had a bump...she told me that she informed him that she was stopping birth control (they started dating officially in April when he got back from deployment...newly divorced). I was really taken aback by it because Jake is extremely intelligent and sensible--he advises top military officials. He's not stupid. But I assumed they had at least talked about it.

He's 33 and has been wanting children for some time (she's 24) so I guess they came to an agreement about kids? DH said that Jake is so happy that she is pregnant and is even happier our kids will be friends. Something just feels wrong to me and even though I love Jake...I don't feel happy about it. I feel pissed.

ea301 · October 2016

@dmontgo chiming in a little late but I don't think you are out of line at all to be annoyed by your shower not being what you'd envisioned. That should be the whole point of organizing it - to make the mother/parents happy and excited. To just do whatever YOU want as the host is incredibly selfish. I feel like you should offer to throw Kristin's baby shower and make it exactly what you want and something she would hate -- hehe. Karma!

My BF is something that someone mentioned somewhere else but I can't find it now (sorry, being lazy). I am also in the FB group and the repeats are starting to annoy me more by the day. It is definitely feeling like a completely separate community now - or maybe it always was? I like the girls there too (including the few of you who participate here too of course!) and don't want to ghost out but it is starting to be too much energy for me to keep up with posts here and there. I wish there was a happy medium where I could combine both into some sort of magical community that doesn't rely on The Bump's crappy app and annoying desktop ads.

Kacie209 · October 2016

Just need to get it off my chest.

I started a new position in August and have basically been getting my feet wet in a variety of things, since I'll be going on leave pretty soon anyway. It's good that I get to see a lot of things, but kind of stinks when I am only shown something once and never shown again.

Anyway, so yesterday this one coworker, who I am being trained to be her back up (obviously more so after I come back from mat leave), was helping me with something that she mainly does. Some of it I still needed assistance with, as you go through a lot of screens, and need ot make sure everything is notated correctly, etc. And, I appreciate that help. However, for one of the parts it was something on a specific screen that I had been working in for the last 15 years and knew VERY well. Just how she was explaining it to me was very condescending, even when I was like, "Yeah, I know that screen and what the aux code means so you don't need to define it, or tell me where I need to go to find what it means."

And sometime today or tomorrow, she's going to over another system we all use (company wide) that I used to actually manage a portion of in my previous position, but am sure will go over EVERYTHING like I have no experience with it. Even when I tell her that I used to do this in my previous position, I am sure she'll go more into detail. No... just show me what is different with what this department does now and I'll figure out the rest. Also, I helped create the new system when they were making changes to it a few years back, so it's not like I am not familiar with that either.

dmontgo · October 2016

@ea301 Surely she won't mind having a Halloween baby shower in the spring, right?

But seriously, Jake will probably ask me to throw it wah wah wah.

@Kacie209 I hate when people talk down to me like I'm an idiot. I experienced this in August when no one would help me write a proposal (my first one!) and when one guy finally decided to help, he talked to me like I didn't even know how to write a sentence. Wtf? I'm sorry you're experiencing it too.

princesslockness · October 2016

@dmontgo Bitches be cray cray!! Seriously though if I was Jake I'd demand a paternity test. That is some scary happenings in a super short time.

ajstevenson · October 2016

@dmontgo I was just about to recommend that you throw her a shower and then completely change the theme without telling her... Karma yo.

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