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December 2016 Moms
dmontgo
member
Monday Bitchfest 9.19
dmontgo
member
I didn't see it posted today, and I wanna bitch!
Re: Monday Bitchfest 9.19
TTC since 6/13
Diagnosed w/ PCOS 4/9/15 - R/E recommended lifestyle change
BFP 4/10/16 - DS born 12/16/2016
SURPRISE! BFP 3/8/18
...my car is dead. Won't start. Pretty sure it's the battery. It's an easy fix but I'm just pissed. DH is on break from school until 8pm when he has a night class, so he's coming to pick me up. It's just inconvenient since we don't have decent public transportation here, and I don't want to pay for a new battery even though they aren't incredibly expensive.
So inside I'm throwing a toddler tantrum, complete with feet-kicking and throwing myself on the ground. Wah.
I have no less than 4 meetings in the last week where we talk about the same g-damn thing. It is like groundhog day. Every time we come to a solution, we have to rehash the conversation 24 hours later. After I dropped everything to finish something in a completely unreasonable timeline, they put a meeting on the calendar this morning to discuss how we need to do the work I already did? Glad I rushed to get that done to meet their deadline and they haven't done anything with it yet.
My management already hired my replacement but is now freaking out because we don't have enough hours to cover both of us in my project's budget for more than a few weeks. Um, hey guys, I'm here until December. They need to find something for her to do (I've also volunteered to do work on other projects to free up budget hours), but my boss wants me to work some magic and/or figure something out? Um, you can't force me to take leave to free up hours and I've already told you I'm not because I need that to, you know, GET PAID while on maternity leave. I have our hours for the next fiscal year forecast as accurately as possible and our budget allocated down to pennies left for the year so there just aren't hours left. What magic, exactly, would you like me to work out?
And my ex. Don't even get me started. He's about to feel my wrath. After everything that has happened that I've posted about in the last few weeks, my sweet boy got in the car last night after spending the weekend with his dad and burst into tears. After some prodding, he told us that, after leaving him with his aunt/cousin the night before, he feels like "his dad doesn't even like him because he doesn't spend time with [him]." Yeah, it's about to go down.
Very substantial bitches today, ladies. Throat punches to all who annoy you today!
My bitch is work...and it's stupid. I had a pretty laid back week on the calendar. A couple of meetings, but mostly getting the chance to do some continuing education and professional development. Was just notified in a meeting of a mandatory conference for the next two days - four, disjointed hours a day. It's a national teleconference, but we have to all be at the same site to conference in so we don't destroy the bandwith of the program. And the site we have to go to NEVER has any parking unless you get there at 7am, literally. Oh, and I don't have office space there, so I have nowhere to go during the ridiculous breaks in this program schedule. Like the thing is scheduled from 11 to 1 and 2 to 4 for the next two days. Way to make it inconvenient! You couldn't possibly just shove all those hours in the morning or afternoon?! That would be too convenient for your employees.
Baby #1
Baby #2
~04/19/16 EDD 12/26/16~
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#2 - I keep reminding my boss of my upcoming leave and she just keeps piling work on my plate. I've tried to tell her on several different occasions that she is generating more work for the people who are covering me while I'm gone (likely colleagues because she hasn't yet actually found a replacement), because, at this point, these things can't be wrapped up before I'm gone, and then my colleagues are going to have to do their work and mine, and try to jump in in the middle instead of just starting on day 1. She seems totally oblivious to the fact that if she starts me on a project in mid-Oct, it's pretty likely I'll only be around for 1 month after that (I'm due 12/1 and Thanksgiving is the week before). It's really frustrating to me because #1 - I don't have the energy to deal with new projects right now and #2 - I feel like I keep trying to minimize the burden of work left for colleagues and she is not helping me do that.
My Wedding Bio!
I am now 3 hrs away at the sister hospital, but sic-ed(sp?) H on them and my dad and his lawyer called the hospital I'm using now- they are the 'in charge' one- and finally shit is getting done.
It just shouldn't take 8 weeks total to get 2 pages and 1 box checked when you are dealing with work/pay/benefits for a client. And causing anxiety + potential loss of employment because it took so long.
Formerly known as Kate08young
August '18 Siggy April Showers:
Married: 7/22/14
Baby L: 8/4/2015 August 2015 Moms
Baby E: 11/18/2016 December 2016 Moms
TTC #3 08/2017 BFP 11/27/2017.
Twin B lost 11/22/2017, Twin A doing well.
My BF is my stupid insurance deductible!! I totally forgot my plan started in July. So I am getting bills after bills and I am like WTF!! I called my insurance and they were like "yeah your plan started in July you have $600 to go till you meet your deductible." FANTASTIC!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
TTC since June 2015
September Football Siggy
DH is a medic so he's more understanding and educated about the body than most, but every once in a while he'll ask if the sex was good because I didn't orgasm--I think our pleasure in their mind is a measurement of their manliness. Bottom line, he's being a brat and you are not a bad wife. If he wants to pout, let him.
@Kate08Young that's a total nightmare you're dealing with. I'm sorry you've had such a hard time getting everything you need.
My BF for is for random strangers making tons of comments. I guess now that it's very clear just by looking at me that I'm pregnant people feel like they can comment?
Yesterday, I was getting off a plane and there were a couple ground crew people starting to clean the front rows of the plane. As I walked past, I heard a man's voice call out "7 months!" He was totally just shouting out his guess for how far along I was! I decided I was not going to acknowledge him, and I heard him say to his friend, "I think I was pretty close." Well congratulations, sir, you just made a pregnant lady feel huge because I'm only six months...
I'm sure things will progress into random unsolicited belly touching soon, and I'll miss the stage where people were only commenting
DS is sick again, which means that I'm sick. We both went to the docs today. He's got an upper respiratory infection and ear infection and I have bronchitis - which is great because I thought it was pneumonia . I'm tired of this sickness shit. Being in 3rd tri with twins is hard without all these extra issues.
But he's had a cold for five days and today he calls me from work saying he's feeling so much worse. So I order him to go to urgent care. He does and of course he has a bad sinus infection. He comes home and goes straight to bed at 6pm while I feed the kids then go out to pick up his antibiotic and grocery shop (with both kids). I come home, get him up to take the meds, feed the kids a snack then put them to bed and he's heading back to bed just now. He asks if I'm coming to bed and I say no. I have to do dishes and laundry. He asks for some pity sex for being sick. What?! You're actually pretty ill, can't help out with the kids (which is understandable)but feel good enough to get busy? Ugh. Maybe I'm being my irritable third trimester self but I just am not in the mood after a long day taking care of two kids and a sick husband. And I don't want your nasty germs either dude!!!!
Then they deliver our nursery furniture half an hour later. I really wanted to assemble it to tonight. FI knows that. I can't leave stuff like that alone. I need to get it done immediately. He's refusing to bring the boxes from the garage to the nursery. He doesn't feel like it. He's worked too hard this week. We've both worked hard! In fact, I unpacked/assembled all weekend while he played computer games. I asked him very nicely if he could just please bring in the smaller (crib) box so I can at least start working on one piece. No. I asked when he could. Tomorrow? Next week? Answer: When I feel like it.
So now I hide in the bedroom because I will go off on him soon if we're in the same room. I've done absolutely nothing wrong. And he's being rude and mean like I've committed some crime by being able able to screw on a bolt that he couldn't. I'd be pissed any day, but add in pregnancy hormones and I'm a wreck
@DiFazette - ack!!! feel better!
@ashleaf2018 - this is a seriously unfair hand you've been dealt. You have kept such a good attitude about it.
@Kate08Young - at some point negligence like that should be criminal.
@BenNSarah - your husband gets a big huge NOPE from me.
And now my BF. I am realizing it's at myself. At book club the other day I was doing my usual - low level complaining when asked how I feel "oh everything's going healthy and well but pregnancy is just not my thing. I'm so uncomfortable blah blah" and one of the girls has been undergoing fertility treatments the last year. She's also the type to not let anything slide so she jumped on me about how lucky I am and how hard it's been for her. I immediately snapped out of complain mode, agreed that I'm lucky, and moved to sympathetic friend mode... but I've felt kind of pissy that she made me feel like I'd put my foot in my mouth. We're both having our different experiences, we don't have to have them reflect on one another... But I guess I actually just do feel bad because, really, I'm incredibly fortunate. And yes I don't enjoy pregnancy but I need to shut up about it. That's my problem. I am super grateful that it's all worked out so well for DH and I and everyone is healthy and everything is progressing well. I just drafted an email to her apologizing but then deleted it. I feel like when struggling with fertility issues, someone pregnant or with a newborn is just not the best company and it's probably better to lay low for now. We're not super close or anything.
So yea, BF at me. Stop taking things for granted. Stop complaining. Thank my lucky stars.
For me personally, I never felt that just because I was struggling with infertility meant that other people's experiences were invalid or "less" than mine. I am very outspoken with friends when they act a fool, but for the most part I kept my struggle to myself because I didn't want awkward pity and I felt embarassed. I admit that when other friends told me they were pregnant in the past--I would get angry. And sad. And angry. I never told them though because why should I rain on someone's parade just because I am hurt? It's not like they did it to spite me, although I have thought that unfairly at times. But it's complex.
Now that I'm pregnant, I am still in shock about how hard it is. I sometimes feel bad when I complain, but how is my experience now any less than what I experienced before? It's not--it's just different.
Anyway, you apologized and I don't think you did anything wrong. She is obviously hurting and jealous (been there), and it has nothing to do with you, but her experiences. If you had been very insensitive towards her like "It will happen at the right time" or "Stop trying and it will happen!" then yeah...you'd deserve a butt-chewing. But seriously...don't beat yourself up.
I hope your friend is able to have a baby of her own, but I hope that if she does not enjoy being pregnant that no one gives her a slap on the wrist for it. Pregnancy is rough, it's an awful feeling to try so hard and still not get pregnant but it also sucks to finally get that pregnancy and that baby that you worked so hard for and then hate the experience of actually being pregnant.
My philosophy on most things is that if someone feels one way about anything, they are justified to have those feelings. If you hate being pregnant, it doesn't mean you aren't appreciative of it and your kids...it just means you hate ring pregnant...for whatever reason. That's your feelings and totally justified. It's not a contest of who's struggles are greater. Everyone struggles and it sucks. You shouldn't have to filter or change your feelings because someone else is struggling differently. A crisis for me may be nbd to 90% of others, however, it's still a crisis for me.
I don't understand some people's struggles but I don't put them down because "my crisis is worse than yours".
And random: my boss's today looked at my bump when the kid decided to move a lot and he kinda freaked out. It's been 18 years since his wife had a baby so I think he forgot that they move. He asked if I was ok and needed to sit because after seeing my belly move so much he needed to sit down lol.
Also, your emotions and experiences are just as valid as anyone else's. ******this is just a comparison, because it's the best I can do putting it into words***** It's like looking at a couple who is 10 yrs older than you/has a better job than you. You can be jealous of their house/cars/toys/trips/kids/ whatever yet still be grateful for what you have. BUT you only see the snapshot of their life. Maybe one of the kids can't read, one of them can't drive, they have the big house to hold all of a the crap the in laws dump on them or to get away from each other/sleep in separate rooms, they travel to get away from home/each other, ect. Just because something is 'picture perfect' doesn't mean it's as perfect on the other side of the camera.
Having different feelings or enjoying something less does not, in anyway, make you less valid. It just means you have different struggles behind the camera than someone else.
Formerly known as Kate08young
August '18 Siggy April Showers:
Married: 7/22/14
Baby L: 8/4/2015 August 2015 Moms
Baby E: 11/18/2016 December 2016 Moms
TTC #3 08/2017 BFP 11/27/2017.
Twin B lost 11/22/2017, Twin A doing well.
I have too many little BFs, it feels stupid.
My stomach feels like it is splitting. It aches when I do anything, which means all day.
My sister, and best friend, has been seeing this great guy since January. We all approve big time, they moved in together and are serious. Sister has 3 children, the eldest (16) has a different dad (she was a young mom). Her man has no children, and wants one, he's a great dad to her kids already. She just got her IUD out and her and her man are going to TTC. I'm behind her, she's an adult and can make her own decisions. The problem is that everyone else in the family is going to think she's insane. Especially my mom. So sister sends me a message today asking me to please tell my mom that sister is going to TTC. Thanks. No. I love you. But no.
I am almost over my damn yeast infection that the glucose test gave me. Almost. Damn glucose test.
Next! I was late to the dentist today, it takes 10 minutes to get there, 20 in traffic. So I leave 20 minutes before appointment, and traffic was beyond anything I've ever seen. I used google maps to go the least traffic way. It took me 40 minutes! Then they rushed my filling instead of just rescheduling. The numbing stuff hadn't even kicked in and I had to stop them drilling. Then they're like 'all done with drilling, just going to fill!'. Great, so my face becomes numb finally, as I'm leaving.
And then apparently because I don't have a paying job, I just sit on my butt all day. The dental assistant is like 'are you going home to relax now?'. Chick, seriously? I have 2 kids, just had a family of 5 stay with us over the weekend, taking care of a 2 yr old for 3 days/nights straight this week, it's soccer season, and have a baby to prepare for: my house needs a hazmat team. Which is me. I only relax at night when my back gives out from working my butt off all day.
One day I will be there, one day.
My BF is my admin team. My school has some challenging kids, and coming up from 2nd grade (I teach 3rd) the kids are always the most rough because the k-2 teachers don't expect a lot of sitting, hand raising, etc. With this class though, I dunno how the 2nd grade teacher did it. I have students throwing backpacks in the air and punching them to the ground during circle time, other kids who refuse to do ANY work at all and lay under desks in my room until the end of the day...and the admin's position? Well they are clearly not confident in their skills and your teaching doesn't reflect their level of need. WAIT. It's MY FAULT? There is a girl in the back of the room who doesn't want to come to the carpet, we have literally done nothing academic yet, she just doesn't want to do it, so she starts loudly yelling every time I start a sentence. Yep. That's my teaching not differentiating well enough.
Seriously..two more months until I'm out. Sigh.
Just wondering because a few friends of mine were very similar to that but then complained a lot during their pregnancy. No one likes puking for months, hurting all the time, not sleeping well, peeing their pants...but most people think Its worth it...some crazy folks do it again. Even though they may think they will only cherish every moment of pregnancy after struggling so much, reality hits on the 10th trip to the toilet to puke that sometimes, for some people, pregnancy really just sucks. And complaining doesn't mean we aren't appreciative...it just means today we are having a hard time.
@ashleaf2018 - I'm sorry you had to reschedule the test, but your health and your baby's health and wellbeing really do come first.
@slartybartfast - I think she was just being sensitive. What are you supposed to do? Constantly lie about how you're feeling?
my BF for yesterday and today is the fact that I have nothing to wear to work that is cool enough to teach for 6 hours in a not air-conditioned studio and is also rain-appropriate. Also, every 10 minutes baby boy pushes against my right rib and he seems to only be getting stronger and stronger. This has been his position for the past 2 weeks, but fingers crossed he moves to a new spot since I'm only 29 weeks?
TTC #2: Jan 2019
DS: 2.5 yo
EDD: 12/2/16 DOB: 10/22/16
(Previously MBS2016 Dec 2016 board
TTC #2: Jan 2019
DS: 2.5 yo
EDD: 12/2/16 DOB: 10/22/16
(Previously MBS2016 Dec 2016 board
TTC since 6/13
Diagnosed w/ PCOS 4/9/15 - R/E recommended lifestyle change
BFP 4/10/16 - DS born 12/16/2016
SURPRISE! BFP 3/8/18