May 2017 Moms

Can we talk daycare?

I was talking to one of my friends who is expecting his first baby in October.  He freaked me out by telling me that infant daycare is so difficult to get in.  He said that they didn't get their first choice because it was full.  He suggested that DH and I get on a waiting list and pick a daycare before I'm pregnant.  Obviously he doesn't know. 

So I called a home daycare that a lot of the teachers use in my district.  She put my name on the waiting list. 

I called several center based daycares.  I didn't get the "tuition" for all of them but one of them was like $1850/month for full time!!!!  

Just wondering what your plans are and how much daycare is where you live.  Massachusetts is outrageous.  

DH may need to work a different shift!
***TW***
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Re: Can we talk daycare?

  • I stayed home for a bit, so I don't exactly know much about the waiting list thing for infants. But they both went to daycare when my son was 4 and my daughter 2. It was very easy to find an opening for them, BUT there were only 2 centers in town that I found acceptable (I literally left one center crying). Luckily, one of my top picks was only 50 feet from my school where I teach. 

    I payed $500 a month per child, plus $50 for my daughter to take both ballet and gymnastics at the church during daycare hours. 

    Now my son is in kindergarten, so I am down to only one daycare bill. However, he goes to a private catholic school, but it is still only $600. $1850 does sound like way too much! I could enroll 3 kids for that at their current center!
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  • Yeah, unfortunately the going rate is about $460 a week here : (

    One day care I spoke to has no openings until May 2017 so she assured me that I'm not crazy for calling and trying to research things.

    I did feel silly when people asked when my due date is.
    ***TW***
    Me: 36  DH:35
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  • I would think lots of openings happen in the centers around August. At my kid's center, they move up a class in August. When the preschoolers start kindergarten everyone shifts up to the next class up. My center has one newborn room and 2 of each the 2s, 3s, and preschool rooms.
  • Bummer for your area costing so much. That would render working useless for me.
  • There are definitely waiting lists here where I am. Start researching and touring as soon as you can. For infants its 200/week, and thats without food. Which is more for the toddler stage, not the infants. But if you could find a daycare that provides food for when they get older, I would do it! 
    Me: 33 / DH: 35
    Married: Nov 2006
    DD: Sept 2010
    DS: June 2013
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  • That sounds like a lot of money. But checking it out now makes sense. You definitely don't want to be left stranded. We have a nanny because our schedules are really weird and there's no daycare that would work for us. But that estimate you got is roughly what we pay the nanny so you might want to look into that.
    Me: 33   DH: 42
    DD: 6
    DS: 2
  • @sp128 you're not alone on living in an expensive area - my first choice for a center was around $1800/month last time I checked. 

    We we actually have a family member who will be quitting their job to watch our baby and another family member's baby. We still plan to pay them $1000/month. In my area, this is a great discount! 



  • Unfortunately daycare is sooo expensive in our area (Southern California). We were paying about $1750/mo for our 15mo old just until last month. I'm trying out the SAHM thing bc after removing daycare cost, it's not hat much of an income loss. We're eating out waaaay less because I am makingn it a point to cook dinner daily and I'm spending more than 1-2 hours per day with my son. 
  • @hartmich  You are so lucky!

    Right now DH may work a different shift, that way we won't need daycare at all until we want to enroll the bean into preschool.

    @LeilaD123  We definitely talked about me staying at home.  We would lose money every month when we have #2.  The downside is that it'll affect my pension : (  Also with my job I can only take one year sabbatical before they can give away my job.  
    ***TW***
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    BFP 9/6/2016 - Missed MC 10/20/2016  
    BFP 5/5/2017  - CP
    IVF #1 - June 2017  - Transferred 1 fresh 4 AA embryo.  7/9 Beta #1 - 161 
    <3 Adam <3 Born on 3/18/18




     
  • Mass is crazy. We could only afford 3 days a week for an infant and that was in Burlington (although I love the place - it's a Kindercare). Places that were a bit less expensive all had waiting lists or weren't convenient with pick up/drop off time. I pay $1400/month full time for a 3 year old right now at Kindercare. When we move, it's going to be even more expensive. It's awful! 

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  • Hi. Are you a teacher? My friends are teachers and they asked me (I have a 2 year old) to keep their daughter until we moved. I had just resigned because I knew we were moving for my husband's job, which ended up being 8 months later, but whatever
  • We have lived 3 places since our first was born and infant care was always in the $1600-1900 range. Even more for a nanny. For the first job I held during this time, we spent considerably more on childcare than I was making, and I didn't even really like my job. But I did need to stay with it for career advancement, which paid off, though once we had two kids in daycare (and a new job) I was still spending more than my take-home pay on childcare!

    I also agree regarding centers being hard to get into. We are going to do some visits asap and try to lock something down. My daughter couldn't get in the same place as her brother at first (even though siblings get priority) because we waited until I was about 18 weeks along to inquire (we didn't want to go spilling the beans I was pregnant.)
  • We were hoping to get into our church day care, not just because it's associated with our church but also because it is one of the best in town. I know we need to get on a waiting list soon or we won't have a spot. But I'm due May 4 & I'm a teacher, so I'll have the summer to be with my baby. I definitely plan on going back to work though in August. If we don't get into our choice, we'll have to search around. I have no idea of the costs. My mother-in-law can be called if needed, but that isn't a permanent solution. She is very flexible but lives an hr & half away. My best friend wants to watch our baby, but...I love her dearly, but she is a horrible housekeeper, if she were at home her twins would be home with her too & one of them is way too rough, and she's been working on her degree for about 5 years now. I really just want her to focus on school & then get a job. 
  • @mamagain520  I'm a school psychologist.  I work in the public schools and follow teacher everything (schedule, union etc)

    @kat81_v3  I need to call and set up appointments to visit as well.  My DH and I are seriously considering him going to the 4-12 am shift just so we do not have to pay for daycare.  I feel so unprepared already.
    ***TW***
    Me: 36  DH:35
    Married: 7/10/2016
    TTC#1 - May 2016
    BFP 9/6/2016 - Missed MC 10/20/2016  
    BFP 5/5/2017  - CP
    IVF #1 - June 2017  - Transferred 1 fresh 4 AA embryo.  7/9 Beta #1 - 161 
    <3 Adam <3 Born on 3/18/18




     
  • There are, um, 5 day cares where I live?  And infant spots are impossible.  I used to be the director at one and we had a dozen infants on a wait list for 3 available slots.  Some of those mom's didn't get in until their babies were over a year and no longer considered infants.  We'll get priority because my husband is a provider in one of the day cares so he gets priority.  Otherwise we'd be screwed with a preschooler, toddler, and infant.

    B born 7/15/13, C born 3/2/15, #3 on the way May '17


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  • I'm in Massachusetts and looking as well. That sounds about right. So crazy. I've been looking at an at home and a couple centers that were recommended to me. I have a 14 month old at home who will start day care soon it's so hard to find one that you feel super comfortable leaving your baby with and isn't basically another mortgage 
  • @SP128, YES...this is the unfortunate reality of the Boston area daycare situation. With my first, we were on multiple waitlists very early and luckily got into our top choice. We pay $1550, which is super cheap by MA standards...I think we have the highest childcare costs in the country.

    I'm not sure if this is helpful, but when we were weighing the pros and cons of sending this second baby to daycare with over $3k in monthly fees for the 2 vs me staying home, we looked at the long term earning upside to me staying employed, like 5 years from now, if my career continues to progress, how much money would we have for college funds, family vacations, etc, that we wouldn't if I quit now. 
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  • I live in an area that has a ton of daycare options but for some reason there are still waiting lists. With my first I called around when I was 12 weeks pregnant and went on some tours. I found an in home daycare that I loved and I had to be put on a waiting list. Closer to my due date, I found out they had an opening. I pay $40/day for part time and I'm pretty happy with it. The larger centers were about $60/day.

    When I was looking for a daycare, I searched online at the states licensing office. You want to make sure you are sending your child to a licensed facility that is being monitored by the state. You can see if any complaints have been filed and read the inspection reports. This is VERY helpful. The daycare licensing and regulation rules are very strict and some of the offenses are minor but some are not.

  • We have a lot of daycares where I am in central FL but many of them are not ones you would really want to put your child in to. I know of one that has a relatively long waiting list but the daycare DD goes to part time does not usually have much of a list. Seeing the price that others are paying make me really appreciate the $200/week for FT infant care that our center charges, and that is one of the "expensive" places here.
    M: 39 H: 40
    DD: 12/31/13
    LO#2 due 5/6/17
  • @Kipperoo  That's a good way of looking at it.  This is our first but we know that we want another quickly after the first because of our age.  If we do the day care route we would definitely have 2 in it for a few years.  
    If I take time off of work it would count against my pension unfortunately.  It is not a deal breaker if I absolutely had to but its something to consider since it would affect us in the long run.  I'm also worried about finding employment again afterwards.  After everyone starts school, my salary would be higher than a district would probably want to pay : (   I also would lose professional status (aka tenure).  So many grown up things to think about!

    $1550 is amazing by the way.

    For those in Massachusetts are work in education.  Kindercare offers 10% discount with your MTA card.  For others that work in education it wouldn't hurt to ask your day care provider.  

    Also a fun fact I learned is that if your daycare provider is not licensed than you can't claim them on your taxes.  They have to have a tax id number.  Not sure if this is exclusive to Mass.
    ***TW***
    Me: 36  DH:35
    Married: 7/10/2016
    TTC#1 - May 2016
    BFP 9/6/2016 - Missed MC 10/20/2016  
    BFP 5/5/2017  - CP
    IVF #1 - June 2017  - Transferred 1 fresh 4 AA embryo.  7/9 Beta #1 - 161 
    <3 Adam <3 Born on 3/18/18




     
  • @SP128, you could always look into a nanny share in your area, too! In general, I think the nanny route is cheaper with 2 (if you are thinking that far ahead). 

    And, yes, we are "lucky" with a $1550/month daycare situation. We lived in Somerville when he was born and started him in the daycare there...loved it so much that when we moved to the North Shore, we kept him there and now commute with him every morning. Small price to pay when you've found somewhere you love! My suggestion would be to start touring and just get your name on wait lists...once you've got a few options lined up, you can rest easy for the balance of the pregnancy. Daycare spots fill up FAST for infants in these parts because there are so many working parents and so many regulations around daycare accreditation in MA that there are a limited number of centers. GOOD LUCK!
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  • Kipperoo said:
    *snip*

    I'm not sure if this is helpful, but when we were weighing the pros and cons of sending this second baby to daycare with over $3k in monthly fees for the 2 vs me staying home, we looked at the long term earning upside to me staying employed, like 5 years from now, if my career continues to progress, how much money would we have for college funds, family vacations, etc, that we wouldn't if I quit now. 
    THIS. So much this. People don't often take this into consideration when making the decision to take time off of work. There is a lot more than just your paycheck that a lot of job's offer. And when you go from dual income to single income, the risks if the remaining provider loses their job (or is an accident, falls ill, etc etc) are so much greater. I'm a financial planner so this kind of stuff is something that just drives me crazy! 



  • My H is a freelance designer and works from home so it was a no-brainer to have him be a SAHD for our son. It was a big adjustment at first, but the savings in day-care mean we aren't really losing that much income, plus our child gets to spend lots of time with Daddy, which is awesome. Those prices you ladies mention sound so high! We will be doing the same for this baby. Being a single-income household is definitely challenging, but we make it work for now, and once they are in school we will go back to two.
  • We have ft infant 313$ a week they have a pool in the summer that is staffed by lifegaurds and there is a fee in the summer to use the pool but I don't know what itll be since we just started here end of august. They provide formula puree cereal when its time for infants to start that then when they go to the 1 yr plus room they get breakfast lunch 2 snacks each day. I live in ny but commute 1 1/2 hrs both ways to work in CT so I do have many options for daycare because I pass so many on my way to work. I started DS in a daycare close to my job because we fell in love with it and it was super convenient. At that time we got the last infant slot. This was early june and lo started daycare in november. After a few months of my son being constantly sick, all his teachers left, he came home in other kids diapers when he had enough diapers to use, was always messy in the face from purees at pickup at 5 pm! really they couldn't wipe his face after the last puree? Anyway he was also getting weekly diaper rashes. When I went to the director with a very polite email she pretty much said your kid poops alot, my people check and put cream on every change (which the sheets I took home did not reflect was true ) and you have to deal with it. This plus her sun tan lotion policy of spray no rub suntan lotion broke me. We started looking elsewhere. I found kindercare which was only 25 mins from my home and it was like a breath of fresh air! So relaxing and awesome but on the third week we were bring DS they told me that corporate had made the decision to close. Sooo we are now in a place called country kids in brookfield ct and we love it except for they open at 645 and we really need 630 for my horrible commute. 
  • With my choice of profession, I simply don't make a lot of money and there isn't much room for advancement. I'm already a manager, but work full time on an hourly basis (not salaried), and have minimal perks. I'm on my husband's insurance, and he makes roughly 3 times more than me. For us, it just makes sense for me to stay home...probably until preschool. I enjoy my field, but am honestly ready for a break from it, so I'm looking forward to being a SAHM for a couple years. 
  • I work third shift weekends and my husband works 1st shift so we don't have child care.
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  • Our area is not nearly that much at around $100-$120 a day. I know in another group I'm in for an older child that California prices were in the same $1500-2000 range. I think that's crazy and I don't see how anyone can afford it. Our area though can be hard to get into daycare if you don't get on the list early. 
  • Yikes! I thought we were expensive.  We paid in infant room $285 a week.  My son was born in feb and we got our spot in sept. He stated in june.  I actually had to extend my maternity leave (unpaid) because there were no may spots. They only have 8 spots for infants at our school and give siblings priority. My son was the only one in his class W/O a sibling at the school. There were 3 openings though in aug so I'm hoping this time around should be a little easier.  Just not looking forward to paying for 2 kids now.  May see if my son can go PT and my inlaws can watch him the other days.  May be a little easier on the wallet.
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