Structured Threads Debate

mrlight · October 2016

Almost every thread we have has turned into a debate over the structure of the board and posts. I thought the easiest thing to do would be to create a poll so everyone can vote, then we can see how the majority feels about the issue, so we can finally end this discussion and move on to more fun discussions!

swanbrooner · October 2016

Other: any thread is okay as long as it is conducive to group conversation, which is what the guidelines already state anyway. Structured threads will also be used to help organize questions and reoccurring conversations.

Individual threads should be reserved for special circumstances such as someone experiencing a loss. No one needs their own thread to use members as personal Google for a question or for a Diary Entry.

I think some people have the wrong idea that people on Team Organization think you can only start certain threads or you have to stick to the suggested weekly and daily thread posts only when making no threads. This is not true whatsoever. You just don't need your own thread unless it's some sort of emergency that requires individualized attention.

I hope we can squash this. I just want to talk about TV shows and bitch about stuff together.

Elyse1384 · October 2016

swanbrooner said:

Other: any thread is okay as long as it is conducive to group conversation, which is what the guidelines already state anyway. Structured threads will also be used to help organize questions and reoccurring conversations.

Individual threads should be reserved for special circumstances such as someone experiencing a loss. No one needs their own thread to use member states as personal Google for a question or for a Diary Entry.

I think some people have the wrong idea that people on Team Organization think you can only start certain threads or you have to stick to the suggested weekly and daily thread posts only when making no threads. This is not true whatsoever. You just don't need your own thread unless it's some sort of emergency that requires individualized attention.

I hope we can squash this. I just want to talk about TV shows and bitch about stuff together.

All the love tits to this! My goodness every time I try to give an opinion on some level of organization I feel like I'm met with

Image: https://67.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_ls5onanI061qcb58yo1_500.gif

BelhurstBride · October 2016

swanbrooner said:

Individual threads should be reserved for special circumstances such as someone experiencing a loss. No one needs their own thread to use members as personal Google for a question or for a Diary Entry.

See, that's what I disagree with. In the ten or so years I've been posting on TK/TN/TB I've never felt the "personal Google" questions were that cumbersome, particularly on a BMB. Every once in awhile you'll get a fly by night poster who will post it (and I assume they will on a board with rules, too). People either flammed the person, or answered the question and the thread was quickly buried. It's just never been such a big of a deal that rules need to be made on structured threads or not.

This is a BMB, not TTGP, et al. It's going to pretty much be the same chicks for a year or so. It's not going to have same turnover as the national boards.

thankfully · October 2016

Other: Do not GAF, I just prefer lax enforcement of any and all "rules". The board police vibe bothers me more than any type of thread.

hjphillips · October 2016

thankfully said:

Other: Do not GAF, I just prefer lax enforcement of any and all "rules". The board police vibe bothers me more than any type of thread.

This.

swanbrooner · October 2016

@BelhurstBride
I totally get that, and I think eventually we will have a core group of active posters as we progress.

Right now, it seems that there are a ton of ladies here based on the intro. thread. It just seems like there would be an overwhelming amount of one off quesrion threads clogging up the board, burying other ones where more group discussion is taking place.

It would be so blah to log-in and just see a laundry list of early pregnancy questions to answer. I think you said it yesterday, I would love to see more conversation that has nothing to do with pregnancy or symptoms.

brij2006 · October 2016

I don't really care what is decided, but will say that I rarely read the pregnancy chatter thread. It gets all jumbled with tangents and is hard to keep up with and follow.

bornmommy · October 2016

BelhurstBride said:

swanbrooner said:

Individual threads should be reserved for special circumstances such as someone experiencing a loss. No one needs their own thread to use members as personal Google for a question or for a Diary Entry.

See, that's what I disagree with. In the ten or so years I've been posting on TK/TN/TB I've never felt the "personal Google" questions were that cumbersome, particularly on a BMB. Every once in awhile you'll get a fly by night poster who will post it (and I assume they will on a board with rules, too). People either flammed the person, or answered the question and the thread was quickly buried. It's just never been such a big of a deal that rules need to be made on structured threads or not.

This is a BMB, not TTGP, et al. It's going to pretty much be the same chicks for a year or so. It's not going to have same turnover as the national boards.

I'm in 100% agreement with @BelhurstBride. I like the weekly organized threads (PGAL, 2+ Moms Check in, TTGP check in, Meal Planning, etc) but don't think a ban on individual threads barring extreme circumstances like loss is necessary. Personally, I get overwhelmed seeing a thread thats even 30 responses in and tend to skip over a few here and there - making it hard to really GTK the ladies here. It's always been my experience on BMBs to be just what Belhurstbride said - the individual threads get flamed or answered depending on the person/question/comment and then buried. Its also a lot easier to distinguish between normal crazy or crazy crazy if people are posting their own stuff, IMHO.

BelhurstBride · October 2016

@swanbrooner, that's pretty much been my experience. I've never been on a BMB that's full of just pregnancy talk, and I've certainly never been on one with a ton of rules. I think the fear and possibility of pregnancy questions overwhelming the board is just being exaggerated.

I don't find random questions to answer blah. They tend to get buried fast. I don't enjoy logging on and seeing a 7 page thread on whatever. It's hard to read through it all, catch up and find something valuable is on page 3 but feel it's too late to bother to respond.

I fear the board's going to end up blah because there's posters who aren't comfortable starting a thread without someone responding with "well, this would be better suited under xyz thread"

JAGinMI · October 2016

swanbrooner said:

I think some people have the wrong idea that people on Team Organization think you can only start certain threads or you have to stick to the suggested weekly and daily thread posts only when making no threads. This is not true whatsoever.

THIS. Wtf? I am so confused as to how creating a organized threads was construed as you not being allowed to post an individual thread. I am all for both. But there are some topics, like the majority of symptoms, that make a lot of sense to have in one thread so that the board is not inundated with the same stuff over and over again, especially at the beginning when there are a lot of first pregnancies and a lot of new faces (and by faces I mean names

). If you have an uncommon symptom, post an individual thread to talk about it if you want to. I literally could not care less.

I also cannot begin to fathom why when someone posts "Omg, I am soooooo nauseous, what about you?" it is so wrong for the response to be, "Hey, a lot of us are feeling nauseous 24/7 and check out X thread where we have been commiserating about it for 3 days." What is so wrong with that?? If that is "off-putting" and bothers someone, then I think they need to evaluate their sensitivity. I think those responses have actually been VERY nice. Just because someone responds that way doesn't mean that you are not allowed to post anything individually, it means that we are pointing to where they can see a lot of people are already talking about their issue.

abmommy15 · October 2016

bornmommy said:

BelhurstBride said:

swanbrooner said:

Individual threads should be reserved for special circumstances such as someone experiencing a loss. No one needs their own thread to use members as personal Google for a question or for a Diary Entry.

See, that's what I disagree with. In the ten or so years I've been posting on TK/TN/TB I've never felt the "personal Google" questions were that cumbersome, particularly on a BMB. Every once in awhile you'll get a fly by night poster who will post it (and I assume they will on a board with rules, too). People either flammed the person, or answered the question and the thread was quickly buried. It's just never been such a big of a deal that rules need to be made on structured threads or not.

This is a BMB, not TTGP, et al. It's going to pretty much be the same chicks for a year or so. It's not going to have same turnover as the national boards.

I'm in 100% agreement with @BelhurstBride. I like the weekly organized threads (PGAL, 2+ Moms Check in, TTGP check in, Meal Planning, etc) but don't think a ban on individual threads barring extreme circumstances like loss is necessary. Personally, I get overwhelmed seeing a thread thats even 30 responses in and tend to skip over a few here and there - making it hard to really GTK the ladies here. It's always been my experience on BMBs to be just what Belhurstbride said - the individual threads get flamed or answered depending on the person/question/comment and then buried. Its also a lot easier to distinguish between normal crazy or crazy crazy if people are posting their own stuff, IMHO.

All of this. Some structured threads are great but there is no need to force everything into one. Some of them get so long I don't have the time to read through it all and could very well miss a question that I have experience with or a request for support. In addition, people could miss the responses to their questions because they get buried, tag didn't work etc. When you post your own it's easy to see the responses instead of sifting through a giant thread to see if someone happened to respond to you.

Elyse1384 · October 2016

Serious question @BelhurstBride - Have you been on TB regularly (prior to this pregnancy) since the exodus? I was here for M14 (although I elected to stay silent and enjoy the flames from the shadows) and I was very active on N15. I was only on IF and TTGP for 3 months prior to this BFP so I have spent most of my Bump life on the BMBs. Once the ban hammer started coming down '15, you couldn't just flame the drive bys, trolls and AWs any longer. You'll find yourself with 3 strikes mighty fast if you take that approach (sad but true). I miss the GBCBs and ability to give a candid response. Not a fan of the perpetual rainbow farts TB wants to enforce. It seems the best approach to all of TB's new rules is to have some level of structure so when the inevitable happens and the trolls, AWs and drive bys come through, valuable topics are much less likely to get bumped off page 1 and you can easily mention to the OP the preferred board decorum (trust me it is an easier out than a warning). I have also found that it genuinely does foster conversation and community when you have those interested in a common topic chatting together rather than multiple threads concerning the same issue. I'm curious to see what the larger BMB says, but it seems like most here aren't that far off on preferred layout. So far, no one has voted for "only structured threads" and no one is voting for "only individual threads". I also don't know what BMB some ladies have been spending time on, but I see no board police here. This board has been very tame.

abmommy15 · October 2016

I will add that if everyone sits back and lets the board develop it will find a happy medium on on its own. Someone posts the 50th thread on a topic flame away, someone needs support and creates their own, awesome let them. The board will find its groove without 100 topics and comments about how it's going to run. I think we just need to let it happen.

BelhurstBride · October 2016

abmommy15 said:

I will add that if everyone sits back and lets the board develop it will find a happy medium on on its own. Someone posts the 50th thread on a topic flame away, someone needs support and creates their own, awesome let them. The board will find its groove without 100 topics and comments about how it's going to run. I think we just need to let it happen.

Exactly. This is exactly my thing. Just stop with the rules. Just let it happen.

Assiram42 · October 2016

mrlight · October 2016

It seems like so far, most people want the structured posts, but are okay with individual posts. The biggest argument has been about the length of some of the threads. Would everyone be okay with a compromise of keeping all of the structured posts except for the "Weekly Random/Spam" thread and questions asked in that thread be made into individual posts? Then, if people duplicate topics that are on the first page, we flame them.

hjphillips · October 2016

mrlight said:

It seems like so far, most people want the structured posts, but are okay with individual posts. The biggest argument has been about the length of some of the threads. Would everyone be okay with a compromise of keeping all of the structured posts except for the "Weekly Random/Spam" thread and questions asked in that thread be made into individual posts? Then, if people duplicate topics that are on the first page, we flame them.

I feel like this is exactly what we've been trying to tell you would work better.

Elyse1384 · October 2016

JAGinMI said:

swanbrooner said:

I think some people have the wrong idea that people on Team Organization think you can only start certain threads or you have to stick to the suggested weekly and daily thread posts only when making no threads. This is not true whatsoever.

THIS. Wtf? I am so confused as to how creating a organized threads was construed as you not being allowed to post an individual thread. I am all for both. But there are some topics, like the majority of symptoms, that make a lot of sense to have in one thread so that the board is not inundated with the same stuff over and over again, especially at the beginning when there are a lot of first pregnancies and a lot of new faces (and by faces I mean names ). If you have an uncommon symptom, post an individual thread to talk about it if you want to. I literally could not care less.

I also cannot begin to fathom why when someone posts "Omg, I am soooooo nauseous, what about you?" it is so wrong for the response to be, "Hey, a lot of us are feeling nauseous 24/7 and check out X thread where we have been commiserating about it for 3 days." What is so wrong with that?? If that is "off-putting" and bothers someone, then I think they need to evaluate their sensitivity. I think those responses have actually been VERY nice. Just because someone responds that way doesn't mean that you are not allowed to post anything individually, it means that we are pointing to where they can see a lot of people are already talking about their issue.

Your logic is infringing on my freedom. Board police!

Image: https://media.giphy.com/media/868VVTZjeHvDG/giphy.gif

Seriously though... I've found out a lot about myself today for merely expressing an opinion which it seems many here agree with. I'm a stubborn, hormonal asshat. There I said it. Now lets have a gif party which is infinitely more enjoyable.

HollyGolightly09 · October 2016

thankfully said:

Other: Do not GAF, I just prefer lax enforcement of any and all "rules". The board police vibe bothers me more than any type of thread.

Yes. I take no issue with the organized thread (I'm a teacher... I love some organization!) I don't mind individual posts, either, as long as they aren't stupid or repetitive. I just don't feel the need for the "this should be posted under _____ instead" replies to individual threads. It does give me a bit of a "our way or the highway" vibe.

JAGinMI · October 2016

Sorry that Bill Cosby said it, but wow, it is so true.

abmommy15 · October 2016

mrlight said:

It seems like so far, most people want the structured posts, but are okay with individual posts. The biggest argument has been about the length of some of the threads. Would everyone be okay with a compromise of keeping all of the structured posts except for the "Weekly Random/Spam" thread and questions asked in that thread be made into individual posts? Then, if people duplicate topics that are on the first page, we flame them.

I don't think anyone has an issue with the existence of the structured posts. More that if someone posts their own thread outside of the structured post it should be ok as long as it isn't the 50th time it was posted or had no reason to be its own post. That distinction comes with time and will develop by itself without rules around it. Post your AW u/s just because in its own thread, probably going to get flamed. Had a tough appt and don't want your question or concern to get buried in a weekly thread then create your own. Have a fun gtky then post it, if it's a repeat people can either ignore or respond again.

BelhurstBride · October 2016

@Elyse1384, no, I haven't been on much since DD2 was born. It didn't take long to realize things have changed (cause it's effing dead) and that doesn't change my opinion. So you don't flame them. You answer the question or you ignore them.

And in case anyone hasn't realized it, the repeat posts are going to be made by people who aren't reading the rules anyway. So "no individual threads unless there isn't a repeat on the front page" won't apply to them anyway, and they'll just continue to be met with "you shouldn't post this here, you should've posted it there."

riverrainez · October 2016

OK but there's a big difference between "individual threads are OK as long as there's no similar thread on the first page" and "no individual threads unless it's an emergency requiring individualized attention." I'm on board with the former.

I find the chatter threads pretty boring at this point because it's so early and reading multiple pages describing random people's food aversions and nausea doesn't exactly make for compelling conversation. But I'm sure they'll get more fun and interesting as we get to know each other.

Individual threads are fine by me. Empty sac thread? I sit there currently and am glad to have a dedicated space to talk about it. Telling your boss thread? Cool, a conversation where working moms can talk about this specific situation we will all be encountering. And NO, I don't think we should start a weekly working moms chatter thread.

+1 to fewer rules and no board police. It's just old.

abmommy15 · October 2016

riverraine said:

OK but there's a big difference between "individual threads are OK as long as there's no similar thread on the first page" and "no individual threads unless it's an emergency requiring individualized attention." I'm on board with the former.

I find the chatter threads pretty boring at this point because it's so early and reading multiple pages describing random people's food aversions and nausea doesn't exactly make for compelling conversation. But I'm sure they'll get more fun and interesting as we get to know each other.

Individual threads are fine by me. Empty sac thread? I sit there currently and am glad to have a dedicated space to talk about it. Telling your boss thread? Cool, a conversation where working moms can talk about this specific situation we will all be encountering. And NO, I don't think we should start a weekly working moms chatter thread.

+1 to fewer rules and no board police. It's just old.

All of this^^^

Elyse1384 · October 2016

mrlight said:

It seems like so far, most people want the structured posts, but are okay with individual posts. The biggest argument has been about the length of some of the threads. Would everyone be okay with a compromise of keeping all of the structured posts except for the "Weekly Random/Spam" thread and questions asked in that thread be made into individual posts? Then, if people duplicate topics that are on the first page, we flame them.

I think most people are saying "Structured posts, but individual posts are OK if they are not redundant and/or entirely AW/troll/drive by in nature". As I said on previous threads, if someone receives information from bloodwork or an ultrasound and is concerned or wants to talk about it, that makes sense to start a thread for. I for one am not a fan of a group "ultrasound pics" thread only to them have 5 individual members post a random "my first ultrasound pic!" thread.

BelhurstBride · October 2016

There are several "what if I don't like the rules" posts in the rule post. I wonder where those ladies are? Posters we've already lost?

mamaraffe · October 2016

riverraine said:

OK but there's a big difference between "individual threads are OK as long as there's no similar thread on the first page" and "no individual threads unless it's an emergency requiring individualized attention." I'm on board with the former.

I find the chatter threads pretty boring at this point because it's so early and reading multiple pages describing random people's food aversions and nausea doesn't exactly make for compelling conversation. But I'm sure they'll get more fun and interesting as we get to know each other.

Individual threads are fine by me. Empty sac thread? I sit there currently and am glad to have a dedicated space to talk about it. Telling your boss thread? Cool, a conversation where working moms can talk about this specific situation we will all be encountering. And NO, I don't think we should start a weekly working moms chatter thread.

+1 to fewer rules and no board police. It's just old.

+1 more. I'm all for some weekly threads but I think individual threads give me something to read and enjoy. Makes people more personable. Do I think we need everyone making an individual post for ultrasounds, no. All for a structured thread for that. And my flames don't come out until the mucus pictures do.

Elyse1384 · October 2016

BelhurstBride said:

There are several "what if I don't like the rules" posts in the rule post. I wonder where those ladies are? Posters we've already lost?

Maybe they thought a blog would better suit their needs.

Image: https://a.dilcdn.com/bl/wp-content/uploads/sites/25/2015/11/Fozzie-rope-gif.gif

WorkingOnMyNightCheese · October 2016

riverraine said:

OK but there's a big difference between "individual threads are OK as long as there's no similar thread on the first page" and "no individual threads unless it's an emergency requiring individualized attention." I'm on board with the former.

I find the chatter threads pretty boring at this point because it's so early and reading multiple pages describing random people's food aversions and nausea doesn't exactly make for compelling conversation. But I'm sure they'll get more fun and interesting as we get to know each other.

Individual threads are fine by me. Empty sac thread? I sit there currently and am glad to have a dedicated space to talk about it. Telling your boss thread? Cool, a conversation where working moms can talk about this specific situation we will all be encountering. And NO, I don't think we should start a weekly working moms chatter thread.

+1 to fewer rules and no board police. It's just old.

I think I love you. All of this 100% ^^

Image: https://www.eonline.com/eol_images/Entire_Site/201519/rs_499x281-150209111403-tumblr_mqkmawkBwY1s91gg0o4_500.gif

Mashunya425 · October 2016

I'm all for letting this sort itself out, frankly I think the board is just fine besides how often this argument is coming up across all threads. People are starting organized threads and individual threads. Some are too long and some are duplicate questions/dear diaries. I just don't click on those.

I read and respond to what interests me, and don't let anything else bother me. Through natural course, threads that people like will remain at the top and others will die.

Assiram42 · October 2016

Mashunya425 said:

I'm all for letting this sort itself out, frankly I think the board is just fine besides how often this argument is coming up across all threads. People are starting organized threads and individual threads. Some are too long and some are duplicate questions/dear diaries. I just don't click on those.

I read and respond to what interests me, and don't let anything else bother me. Through natural course, threads that people like will remain at the top and others will die.

All. Of. This.

riverrainez · October 2016

But I love that we're having such a spirited debate about something so mundane. It makes me optimistic that we'll have some lively discussions in the future.

MotherofDragons · October 2016

@riverraine wanna chat about vaccines?! Things are definitely going to be interesting as we go along.

abmommy15 · October 2016

MotherofDragons said:

@riverraine wanna chat about vaccines?! Things are definitely going to be interesting as we go along.

Might as well start a circumcision thread while you are at it...

riverrainez · October 2016

Don't forget BF vs. FF and multiple baby showers.

Nah, those are all boring and predictable. I'm more about the random topics that get people fired up.

Wino0920 · October 2016

I have not read the rules. I also do not plan on it. I do not care about structure or no structure and if people duplicate stuff. I have to laugh if that's what gets people's panties in a twist. Calm down it will be ok!! I promise.

neludelu · October 2016

I think we should let the board sort itself out. No more rule police!

Assiram42 · October 2016

Wino0920 said:

I have not read the rules. I also do not plan on it. I do not care about structure or no structure and if people duplicate stuff. I have to laugh if that's what gets people's panties in a twist. Calm down it will be ok!! I promise.

Jendink · October 2016

I find it funny that based on the intro thread we have a lot of teachers and/or type A personalities in the group. That could be part of the down fall. I am a teacher as well,and LOVE organization, however, there is a time and place. I don't read the pregnancy chatter one as much (unless i have a lot of time) because t does get pretty long. I like that there is some organization, but the "board police" comments are not needed really.

abmommy15 · October 2016

riverraine said:

Don't forget BF vs. FF and multiple baby showers.

Nah, those are all boring and predictable. I'm more about the random topics that get people fired up.

On my last bmb we had this chick lose her mind because she received a formula sample and therefore formula companies were trying to sabotage her BF plan. Even boring topics can be pretty entertaining haha

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