Let's get real... Need a little advise!

lindsaym2106 · September 2016

hello fellow moms to be, I am 23 weeks and I am told this is the time when I am supposed to let's say... Want to get it in all the time. But I am having difficulty getting in the mood. I love my husband so much but I can't get in the mood. Then we we start, we can't find any position that either I am comfortable or he is. Things feel different and its makes it weird during sex. I need advise!! Anyone else have or had this problem?

Christinaruth74 · September 2016

I hate the generalization that pregnancy makes you want it. I feel like it's always put a pressure on me to perform, but pregnant sex just isn't my fave. Some women love it and do absolutely want it often during pregnancy, but a lot of us just don't.
I think it's totally normal to not be feeling up to get frisky more often these days... For me, there's loads of pressure down there which makes it incredible uncomfortable, and there only about 2 positions we can do it in comfortably-ish. Plus, there still nausea and exhaustion ...

Just try to remember this is temporary! And after the baby is born, wine will help!

Austenista · September 2016

@Christinaruth74 plus one to this. My hips and muscles hurt and I just don't want to either. This is temporary, though.

swhiddon33 · September 2016

You're not alone! Don't pressure yourself into it if you're just not feeling it and don't feel you have to excuse yourself for not being into it. There are many ways to be intimate with your man (and actually many are not based around sex at all) to keep yourselves close while expecting baby. Husband will understand. If you hold off til after baby's arrival, just remember it's a temporary hiatus. Clearly y'all had zero issues before (wink wink) or else you wouldn't be here now! You'll return to that normalcy!

cayaylonglegs · September 2016

I haven't had sex in months. It makes DH uncomfortable and I haven't been in the mood. To echo what @swhiddon33 said there are other ways to be intimate. As long as both of your needs are being met in a mutually agreeable way don't worry about the temporary intercourse hiatus.

sourlemon · September 2016

I second the "you don't have to have sex during pregnancy". Whether you can't get in the mood, it isn't comfortable, or you medically are not allowed (like me), just talk to your husband and figure out other ways to stay close.

slartybartfast · September 2016

I can only advise you to ask for "advice" - not "advise"

cjt121413 · September 2016

You got some great advice. If you stick around (which would be great!) check out the regular posts we have to give advice, ask questions, etc.

Also, a friendly suggestion that you change your user name so people can identify you as something other than another random bride to be.

DumbledoresArmy · September 2016

If it helps, I absolutely have not wanted to have sex this ENTIRE pregnancy - until this week (26 weeks). Now all the sudden I want it. Bad. Just listen to your body, there is no right or wrong here.

yellingbanana · September 2016

I didn't want to at all with my 2nd. And even now, there is only 1 comfortable position for me. Laying on my side. That's it. We are actually waiting for DH to get tested for zika, he was in FL and came back with cold/flu even though we can't find any mosquito bites.

lindsaym2106 · September 2016

I have actually been trying to figure out how the change the name .....how do i do that?

cjt121413 · September 2016

Knottie29389287 said:

I have actually been trying to figure out how the change the name .....how do i do that?

I think you have to log in to the Knot, but I'm not 100% sure.

Toller · September 2016

cjt121413 said:

Knottie29389287 said:

I have actually been trying to figure out how the change the name .....how do i do that?

I think you have to log in to the Knot, but I'm not 100% sure.

Yes- under settings or something similar

jptrumptone · September 2016

@Knottie29389287: You can change your screen name for The Knot. Login with the same info there that you use on the the bump. In the upper right hand corner, you will see a menu called "my knot tools". Choose account settings from there and you should be able to change your screen name.

Austenista · September 2016

@Knottie29389287 @jptrumptone This works, I recently did it. Give it about 30 minutes and it will take effect.

dmontgo · September 2016

In general I have a high drive, so pregnancy has been an interesting season of life. There are weeks when I feel like I could have sex everyday, and then there are weeks where I feel so tired that I don't want to put in the effort. So, we've embraced the power of quickies. Sex is important for us, and it helps DH feel loved (he loves the bump!

), so I don't mind having a quickie. He's very caring and attentive though, so it's not like he's begging me when I'm obviously destroyed from exhaustion. But it's been a happy medium for us. Quickies = magic.

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