Shower dates?

Sazzical · October 2016

Has anyone planned ahead for the best time for your baby shower? December/January fits the usual time frame with my mid-March due date - but Christmas! If it were in December, I can't imagine anyone wants to buy more presents at the same time as their family...and January might be too close to the post-Christmas budgeting. Is mid to late January ok? Is early February too late, which would be 1 month from due date? I hate to cut it that close, but I definitely want to get maximum presents. I'm not afraid to admit that, this being my first baby. A cousin told me I should mail out the invites in late December so people can keep an eye out for after Christmas sales. Any thoughts?

catrb89 · October 2016

My mom booked a space for 1/15 since she teaches in FL and will have some time off for MLK day. I figure there will be some post-holiday sales that will make things easier. February would be a little late for my comfort.

gracie4400 · October 2016

I'm due March 3rd and I'm hoping to have my shower the weekend of January 14th or January 21st. I agree that it isn't the best time of year, but I'm also requesting that the invites go out around Thanksgiving so people have time to plan. I've always tried to be generous with all of the baby showers I've gone to so I'm hoping people will do the same for me regardless of the time of year!

jmacd22 · October 2016

Mines will be Jan 14 or 21 if I have one. Still debating that. I'm due early March. I agree with sending them right before xmas for deals.

Spartanrd4 · October 2016

I'm due March 7th and my mom was planning mine to be on January 21st.

Dinlove · October 2016

With my first pregnancy (due March as well) my mom threw it the first weekend of December and we had a great turn out. Regarding gifts people know that you are due and may already be looking for baby sales before shower announcements are even sent, and purchase stuff beforehand.

RunBooRun · October 2016

I've been told January. My mom was already planning on coming out here sometime in January since they aren't planning on making the trip for Christmas this year.

kap1988 · October 2016

I'm due the same day as @gracie4400 and we are discussing the 14th or 21st as well. I am not comfortable going any later. Actually those dates make me a little uncomfortable but there's really nothing else we can do.

JustAnotherUsername16 · October 2016

I'm having a "virtual" shower. My family is spread out all over the place, so it just makes more sense. And this way they can purchase and send on whatever timeline fits best for them. As a FTM, I appreciate the generosity and any support they can give.

triwellnessgirl · October 2016

I am due 3/9 and my baby shower will be 1/28. We actually just decided last night!

datalover13 · October 2016

With DS I was due at the end of February and I had one mid-December and one early January. Didn't have problems with either!

ngcsugirl1112 · October 2016

With Thanksgiving, Christmas, and my friends who are throwing the shower doing a full marathon at Disney World in January, we decided that mid to late January would be the best for us.

kap1988 · October 2016

I'm curious how far in advance people will send invites? What's the etiquette for a baby shower?

kjd291 · October 2016

Not having a shower here--but my two cents are that late January/early February sound ideal. Far enough after Christmas stress and business that people feel like going to a party and buying a gift. And IMO not at all too far into pregnancy. Anytime before 37 weeks is plenty early. --unless your a twin mom, or high risk-- I think people like seeing a mom who actually looks real pregnant at a baby shower

and it's fun to look back at big belly pics with friends and family

KellyT22 · October 2016

With my first I was not high risk or anything, but he was still born 5 weeks early, exactly one day before the shower. Give yourself at least two months.

FWIW most people have forgotten about Christmas by the second week in January.

kap1988 · October 2016

KellyT22 said:

With my first I was not high risk or anything, but he was still born 5 weeks early, exactly one day before the shower. Give yourself at least two months.

FWIW most people have forgotten about Christmas by the second week in January.

My sister's boys were 6 and 3 weeks early. The first one arrived about a week after the shower and we had it almost 2 months before her due date.

catybug820 · October 2016

I am not sure about a shower yet. My family is really pushing me that they want to do a shower (most likely in early February) I am super hesitant because it is my 2nd, they are only 2.5 years apart, and frankly I feel like people would judge me having another shower. My shower with my first was about a month after my mom passed away, so I think my aunts and cousins are really pushing to give me a happier shower than I had before. My new step-mom is fantastic, and this is the first grandbaby for her to be around for pregnancy/birth, so she and her mom & sister are really lobbying for a shower too. I don't know how much longer I can fight them off. Lol

I would honestly recommend at least 6 weeks before your date, because 1) babies come early sometimes, and 2) it gives you time after to figure out what you still need, and to get all the new things you get organized and put away without overwhelming yourself.

direwolfmini · October 2016

Twin mom here, planning for a shower on 1/15 when I will be 30 + 4. Anything later than that seemed like I would be cutting it kind of close, or that I would probably be insanely tired. I'm sure I'll have a substantial belly by then.

My SIL started planning this when I was 9 weeks... so I wouldn't be surprised if the invites go out around Halloween. She LOVES planning.

hisqueen78 · October 2016

I'm having 2 showers because I have people in two different states. I'm due at the end of March and both of mine will be in mid-February. Hopefully baby waits. My daughter was born 2 days before her shower and that wound up being the day we came home from the hospital.

Jilliants · October 2016

catybug820 said:

I am not sure about a shower yet. My family is really pushing me that they want to do a shower (most likely in early February) I am super hesitant because it is my 2nd, they are only 2.5 years apart, and frankly I feel like people would judge me having another shower. My shower with my first was about a month after my mom passed away, so I think my aunts and cousins are really pushing to give me a happier shower than I had before. My new step-mom is fantastic, and this is the first grandbaby for her to be around for pregnancy/birth, so she and her mom & sister are really lobbying for a shower too. I don't know how much longer I can fight them off. Lol

I would honestly recommend at least 6 weeks before your date, because 1) babies come early sometimes, and 2) it gives you time after to figure out what you still need, and to get all the new things you get organized and put away without overwhelming yourself.

I've seen really cute things on Pinterest for a 'sprinkle' as opposed to a full on shower. Maybe that's something you could suggest?

I'm due 3/21 and we're planning my shower for Feb. 18.

librarymom917 · October 2016

Last pregnancy I was due the end of feb (26) and had my shower early January, like the first weekend I think, we planned it out far enough that everyone knew to budget I guess.
Not having one this time but I'd probably do it late January or early February .

MamaD233 · October 2016

Jilliants said:

catybug820 said:

I am not sure about a shower yet. My family is really pushing me that they want to do a shower (most likely in early February) I am super hesitant because it is my 2nd, they are only 2.5 years apart, and frankly I feel like people would judge me having another shower. My shower with my first was about a month after my mom passed away, so I think my aunts and cousins are really pushing to give me a happier shower than I had before. My new step-mom is fantastic, and this is the first grandbaby for her to be around for pregnancy/birth, so she and her mom & sister are really lobbying for a shower too. I don't know how much longer I can fight them off. Lol

I would honestly recommend at least 6 weeks before your date, because 1) babies come early sometimes, and 2) it gives you time after to figure out what you still need, and to get all the new things you get organized and put away without overwhelming yourself.

I've seen really cute things on Pinterest for a 'sprinkle' as opposed to a full on shower. Maybe that's something you could suggest?

I'm due 3/21 and we're planning my shower for Feb. 18.

A sprinkle! That is too cute lol. @catybug820 u could just automatically uninvited anyone you sense would judge you and keep the guest list limited to the family and friends who genuinely care and want to celebrate you, your little one and motherhood.

sarahbobby · October 2016

I'm high risk for pre term labor. I'm thinking about having my shower after the baby arrives. January and February are really bad weather months where I live and I don't want to create stress worrying about the weather. I have a feeling I'm going to end up with at least two showers because my MIL likes to take control of everything and won't actually do what I want.

mecoats · October 2016

I'm due 3/15/17. I live about 3 hours from my family. So, I talked to my sister and my mom and we picked a shower date of 1/21/17...but we worry about snow, but we can't change it....so we'll just hope and pray! now that we have the date tentatively picked for the home shower, I can let my in-laws know that they can do what they want but not that weekend. I wish we were halfway and could do 1 shower, especially since (like @sarahbobby) my MIL like to take control of everything.

DrillSergeantCat · October 2016

Sazzical said:

Has anyone planned ahead for the best time for your baby shower? December/January fits the usual time frame with my mid-March due date - but Christmas! If it were in December, I can't imagine anyone wants to buy more presents at the same time as their family...and January might be too close to the post-Christmas budgeting. Is mid to late January ok? Is early February too late, which would be 1 month from due date? I hate to cut it that close, but I definitely want to get maximum presents. I'm not afraid to admit that, this being my first baby. A cousin told me I should mail out the invites in late December so people can keep an eye out for after Christmas sales. Any thoughts?

First, you shouldn't be planning/hosting your own shower. Second, 4-6 weeks before you're due is early enough for someone to host a shower for you. So early to mid-February would be fine. Third, I seriously hope you don't have any family or friends on here to see you say you "want to get maximum presents." It's not anyone's job but your own to provide everything your baby needs.

MoreLove4 · October 2016

I want to have a Superbowl theme Sparkle Party. Not a full out Baby Shower. I am planning mine for 2/4/2017 which is the Saturday before Superbowl is 2/5/17 I am due 3/15 doing a Gender Reveal also.

Gators&BoSox · October 2016

@morelove4 that is an amazing idea! your post made me google lol...this is our second so no shower but if I was having one I'd copy you

Image: https://us.v-cdn.net/5020794/uploads/editor/sd/fr0ubdneyo61.jpg

Image: https://us.v-cdn.net/5020794/uploads/editor/o3/148ohf5td74r.jpeg

PattersRN · October 2016

My sister is throwing me a shower in Jan in my hometown for longtime family friends. But for me it's more about spending time with them instead of getting presents. My registry is pretty slim because DH and I plan on buying most of what the baby needs by ourselves.

disneybaby84 · October 2016

I don't know when is good for me, I'm due March 1 and my best friend is going on a cruise the last week of January and I want her there.

Gators&BoSox · October 2016

I feel like any time after the first week of January is an optimum time. It gives people enough time to wind down from the holidays and they'll probably be out returning items any way and could shop last minute for the shower if they had to. The only thing that might be difficult is weather but that won't change in February or even March for many.

kfras · October 2016

I figured mid January would be ideal, but mom is throwing it early December instead. Wanted to not have it close to Christmas obviously

MamaD233 · October 2016

DrillSergeantCat said:

Sazzical said:

Has anyone planned ahead for the best time for your baby shower? December/January fits the usual time frame with my mid-March due date - but Christmas! If it were in December, I can't imagine anyone wants to buy more presents at the same time as their family...and January might be too close to the post-Christmas budgeting. Is mid to late January ok? Is early February too late, which would be 1 month from due date? I hate to cut it that close, but I definitely want to get maximum presents. I'm not afraid to admit that, this being my first baby. A cousin told me I should mail out the invites in late December so people can keep an eye out for after Christmas sales. Any thoughts?

First, you shouldn't be planning/hosting your own shower. Second, 4-6 weeks before you're due is early enough for someone to host a shower for you. So early to mid-February would be fine. Third, I seriously hope you don't have any family or friends on here to see you say you "want to get maximum presents." It's not anyone's job but your own to provide everything your baby needs.

Lord, the shaming lol+smh

People who don't want presents don't have showers. And I don't think a shower is going to "provide everything your baby needs" even with "maximum presents." Why do showers even exist if people didn't think new moms, esp FTMs, couldn't use help with the ridiculous cost of modern baby gear? Moms have 18+ post-shower years to honor their financial obligations to their children.

For that matter, why should anyone else take on the work of planning/hosting a shower, buying decorations and making refreshments, for anyone's baby since its the parents' job to provide everything...

My birthday is right after new year's so I understand how it feels to have your special day collide with Christmas. To admit not wanting to be shortchanged might sound ungrateful or greedy, but for someone giving birth (or born) in spring or summer, it's a non issue. i guess we should just be nobler people lol

jenny0228 · October 2016

The timing for me is super awkward. I think I am the one MAKING it awkward, but I'm turning 40 in February so I do not want to have a baby shower close to my 40th birthday. It just seems weird to be celebrating that milestone AND a baby. I know my mom wants to throw a shower, but I'm due March 28 and my bday is exactly one month earlier. I guess I would be ok having a small shower before my birthday, like earlier in Feb, but like many have said, I so appreciate the thought of it, but I hate being the center of attention! AND I'm worried people will think its inappropriate to throw a shower for someone my age. I'm really making it a thing in my head I think... I should probably get over it! Ha.

MoreLove4 · October 2016

Gators&BoSox
Awesome!!!! Thank You!!! I saw a few Gender Neutral posts on Pinterest that have peaked my interest. I want to incorporate a Gender Reveal during the party as well. This is baby #4 I have 3 sons already. Thank you. What do you think about this one?

Gators&BoSox · October 2016

i don't see a pic

MoreLove4 · October 2016

I will try to repost a different picture. Gators&BoSox

DrillSergeantCat · October 2016

MamaD233 said:
Lord, the shaming lol+smh You can shake your head all you want, but just think if this were your friend and you just happened across this post where she's basically saying she intends to use you to get absolutely everything she can out of you. Admit it, you'd feel a little something. If you're like me, you'll get her something anyway, but you're gonna feel used.

People who don't want presents don't have showers. And I don't think a shower is going to "provide everything your baby needs" even with "maximum presents." Why do showers even exist if people didn't think new moms, esp FTMs, couldn't use help with the ridiculous cost of modern baby gear? As a welcome to motherhood. They were never intended to set the mom-to-be up with everything she wants. And it is wants. Baby doesn't need that much; a place to sleep, a car seat, diapers, and clothes. Swings, swaddles, etc are comfort item that the mother and father want. Moms have 18+ post-shower years to honor their financial obligations to their children. Those financial obligations begin once the egg is fertilized, not after birth.

For that matter, why should anyone else take on the work of planning/hosting a shower, buying decorations and making refreshments, for anyone's baby since its the parents' job to provide everything... Because it's tacky AF to host a gift giving party in your own honor. This one isn't hard. Google "who should host a baby shower." It will never say it's appropriate to host your own.

My birthday is right after new year's so I understand how it feels to have your special day collide with Christmas. To admit not wanting to be shortchanged might sound ungrateful or greedy, but for someone giving birth (or born) in spring or summer, it's a non issue. i guess we should just be nobler people lol My birthday is in July. You don't think I got "short changed" every year because school was out and I didn't have a way to invite my classmates like the other kids who had birthdays throughout the year? And let's be honest here, this isn't the baby's birthday we're talking about. It's a shower. A shower is a gift from the hostess to the mom-to-be. A shower is not a necessity. The only people who should feel slighted by not getting enough gifts are petulant, spoiled children.

DrillSergeantCat · October 2016

jenny0228 said:

The timing for me is super awkward. I think I am the one MAKING it awkward, but I'm turning 40 in February so I do not want to have a baby shower close to my 40th birthday. It just seems weird to be celebrating that milestone AND a baby. I know my mom wants to throw a shower, but I'm due March 28 and my bday is exactly one month earlier. I guess I would be ok having a small shower before my birthday, like earlier in Feb, but like many have said, I so appreciate the thought of it, but I hate being the center of attention! AND I'm worried people will think its inappropriate to throw a shower for someone my age. I'm really making it a thing in my head I think... I should probably get over it! Ha.

It is absolutely not inappropriate! Your age has nothing to do with having a shower. Do your shower 6-8 weeks before baby is due that way, you're not super uncomfortable. If you go with that timeline, that puts you late January to mid-February. I don't think people will question the timing either. It's not like you planned to conceive in such a way that your shower would fall near your birthday.

Spartanrd4 · October 2016

DrillSergeantCat said:

MamaD233 said:
Lord, the shaming lol+smh You can shake your head all you want, but just think if this were your friend and you just happened across this post where she's basically saying she intends to use you to get absolutely everything she can out of you. Admit it, you'd feel a little something. If you're like me, you'll get her something anyway, but you're gonna feel used.

People who don't want presents don't have showers. And I don't think a shower is going to "provide everything your baby needs" even with "maximum presents." Why do showers even exist if people didn't think new moms, esp FTMs, couldn't use help with the ridiculous cost of modern baby gear? As a welcome to motherhood. They were never intended to set the mom-to-be up with everything she wants. And it is wants. Baby doesn't need that much; a place to sleep, a car seat, diapers, and clothes. Swings, swaddles, etc are comfort item that the mother and father want. Moms have 18+ post-shower years to honor their financial obligations to their children. Those financial obligations begin once the egg is fertilized, not after birth.

For that matter, why should anyone else take on the work of planning/hosting a shower, buying decorations and making refreshments, for anyone's baby since its the parents' job to provide everything... Because it's tacky AF to host a gift giving party in your own honor. This one isn't hard. Google "who should host a baby shower." It will never say it's appropriate to host your own.

My birthday is right after new year's so I understand how it feels to have your special day collide with Christmas. To admit not wanting to be shortchanged might sound ungrateful or greedy, but for someone giving birth (or born) in spring or summer, it's a non issue. i guess we should just be nobler people lol My birthday is in July. You don't think I got "short changed" every year because school was out and I didn't have a way to invite my classmates like the other kids who had birthdays throughout the year? And let's be honest here, this isn't the baby's birthday we're talking about. It's a shower. A shower is a gift from the hostess to the mom-to-be. A shower is not a necessity. The only people who should feel slighted by not getting enough gifts are petulant, spoiled children.

I agree- you should never throw a shower of any kind for yourself: Bridal shower, baby shower, etc etc. It's just not cool and very poor etiquette. I am having a shower- because my mother has been planning it since the pee stick was dry- and if I get presents that is great, I will appreciate anything I receive from anyone but I am accepting full responsibility as a future parent that I am probably going to buy a lot of the things for the baby myself. A shower is just nice as what @DrillSergeantCat said, to welcome you to Motherhood and help you in someway (whether with advice/support or gifts) to get you started as a FTM. The goal is not to get "maximum presents" that just sounds selfish to me.

MoreLove4 · October 2016

Uhm It is 2016. You can have a shower when you want, invite who you want, ask for all the gifts your heart desires. You CAN plan your own shower or wait for someone else to do it. Just be grateful that you are able to carry a Child and enjoy the company of others before the arrival of such a Blessing at a shower/sprinkle/ Sip and See. I have had 3 Baby Showers in the past 16 years I have 3 sons, I along with my Husband and 3 Sons will be Planning a Super Bowl Theme Sparkle for our baby due 3/15, because we have Super Bowl Parties every year. Who is making these rules you guys are living under.

Gators&BoSox if you have Pinterest look up Gender Reveal Super Bowl Party. There are so many ideas there.

DrillSergeantCat · October 2016

Spartanrd4 said:
I agree- you should never throw a shower of any kind for yourself: Bridal shower, baby shower, etc etc. It's just not cool and very poor etiquette. I am having a shower- because my mother has been planning it since the pee stick was dry- and if I get presents that is great, I will appreciate anything I receive from anyone but I am accepting full responsibility as a future parent that I am probably going to buy a lot of the things for the baby myself. A shower is just nice as what @DrillSergeantCat said, to welcome you to Motherhood and help you in someway (whether with advice/support or gifts) to get you started as a FTM. The goal is not to get "maximum presents" that just sounds selfish to me.

You will. People are going to want to give you the cute things and not necessarily things you really need. At my shower, I got mostly clothes. The only really practical gifts were sheets, towels, and a baby tub (that he hated and we used twice). I'm not complaining though! I love looking back at all the pictures of that cutie in the darling little outfits he got.

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