Randoms 10/24

AverageAsh · October 2016

Come all ye weary...

AverageAsh · October 2016

We are moving this week. I am in a slight panic mode. Why do we own so much crap??

Gators&BoSox · October 2016

@AverageAsh DH and I were just talking about how much we have to purge before our next move... no part of that sounds fun to me

My random is that DH was talking to his mom yesterday and it looks like she won't be coming up this year for xmas!!! She's not as bad as some of the MILs I've seen on this board but bad enough for me to do the happy dance in my head over and over! She said she wants to come up in March after baby is born though...win some lose some I guess

Minger86 · October 2016

H's dad recently lost his job and, for a little extra income while he's searching for a new one, he's started driving for Uber. The amount of money he makes in just a few hours work is giving me big ideas for how we may be able to afford me quitting my job in March. My plan is to ask to go PT, but if they say no, it's such a relief to have a viable back-up option in mind. I just can't bring myself to get on board with putting my newborn in daycare full time.

datalover13 · October 2016

I forgot my phone at home today and I feel like I'm missing a limb. Apparently I'm one of THOSE people.

Liss_37 · October 2016

dh and I were invited to this couples Halloween party by a guy he met and became buddies with about a year ago. The guy is a total flake and constantly bails on plans with my husband and I really didn't want to commit and pay for tickets to this thing cause I don't trust he'll even show up. apparently they had to back out last year so insert eye roll here.

anyway my inlaws are busy and my mom can't babysit cause she's not well so I'm secretly doing a happy dance that we don't have to go, woop woop

KellyT22 · October 2016

DS's daycare is doing a halloween pageant (?) on Thursday night at 6:30pm. Kid goes to bed at that time. Sounds like a recipe for disaster.

@averageash moving is the worse! We'll be doing it again in the spring. I need to start purging now. Otherwise I just get too busy during the move and move the crap.

Happyhiker · October 2016

DH is convinced he's feeling our baby kicking when he touches me. I don't have the heart to tell him I'm barely feeling strong kicks at this point. It's sweet, so I'll let him think he's connecting with our little girl.

Minger86 · October 2016

@Happyhiker it's cute that he shows interest. When I was pregnant with DD, my H was so freaked out by the movement that he had no interest in feeling it. It made me angry... Like, dude, YOU put it there!

kjd291 · October 2016

minger86 said:

@Happyhiker it's cute that he shows interest. When I was pregnant with DD, my H was so freaked out by the movement that he had no interest in feeling it. It made me angry... Like, dude, YOU put it there!

Agreed! It's cute he cares!!

I keep trying to grab DHs hand when baby is moving, and he usually gets bored after trying to feel for half a second and says: "I'll feel the kicks after she's born."

npaulie · October 2016

Same here with DH. he's freaked out about movement, which surprises me. It's like, you know this is a thing... you know it's not actually some alien...

kiyamurph · October 2016

*Long post*

I didn't see a Monday B Fest thread so I'll just put this here. My MIL pisses me off. The thing is though is that she's so ignorant that she doesn't think about the words that are coming out of her mouth before she says them. I know that she doesn't intentionally set out to hurt people like a really psychotic MIL, but all the same, she's totally selfish and everything is about her. Anyway, she calls me yesterday for the first time in months and the only reason why she called was because she couldn't get a hold of my husband. His phone has been acting up and if someone calls him, he literally can't answer it. It rings and he can see who's calling him, but he can't swipe to answer. So when she called me yesterday, she doesn't say, hey how are you or anything like a normal person would. She says, "first of all, where's my son?" Like, WTF? Can I get a how are you doing, how are you feeling? Then after I tell her about his phone issues, only then does she ask how I am. Then, again, because everything is about her, instead of telling me how she's happy that we're welcoming another child, she says, "thank you for giving ME another grandchild because now I'll have 3" (my BIL is having a girl next month), because apparently it's a competition. And what the hell am I supposed to say to that? You're welcome? My MIL hated that she was the last of her siblings to have grandkids and she has 8 brothers and sisters. When I was pregnant with my son I told her that she's the last one because the majority of her nieces and nephews had babies in their teens, um, so yeah, the fact that her son actually waited to get married before having kids would mean that it would be a while before she became a grandparent. Then I had to listen to her drone on and on about how she just KNOWS we're having another boy (team green here) because "that's all she has." Erm, no lady, I'm having the baby here, not you, and if we are blessed with another son, not cursed as she puts it, then we'll still be happy. I had to remind her that her (golden child) oldest son is having a girl in a month, therefore fulfilling her wish to have a girl since that's what she's always wanted. She couldn't be happy with 2 boys, and growing up she let both her boys know just how much she wanted girls. I hate her for that. I'll see her next month when I go home to Ohio for a few days and she'll piss me off all over again when she gets upset that my son won't run into her arms like he's thrilled to see her. He sees her about 3 times/year so she's virtually a stranger and that thought somehow escapes her. Anyway, rant over. Thanks for letting me vent.

littleSkittle14 · October 2016

KellyT22 said:

DS's daycare is doing a halloween pageant (?) on Thursday night at 6:30pm. Kid goes to bed at that time. Sounds like a recipe for disaster.

@averageash moving is the worse! We'll be doing it again in the spring. I need to start purging now. Otherwise I just get too busy during the move and move the crap.

@KellyT22 that's the worst! My dd goes to bed around then too and is always so wound up if we have to keep her up late for some reason. you'd think they would've scheduled it earlier knowing little ones go to bed super early and start to get wild from tiredness! But hey good luck! Maybe all the kids will go cute from being tired-crazy and it'll be fun to watch the teachers try to manage them all

datalover13 · October 2016

@kiyamurph uh YIKES. She sounds horrible.

AandDM2014 · October 2016

@kiyamurph W. O. W.

Your MIL is.... There aren't even any words to describe it. Holy cow. I can't imagine how difficult it must be to have someone like that as a MIL, and I'm sorry.

disneybaby84 · October 2016

@kiyamurph. so sorry girl. I feel your pain. My MIL has already bought a pack and play for when " the baby's coming to visit". I told DH I am in no mood to plan traveling out to see her and it was a waste of her money.

Burrberrymum · October 2016

I'm kind of glad my SO isn't the only one that's weird about feeling baby moving around in there. Last night I told him I'm really starting to feel the baby and he said something along the lines that he doesn't like that and its weird and that he's not going to be interested in touching the baby when it's moving in my belly.. he said it in other words but I was so hurt. I was hurt with DD when he thought it was weird and "creepy" .. like how do you think I feel? Like alien vs predator type stuff going on in there. I thought he would come around the second time.

ShaunaT25 · October 2016

@AverageAsh we just moved on the weekend and now we are going through all of our crap and unpacking. It is EXHAUSTING. I forgot how much stuff we had, it has been in storage for almost 2 months. Thankfully our new house came equipped with a jacuzzi tub, because I could barely move by the end of the day Saturday.

kiyamurph · October 2016

@datalover13, @AandDM2014, @disneybaby84 The good thing is that I'm fortunate to have a husband that will put her in her place. I like to read the justnoMIL sub on Reddit so I can feel better about having a shitty MIL and there are too many times when the husband/SO doesn't stand up for the wife/girlfriend. That really sucks for them. There's no way I would've married my husband if he didn't stand up against her. Thankfully he has a pair, so it works. And also, we live in WA and she lives in OH, so we rarely have to see her in person. If we lived within driving distance though...I couldn't handle it. When I go home next month, it's just me and the toddler since my husband had work obligations. My MIL will be on my turf because my parents are putting together a big dinner at their house and my MIL is coming over. Between my mom and my aunts, MIL will be shut down quick should she start to be ridiculous.

bradleerick-2 · October 2016

@kiyamurph I'm so sorry! I feel like MILs, in general, say the weirdest shit. Like, even if they are a good MIL, they say really selfish stuff sometimes without even recognizing that it's selfish. I know it's so frustrating!!

Happyhiker · October 2016

minger86 said:

@Happyhiker it's cute that he shows interest. When I was pregnant with DD, my H was so freaked out by the movement that he had no interest in feeling it. It made me angry... Like, dude, YOU put it there!

Sorry your husband freaked out, ugh. Hope he's more used to the idea this time around! If he thinks it's weird, he should try feeling pregnant from our perspective, right?!

AverageAsh · October 2016

ShaunaT25 said:

@AverageAsh we just moved on the weekend and now we are going through all of our crap and unpacking. It is EXHAUSTING. I forgot how much stuff we had, it has been in storage for almost 2 months. Thankfully our new house came equipped with a jacuzzi tub, because I could barely move by the end of the day Saturday.

The jacuzzi tub is the only redeeming quality to moving!

littleSkittle14 · October 2016

disneybaby84 said:

@kiyamurph. so sorry girl. I feel your pain. My MIL has already bought a pack and play for when " the baby's coming to visit". I told DH I am in no mood to plan traveling out to see her and it was a waste of her money.

My mom did this. Except she turned my childhood bedroom into a nursery. Complete with a $300 crib. You know, in case we want to visit or leave our child with her long term? (She's crazy though so it's just a manipulation to get us to stay with her instead of my in-laws when we're in town, since they all live in the same town)

@kiyamurph I am sorry you're going through that. My brother is getting married in January and I already know my mom is going to be "that" MIL to my brothers fiancé. I'm not sure my future SIL knows what she's getting herself into...

mecoats · October 2016

@kiyamurph - girl we are in the same MIL situation. I'm so glad we both have hubbies that will stand up to their family. Here's a virtual non-alcoholic drink to cheers to our terrible MILs.

Difference is that we're 20 minutes away from mine. Lord help me when LO is here....

kiyamurph · October 2016

mecoats said:

@kiyamurph - girl we are in the same MIL situation. I'm so glad we both have hubbies that will stand up to their family. Here's a virtual non-alcoholic drink to cheers to our terrible MILs.

Difference is that we're 20 minutes away from mine. Lord help me when LO is here....

Ugh! I'm so sorry you're that close. I'm telling you, I'd lose my shit if we lived in the same city. Plus, my MIL is retired so she has plenty of time on her hands to come over unannounced, because that's exactly what she would try to do until my husband shut her down. She's a doozy.

kjd291 · October 2016

Ugh. MILs. Never mind Monday Bitchfest. We could just dub it Monday MILs and I'm sure it would fill up real fast.

Playing devils advocate: I am sure it's hard to have your baby boy grow up, get married, and dedicate his life to loving and caring for another woman. But boy oh boy does this MIL relationship seem to rarely workout. I hope my children in law will love me and I vow to treat them with respect and space.

My MIL is already a real speshil snowflake in her family... driven away anyone and everyone related to her, and is a master manipulator. Everything she says is mean and twisted. Having our first baby has just made our issues with her exadurated. ... this baby is due the day after MILs birthday, so you can imagine how this entire pregnancy and baby is all about her and "HER baby". I would love to have this kid super early, or be uncomfortable and huge for week(s) overdue just so I can avoid a life long reminder that this kid and her share a birthday week, God forbid the same day. Also to avoid her school vacation because she has threatened to come over every single day to "help" : aka hold "her baby" while I do the house work.

Gators&BoSox · October 2016

@kjd291 i agree that it's going to be hard when DS gets married and moves on but it sounds a lot better than the alternative of a grown man living in my basement too lol.

I hope baby is born like 2 weeks after MIL bday. I picture you like this if contractions start at an inconvenient time (except prettier

)

Image: https://i.giphy.com/xT5LMqvFRmRgFadkxq.gif

kjd291 · October 2016

Gators&BoSox said:

@kjd291 i agree that it's going to be hard when DS gets married and moves on but it sounds a lot better than the alternative of a grown man living in my basement too lol.

I hope baby is born like 2 weeks after MIL bday. I picture you like this if contractions start at an inconvenient time (except prettier )

Bahaha. YESSS. Exactly. Either that or... I'll just give birth to the baby myself in the bathtub and hide it and not tell anyone baby is in the world for an extra week ; )

dubcompanion · October 2016

I might just have to go and hug my MIL and thank her for being great.

The worst I can say about her is that she's really quiet and can be hard to read. I don't tend to express a lot of emotion with my ILs because they'll comment briefly on my accomplishment or news and then switch the topic. Like uh, okay. But then I'll hear from another family member of how proud they are of me/DH, so I'm trying to accept that they are just more reserved. Even DH had to accept this, because he spent years trying to win his parents' approval until he finally realized they just don't show a lot of excitement. It's probably why he married me - a person who dances in a circle just from eating a really yummy dessert. I wear my heart on my
sleeve and there's no hiding my feels, good
or bad.

@kjd291 I feel like MILs should be proud that their sons/daughters are capable of caring for their own family, rather than feel jealous or threatened by it. I thought the main goal of raising kids was turning them into independent humans?? But since your MIL sounds like a real piece of work anyway, I'm just glad most of your family realizes this and has carried on in spite of her issues!

mtmama2 · October 2016

littleSkittle14 said:
My brother is getting married in January and I already know my mom is going to be "that" MIL to my brothers fiancé. I'm not sure my future SIL knows what she's getting herself into...

Every time I read the comments about crazy MILs I always think "that's totally my mom" lol When my little brother eventually gets married that poor lovely bride will have soo many stories! I know she drives my husband crazy but I think it's a little different for guys, plus I shield him from a lot of it by doing stuff with her one-on-one.

julievdm12 · October 2016

So, I've been MIA lately.... literally haven't had time to be on. Out of town company, babysitting nieces, visiting family, family illness, applying for a mortgage, looking at houses..... it's nuts.
anyways, back for now. Hi again. Haha

@AverageAsh I haven't hardly started packing yet and I'm already thinking that...

Gators&BoSox said:

@kjd291 i agree that it's going to be hard when DS gets married and moves on but it sounds a lot better than the alternative of a grown man living in my basement too lol.

^^ i don't have a son but this made me lol

@dubcompanion
All of these horror stories made me think the same thing. My MIL was over today and I honestly just love her to pieces.

julievdm12 · October 2016

My random is that today I had a midwife appointment and this babe gave me quite the scare. She tried for like 10 mins to find baby's heartbeat with the Doppler and couldn't. I remained calm and collected until she pulled the wand away and said, "I think it's best we send you for an emergency ultrasound." Then I started to cry and be worried. Long story short, I met up with hubby and we went for an ultrasound and got to see the heartbeat as well as a very active babe. SO VERY THANKFUL for a healthy babe.

kjd291 · October 2016

dubcompanion said:

@kjd291 I feel like MILs should be proud that their sons/daughters are capable of caring for their own family, rather than feel jealous or threatened by it. I thought the main goal of raising kids was turning them into independent humans?? But since your MIL sounds like a real piece of work anyway, I'm just glad most of your family realizes this and has carried on in spite of her issues!

Yeah, one would certainly hope that's the goal!! I think instead of pride there is definitely envy and guilt. But I try my best to feel bad for the crazy and annoying instead of getting infuriated... but pregnancy hormones definitely don't help!

dubcompanion · October 2016

@kjd291 FWIW, I think you're holding your own very well, in spite of an extremely unstable MIL.

@julievdm12 I'm so glad LO is okay! I would cry too if the heartbeat wasn't detectable, especially this far along. I wonder if you have an anterior placenta? Either that or baby likes to play hide and seek!

serenity13 · October 2016

I'm with @dubcompanion feeling lucky I don't have a horrible MIL. Mine is in the later stage of Huntington's Disease and it's difficult for us to see her so frail and unable to talk or move much. She needs constant care and I have to admit, watching the way DH's dad has been there for her over the years was one of the reasons I wanted to marry DH because I knew he'd be just as loyal and devoted to me as his dad continues to be toward his mom. I hope she can hang on long enough to see her first grandbaby and I know the thought of being a grandmother & seeing us start a family is giving her strength & hope. I didn't know her before her health started deteriorating and although I certainly wish she didn't have HD I still feel like she's the best MIL I could've hoped for.

dubcompanion · October 2016

@serenity13 I'm so sorry your MIL is ill.

It's sweet that she's still got her heart and spirit this late in the disease and I hope she can meet her first grandbaby too. Prayers to you and your family!

librarymom917 · October 2016

If you think MIL's are bad.. try a grandmother in law who has only sons and favors her grandsons and think none of them ever do anything wrong. Like the men in the family get lots of Christmas gifts and big ones while the grandchildren get crap. She doesn't come to anything we invite her to for our daughter and didnt even come see her until 3 days after she was born. Dh's mom passed when he was a teenager but his grandma still talks bad about her. DHs dad is always treating my husband like an atm and even though we live a half mile from them my husband refuses to visit and ignores his dad 99% of the time.
Luckily GIL's younger sister is amazing and she actually helped me pick my wedding dress, threw my Bachelorette party , first baby shower and is throwing me a small brunch shower with 4 or 5 people this time.

kiyamurph · October 2016

@serenity13 I'm so so sorry to hear about your MIL. Hungtington's is such a heartbreaking disease. A former coworker of mine has it and she eventually had to be let go from her job because she couldn't function anymore. She's the sweetest lady too and it was awful to watch her break down through the years. I pray that your MIL is able to see her grandchild.

julievdm12 · October 2016

dubcompanion said:

@kjd291 FWIW, I think you're holding your own very well, in spite of an extremely unstable MIL.

@julievdm12 I'm so glad LO is okay! I would cry too if the heartbeat wasn't detectable, especially this far along. I wonder if you have an anterior placenta? Either that or baby likes to play hide and seek!

************stupid box******lol

Thats what I wondered in hindsight. they never noted my placenta location during my ultrasound initially or this time but my midwife said they should on my anatomy scan which I plan to have in a week or two. (Still just barely 18w)

julievdm12 · October 2016

@serenity13 so sorry to hear about your mother in law. That's so heartbreaking. Praying she gets to meet your little one!

Spartanrd4 · October 2016

@julievdm12 I wasn't told I had a anterior placenta until my anatomy scan. I never really had a problem hearing the heart beat on the doppler before that but depending on where the baby is- sometimes you hear a lot of background noise (like my heartbeat, the placenta) along with the baby. Glad everything ended up being okay, I would of freaked out too!

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