Thankfully i don't have quite this issue yet but my sister in law is due next week and her mom is coming tomorrow and her dad is coming when she goes into labor, and they're both staying for 6 weeks after the baby is born! AND her siblings (3) are coming too for the first few days. I feel soooooo bad for my brother. First kid and you can't even be home alone together to enjoy it in peace....
My mother in law is coming in April and staying at least a month but I'm breastfeeding and bringing baby to work with me so she can enjoy staying home alone.
@MrsDramaK I know the issue got resolved but why was your husband being so difficult? It's stressful as it to have a newborn and then to let the family stay as long as they want? Even if they do help out with cooking and stuff, I would still be on edge all the time. It's a wonder how older generations in my family had a blended family living situation back in the homeland.
@BlondePeanut that only makes your story so much more heartwarming!
Ugh I would be so stressed having just about anyone but DH there. The only exception being my cousin Crista, because I trust her, she wouldn't expect to be entertained, and knows just how to help and be amazing. My mom says she'd like to come visit sometime during spring, my dad still hasn't said anything about the pregnancy in general, let alone his intentions. I have no siblings, and DH has no relatives who would be able to visit. So I've got my fingers crossed that I can fulfill my plan of exclusively eating pre-portioned crock pot freezer meals on paper plates and living in pajamas for the first few weeks!
@MrsDramaK I know the issue got resolved but why was your husband being so difficult? It's stressful as it to have a newborn and then to let the family stay as long as they want? Even if they do help out with cooking and stuff, I would still be on edge all the time. It's a wonder how older generations in my family had a blended family living situation back in the homeland.
@BlondePeanut that only makes your story so much more heartwarming!
DH is all about "fair" and my parents live 90 minutes away, but have a second place 30 minutes away so we see them every other weekend. My siblings all live within the same radius. So DH is worried our kids won't feel as bonded with his family as they will with mine. In all likelihood they won't cause I see my siblings at least once every six weeks, we vacation together at least once a year, and my niece will be very close in age to our LO. So, DH wanted to feel like his family felt welcome whenever they want, but they live halfway across the country so if they come they need a place to stay. So it gets sticky.
@mrsdramak The scenario you ended up with is great! We lived across the country from all our family and had to tell them all to wait at least 2 weeks and they still harbor resentment over it. It was really nice for us though to have that privacy.
@MrsDramaK I get wanting to be "fair" but your husband's decree was unfair to you, him and your newborn baby. I'm glad his family is more reasonable.
My In Laws live 3 hrs away so my parents told my in laws they could stay with my parents when the baby comes so we don't have to host. I almost cried. Thank goodness.
@MrsDramaK wow that is a great scenario you ended up with! It is a tricky situation having one family closer. I don't know how I'm going to approach the subject with my parents. It's not that I don't want them to see the baby right away but I do not want them to stay over for the first 2 weeks at least because I want time for DH and I to bond with the baby, learn to breastfeed, etc... I feel like I'll be a bitch if I say don't come for 2 weeks even though obv DH's parents will be at the hospital the day he's born but I'd be just as much of a bitch if I say you can come visit at the hospital but when we go home you have to leave... It's really too far of a drive for them to just come for a day so I'm kind of stuck. Plus they are already hurt/pissed at me for not letting them visit this summer/fall. I have jokingly asked DH if we could just not tell them he was born for 2 weeks but I'm guessing they'd be just as pissed at that plus we probably couldn't pull that off.
Me: 33 | DH: 34 Married: October, 19, 2015 EDD 2/22/17 DS1 born on 3/2/17 EDD 3/8/20 DS2 born on 3/10/20 EDD 11/24/23 (Formerly Marriedhamstermom Feb ‘17)
Before I ever even thought of having a kid, I knew my mother would be there from the beginning and probably for as long as she likes.
Both our parents live across the country in the same city, so we typically only see them once a year at Christmas. H's mom is awesome but a bit more laid back. She has 3 boys. BIL had a baby last year and visited for about a week a few days after baby was born.
I am my mother's only child. My mother is a complete control freak. There just isn't any fighting it. H and I both know it and honestly just laugh about it. The good thing is, she loves to help, pay for things, clean and organize. I hate all of those things, so even though I KNOW she is going to drive me crazy, she is also going to make it much easier around the house.
So baby will be taken care of, house will be in order, just TBD if my mom and I both make it out alive. LOL
Me: 36, H: 37 FTM, 2 Furbabies married 03/17/07 lived in Houston, Austin, Los Angeles and NYC due: 2/15/17
I talked to DH about my concerns about not wanting my parents to visit and stay with us right away last night and I think he came up with a great solution. Thought I'd share it in case anyone else is in that sticky boat. Basically our plan is to ask them ahead of time before they can say anything to come and help me out when DH goes back to work. We're hoping that if we phrase it in a way that tells them this would be the most helpful that it will make them not see it as quite as much of an insult that we aren't letting them come see the baby in the first couple weeks. Anyways not sure how this will go over yet but hopefully it's not so bad.
Me: 33 | DH: 34 Married: October, 19, 2015 EDD 2/22/17 DS1 born on 3/2/17 EDD 3/8/20 DS2 born on 3/10/20 EDD 11/24/23 (Formerly Marriedhamstermom Feb ‘17)
Guys, I just wanted to let you know I'm probably going to be MIA for a while due to a family emergency. My little sister tried to commit suicide yesterday and I had to check her in to a mental health hospital last night. Needless to say, things are really hectic for me right now. Me and my Mammaw are the only ones here to deal with all the things that are unraveling. So I'm busy trying to get her bills taken care of, take care of her job/work schedule, get her dog placed somewhere temporarily, etc. It's a high stress situation and I'm trying to remain calm, but it's really hard. You guys are the best and I hope I can return soon.
@scifichick09 I'm so sorry you're faced with this I hope your sister is safe and can heal, please remember to take care of yourself too. Lots of (((hugs)))
@scifichick09 I am so sorry to hear that I will be thinking of you and your family! I know it's impossible not to stress, but just remember to also take care of yourself too while going through this situation
Oh my goodness @scifichick09, so sorry to hear that! I will be praying for all of you as you deal with this. Remember even if it's only a few minutes, do something to take care of you each day.
I'm so sorry @scifichick09. You, your sister, and your family will be in my thoughts. I really hope your sister can get the help she needs and you get some help in straightening out all her stuff. Remember to take care of yourself too!
Me: 33 | DH: 34 Married: October, 19, 2015 EDD 2/22/17 DS1 born on 3/2/17 EDD 3/8/20 DS2 born on 3/10/20 EDD 11/24/23 (Formerly Marriedhamstermom Feb ‘17)
Thanks everyone. My sister is doing ok, I'm just glad she is getting the help she needs. We were able to get the job situation taken care of, hoping to find a place for her dog by the end of the day. Once we've got that handled, things should calm down. Thank you for all the love and support.
@scifichick09 im so sorry you & your family are going through this. Hopefully your sister will become stronger & better with the right help. Please take care of yourself aswell. Xxx
@scifichick09 My heart goes out to your sister. I've been there and it's so tough. Your sister is blessed though, because she's got you for a sister and you seem very caring. I'll be praying for all of you. Hoping she recovers very soon and can get some long term coping methods. Hugs to you!!
@scifichick09 I am so sorry this happened and I'm glad your sister is okay and getting the help she needs. If you need to talk I've been there with my own sister. PM me anytime.
I'm just catching up today, but wanted to let you know I'll be thinking of you, your sister, and the family @scifichick09 ... I hope that as the day has been going on, that everything has calmed down a little and that your sister is stable.
@scifichick09 You're such a good sister for stepping up and helping your sister in this time of crisis. Remember to practice some self-care for yourself during this stressful time, even if it's just buying yourself a tea and sitting quietly for a few minutes.
Oh no, I'm so sorry to hear about your sister @scifichick09! You and your family are in my thoughts, hopefully with your support and the right kind of help she will recover quickly and not be in such a dark place. Hugs!
@scifichick09 I don't want to drag you down, but I just wanted you to know that I'm thinking about you and your family. I hope today is a better day for you!
Re: Family Matters 10/10/16
My mother in law is coming in April and staying at least a month but I'm breastfeeding and bringing baby to work with me so she can enjoy staying home alone.
@BlondePeanut that only makes your story so much more heartwarming!
TTC since January 2016
BFP - 3/12/16 - MC 4/5/16
BFP - 6/11/16
My In Laws live 3 hrs away so my parents told my in laws they could stay with my parents when the baby comes so we don't have to host. I almost cried. Thank goodness.
Married: October, 19, 2015
EDD 2/22/17
EDD 3/8/20
EDD 11/24/23
(Formerly Marriedhamstermom Feb ‘17)
Both our parents live across the country in the same city, so we typically only see them once a year at Christmas. H's mom is awesome but a bit more laid back. She has 3 boys. BIL had a baby last year and visited for about a week a few days after baby was born.
I am my mother's only child. My mother is a complete control freak. There just isn't any fighting it. H and I both know it and honestly just laugh about it. The good thing is, she loves to help, pay for things, clean and organize. I hate all of those things, so even though I KNOW she is going to drive me crazy, she is also going to make it much easier around the house.
So baby will be taken care of, house will be in order, just TBD if my mom and I both make it out alive. LOL
FTM, 2 Furbabies
married 03/17/07
lived in Houston, Austin, Los Angeles and NYC
due: 2/15/17
Married: October, 19, 2015
EDD 2/22/17
EDD 3/8/20
EDD 11/24/23
(Formerly Marriedhamstermom Feb ‘17)
ME: 25, DH: 27
TTC #1 since 09/2015
Miscarriage @ 10 wks 02/28/2016
BFP 05/28/2016!
TTC since January 2016
BFP - 3/12/16 - MC 4/5/16
BFP - 6/11/16
Married: October, 19, 2015
EDD 2/22/17
EDD 3/8/20
EDD 11/24/23
(Formerly Marriedhamstermom Feb ‘17)
Husband: 35
Married: June 2007
Son Max born 1/10/17
BFP #2: 10/5/17; EDD: 6/11/18
Me: 37 - H: 39
TTC#1: 01/2016
BFP: 06/18/2016 - EDD: 02/20/2017 - Born: 01/27/2017
ME: 25, DH: 27
TTC #1 since 09/2015
Miscarriage @ 10 wks 02/28/2016
BFP 05/28/2016!
First BFP: 12/16/13
EDD: 08/23/14
Baby BOY born: 08/29/14
You and your family are in my thoughts, hopefully with your support and the right kind of help she will recover quickly and not be in such a dark place. Hugs!