January 2017 Moms

Monday Bitch Fest 9/12

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Re: Monday Bitch Fest 9/12

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  • @emy730 I'm sorry you're still having to deal with m/s. I completely feel you on the tired though. My energy comes in bursts, and they are for sure not often enough. 

    I normally don't have a MBF, but I do after this weekend. First of all, I haven't had a weekend to myself in over a month. I am an outgoing introvert (where I like people and doing things, but I need time to recharge my batteries at home by myself), so I'm just kinda going crazy needing a me day. Also, all this socializing is taking up my limited energy time, so I feel like I have this nesting energy that is not getting to be used anywhere productive. 

    I did, however, get a couple of hours of me time yesterday, where I started to sand down my new desk, that will be sharing a corner of the baby's nursery. To whoever painted that beautiful desk with a black latex paint: I hope you get the crabs of a million whores and your arms be too short to reach. Seriously. I hate this person. Because of the paint choice they used, instead of the paint coming off when sanded, it melts and turns to this awful tar. I spent the one day I have to myself for like 12 days, tarring up half an antique desk. So now, I have to wait on my husband to use paint thinner to get all the paint off, so I can then sand the entire thing down, then do hinge and wood repairs on the inside, and re-paint the thing inside and out. If this paint thinner doesn't work, I will be destroying this desk Office Space style. 


    On top of that, something is wrong with H's car. We think it's just a dead battery, but we think that the alternator (that was replaced last year) might be messing up again.... which means that there is something that causing something to go wrong in the alternator. Luckily, we have a friend who really knows his stuff when it comes to cars, (and also has an engine lift), so that if it is indeed the alternator, H and friend will be able to do the labor to replace it, instead of having to pay for the nearly grand of labor at a shop. 

                                        
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  • Nesting. And DH was being useless yesterday. I mean I love football too, but our team sucks so let's get this nursery done! He ended up falling asleep during the fourth quarter anyway, so I hung up all the letters for the baby's name myself and then cleaned up the mess he made in the nursery. I even dragged a garbage can up there. When he woke up, he was like why didn't you wait for me? Because nesting. Then I made him hang the book shelves. I still feel unaccomplished. 

    Also I'm SO not feeling work today. I just want to Pinterest and keep working on the nursery. 
  • @cjs260 That seriously sucks about the paint choice. I hope the thinner works. It's always amazing to me when people ruin a perfectly wonderful piece of furniture by doing something totally stupid. 
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  • @emy730 Ugh, people! I remember reading something (though I can't remember where) that was trying to say women are evolutionarily/biologically programmed to forget the worst details of their pregnancy after it's all over with--like saying that they remember but that the details get fuzzy. Based on people's insensitivity, I want to believe that's true and it's just people being completely out of tune with how pregnancy actually is in realtime and willingly only remembering "oh yeah, first trimester = sick time because that's what TV and movie reminds me about".

    @cjs260 Ewwww, I can't even imagine what that must look like on a piece of furniture. Hopefully the time investment pays off and the underlying thing looks amazing when you're done with it!
  • @canavara Yes! What is with people being so inconsiderate? Maybe I just didn't notice before, but damn, it's like holding a door open or helping another person is ludicrous or something. 
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  • @canavara Yes. Just yes. People are either overly helpful or oblivious idiots. Weirdly, I had an awful experience at Home Depot last week too. I told DH I'm only shopping at pregnant lady/baby friendly stores now, like Buy Buy Baby or Babies R Us or early Sunday mornings at the grocery store. 
  • @Kurtni I can't imagine the emotions you are dealing with right now and then the added comments people make must multiply that. I'm so sorry. 
  • Pregsomnia + potty training is a terrible combination. Also I know people are trying to be nice when they say "you look great, you're barely showing" or "you're still in that in between stage". Thanks, so I guess ive always looked this huge and the 15 pounds I've gained is nothing. My boobs are bursting buttons and I'm in full on maternity pants. 
  • Ugh. I have a flat tire!!!! We have to be at the doc in 17 minutes and DH was going to come home to work right after and I was going to run errands. Now I'm stuck at home after our appt until he changes it :(
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  • @canavara YES! Wtf is wrong with people? I was at the pharmacy the other day waiting on a prescription to be filled, and when a chair finally opened up for me to have a seat, this man tried to intimidate me out of taking it. Um, no sir. Do not mess with me. And I have my FX about the desk, but I don't have very much hope. The paint thinner is definitely the last chance. Because if this won't take it off, it ain't coming off. 

    @Kurtni Again, wtf is wrong with people! I would start telling them more details than they want to know so that they feel super uncomfortable and maybe get the hint. 

    @emy730 Right? It must be the same type of people who put carpet over beautiful hardwood floors. 

                                        
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  • I'm moody as ever and I just finished my week of on call at work and now I wanna murder all direct care staff. Also morning meeting was a disaster and I'm out for blood! 
  • So the last two weeks we have been working on some updates around the house. Painting all the trim in the house white (I normally hate to paint woodwork but the color of this wood is so dated and I'm not messing with stripping and staining everything), painting the bathroom, and a few other walls, replacing light fixtures, outlets, switches, just a lot of little things that have ended up on the list. My DH took last week off to work on it and my MIL came down to help. The weather sucked, it rained 2-3 days last week which meant spraying the trim he had removed did not go as simply as it should have. My house is a complete disarray. The one thing I told my DH is that I wanted our guest room done and everything that needs to be done in there to make it my DS's room complete. Well, guess what, it's not there yet. It is close, just a few little touch ups, cleaning the floor well, and cutting the platform for the bed. But I survived last week thinking at least his room would be done and we could start working on getting him to sleep there in his big bed. Because I thought I had a week, I said, sure, let's start on stuff in the nursery and use that to store things because DS has only been sleeping in there max 3 hours a night before coming in with us. So, long story short, I've had a toddler sleeping with us for a week and looking at another week of it. I'm just ready for it to be done. The only reason we started now was because it's all stuff that we need to do in order to sell eventually and I don't want to do it with 2.

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  • @Kurtni , I second @emy730. That is messed up for people to act like that. They say we have "pregnancy brain" but when I read comments like yours, and others on this thread, I feel like we are the only ones thinking clearly. 

    My MBF - I've started to get heart burn and it sucks when I lay down because it feels like the burn goes up my esophagus. BUT I have to add this. I've had REALLY bad hormones going on for the last month (e.g. raging bitch or collapsing in tears) and I've actually felt like myself starting this past Friday. DH and I were actually able to have sex for the first time in a month without me bursting into ugly tears or screaming and yelling like a psycho banshee woman in the middle of it. So today I celebrate my MBF because I will gladly take being physically uncomfortable after eating a taco over being emotionally tormented by hidden demons.  

    **The hormones have done such a number on me that I'm actually nervous about post-partum depression after I have the baby, as both of my sisters had it. I've already warned DH and given him info about signs and symptoms in case it happens and I need help.**


    Anniversary

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  • @Kurtni I'm so sorry for your past loss. I can't believe anyone would find it appropriate to constantly remind you of that loss! We lost twins last year and at my last meeting with my doula, she had us do a recognition ceremony for them as a way of letting me and my fiance formally disconnect their loss with the current pregnancy, reminding us that "this pregnancy is not that pregnancy and it's important to focus on the fact that things are going well with this one while also not forgetting that there were children lost in the last pregnancy and that they were people too." No one really talks to us about our loss so I'm thankful for that, but I'm really sorry that anyone would try to insinuate that there is some way you could have prevented yours! That's so not okay.
  • canavara said:
    @Kurtni I'm so sorry for your past loss. I can't believe anyone would find it appropriate to constantly remind you of that loss! We lost twins last year and at my last meeting with my doula, she had us do a recognition ceremony for them as a way of letting me and my fiance formally disconnect their loss with the current pregnancy, reminding us that "this pregnancy is not that pregnancy and it's important to focus on the fact that things are going well with this one while also not forgetting that there were children lost in the last pregnancy and that they were people too." No one really talks to us about our loss so I'm thankful for that, but I'm really sorry that anyone would try to insinuate that there is some way you could have prevented yours! That's so not okay.
    I'm so sorry for your loss. 

    The bolded is a beautiful way to move forward, and I'm so glad you were able to do that. 
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  • edited September 2016
    So, I'm trying to help DD socialize by going to playgroups, programs at the library, etc., and lately I've really been struggling with how to handle parents with different ways of handling their kids than I do, specifically with sharing or hurting other kids. I try really hard to keep DD from grabbing other kids' toys and encourage her to take turns with the toys that she's had, and if she hits/pushes I intervene immediately to tell her that's not nice and to smile or "gentle touch" to say sorry. She's only 15 months so a lot of this goes over her head, but I figure if I correct her often enough, she'll eventually get it.  But I've noticed a lot of moms - not all by any means; I've met plenty who handle things exactly the same way i do and then the kids usually work things out themselves - but a decent amount will just stand by and watch while their kids grab toys, freak out at my daughter for trying to make friends with them, and push/hit her when they don't get their own way.  I get that the kids themselves, who are typically older than DD, are still learning social skills themselves, so it's not really fair to get mad at them.  But it makes me so mad when a parent sits by and watches their kid be flat out mean and does NOTHING to correct them.  And usually, unless the kid in question physically harms my daughter, I don't feel comfortable correcting them myself because they aren't my kids.  So, a) the whole thing really ticks me off and b) STMs, have you guys experienced this and how do you handle it? I don't like the idea of telling strangers or their kids how to act, but I'm so tired of watching my 15 month old get pushed around. Lol sorry, this started out as a MBF post and turned into a STM one...
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  • I'm tired of BIL. My H's brother. He is a terrible brother and it makes me sad. SIL and BIL came down for the weekend to a resort close to our house for a work conference. We talked it over with them and decided to visit for the weekend and We both took a day off work to hang out because the conference doesn't really start until tomorrow night. I'm upset because it felt like they would rather hang out with their work friends who they see every day at work rather than hang out with his brother who he sees once or twice a year. It would make sense if he wanted to network with new people, but it was people from his office e. We came home early because it was noon before they decided they wanted to include us in their plans. We were checking out today and instead of just hanging out all day like we planned we just said good bye and left. My heart breaks for H. He says he isn't bothered because this is how his brother has always been. I can't fathom it, that wouldn't fly in my family. Family always comes first.
  • AmRe214 said:
    I'm tired of BIL. My H's brother. He is a terrible brother and it makes me sad. SIL and BIL came down for the weekend to a resort close to our house for a work conference. We talked it over with them and decided to visit for the weekend and We both took a day off work to hang out because the conference doesn't really start until tomorrow night. I'm upset because it felt like they would rather hang out with their work friends who they see every day at work rather than hang out with his brother who he sees once or twice a year. It would make sense if he wanted to network with new people, but it was people from his office e. We came home early because it was noon before they decided they wanted to include us in their plans. We were checking out today and instead of just hanging out all day like we planned we just said good bye and left. My heart breaks for H. He says he isn't bothered because this is how his brother has always been. I can't fathom it, that wouldn't fly in my family. Family always comes first.
    In-laws can really suck sometimes.  My situation is kind of similar; my family always puts family first and DH's says they do, but in reality they expect us to put them first but don't reciprocate.  Similarly, DH doesn't typically mind and usually doesn't even pick up on it.  I'm trying to work on not being bothered by things that don't bother him.  My strategy lately has been that I do not contact them at all and let him handle them; if he wants to see them I'm happy to (or do my best to pretend to be), but I don't initiate anything myself. It's a lot easier said than done because my instinct is to fix things and express my feelings whether they're good or bad, but when I follow the strategy, I have SO much less drama in my life.  
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  • amaren-2amaren-2 member
    edited September 2016
    @karaelaine1991 yeah. I totally let little things bother me. His brother is the only one in his family to do this, it drives me up the wall. Everytime we plan to hang out with them we wait around for whenever they feel like they want to be associated with us and do what they want. No one in his family will call him out on it and it pisses me off. Everyone feels the same way, but MIL/FIL won't say anything because they want to see their grand kids and DH wants to see his brothers family.  I'm over here like..
     Wtf, why doesn't anyone tell him? 

    I'm hurt by a lot of things, but the worst was that H had thought about sticking around the resort and hanging out while I drove home and took a nap and cooled off, then I would come back a few hours later. But BIL was like, 'no go be with your wife, we will see you later.'  He didn't want want to hang out with him.
  • I think the air around me has turned to jello. How does everything take so long nowadays?! Yesterday I sorted hand me down clothes, painted the closet, organized and swept the nursery and it took HOURS longer than it should've. WTF body?! Get with it!! 3 months left, I don't have time to move this slow! 
  • katesmama0706katesmama0706 member
    edited September 2016
    I have two today. 1- this is the first time I've been able to get onto the bump all day, mobile or computer. Constant crashing and  annoying as all get out. 
    2- I'm super trired of honestly replying that I feel good when asked and being met with "well fuck you" by fellow pregnant women! I have 3 pregnant cousins and 1 pregnant friend right now IRL and they've all had pretty sucky pregnancies and while that totally sucks and I feel bad I'm not gonna lie and say I feel terrible if I don't, but it's also not my fault so sorry not sorry guys. Same thing happened last pregnancy and it just drives me crazy.
  • Ladies, I feel like a lot of us are dealing with the same problem. I am so tired of everyone's opinions and horror stories. "Don't eat too much. Is that all you're eating? Isn't that bad for the baby? Your skin still looks like that? Why are you still throwing up? Isn't there medicine for that? My husband's cousin's grandma's friend's kid lost their baby at the same gestational age you're at now."

    During the first trimester, I smiled and nodded and my husband would step in and say things from time to time. Now I've become a snippy bitch when getting unsolicited advice. Oversharing makes people uncomfortable. Honestly, I wish they could act appropriately so I wouldn't have to. I'm really doing my best.
  • @TinaBelcher I feel the same way! My nesting is starting to kick in, and I want to get things done as quickly as I did before. I get it, we're pregnant, but we've got stuff to do. 

    My problem is I keep getting winded even doing easy stuff like folding clothes. 
  • I have two today. 1- this is the first time I've been able to get onto the bump all day, mobile or computer. Constant crashing and  annoying as all get out. 
    2- I'm super trired of honestly replying that I feel good when asked and being met with "well fuck you" by fellow pregnant women! I have 3 pregnant cousins and 1 pregnant friend right now IRL and they've all had pretty sucky pregnancies and while that totally sucks and I feel bad I'm not gonna lie and say I feel terrible if I don't, but it's also not my fault so sorry not sorry guys. Same thing happened last pregnancy and it just drives me crazy.
    Whoa! I have felt absolutely awful this entire pregnancy (and the last one too), but I would NEVER, EVER wish that upon anyone else. It sucks, and I'm actually happy to hear that other people feel good during their pregnancies. It's nice to have people to commiserate with, yes, but I am never happy to hear that someone else is still puking into their second trimester. Sorry people suck :(
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  • @emy730 it seriously shocks me! One cousin is 34 weeks and was like "well I threw up this week so you suck". Girl please. I was like "I am so so sorry that you feel like crap and if I can help you with anything please let me know but stop hating me because my body is tolerating this all pretty well!" and she rolled her eyes. Seriously?!
  • @emy730 it seriously shocks me! One cousin is 34 weeks and was like "well I threw up this week so you suck". Girl please. I was like "I am so so sorry that you feel like crap and if I can help you with anything please let me know but stop hating me because my body is tolerating this all pretty well!" and she rolled her eyes. Seriously?!

    Yeah, if you went out of your way to make a comment about helping her out, she needs to be nice. It's not like you were flaunting how great you feel in her face. 

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  • @katesmama0706 that's horrible that they're treating you that way!  I would never wish the bad parts of my pregnancy on anyone.  I'm glad you feel well.  I would think they would be envious, but no need for them to be outwardly bitchy about it to another pregnant lady.  
  • @katesmama0706 Pregnant women hating on each other is the worst. I have a friend that did the opposite to me. I'm still having nausea and a few weeks ago (right after she announced she was pregnant) she told me she would never have another baby if her pregnancy was anything like mine. She went on and on about how I'm having such an awful pregnancy compared to her first one. Um... okay. I actually didn't think it was that bad. Ugh. Can't pregnant ladies all just get along?!
  • I'm due January 3rd and if I hear one more person say "oh maybe it'll be a news years baby" I'm going to punch them in the face. Like do you really think you are the first person to think it could be a New Years baby, get out of my face. 

    I also feel like bitching about my dad. I am visiting him from a different province and he is just so irritating. His phone started acting funny the other night and he has literally not stopped talking about it or trying to figure out what to do. Like we are only here for a week how about you fucking put your phone away and spend time with your grand daughter that you see maybe once a year and play with her. He gets grumpy because she doesn't particularly like him, but again she's almost 3 (so an asshole) and sees you never. Like work for it buddy. He thinks she should just be all HEYY NONNO I wanna play with you by she's not. He also gets up in her face and she hates that so then she shuts down even more. Like frick I warned you not to do that so I'm not even sorry she's being a dick to you....grrr 


  • @mudderbear my DD sees her grandparents (my in-laws) a few times a month, but she's 14 months and doesn't especially like them and they are just like that with her! DD will be sitting in my lap and MIL will get all up in her face and I kid you not be like "oh, are too many people in your space and you don't like it?!" YES that is exactly the problem so why are you doing it? Leave her alone. She doesn't automatically have to like you because you are her grandparents but don't make it worse by doing the exact thing she hates more than anything!
  • @christac1010 my mother in law told me she wouldn't have had so many kids of her pregnancies were like mine  :| women just need to support each other.
  • At long last my husband put up the shelves in the nursery closet.  Yesterday he finally got around to putting the doors on the closet only to find that they are a half inch too wide.  They are hollow core doors so I have no idea how to shave 1/4 of an inch off each of them.

    Also, my MIL caught a glimpse of the closet while Facetiming, and her only comment was "where's all the pink?"  Like it's the only color a female baby can wear.

    Jan17 Sept Sig: Pumpkin Spice gone too far
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  • sagoon said:
    At long last my husband put up the shelves in the nursery closet.  Yesterday he finally got around to putting the doors on the closet only to find that they are a half inch too wide.  They are hollow core doors so I have no idea how to shave 1/4 of an inch off each of them.

    Also, my MIL caught a glimpse of the closet while Facetiming, and her only comment was "where's all the pink?"  Like it's the only color a female baby can wear.
    1/4 inch on one side or the other shouldn't be too bad. Our hollow core closet doors needed to be shaved down about 2 inches on the bottom. Husband cut it off with a table saw then filled it with wood pieces and glue. Just a suggestion to help. 

    My MBF-I walked in to school today after being off Thurs and Fri to shit apparently hitting the fan on Friday and my responsibilities for a task increasing and my team, while not communicating said changes to me, expecting me to produce said products this morning. I'm not kidding you 5 steps in the door! I firmly stood my ground and walked away basically saying fuck it. Oh and my schedule is changing so I might be teaching subjects and grade levels I've never taught before. It's the third week of school. My inclusion partner also didn't have anything ready for our classes. It was a great day. *hardcore eyeroll*
  • I got another one.....drives me nuts having friends that don't have kids. They want to get together to see us but want to get together at 7:30 at night. K so I get to see you for half hour while my kid is a crusty a-hole...no thanks

    @katesmama0706 sometimes parents can be so effing annoying. I think my dad is just jealous that my girl loves her other grandfather so much (who she sees like daily). Like seriously how can he even expect to have a decent relationship with her if he's never there and when he is he's "too busy" to be all about her like she wants. Get off your computer, get off your phone and take her to the fricken park or go outside its nice out. Poor kid just gets cooped up inside when we are here, or is just being dragged to people's houses that she doesn't know. 
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