One of H's friends went on a rant last night about how we let our two year old run our lives. First, no we don't. Second, he has no children.
He based this off the fact that H spent an hour getting DD to sleep last night. She's terrified of the dark, so it takes some patience. He told us we need to just let her cry, which we tried and she ends up puking everywhere and still not sleeping.
It's just ridiculous and he was comparing it to having a puppy. Not the same!
@emy730 Ugh, people who dish out parenting advice and/or opinions without any personal experience are the. worst. You should get him to babysit your daughter some night just to give him a taste of what it's really like (I say this of course as someone who currently doesn't have any living children but I certainly can appreciate how hard it is from observation!)
Mine's weak but whatever. I thought pregnancy would make people more kind or considerate. I was standing in line at Joanne Fabrics on Saturday holding some bulky items that were kind of heavy... bump noticeably visible (shirt even saying "Due in January")... struggling... and this couple in front of me just stood there after their transaction asking the cashier about things on sale at Hobby Lobby or whatever. They'd occasionally look back at me like "what's her deal" and keep talking, forcing me to stand there longer trying hard not to drop everything.
I'm curious to see if people's inconsiderate behavior lasts all the way to the end of 3rd trimester.
Totally updating mine because I thought of something so much worse:
A few of our friends have asked us when our baby shower is. I explained "my mom apparently is organizing one? I don't know any details yet though..." So I called her to find out what was up with that and was like, "You said you were going to throw a baby shower. When? And who exactly were you planning on inviting?" She then tells me, "Oh um... I can't actually afford to do that. And I would have invited ... you know.. normal people... my family. Maybe [OH]'s parents..." I went ragey: "You understand that traditionally when people have baby showers they like to have their friends there, right? Why would you volunteer to throw a baby shower for me without taking into consideration the people that he and I actually would want to attend? And why would you volunteer if you don't have the financial means to see it through?"
I'm not upset that she can't afford it, but I am upset that she was like, SUPER insistent on throwing one just a month ago... and apparently just does not get how humans work or something. I know so many women are just ragey about their MILs but my mom alone is just freaking... so... ugh that it makes my MIL amazing in comparison.
DH is painting the nursery today and I've been banished downstairs. This stage of nursery prep sucks. I feel like he's doing all the work and I'm just sitting here. I understand he's painting walls/sanding and spray painting furniture/laying hardwood floors, so I really shouldn't be around anyway. I just hate feeling like I'm not helping him.
This weekend we bought more zipper pajamas at Carters, the letters for his name for the nursery wall, some beginning storage and decorations, and I cleaned the house. Now I have chili in the crockpot for dinner. I can't figure out what to do with myself!
@canavara People are either so sweet (like the older woman who took my cart back for me while grocery shopping) or oblivious, bordering on rude (like the woman who let her child ram the shopping cart into my stomach and then gave me a dirty look). It's so weird how different every person is throughout the day.
Super first-world-problems today but I've been trying to take advantage of labor day sales and order my nursery furniture but the website is too bogged down by traffic and overall just been sucky. My nesting needs things ordered!
One of my dogs hurt his back two weeks ago and has been on strict crate rest, basically he is either in his crate or on the couch with me. He was a very active dog before so this is hard for him, he is barky and constantly wanting something. I love the dog, but he is too much for me right now. I worked from home two days last week (water was shut off in my building because of a lime break and Hermine), so I already felt like I was already constantly up to take him out, give him water, take him out, give him pills, give him water. I'm not mad at him, but I'm mad at H.
H has been using every excuse to get out of the house this weekend (or st least it feels like it) he had overnight watch on Saturday, he helped people move on Sunday, ran to the store to get paint, ran to the restaurant to get takeout, and just now ran to the store to get groceries. I know this just sounds so petty, and he was just trying to be nice and do chores for me, but I'm so tired of Him running off and leaving me with the dogs.
@christac1010 don't feel bad! My DH did a lot of that at the beginning but towards the end is what I think is the most fun. You get to fold clothes, set up the room just how you want it with décor. Plus, it sounds like you have been busy today! I say a nap is in order.
My DH woke up this morning "sick" which always means that he turns into a big baby. But.. apparently his is not sick enough to cancel his golf tee time. I swear, if he comes back and starts complaining tonight about how he is sick I will throat punch him.
Pumpkin Spice Gone to Far| Jan '17 September Siggy Challenge
I'm currently in SC with my inlaws... Literally everyone is talking about and flipping out over the bees that were killed when they sprayed to kill the mosquitos with Zika. I tried to explain that while I'm sorry the bees died and I agree more notice should have been given, I'm glad they sprayed for the mosiquitos that carry a virus that would potentially harm my baby. All these people act like I'm a crazy bee hater... Actually I just love my baby and have an instinct to protect it.
We had our reveal Saturday, we're having a boy. I'm excited to be a two-boy mom, but my mom really wanted a girl. She looked at me and literally said "you need to do better than that" and has refused to acknowledge the new boy baby in conversation. In the last two days I mention either Tucker (the new nabe) by name or that I finally was able to go buy my first clothes for him and she just starts talking about something else. It is royally passing me off. WTF woman??
Team Blue ~ Jan. 20 DS born 9/4/12 MMC July 2015 MMC January 2016
@AlabamaRedhead Yuck, what a terrible way to act. It's not like you had anything to do with what sex the baby is, and besides what does it matter. It's a precious new life coming into the world. What grandparent wouldn't be thrilled just for a healthy baby?
@AlabamaRedhead She needs to do better! I get wanting to have a granddaughter, but that's no reason to act that way. I'm sorry she's not reacting well. Hopefully she'll get over it soon and act like a better mom and grandma.
My MBF... I offered to watch my two week old niece for a few hours so that my SIL could get some sleep. It was supposed to be Saturday but stuff came up on their end so here I am watching her today. My SIL brought her over at 8 am and she texted us at 3 to see how everything was and that she's going to the store then heading over to get the baby. It's now a quarter to 6 and I'm like um... Where is she?? I had to text her and she responded that she's stopping by the store then heading over. Um... I'm totally cool watching the baby. I'm totally cool that she's been here all day. But when you tell me you're heading over in a bit to get the baby, I expect you within an hour, maybe an hour and a half. Not no contact for almost three hours! I mean, seriously?!?! Communicate with me if you're going to be late. We love our niece and everything and want to be supportive, but don't take advantage of us!
I'm giving it some time, before I say something. You would think after two losses in a row, she'd be a little more excited. Between that and some people acting like I have some horrible diagnosis by saying "well, God has his reasons" or "you can always try again " I'm just done. F'n done.
Team Blue ~ Jan. 20 DS born 9/4/12 MMC July 2015 MMC January 2016
My MBF... I offered to watch my two week old niece for a few hours so that my SIL could get some sleep. It was supposed to be Saturday but stuff came up on their end so here I am watching her today. My SIL brought her over at 8 am and she texted us at 3 to see how everything was and that she's going to the store then heading over to get the baby. It's now a quarter to 6 and I'm like um... Where is she?? I had to text her and she responded that she's stopping by the store then heading over. Um... I'm totally cool watching the baby. I'm totally cool that she's been here all day. But when you tell me you're heading over in a bit to get the baby, I expect you within an hour, maybe an hour and a half. Not no contact for almost three hours! I mean, seriously?!?! Communicate with me if you're going to be late. We love our niece and everything and want to be supportive, but don't take advantage of us!
I can't imagine leaving a 2 week old for that long!
@Teach123 That's a whole different can of worms! I think I stressed going to Rite Aid to get my blood pressure taken while my mom stayed home with my son at 1 week. I was gone for 20 minutes at the most.
I'm giving it some time, before I say something. You would think after two losses in a row, she'd be a little more excited. Between that and some people acting like I have some horrible diagnosis by saying "well, God has his reasons" or "you can always try again " I'm just done. F'n done.
Ugh, I feel your pain. That must be horrible to hear from your own mother. Im so sick of hearing people say "you must be hoping for a boy" simply because I already have a daughter. We didn't "try for a boy" this time, we tried for a second child! FFS, I swear this is even more motivation for me to be team green. I dare someone to say something assanine once the actual baby is here.
I just don't know why people think you have to have one of each. Even after I said "No, we're done. DH is getting fixed during Spring Break (because we know how to party!!)" they say "Well, you could always adopt." Dude, what part of "we're done" don't you get!?!?!?
Team Blue ~ Jan. 20 DS born 9/4/12 MMC July 2015 MMC January 2016
Ugh last night one of my coworkers told me after this baby (another girl) we have to try again for a boy...no I only want two. I told her you only have two boys why not go for a girl? She just stuttered oh well two boys is better than three......okay so why is it okay for you to quit after two of the same but not okay for me to quit....two girls is better than three? Like just shut the eff up
@christac1010 don't feel bad! My DH did a lot of that at the beginning but towards the end is what I think is the most fun. You get to fold clothes, set up the room just how you want it with décor. Plus, it sounds like you have been busy today! I say a nap is in order.
My DH woke up this morning "sick" which always means that he turns into a big baby. But.. apparently his is not sick enough to cancel his golf tee time. I swear, if he comes back and starts complaining tonight about how he is sick I will throat punch him.
GAH! The man cold is the worst. Hope he didn't complain last night and he gets over it soon!
My MBF... I offered to watch my two week old niece for a few hours so that my SIL could get some sleep. It was supposed to be Saturday but stuff came up on their end so here I am watching her today. My SIL brought her over at 8 am and she texted us at 3 to see how everything was and that she's going to the store then heading over to get the baby. It's now a quarter to 6 and I'm like um... Where is she?? I had to text her and she responded that she's stopping by the store then heading over. Um... I'm totally cool watching the baby. I'm totally cool that she's been here all day. But when you tell me you're heading over in a bit to get the baby, I expect you within an hour, maybe an hour and a half. Not no contact for almost three hours! I mean, seriously?!?! Communicate with me if you're going to be late. We love our niece and everything and want to be supportive, but don't take advantage of us!
@vgempis Wow, her behavior is a bit strange. I'm a FTM but someone leaving a two week old for hours with someone so she could sleep...then actually using that time to run around town....makes me a little nervous. Maybe she needed some "me" time which is completely understandable, maybe she is having some postpartum hormones but why did she feel the need to hide that (maybe she is self-conscious about wanting "me" time?)? Also, if she is having postpartum issues she may need someone to talk to.
Whatever the case may be, her lack of communication is a HUGE red flag to me. I hope everything works out for the best.
I'm going to bitch about MS... again. I am so freakin' sick of this shit! I wasn't feeling the greatest when I laid down, but I fell asleep, and woke up at 2:30 a.m. and threw up my entire dinner.
I went back to sleep, but haven't been feeling well all day. I took my OTC Diclegis AND a Zofran, but neither is helping. Trying to work while feeling like this is not going well... I'm so unfocused and I just feel like garbage.
At this point, eating causes some serious anxiety because I just assume it's coming back up or going to make me feel unbelievably nauseated. I know it's worth it in the long run, but feeling like this for 20 more weeks is not cool. I am so sick of being sick.
My sister. My fucking sister (the one who is very dramatic and overbearing) wanted SO BADLY to plan my shower and cut mom out of it (they don't get along well, whatever). I told her flat out whatever she wants is fine- I'm too busy to deal and I shouldn't plan my own anyway so she has free reign. So it's supposed to be on 10/2, sister told me weeks ago that she was signing contracts YEAY all planned! Except that she just... Didn't. Then the place booked up. Back to square one. And then..... nothing! Finally on Friday last week my mom got mad and just booked a new place for 10/23. I helped her with booking and threw an invite together because mom's even more dramatic than sister and I didn't want to get yelled at. Now it'll be at 30 weeks- hopefully I won't be on bedrest but I WILL be measuring at least 40 weeks at that point and hear from twin moms that 28-30 weeks is the end, you just can't function well after (I'm really bummed that we had to push it back but 4 weeks with no invites bought and needing rsvps and stuff? Not enough time!)
So today mom asked sister if she wants to be involved or not and sister texts me that she'd "do anything in the whole world" for me but work with mom, how should she handle it? I told her by not involving me. She proceeded to pick a fight with me about MY lack of communication if I was upset (omg how would a sane person NOT be stressed when it's 4 weeks out and you don't have a location??) and I pretty much told her to fuck off and go away deal with mom or don't but I had quite enough of that convo so BYE.
@TinaBelcher Ugh, that sounds awful. I'm so sorry you're having to deal with this. Hopefully you won't be on bedrest and you'll be feeling okay enough for a few hours to get through the day.
@TinaBelcher Yikes! That drama and stress is the last thing you need to be dealing with. Hopefully you're not on bed rest and still feeling well enough to enjoy your shower.
@emy730 I'm so sorry you're still dealing with MS. It's the worst and just makes it hard to deal with the day to day of regular life. Yes, the result is worth it, but that doesn't make it any less miserable while you're feeling so terrible. Big hugs. Fingers crossed it goes away and stays away for the rest of your pregnancy.
I just don't know why people think you have to have one of each. Even after I said "No, we're done. DH is getting fixed during Spring Break (because we know how to party!!)" they say "Well, you could always adopt." Dude, what part of "we're done" don't you get!?!?!?
Yeah, I get it. We're having our second boy. This was a bonus baby. I thought I was one and done. We are definitely finished this time. Both of us are getting fixed this time to make sure nothing else happens. We are thankful for the children we will have, but we don't want any more. At my family reunion this weekend, people were like well you could still try for one more. Um, no. I don't need a girl. I just want a healthy baby.
@alabamaredhead@teach123 this is our second girl, we found out Friday, and I've already had a few people ask how many girls I would "risk" to get a boy. We don't plan on being done with 2, we may change our minds, but we're also not going to keep going until we get a boy andddd even if we had 4 or 5 or 10 girls and no boys it wouldn't be the end of the world! "Risking" more girls made me super mad.
Any one else getting super hot red face? Cannot handle it any longer. 90% of the time I'm not even hot, just my face is and I can't make it go away. Gah if this is what they call pregnancy glow I don't friggen want it
@TinaBelcher I've gotten to the point where I don't even care if they throw me a shower or not. I'm my baby's mother and I will provide for her the best way I can.
My sister was super gung-ho about throwing the shower then she tried to pawn off all event details on me (when, where, whose invited, etc etc etc) and I just kept saying "hmm yeah I don't know you might want to talk to X or X about that". She ended up giving it over to my SIL, who proceeded to decide that the entire month of October was not possible because she wants to meet up with some random guy she just met in Iowa for a few weeks (who the eff even does that???). Then my best friend asks if November 19th would work. Uhh... no. I love you girl but that's the weekend before T-gives and most everyone will be traveling then or soon to another place for the holidays.
Like I said - either throw one or don't, I really don't care. These are the same people who did not plan nor attend my bachelorette party or bridal shower so I already know they are all terrible with this kind of stuff. I just don't feel like getting my feelings hurt over it.
My actual MBF - I can't stand my mom and her opinion on my baby's name. I have quasi settled on a first name, it just so happens to be the only name that she likes. She would be so overly dramatic about the names that I picked that I could hardly stand to even talk about the baby with her. I was just on the phone with her and baby names came up (why didn't I just ignore it and start a new topic?) and I told her some of my middle names and she again begins to say all this crazy shit. She said one of my names is a name they use in the "barrio" and that I need to start picking good names. (Which first of all, barrio? Seriously? What exactly is she trying to say there?The middle name in question is Kennedy). Then I hear my brother in the background say "What about the name X?" and my mom starts talking about how beautiful that name is, blah blah blah!!!!!!!!!!!! And it's a name that I don't even like! IT'S MY BABY I WILL NAME HER WHATEVER I WANT, DO YOU UNDERSTAND THAT!?!?!?!?
I'm now considering changing my quasi-settled first name BECAUSE she likes it and I don't want there to be any doubt that I chose the name because she like it. I want to know that I chose a name because I liked.
I'm late sorry. I had court yesterday to get a restraining order put on someone who has been harassing me via text message. The judge wouldn't grant the order because he said there weren't enough texts after I told her to stop and they "weren't that bad" according to him. I got another one after I filed that would have put it at the right amount and it was scathing too. But he wouldn't look at it. He's not the one whose blood pressure spikes so high that I can see my pulse in my eyes when my phone goes off worrying that it's her trying to say something else completely bitchy to me about something that is completely none of her business since she is not family at all (very long back story to this whole thing). Anyway he told her not to contact me anymore but that hasn't stopped her since the police told her to stop twice already and that didn't stop her then. But apparently if she contacts me again I have to refile (more money down the drain) and then he said he would grant it. I feel so failed by the justice system. I know this is minor to some but my health and my baby's health are involved and that makes me very irate.
I'm late sorry. I had court yesterday to get a restraining order put on someone who has been harassing me via text message. The judge wouldn't grant the order because he said there weren't enough texts after I told her to stop and they "weren't that bad" according to him. I got another one after I filed that would have put it at the right amount and it was scathing too. But he wouldn't look at it. He's not the one whose blood pressure spikes so high that I can see my pulse in my eyes when my phone goes off worrying that it's her trying to say something else completely bitchy to me about something that is completely none of her business since she is not family at all (very long back story to this whole thing). Anyway he told her not to contact me anymore but that hasn't stopped her since the police told her to stop twice already and that didn't stop her then. But apparently if she contacts me again I have to refile (more money down the drain) and then he said he would grant it. I feel so failed by the justice system. I know this is minor to some but my health and my baby's health are involved and that makes me very irate.
I'm so sorry that you're going through this. At the risk of making a suggestion that you've tried to no success - have you tried blocking the person's number? I hope this situation goes away for you soon!
@karaelaine1991 unfortunately my phone company won't allow numbers to be blocked. So unfortunately I have to count on the fact that maybe she took it seriously when she had to miss a half day of work to come an hour south for court.
@karaelaine1991 unfortunately my phone company won't allow numbers to be blocked. So unfortunately I have to count on the fact that maybe she took it seriously when she had to miss a half day of work to come an hour south for court.
Ugh that's awful!! I'm so sorry no one is taking this seriously or trying to help you
Re: MBF: Labor Day Edition
He based this off the fact that H spent an hour getting DD to sleep last night. She's terrified of the dark, so it takes some patience. He told us we need to just let her cry, which we tried and she ends up puking everywhere and still not sleeping.
It's just ridiculous and he was comparing it to having a puppy. Not the same!
I'm curious to see if people's inconsiderate behavior lasts all the way to the end of 3rd trimester.
Totally updating mine because I thought of something so much worse:
A few of our friends have asked us when our baby shower is. I explained "my mom apparently is organizing one? I don't know any details yet though..." So I called her to find out what was up with that and was like, "You said you were going to throw a baby shower. When? And who exactly were you planning on inviting?" She then tells me, "Oh um... I can't actually afford to do that. And I would have invited ... you know.. normal people... my family. Maybe [OH]'s parents..." I went ragey: "You understand that traditionally when people have baby showers they like to have their friends there, right? Why would you volunteer to throw a baby shower for me without taking into consideration the people that he and I actually would want to attend? And why would you volunteer if you don't have the financial means to see it through?"
I'm not upset that she can't afford it, but I am upset that she was like, SUPER insistent on throwing one just a month ago... and apparently just does not get how humans work or something. I know so many women are just ragey about their MILs but my mom alone is just freaking... so... ugh that it makes my MIL amazing in comparison.
This weekend we bought more zipper pajamas at Carters, the letters for his name for the nursery wall, some beginning storage and decorations, and I cleaned the house. Now I have chili in the crockpot for dinner. I can't figure out what to do with myself!
H has been using every excuse to get out of the house this weekend (or st least it feels like it) he had overnight watch on Saturday, he helped people move on Sunday, ran to the store to get paint, ran to the restaurant to get takeout, and just now ran to the store to get groceries. I know this just sounds so petty, and he was just trying to be nice and do chores for me, but I'm so tired of Him running off and leaving me with the dogs.
My DH woke up this morning "sick" which always means that he turns into a big baby. But.. apparently his is not sick enough to cancel his golf tee time. I swear, if he comes back and starts complaining tonight about how he is sick I will throat punch him.
Pumpkin Spice Gone to Far| Jan '17 September Siggy Challenge
Due 1/21/17
Team Blue ~ Jan. 20
DS born 9/4/12
MMC July 2015
MMC January 2016
Team Blue ~ Jan. 20
DS born 9/4/12
MMC July 2015
MMC January 2016
Team Blue ~ Jan. 20
DS born 9/4/12
MMC July 2015
MMC January 2016
Team Blue ~ Jan. 20
DS born 9/4/12
MMC July 2015
MMC January 2016
@vgempis Wow, her behavior is a bit strange. I'm a FTM but someone leaving a two week old for hours with someone so she could sleep...then actually using that time to run around town....makes me a little nervous. Maybe she needed some "me" time which is completely understandable, maybe she is having some postpartum hormones but why did she feel the need to hide that (maybe she is self-conscious about wanting "me" time?)? Also, if she is having postpartum issues she may need someone to talk to.
Whatever the case may be, her lack of communication is a HUGE red flag to me. I hope everything works out for the best.
I went back to sleep, but haven't been feeling well all day. I took my OTC Diclegis AND a Zofran, but neither is helping. Trying to work while feeling like this is not going well... I'm so unfocused and I just feel like garbage.
At this point, eating causes some serious anxiety because I just assume it's coming back up or going to make me feel unbelievably nauseated. I know it's worth it in the long run, but feeling like this for 20 more weeks is not cool. I am so sick of being sick.
So today mom asked sister if she wants to be involved or not and sister texts me that she'd "do anything in the whole world" for me but work with mom, how should she handle it? I told her by not involving me. She proceeded to pick a fight with me about MY lack of communication if I was upset (omg how would a sane person NOT be stressed when it's 4 weeks out and you don't have a location??) and I pretty much told her to fuck off and go away deal with mom or don't but I had quite enough of that convo so BYE.
edit: sorry if that's gigantic
My sister was super gung-ho about throwing the shower then she tried to pawn off all event details on me (when, where, whose invited, etc etc etc) and I just kept saying "hmm yeah I don't know you might want to talk to X or X about that". She ended up giving it over to my SIL, who proceeded to decide that the entire month of October was not possible because she wants to meet up with some random guy she just met in Iowa for a few weeks (who the eff even does that???). Then my best friend asks if November 19th would work. Uhh... no. I love you girl but that's the weekend before T-gives and most everyone will be traveling then or soon to another place for the holidays.
Like I said - either throw one or don't, I really don't care. These are the same people who did not plan nor attend my bachelorette party or bridal shower so I already know they are all terrible with this kind of stuff. I just don't feel like getting my feelings hurt over it.
My actual MBF - I can't stand my mom and her opinion on my baby's name. I have quasi settled on a first name, it just so happens to be the only name that she likes. She would be so overly dramatic about the names that I picked that I could hardly stand to even talk about the baby with her. I was just on the phone with her and baby names came up (why didn't I just ignore it and start a new topic?) and I told her some of my middle names and she again begins to say all this crazy shit. She said one of my names is a name they use in the "barrio" and that I need to start picking good names. (Which first of all, barrio? Seriously? What exactly is she trying to say there?The middle name in question is Kennedy). Then I hear my brother in the background say "What about the name X?" and my mom starts talking about how beautiful that name is, blah blah blah!!!!!!!!!!!! And it's a name that I don't even like! IT'S MY BABY I WILL NAME HER WHATEVER I WANT, DO YOU UNDERSTAND THAT!?!?!?!?
I'm now considering changing my quasi-settled first name BECAUSE she likes it and I don't want there to be any doubt that I chose the name because she like it. I want to know that I chose a name because I liked.