Nah, those are all boring and predictable. I'm more about the random topics that get people fired up.
On my last bmb we had this chick lose her mind because she received a formula sample and therefore formula companies were trying to sabotage her BF plan. Even boring topics can be pretty entertaining haha
Zero fucks given here. Although, If you don't have the common sense to use the search function or browse before posting then I think you should just go on and GTFO.
How many precincts do we have reporting? Maybe we can build a wall between the board(er) police and the free folk. What if the losing party doesn't concede?
Oh wait sorry... wrong election. Given how long this has been going on I was convinced it was November. Can we be done with this now for the love of all that is holy????
How many precincts do we have reporting? Maybe we can build a wall between the board(er) police and the free folk. What if the losing party doesn't concede?
Oh wait sorry... wrong election. Given how long this has been going on I was convinced it was November. Can we be done with this now for the love of all that is holy????
You can move on if you want, by all means, nobody is making you discuss this anymore. If other people still want to chime in, I say let them.
How many precincts do we have reporting? Maybe we can build a wall between the board(er) police and the free folk. What if the losing party doesn't concede?
Oh wait sorry... wrong election. Given how long this has been going on I was convinced it was November. Can we be done with this now for the love of all that is holy????
You can move on if you want, by all means, nobody is making you discuss this anymore. If other people still want to chime in, I say let them.
Oh good do you have a new POV to offer? Perhaps an alternative approach to the matter? We're not getting anywhere. Despite a majority expressing a desire for organization on shared topics/events, albeit with room for individual threads when warranted, some of the ladies just won't accept it. We literally have the same group of people talking in circles here. I'm far from the first person to express how exhausting this topic is becoming and a preference to move on to fun things ("agree to disagree"), but you've opted to zero in on my calling out that fact merely because you're upset I disagreed with you elsewhere. Well isn't that mature. Here is the problem... Despite a poll about board structure, the ladies who share your POV are flat out saying they don't seem to give a shit regardless and are going to do what they want anyway. So tell me... what is the point in discussing it further? And BTW... I don't actually see you discussing the topic of board structure in recent posts on this thread either.
How many precincts do we have reporting? Maybe we can build a wall between the board(er) police and the free folk. What if the losing party doesn't concede?
Oh wait sorry... wrong election. Given how long this has been going on I was convinced it was November. Can we be done with this now for the love of all that is holy????
You can move on if you want, by all means, nobody is making you discuss this anymore. If other people still want to chime in, I say let them.
Nah, those are all boring and predictable. I'm more about the random topics that get people fired up.
On my last bmb we had this chick lose her mind because she received a formula sample and therefore formula companies were trying to sabotage her BF plan. Even boring topics can be pretty entertaining haha
We're you in April 15? Because this sounds familiar.
Me: 26 DH: 27 Married 6-15-13 DS born 4-9-15 Septate Uterus BFP 10/12/16--EDD 6/24/17
Nah, those are all boring and predictable. I'm more about the random topics that get people fired up.
On my last bmb we had this chick lose her mind because she received a formula sample and therefore formula companies were trying to sabotage her BF plan. Even boring topics can be pretty entertaining haha
We're you in April 15? Because this sounds familiar.
I was in August but it wouldn't surprise me if it's happened more than once. Those evil formula companies just can't be stopped...
How many precincts do we have reporting? Maybe we can build a wall between the board(er) police and the free folk. What if the losing party doesn't concede?
Oh wait sorry... wrong election. Given how long this has been going on I was convinced it was November. Can we be done with this now for the love of all that is holy????
You can move on if you want, by all means, nobody is making you discuss this anymore. If other people still want to chime in, I say let them.
You are way too literal. Or can't read snark.
I'm actually just really tired of her negativity. The best way to let something die is to leave it alone, so if you want it to die, I would suggest just that.
How many precincts do we have reporting? Maybe we can build a wall between the board(er) police and the free folk. What if the losing party doesn't concede?
Oh wait sorry... wrong election. Given how long this has been going on I was convinced it was November. Can we be done with this now for the love of all that is holy????
You can move on if you want, by all means, nobody is making you discuss this anymore. If other people still want to chime in, I say let them.
Oh good do you have a new POV to offer? Perhaps an alternative approach to the matter? We're not getting anywhere. Despite a majority expressing a desire for organization on shared topics/events, albeit with room for individual threads when warranted, some of the ladies just won't accept it. We literally have the same group of people talking in circles here. I'm far from the first person to express how exhausting this topic is becoming and a preference to move on to fun things ("agree to disagree"), but you've opted to zero in on my calling out that fact merely because you're upset I disagreed with you elsewhere. Well isn't that mature. Here is the problem... Despite a poll about board structure, the ladies who share your POV are flat out saying they don't seem to give a shit regardless and are going to do what they want anyway. So tell me... what is the point in discussing it further? And BTW... I don't actually see you discussing the topic of board structure in recent posts on this thread either.
ETA:
Sorry that you saw it that way? You just seemed to want this to die, yet you keep commenting on things like this. It's just frustrating. I didn't mean to call you out, but you are being a little immature. Thanks for making fun of me for not being able to read your tone. Not hurtful at all. Don't bother replying because I won't be commenting again, because I really do want this topic to die. Have a nice day, I really do mean that.
I'll be honest and give my opinion being a 1st time user of tb. It's not easy to memorize all of the rules and guidelines if you're not used to them. I know I try to post things in the appropriate topics, however I know personally I am hesitant to start any new thread and/or ask for advice without being worried that I'm going against guidelines or will get a message telling me to post my question in another thread. Some threads get pretty long and can be hard to follow if you're unable to come on every single day. From my experience with starting new threads, only people that want to respond to the topic will read it and respond. I had thought the whole point of joining tb was to find people going through the same as you and to find support and comfort in what we say to one another. I generally sit on the outside looking in and post as much as I feel comfortable doing (as I am one of the overly sensitive people while pregnant). Although I must admit I have a lot of negativity going on with my pregnancy and would love to be able to talk to anyone more about what's going on......with people who are also pregnant (and without too much judgement) but unless I'm 100% sure I'm posting in the correct thread, I usually won't cause im overly sensitive and really cant handle any added stress or negativity right now. We all have raging horomones and we will all clash at one time or another, but we're all supposed to be here together until June to make our pregnancies easier and take comfort in knowing we have other people in the same boat as us......some more experienced in the ins and outs of pregnancy and all the joys and pains associated with it. Some people are more outgoing than others and some aren't........some experience more anger and are more irritable, while others are more sensitive and emotional. If anyone should understand the different emotions, it should be us pregnant folks. Sometimes ppl might be freaking out and need to think that their concern/anxiety/fears will be read and responded to asap, so they start a new thread. But when we point our how it's in the wrong thread, they won't feel reassured at all......they'll feel as though they're being judged and the people supposed to be here to help through the process couldn't care less unless we follow every single guideline to a t. Sure maybe they're too sensitive in some people's minds......but maybe they're overly sensitive due to the horomones. We can't help how we feel sometimes and for any newbies, we also don't know how to recognize our horomones are strong and not take a defensive stance or just automatically assume tb is not a fun and/or positive place to be on while travelling down the road to motherhood. Maybe it's just me who thinks this way, but I had thought that was the point of joining these types of groups.......help each other in any way we can to feel more confident and comfortable with our pregnancies from now till June.
I'm all for some structure, but I don't think people should be told they should have posted somewhere else, because it may deter someone from posting again and that person may really need our support. Not everyone has the time to review all the posts and topics before they post, and I personally am still willing to read their post and respond if I have helpful information. If you personally are not willing to do that, then don't respond to that post.
As an aside, would anyone be up for something like a Meal Plan Monday? We talked about meal planning once a while back and it was very helpful. Also, I was thinking maybe Thankful Thursday? I think between Monday B*fest, WTF Wednesday, UO Thursday and FFFC we have a lot of negativity and could benefit from making one day positive. Just an idea.
Overall, I think it's early and still hard to tell how relationships will play out, but I think we all have the same goals of making some friends and supporting each other through our pregnancies and beyond, so perhaps we can just all work toward that goal.
I don't care about thread organization, but here's my one suggested rule: if you're going to reference another thread with fantastic drama, post a link with that $#€£. It's like a giant tease, and I'm far too lazy to go searching through the archives. Cater to my train-wreck loving laziness, dangit!
I'm all for some structure, but I don't think people should be told they should have posted somewhere else, because it may deter someone from posting again and that person may really need our support. Not everyone has the time to review all the posts and topics before they post, and I personally am still willing to read their post and respond if I have helpful information. If you personally are not willing to do that, then don't respond to that post.
As an aside, would anyone be up for something like a Meal Plan Monday? We talked about meal planning once a while back and it was very helpful. Also, I was thinking maybe Thankful Thursday? I think between Monday B*fest, WTF Wednesday, UO Thursday and FFFC we have a lot of negativity and could benefit from making one day positive. Just an idea.
Overall, I think it's early and still hard to tell how relationships will play out, but I think we all have the same goals of making some friends and supporting each other through our pregnancies and beyond, so perhaps we can just all work toward that goal.
I think Meal Plan and Thankful threads are a great idea.
Me: 28 DH: 30
Married 5/8/2011 TTC #1 since 9/2015 BFP #1 1/14/16, MC 3/23/16 BFP #2 9/21/2016, EDD 5/30/2017
I don't care about thread organization, but here's my one suggested rule: if you're going to reference another thread with fantastic drama, post a link with that $#€£. It's like a giant tease, and I'm far too lazy to go searching through the archives. Cater to my train-wreck loving laziness, dangit!
Any and all group conversation topics have always been welcomed by all members! The list in the guidelines thread is just suggestions, not the end all be all by any means!
I like specific threads. I haven't read any of the pregnancy chat threads recently because I do not have time to read through seven or ten pages of random stuff that I don't relate to. But someone posts "morning sickness so bad today," it will probably be shorter and I will click on that to commiserate.
I don't mind organized threads, but I also think one-off posts are great too. There are no organized posts and people post random stuff all the time on the TK chit chat board. There's no problem with there being SO MANY that stuff gets bumped off the page fast. It's NBD. I think the worry that the organized threads will get bumped off the page fast is making a mountain out of a molehill.
Here's a thought. Maybe if the organized threads are being bumped off the front page, it's for a good reason. If people aren't posting in them, why should they stay on the first page?
@hjphillips - Well I will reply because like it or not, we're going to be here together until June (I hope). I comment where things are brought up that I have an opinion about. This is a thread about board structure so it seemed reasonable to discuss my opinion on the subject, but it quickly became apparent that we (the BMB) are not getting anywhere. I then tried to joke around in hopes we could move on to bigger and better things, but you got on me despite 1) I was just trying to drop it despite brief polling seeming to align with my POV and 2) I wasn't the first to express how this is going no where. You seem to have issue with me for whatever reason. I don't take issue with you or the ladies with a different POV than me on this or any issue that will undoubtedly arise. I genuinely want to see the members of J17 form strong bonds and have a fun, healthy 9 months. That is why I keep chiming in with my POV for board structure. I truly believe it could help the majority as I have witnessed a few varying formats. I'm not doing it to be annoying or "stubborn". I'm sharing my experience and opinion as you are. I am not mandating anything nor am I trying to force anyone anywhere. I have a sarcastic and lighthearted personality despite how some are interpreting my replies/tone. Furthermore, my reply was not making fun of you. My reply to you was in defense of myself as you called me out for trying to be lighthearted and agreeing with others that we should just let it be. I was however making fun of the looming election in Nov. That's not mocking you, but I'm truly sorry if you interpreted it that way and were hurt by it.
Just throwing my $0.02 in. I did indicate in the rules post that I'm going to post when I feel like I have something I want to talk about. And of course I'll make sure I don't already see another post about it first. But I don't want to have to be afraid of posting because someone is going to jump on me for not putting it in a discussion thread.
What Ashley.G wrote above made me kind of sad: here's a first time poster here wanting to get involved but afraid because she doesn't want to make a mistake by posting something "wrong". I wish she felt more comfortable. I wish there wasn't policing of threads.
Maybe I'm wrong, but I still think this will organically work itself out with time. I really hope so. My September '10 mamas are still some of my dearest friends and we keep in touch daily. My November '16 mamas are still a huge source of support for me even after my loss. I want everyone to have the same experience.
Seems like the majority of us are fine with structured threads but are also fine with individual stuff. Can't we just roll with this?
I'm reserving my angst for just trying to survive these next two months.
Me: 38 l DH: 41 Gavin - 8/27/10 *TW* Gabriel - 2nd tri loss 5/17/16 Trisomy 18 & 21 Hope - 2nd tri loss 12/7/16 complications from pneumonia
@Mother0fDragons I thought maybe it was a certain someone who was an admin of a certain fb group...and yeah I wouldn't be surprised if this happened more than once
Me: 26 DH: 27 Married 6-15-13 DS born 4-9-15 Septate Uterus BFP 10/12/16--EDD 6/24/17
Would trying a daily Pregnancy Chatter/Questions thread and also a daily Random Chatter be a good starting point? I'd just like to find something that works and addresses the complaints.
Would trying a daily Pregnancy Chatter/Questions thread and also a daily Random Chatter be a good starting point? I'd just like to find something that works and addresses the complaints.
I think it should be left alone for awhile and see how the board develops. Continue with the threads that already exist and let people post on their own if they want. No more "this should go on the weekly whatever thread" comments. Let people get comfortable posting and over time the structure will develop. I thinking forcing it is what makes people feel uncomfortable or policed even when that isn't the intention.
@swanbrooner I think daily posts would be a good way to meet everyone's issues. They'll be shorter, direct some of the one off threads, and still create a good space for us to all hold a conversation. I like knowing where people are talking without having to click through ten different posts about the same thing. Everyone is nauseous, everyone is emotional.
The talking to your boss post was a perfect example of a great one off thread that is totally merited.
Nobody is trying to police the board so much as focus the conversations so we can all be as involved as possible with the time we do have to be on TB each day.
@swanbrooner I think daily posts would be a good way to meet everyone's issues. They'll be shorter, direct some of the one off threads, and still create a good space for us to all hold a conversation. I like knowing where people are talking without having to click through ten different posts about the same thing. Everyone is nauseous, everyone is emotional.
The talking to your boss post was a perfect example of a great one off thread that is totally merited.
Nobody is trying to police the board so much as focus the conversations so we can all be as involved as possible with the time we do have to be on TB each day.
I think that makes complete sense and seems to align with the poll results if nothing else. I definitely think there were some great one off topics today that are perfect examples of the non structured flow that will (and should) always have a place (eg the low heartbeat thread and when to tell woke thread). Now time for some other hot mess debates.
I find it interesting that so many comment that the "when to tell work" thread is a great example of a thread that should be posted on its own....and yet the first commenter disagrees. Regardless of what the topic is there will always be someone who thinks it belongs on some other thread. The comprise that would probably satisfy the majority is have whatever structured threads are wanted but it's not necessary to comment on individual threads with "this belongs on another thread". There are obvious individual threads that will be flamed but for the most use the search to make sure you aren't the 25th poster on a topic and then go for it.
I find it interesting that so many comment that the "when to tell work" thread is a great example of a thread that should be posted on its own....and yet the first commenter disagrees. Regardless of what the topic is there will always be someone who thinks it belongs on some other thread. The comprise that would probably satisfy the majority is have whatever structured threads are wanted but it's not necessary to comment on individual threads with "this belongs on another thread". There are obvious individual threads that will be flamed but for the most use the search to make sure you aren't the 25th poster on a topic and then go for it.
Well I think here is the problem. @mrlight commented to that OP that the topic was just discussed in a different thread and there were a lot of responses that would potentially give OP more info. She then went on to answer her question and was very welcoming. You are interpreting that as "this belongs elsewhere" which naturally will lead you to feel policed, but that is NOT what was happening. I too have answered an OP and helpfully directed to where there are also more answers. You're probably reading way too deep into helpful responses and making assumptions about a responder's intent based on their previously expressed preference for some level of org. The topic itself does warrant its own thread though.
@Elyse1384 That's what I was thinking. I was trying to come up with a solution that matched the poll results, but also addressed the majority of the complaints about the long threads. It seems backwards to have this lengthy debate without making changes suggested by the discussion from both sides.
I find it interesting that so many comment that the "when to tell work" thread is a great example of a thread that should be posted on its own....and yet the first commenter disagrees. Regardless of what the topic is there will always be someone who thinks it belongs on some other thread. The comprise that would probably satisfy the majority is have whatever structured threads are wanted but it's not necessary to comment on individual threads with "this belongs on another thread". There are obvious individual threads that will be flamed but for the most use the search to make sure you aren't the 25th poster on a topic and then go for it.
Well I think here is the problem. @mrlight commented to that OP that the topic was just discussed in a different thread and there were a lot of responses that would potentially give OP more info. She then went on to answer her question and was very welcoming. You are interpreting that as "this belongs elsewhere" which naturally will lead you to feel policed, but that is NOT what was happening. I too have answered an OP and helpfully directed to where there are also more answers. You're probably reading way too deep into helpful responses and making assumptions about a responder's intent based on their previously expressed preference for some level of org. The topic itself does warrant its own thread though.
While I get what you are saying it would also be helpful to look at it from the other point of view. Instead of saying you are interpreting it wrong instead look at all the people commenting that they are hesitant to post and why. I personally haven't felt policed and haven't really started a thread but lots of people do and that's where most of us are coming from. Nobody is saying that there isn't a place for structure but when someone posts a thread and it's met with "this is a great topic for whatever thread" it makes them hesitate to post in the future. Even if you feel you are being helpful it's not always taken that way.
I'm going to be honest here and say that I read the first 5 replies to this and moved on because really?? I have loved TB as a community of women going through the same thing together--at the very same time. I don't want to worry that I'm going to piss someone off by posting something that is too diary-ish, and as a working mother of two kids, ain't nobody got time to sift through a disorganized 157 post thread to see what people are talking about. At this point, I'm just going to let the board shake out and cross my fingers that we can all just find some happy medium without it being a big deal. We all have babies in our bellies to be thankful for and a thousand things to worry about in our world. This board shouldn't be one of them.
Married 7/11/09 TTC #1 Since 05/10 BFP #1 09/20/10 Natural m/c 10/05/10 BFP! #2 04/21/11... Beta 16 DPO: 437, 18 DPO:1446 Ultrasound 6w6d TWINS! Annabel & Sophia Born 11/28/11 at 34w6d BFP #3 10/4/16... Beta 13 DPO: 145, 15 DPO: 367 12/1/16 It's a GIRL!
Zero fucks given here. Although, If you don't have the common sense to use the search function or browse before posting then I think you should just go on and GTFO.
This is basically where I am. I just ignore the one offs with titles that sound like something I don't care about or have already discussed elsewhere. but multiple threads on the exact same topic annoy me big time.
If @abmommy15 you haven't felt personally policed then I'm not sure why you're so vested. None of the posters who have been 'policed' are even speaking up. You are now assuming how other posters have felt when being redirected. There have been several individual posts and they've received honest, helpful answers from many of the posters who are 'against' individual posts. No one has been flamed, some have been redirected.
At at the end of the day, not a single person said 'don't make individual posts!' It's simply just a preference to keep things organized. Clearly there are still individual posts happening. Those people are either oblivious, or just don't care and post whatever they want. And that's their perogative, people will comment or they won't and that's their perogative.
this is all really kind of silly and being beaten to death. Things will fall where they may and we will all go on to hopefully have healthy babies and laugh about this in 7+ months.
Nah, those are all boring and predictable. I'm more about the random topics that get people fired up.
On my last bmb we had this chick lose her mind because she received a formula sample and therefore formula companies were trying to sabotage her BF plan. Even boring topics can be pretty entertaining haha
Ohhhh I remember her! The postal worker had the never to bring the package to her front porch so it didn't get caught in the rain.
Thanks @claireCF! I'm so sorry for the loss of Game 1 @thatlauragirl! As a Red Sox fan I'm partial to both teams (Terry and Nap vs Tito and Lester) but I have to say I am pulling a little more for the Cubbies.
I'm with @berg on this. As a Red Sox fan, I am pulling for Cubbies fans to end their WS championship drought and break the curse. Now more a warning...should that happen things are just never quite the same again. Queue bandwagon fans and a little bit of the edge is lost, but soooooo worth it.
Re: Structured Threads Debate
Oh wait sorry... wrong election. Given how long this has been going on I was convinced it was November. Can we be done with this now for the love of all that is holy????
ETA:
Married 6-15-13
DS born 4-9-15
Septate Uterus
BFP 10/12/16--EDD 6/24/17
Sorry that you saw it that way? You just seemed to want this to die, yet you keep commenting on things like this. It's just frustrating. I didn't mean to call you out, but you are being a little immature. Thanks for making fun of me for not being able to read your tone. Not hurtful at all. Don't bother replying because I won't be commenting again, because I really do want this topic to die. Have a nice day, I really do mean that.
As an aside, would anyone be up for something like a Meal Plan Monday? We talked about meal planning once a while back and it was very helpful. Also, I was thinking maybe Thankful Thursday? I think between Monday B*fest, WTF Wednesday, UO Thursday and FFFC we have a lot of negativity and could benefit from making one day positive. Just an idea.
Overall, I think it's early and still hard to tell how relationships will play out, but I think we all have the same goals of making some friends and supporting each other through our pregnancies and beyond, so perhaps we can just all work toward that goal.
DS1 - 7/2011, DD 12/2012, DS2 - 4/2014, MMC - 12/2015
TTC #1 since 9/2015
BFP #1 1/14/16, MC 3/23/16
BFP #2 9/21/2016, EDD 5/30/2017
Any and all group conversation topics have always been welcomed by all members! The list in the guidelines thread is just suggestions, not the end all be all by any means!
I don't mind organized threads, but I also think one-off posts are great too. There are no organized posts and people post random stuff all the time on the TK chit chat board. There's no problem with there being SO MANY that stuff gets bumped off the page fast. It's NBD. I think the worry that the organized threads will get bumped off the page fast is making a mountain out of a molehill.
Here's a thought. Maybe if the organized threads are being bumped off the front page, it's for a good reason. If people aren't posting in them, why should they stay on the first page?
What Ashley.G wrote above made me kind of sad: here's a first time poster here wanting to get involved but afraid because she doesn't want to make a mistake by posting something "wrong". I wish she felt more comfortable. I wish there wasn't policing of threads.
Maybe I'm wrong, but I still think this will organically work itself out with time. I really hope so. My September '10 mamas are still some of my dearest friends and we keep in touch daily. My November '16 mamas are still a huge source of support for me even after my loss. I want everyone to have the same experience.
Seems like the majority of us are fine with structured threads but are also fine with individual stuff. Can't we just roll with this?
I'm reserving my angst for just trying to survive these next two months.
Gavin - 8/27/10
*TW*
Gabriel - 2nd tri loss 5/17/16 Trisomy 18 & 21
Hope - 2nd tri loss 12/7/16 complications from pneumonia
Married 6-15-13
DS born 4-9-15
Septate Uterus
BFP 10/12/16--EDD 6/24/17
The talking to your boss post was a perfect example of a great one off thread that is totally merited.
Nobody is trying to police the board so much as focus the conversations so we can all be as involved as possible with the time we do have to be on TB each day.
Me: 29 DH: 35
Married: 9/29/12
DS #1: 3/8/15Post a new thread or don't. Let's just have some fun and grow some healthy babies!
Married 7/11/09 TTC #1 Since 05/10
BFP #1 09/20/10 Natural m/c 10/05/10
BFP! #2 04/21/11... Beta 16 DPO: 437, 18 DPO:1446 Ultrasound 6w6d TWINS!
Annabel & Sophia Born 11/28/11 at 34w6d
BFP #3 10/4/16... Beta 13 DPO: 145, 15 DPO: 367 12/1/16 It's a GIRL!
At at the end of the day, not a single person said 'don't make individual posts!' It's simply just a preference to keep things organized. Clearly there are still individual posts happening. Those people are either oblivious, or just don't care and post whatever they want. And that's their perogative, people will comment or they won't and that's their perogative.
this is all really kind of silly and being beaten to death. Things will fall where they may and we will all go on to hopefully have healthy babies and laugh about this in 7+ months.
On the bright side, I fell asleep before it was over (thanks, pregnancy exhaustion!) so that took some of the sting out of it.
Gavin - 8/27/10
*TW*
Gabriel - 2nd tri loss 5/17/16 Trisomy 18 & 21
Hope - 2nd tri loss 12/7/16 complications from pneumonia
I'm so sorry for the loss of Game 1 @thatlauragirl! As a Red Sox fan I'm partial to both teams (Terry and Nap vs Tito and Lester) but I have to say I am pulling a little more for the Cubbies.
Edit: Words are a struggle today