Hello, let me introduce myself first..
For the first 30 years of my life, everything was smooth and worry-free. I was my parents’ most beloved child, found my true love in college, and happily married him after graduation.
At work, I was my boss’s most valued employee. Whenever I was in charge of a project, colleagues would inevitably say, “Oh, then I’m totally at ease.” I was constantly named “Employee of the Year,” with generous bonuses every year.
Later, I started my own business. Within just three months, I had broken into the market and started making money. By the fifth month, I was earning twice my previous salary. Growth was steady month after month. Right when the business needed more hands, I serendipitously met an amazing partner, and the company reached a whole new level.
Really, it seemed like at every step, whatever I needed, a pair of hands would always place it right in front of me, just in time.
My Two Girls: Ellie & Mia
Meet Ellie, My Firstborn
In 2020, my husband and I decided to have a child. After trying for over a year, we finally got the news in 2021 that a little one was on the way. In 2022, we welcomed our first child, Ellie. She made me a mother.
She is utterly adorable—big eyes, rosy skin, chubby little hands. Every time I look at her, I can’t help but give her a kiss. She is pure joy, and I love her more each day.
But as a first-time mom, I faced unprecedented difficulties. The postpartum tearing wouldn’t heal, and the pain was excruciating. Clogged milk ducts made my breasts hard as rocks. The severe sleep deprivation… And what was even more crushing was that, with zero parenting experience, I was clueless when faced with her unexplained wailing, night terrors, refusal to nurse, constipation, diarrhea, fevers… I desperately searched online, longing for one accurate, truly useful answer!
It was during this time that I thought, once I make it through this “dark” path, I must leave a light on for other new moms.
And Then Came Mia
Ellie had just turned one when I got pregnant again. In 2024, we welcomed our second daughter, Mia.
Completely different from Ellie, Mia is a great eater and sleeper. Although she had her fussy moments in the first two months, starting almost from month three, she became super easygoing. She feeds on schedule, gradually sleeps through the night, loves her solid foods, and adapted quickly when I had to stop breastfeeding due to mastitis.
This made me realize just how vastly different babies can be! It made me even more determined to write about my experiences.
Why I Had to Start This Blog
The Catalyst: A Life Pivoted
After Mia was born, my business also began to decline sharply. I had no choice but to close it and become a full-time mom. My work no longer involves Excel and Word, but instead revolves around changing diapers, washing bottles, making baby food, and managing household chores…
This has been a monumental challenge for me. All my past achievements seem irrelevant now. Managing two young children has brought me a sense of frustration I’ve never known before.
The Daily Reality
They are always fighting over things. When one is in my arms, the other immediately demands to be held too. When I try to cook, Ellie wants me to read her a book. When I attempt to load the washing machine, Mia has a diaper blowout, and I must drop everything to change her…
By the time I finish all that, I see the cup of hot coffee on the table has gone cold again. And it’s not until evening that I remember, “Oh my goodness, the clothes are still in the hamper, unwashed!”
Of course, being a mom is filled with happiness, but that doesn’t negate how hard it is.
My Promise to You
Because I’ve walked this path myself, I won’t just tell you how joyful motherhood is, like many websites do. I want to share my real, unfiltered experiences so every new mom can find a “companion” here.
I want to tell you: you are not alone. What you’re going through, I’ve been there too. Your breakdowns, your helplessness, your moments of losing control—I’ve had them all. You don’t need to feel guilty. This is just a small, necessary stretch of the journey for every mom.
My Hope for This Space
I really want to share my parenting experiences—not just the warm, glowing moments, but to honestly document the pitfalls I’ve stumbled into, the tears I’ve shed, and the “survival wisdom” I’ve scraped together in utter exhaustion.
The Goal: A Mom’s Toolkit
I hope this blog becomes a “mom’s toolkit,” filled not with vague theories, but with:
- Practical Tips: Like how to quickly figure out why a baby is crying, tried-and-true methods for dealing with clogged ducts, or how to efficiently manage the daily grind with twins (or two under two) solo.
- Pitfall Avoidance Guides: Sharing the baby products I regret buying the most, and those “game-changer” parenting hacks. Letting you know which parenting anxieties you can let go of, and which principles are worth holding onto.
- A Community for Moms: I hope my stories connect me with more moms like you. We can cheer each other on in the comments, share our own tricks, turning the storms we face alone into a journey we walk together.
The Bigger Vision
My previous career taught me to analyze data, solve problems, and optimize processes. Now, I’m applying all those skills to this new “position” of Mom. I want to prove that a mom’s value is absolutely not confined to the home. The mindset, resilience, and creativity we built in our careers can shine just as brightly—perhaps even brighter—in this more complex, long-term “project” of raising humans, and can even be transformed into a force that helps others.
My hope is simple: that every mom who opens this blog can let out a sigh of relief and say, “So it’s not just me.” Then, she can find a bit of practical info, a dose of comforting solidarity, and return to her sweet, chaotic mom-life with a little more confidence and a little less weight on her shoulders.
This road? Let’s walk it together.
Re: September 2016 Birth Announcements!!!
Labor started Saturday night at around 8-8:30pm. Regular contractions which gradually got more intense. I called my OB after alerting my DH and walking around the house to see if the timing was right. She said I should see if I could sleep before going into the hospital. DH and I were trying to watch a movie and I couldn't even lay or sit comfortably on the couch so we figured it was time. Called back again and the OB said go to the hospital. So we made our way there and arrived just before midnight. I got settled and checked and was already at 5cm. We labored naturally for several hours until I got to 8-9cm. The contractions got so intense that it was hard to make it through. I opted to get an epidural at that point but it took over half an hour for him to get to me as there were others before me. Eek. That was not a pleasant experience going through the epidural process itself and all while going through tough contractions. But we did it and I got a lot of relief which was great. I continued to labor to try to move the baby down further. Soon after I was totally effaced and at 10cm. A few hours went by and baby still was far up and not turned. We got to the point where we were going to push. I pushed for about an hour with little success as her little head was stuck on my pelvis and kind of bent back. The OB decided to use the vacuum to get her closer and then she turned her around manually. Once she did that, two pushes and she was out! I couldn't believe it. I made it without any terrible tearing (1st degree tear and interior)! We enjoyed some skin to skin time before I was able to have a shower and she was taken for testing etc. that shower was the best. We went over to the mom and baby unit and got settled there. Everyone is doing well. We get to leave tomorrow morning before lunch. We couldn't be happier!
Molly is doing wonderfully - she passes all of her tests. She's breastfeeding with a shield currently (my nipples are stubborn and flat - boo!) but is doing well. She loves being swaddled!
Im recovering well so far. Just exhausted since we labored from about 8-8:30 until 10:45am the next day and then were up until 9pm that night. I've got some discomfort and swelling / water retention. But otherwise we are all good. We couldn't be more in love!!
Labour started about 24 hours before but wasn't super intense. Midwife checked me out at 6 pm after hitting the 5-1-1 point and I was 3 cm, thinned out, but not much happening for what were now pretty intense contractions. She went home, convinced it wasn't happening that night. Called her back for 2 am, intense, tiring contractions still going on (got more intense at 11:30 and again at 1:30). Was 6 cm and disappointed to be only that far. She still wasn't convinced it was happening yet. By 6 am the midwife had unpacked her kit, my firstborn (who was sleeping in the basement with grandma) was up and checking in, by 7 I was 8 cm and grandma had gotten him up and out of the house for breakfast, by about 7:30 the midwife called her colleague to come and I started pushing, by 7:51 baby and texting grandma and big brother that they could come home and meet baby! Second midwife totally missed it... Which I think happened last time, too!
Reed is breastfeeding like a champ, at least with the colostrum. Roman had both a lip and tongue tie and it looks like that was the reason I wasn't successful with him. Will see if my milk comes in.
November Siggy Challenge: Selfie Fails
Hidden for the sake of your eyes!
Sorry this is long and I am super late with this post but Eleanor (Ellie) Laura was born on 8/16/16 at 4:25 pm at 36w3d gestational age. It was a whirlwind of events leading up to her arrival. Around 31 or 32 weeks, my blood pressure started to elevate. I had repeated blood pressure checks as the weeks went on and my blood pressure hovered around being borderline high. I had a prenatal appointment at 35w6d where my doctor told me that I officially had gestational hypertension. I was sent home with a blood pressure kit to monitor my blood pressure and told to call if my blood pressure was above their parameters and I experienced major swelling, pain, and/or vision problems.
The next night, I took my blood pressure and it was above their parameters. I already had extreme swelling in my feet but I had been told that it was normal even though I didn’t think it was. I called in to Labor & Delivery as instructed and they had me come in to be checked. My husband, who works for the same hospital, was certain we would only be there a few hours and be sent home. Instead they admitted me to monitor my blood pressure and determine if I had mild or severe pre-eclampsia and I ended up staying for the weekend. We were freaking out at first because the nurse and doctor started talking about inducing me and delivering that weekend but my labs came back okay so I was sent home that Sunday.
The next day, Monday, I went into work (I am a teacher and I had planned to work until my due date, 9/9/16) for our first staff day and I was feeling uncomfortable. I kept having this tightening feeling, which I assumed were contractions and had some difficulty breathing but I thought and was told it was normal as I approached my due date. Later that night, in addition to the tightening feeling and difficulty breathing, I started to feel pain under my breastbone and on top of that, my blood pressure was off the charts. I called in to the hospital at 2am and was told that it was difficult for them to evaluate over the phone whether it was heartburn or something else based on what I told them so the advice nurse suggested that I try and take some Tums and sleep propped up but if the pain didn’t stop or got worse, then I could call back and they would have me come in. I was barely able to sleep for about 3 hours before I couldn’t take the pain anymore and called back.
When we got to the hospital, I was admitted immediately. I had my blood drawn and I was given fentanyl for the pain (only lasted about an hour). The doctor came back about 20 minutes later to go over the results of my blood work and she told us that my liver enzyme numbers were really high and that I had pre-eclampsia/HELLP syndrome and the only way I would feel better was to deliver the baby. She said that they were definitely going to induce but a c-section was also possible. I had to repeat the blood work just so they could confirm. At that point, I was still in pain and when she mentioned the possibility of a c-section, I thought, “there’s no way I want to do otherwise.” I was so relieved when she said that they were going to do a c-section because I was already in pain and discomfort and I was not about to sit there and go through the induction process just to be in more pain.
We did not imagine it going like this but we’re just happy that she was born healthy at 5lbs, 9oz even though she was 3 and a half weeks early.
● IUI #5: BFP! 12/29/15, 11dpiui
1/1/2016 Beta #1 HCG: 58 Progesterone: 49.5
1/3/2016 Beta #2 HCG:154 Progesterone: 55.9
1/20/16 Ultrasound #1 6w3d, HB: 114 bpm
1/29/16 Ultrasound #2 8w0d, HB: 171 bpm
Hey all! Baby Haddie arrived on 10/4 at 4:09 am. It was a whirlwind ride. Everyone is happy and healthy. She weighed 8lbs. 13oz. I was having contractions yesterday starting about 4 minutes a part. I started timing as soon as they started to pick up around 330. Went to L&D to be checked and I was only 2.5 cm and sent home. I went home, slept for two hours and woke up to stronger contractions about three minutes a part at about midnight. By 2 am they were two minutes a part and I writhing in pain, then my water started leaking. Called to tell LD and I was on my way. Got there and checked and I was 4 cm and I yelled for an epi to literally everyone hah! After 45 minutes or so I was upstairs in my room getting an epi as I was hunched over my water broke and I felt the contractions change but figured I couldn't possibly be fully dilated. But every time I had a contraction I now felt enormous pressure and my hips would twitch. My midwife noticed the change in my face and I just said I think you better check me. The epi was finally set and started when and they laid me down to check me and I just heard my midwife say oh well you're 9 cm now. Let me check her position. And I just thought um WTF? Then my midwife said oh well there she is, there's her head. Well sweetie push when you feel like pushing. Three pushes later my baby girl was crying and on my chest! Kind of the craziest experience of my life but so glad she's here finally!