Panick attacks!

JBaker716 · September 2016

I have been experiencing sever panick attacks for the last 3 weeks! They will come while I am sound asleep out of know where! I am working with my midwife to get some help! I was just wondering if anyone else had any ideas or recommendations for this! I had anxiety attacks with my DD, she is now 5 and haven't had anything this severe since! Help!!! IT IS A SUFFOCATING FEEL WHEN IT HAPPENS!

ceclarlinetlo · September 2016

I'm glad your seeking help for the attacks - I had weekly therapy from January to June and I am still taking my anti-anxiety medication that I started in February. I'm in a much better place now.

emy730 · September 2016

I take BuSpar for my anxiety, and it's safe for pregnancy. I think working with a therapist is a great idea too. Good luck!

ThePax89 · September 2016

I haven't been having full blown panic attacks, but I do wake up panicking and having nightmares 1-4 times/night and it's terrifying.
I would recommend seeing a psychiatrist. Panic attacks are terrible. I'm so sorry.

Kurtni · September 2016

I am getting close to the time where I lost my first baby and I cannot control my anxiety either. I've had one panic attack, but more just constant intrusive thoughts.

I think working with your midwife is the best thing you can do, it's just so beyond your control. The only advice I have is to make sure your SO knows what you need when you're having a panic attack. For example, I need my husband not to talk to me or ask me a million questions trying to fix "the problem" and to just be silently supportive. It makes it a lot easier on me when we are on the same page.

TinaBelcher · September 2016

I'm perpetually medicated for an anxiety disorder but highly suggest anyone see a therapist, whether you're experiencing full blown anxiety attacks or just feeling too on-edge/ jumpy. It can ONLY help, worst that'll happen is you're out $50-100, spend an hour talking about yourself and get a clean bill of mental health!

Knottie1443924966 · September 2016

Urgh I'm so sorry this is happening to you.

You know how there is a small sign/feeling that they're coming? When that happens start to breath and grasp something that is real. The trick is to stay in your reality.

If you pass the point of grasping reality keep breathing, sit down, try and stay calm, know that it will pass, dont believe that youre in infinite time and seriously just concentrate on your breathing.

Can you figure out the trigger? Do they have a specialist you can see at your hospital. Most hospitals provide someone specifically for prenatal care.

My hearts with you.

emy730 · September 2016

TinaBelcher said:

I'm perpetually medicated for an anxiety disorder but highly suggest anyone see a therapist, whether you're experiencing full blown anxiety attacks or just feeling too on-edge/ jumpy. It can ONLY help, worst that'll happen is you're out $50-100, spend an hour talking about yourself and get a clean bill of mental health!

Yep, I totally agree!

ceclarlinetlo · September 2016

*3rd here for therapy - I feel like the medicine I take brought me to a place where I was able to function but the therapy is really what helped me get to a healthy place.

aishmc · September 2016

TinaBelcher said:

I'm perpetually medicated for an anxiety disorder but highly suggest anyone see a therapist, whether you're experiencing full blown anxiety attacks or just feeling too on-edge/ jumpy. It can ONLY help, worst that'll happen is you're out $50-100, spend an hour talking about yourself and get a clean bill of mental health!

Yes yes yes!

Also, I've tried all the anxiety meds over the years and the only one that really works for me is not allowed for pregnancy, so I have been having to make so much effort to communicate with my therapist, my husband, friends, and family when I'm feeling overwhelmed.

My husband has been great in that I can tell him I'm starting to panic and he'll help me some of my therapists recommendations. We'll go to another room completely, he'll make sure it's quiet or turn the lights down a little, get me a glass of water, etc. It's important to try to break the cycle of whatever thoughts I'm having before it becomes a full on panic attack and it's a lot of work. Something we usually talk about is the fact that regardless of whatever I'm worried about happening in the coming days, weeks, or months, that I need to do my best to calm down because I don't want my baby getting too stressed. It's not meant to be a guilt thing, but knowing that stress hormones cross the placenta helps motivate me to try my best to keep calm.

mommywesley · September 2016

I wasn't sure if I should start a new thread, so thought I'd try this first.

I am struggling lately during the day with anxiety. It sounds so stupid but I've found myself jealous of all the time DH spends with his coworkers vs with us. The biggest thing I'm struggling with is for the first time in our marriage his main coworkers are women. So I just am driving myself insane during the day thinking about him being with other women for 8+hrs a day and with me only 3 or 4! His type of work isn't just a 9-5 and stop either, so he's constantly getting chats and messages in the evenings and weekends too and I am just in tears daily.

I am SO LOST on how to deal with this. I am not used to feeling jealous and I don't know what to do. It's gotten to the point this week that I've been so anxious and nervous I've had an upset stomach and no appetite.

I've been talking to DH about it, and it helps to talk it out with him, but it's just not going away. I don't know what to do!

TinaBelcher · September 2016

@mommywesley therapy!! If you talk it out with a professional you'll cut the time it takes to deal with it down sooooo much. The ways anxiety manifest can't be controlled but a counselor or therapist (like a real one, not a priest or whatever) will be so helpful in dealing with it in a healthy (and fast) way

KRB22 · September 2016

@mommywesley I'm struggling with similar anxiety lately too. Not exactly the same, but I am extra sensitive, particularly about feeling left out by my sisters and friends. For example, I bawled my eyes out the other night because my family was barbecuing at my parents house and my mom and sisters had all planned the menu and gone shopping together and hadn't consulted me or asked if I wanted to go shopping with them. I knew I was being irrational, but I couldn't shake the feeling that they were intentionally excluding me, and I kept going around in circles in my head trying to figure out why they were avoiding me.

I've dealt with anxiety in the past, though I haven't ever taken medication for it. I know right now most of this is driven by hormones, and probably to some extent the built in stress of being pregnant and becoming a mom for the first time. I am good about recognizing the signs and generally try not to suppress my feelings, but at the same time I do also try to listen to my inner voice of reason.

I also still see a therapist a couple of times a month, which I think is helpful for me to make sure the anxiety is not progressing to a more serious point. If you feel like the anxiety is interfering with your day to day life and potentially having further effects, it might be worth seeing a professional, but I know that is to some extent a personal decision. It does help me to talk through things with someone who's totally objective. My therapist has also taught me some breathing techniques to help cope with difficult situations - and the breath work usually does help!

In addition to breathing, if I'm feeling particularly anxious I usually try to reset, either by taking a warm shower/bath, lying down quietly for a few minutes, etc. The other night I spent about 10 minutes just stretching and felt infinitely better afterwards - I realized I'd been holding a lot of tension in my back and I'm sure that contributed to my anxious feelings.

Sorry for the long-winded post! Basically all of this is to say I can sympathize!

mommywesley · September 2016

@TinaBelcher Therapy after a couple weeks? I guess I'm just extremely out of my element, I would maybe consider that if I'd had issues for months but it never even crossed my mind to even think about that this early on...Def will be thinking about it now though ty.

@KRB22 yes, I KNOW my emotions/hormones are amplifying the anxiety in this situation. It's why I feel so silly saying it out loud and admitting it. It's irrational and I KNOW that it's irrational but I can't stop thinking about it! Ugh!

ceclarlinetlo · September 2016

@mommywesley I second @tinabelcher with a suggestion for therapy - even though it's only been a few weeks this kind of anxiety could have long term repercussions for your marriage and it would be better to nip it in the bud. Also life is too short to be miserable with anxiety. I went to a therapist from January to June (Not saying you'll need that much time - I have a chronic life long anxiety issue) and I wish I had started going sooner.

mommywesley · September 2016

I'll look into it. I'm worried if I'm this stressed currently what it will/would be like after baby is born and I have even more hormones and lack of sleep to contend with. It's like I'm begging for PPD!

AshleySparkle720 · September 2016

@mommywesley I have similar issues with DH that are extremely magnified when I'm pregnant. Talking with DH is great, but sometimes it takes an outside person to listen and help you process your feelings. I waited too long for therapy and now am hypersensitive to everything DH says and does which is not good for our marriage at all.

TinaBelcher · September 2016

@mommywesley heck yes therapy when you're feeling fine even- preventative maintenance! Seriously, if you're feeling out of control it'll be so much easier to get back to normal with help, there's no reason to suffer through when a professional could be so helpful!

KRB22 · September 2016

@mommywesley I definitely know that feeling! But even if you know your fears are unfounded, your feelings are real and ultimately you need to deal with them somehow. As long as you're not acting out based on your anxiety (which it doesn't sound like you are at all), you shouldn't feel silly talking about your feelings. This is definitely the benefit of talking with a professional - no judgment, no emotional investment, etc. You might only need a couple of sessions to talk through what you're feeling and learn some ways to cope.

lydia-deetz · September 2016

@mommywesley, I don't have specific advice except to say I know from experience that feelings of jealousy really are a monster. They can get out of control pretty quickly if you let them. It's good that you guys are talking. Maybe you can come up with some ways to make you feel more comfortable, like more check-ins with you throughout the day or open access to his phone. Because really, those feelings are powerful enough that you can go from feeling uncomfortable one second to making some pretty hefty allegations the next second.

hugs

mommywesley · September 2016

Thanks guys, I'll keep you posted. I just feel like it's so unfair to DH, his job is so stressful as it is, he doesn't need this heaped on top!

BAJDesigns · September 2016

Anxiety can be so brutal. I have been on a low dose anxiety med for a few years and being pregnant is my first long period without it. I think if you have the means, seeing a therapist can't hurt.

I can can almost always feel my anxiety coming on before it gets out of control. When repetitive thoughts get stuck on a loop in my head, my chest starts to tighten. I have been prioritizing paying close attention to my cues and stopping whatever I'm doing for a little "self care break". Make a cup of tea, start a task that redirects my mind. Get out my watercolors, clean something. I know it is different for everyone, but something about recognizing my anxiety for what it is and both physically and mentally redirecting myself helps a lot.

mommywesley · September 2016

I said I would keep you guys updated :-) so I talked to DH more tonight and how the trouble I'm having is with the whole not knowing anything. I don't know any of his coworkers names, or how his team works etc. So while he is very vague when I ask like what are you doing for lunch, and he says he's running across the street to get something but he doesn't fill me in on any of the details, like the company is buying them lunch and so I shouldn't have a heart attack when I see (on his computer at home) him asking a colleague when they are getting lunch! He is such a non-talker that this is just him. So we discussed him filling me in more with his day, telling me office gossip all of the stuff that I (very talkative woman here lol) used to share with him daily when I worked. It's just the unknown that is scary, so I truly feel this will help.

And of course he felt awful like he was failing me by not being more talkative and causing me stress/anxiety which in turn made me feel awful for making him feel awful. Lol such a crazy cycle!

I'm going to pay attention to how the next week goes and if things settle, great, if they don't and I'm still having irrational fears/jealousy issues I'm going to look into the therapy route; but I am feeling much better after he and I talked and knowing he is going to put forth effort to keep me more in the loop.

Oh, and can I say I'm kind of excited to hear about office gossip?! It's been over 2years since I've gotten to be in on office gossip!

ceclarlinetlo · September 2016

@mommywesley I think that's a great plan. I love that your DH listened to your concerns and took them seriously and is going to work with you to keep you both happy. FX this is a simple fix and you don't have any more anxiety - but even if it's not there is no shame in getting help to get over the hump. Thanks for keeping us posted

(I won't mind hearing some office gossip either if you get anything juicy lol)

AshleySparkle720 · September 2016

@mommywesley I'm so glad you two were able to talk it out. Even if it doesn't fix all anxiety it's so helpful to be able to communicate with your spouse!

aishmc · September 2016

@mommywesley so happy you were able to discuss and come up with a plan in a nonconfrontational manner. Not always easy to do with husbands. The office gossip is a nice added bonus!

mommywesley · September 2016

So far things are going much better. I'm not stressing or crying all day lol. No real office gossip to share yet, I'm bummed about that LOL.

I'm still feeling restless till he gets home, like I have lost time to make up for. Not stressed so much, but like I can't stop doing the math in my head. Double the amount of time at work with his female coworkers than with his family and even less than that with just us 2.

Now I'm just thinking about when we move the office down stairs and that is what is stressing me a bit. It's one thing to be in the room right next to me on the computer vs downstairs :-( not much I can do about that I just think it's all of it right now all at once in my head is a lot.

I feel better. Much better than I was. I was having some super hard moments of real freak outs and that's over now. I'm still jealous, but I feel Iike it's less and less each day. It helps that DH is being so sweet about it all and is helping me work through it.

Thank you ladies for helping me through this, I really think it helped me to tell someone other than my DH too.

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