I guess my confession is that while the timing sucked, I think the girl deserves to rant about her feelings . I may not agree with it and I may feel for the people who are dealing with worse more, but she's feeling the way she's feeling in this moment and was looking for a place to vent.
Sure, but after @Xstatic3333 calmly mentioned the loss, she should have let the thread die out or apologize for bad timing. Nope, she came back to defend herself. Not cool. She rubbed me the wrong way.
I guess my confession is that while the timing sucked, I think the girl deserves to rant about her feelings . I may not agree with it and I may feel for the people who are dealing with worse more, but she's feeling the way she's feeling in this moment and was looking for a place to vent.
Sure, but after @Xstatic3333 calmly mentioned the loss, she should have let the thread die out or apologize for bad timing. Nope, she came back to defend herself. Not cool. She rubbed me the wrong way.
Agree, it was the timing, not specifically the content. I know there was a good discussion about sex disappointment a few weeks ago in which all views were ultimately respected. Plus, we don't know her! If it was a regular poster it would have gone down very differently. Then again, a regular poster wouldn't have done it.
I guess my confession is that while the timing sucked, I think the girl deserves to rant about her feelings . I may not agree with it and I may feel for the people who are dealing with worse more, but she's feeling the way she's feeling in this moment and was looking for a place to vent.
I completely agree that she's entitled to her feelings. I can even understand being sad that whatever relationship/experiences they looked forward may be gone.
But I can't get behind being so disappointed in the sex of your child that one considers having another child that could possibly jeopardize their financial stability as a family. I mean, that seems extreme to me.
I guess my confession is that while the timing sucked, I think the girl deserves to rant about her feelings . I may not agree with it and I may feel for the people who are dealing with worse more, but she's feeling the way she's feeling in this moment and was looking for a place to vent.
I'm sorry but I disagree with this. If she were feeling upset over something reasonable sure but to me complaining about your child's sex not being what you want it to be is just wrong on so many levels. To make it worse it's just insensitive to compare it to the pain felt with a loss like she did in her comment where she brought it back to the top.
I get that it's natural to have a preference towards having one sex but I feel like it's something to be disappointed over for a couple minutes and then realize how awesome it is that you're creating a baby of any sex and get excited for this new life.
I just hope her child never realizes what a disappointment he was to her. Kids are perceptive and I damn sure realized at a young age that I was 2nd class to my parents once my little brother was born since my brother would "carry on the family name" and could be part of all the 5 generations of men photos etc... when I couldn't.
Me: 33 | DH: 34 Married: October, 19, 2015 EDD 2/22/17 DS1 born on 3/2/17 EDD 3/8/20 DS2 born on 3/10/20 EDD 11/24/23 (Formerly Marriedhamstermom Feb ‘17)
I personally have never understood sex disappointment at all. I never had a preference one way or the other what the sex of any of my baby was. It just baffles me.
I guess my confession is that while the timing sucked, I think the girl deserves to rant about her feelings . I may not agree with it and I may feel for the people who are dealing with worse more, but she's feeling the way she's feeling in this moment and was looking for a place to vent.
I completely agree that she's entitled to her feelings. I can even understand being sad that whatever relationship/experiences they looked forward may be gone.
But I can't get behind being so disappointed in the sex of your child that one considers having another child that could possibly jeopardize their financial stability as a family. I mean, that seems extreme to me.
Yes definitely, that was strange to me. I totally understand people being upset when comparing the two posts. I feel heartbroken for one and don't know the other. And I understand wanting to knock it off the page. I just was feeling for her a bit while reading through and decided to voice my flammable confession.
She can be disappointed in the sex but when she compared it to a loss really irked me. I've had a loss and I know many other ladies here have. *TW* My SIL lost 2 babies, one at 20w and one at full term, both little girls. Then she just had her adoption of a little boy fall through because the mom changed her mind 3 weeks after birth. I was so praying that would be their take home baby. I feel bad sometimes that I'm pregnant when she can't have her babies, but she is so excited for her new niece. *end tw
If she were at least a regular and didn't make an AW post maybe some could commiserate. But she hasn't posted anywhere on the bump since March and then the comments that were made. Just no.
I guess my confession is that while the timing sucked, I think the girl deserves to rant about her feelings . I may not agree with it and I may feel for the people who are dealing with worse more, but she's feeling the way she's feeling in this moment and was looking for a place to vent.
I completely agree that she's entitled to her feelings. I can even understand being sad that whatever relationship/experiences they looked forward may be gone.
But I can't get behind being so disappointed in the sex of your child that one considers having another child that could possibly jeopardize their financial stability as a family. I mean, that seems extreme to me.
Yes definitely, that was strange to me. I totally understand people being upset when comparing the two posts. I feel heartbroken for one and don't know the other. And I understand wanting to knock it off the page. I just was feeling for her a bit while reading through and decided to voice my flammable confession.
I won't flame you @homemake. I hope my flaming for the day is over. I just wish she'd let it stay off the page in the first place.
I can understand her disappointment. However, i cannot understand that she would be so uncompassionate towards someone who is experiencing such a devestatingly heartbreaking loss to even attempt to compare the two as if they are on any kind of similar level! Im also horrified that she felt saying that her sister in law who has also just experienced a loss apologised to her because she was disappointed thinking that it backs up her case!
I can understand her disappointment. However, i cannot understand that she would be so uncompassionate towards someone who is experiencing such a devestatingly heartbreaking loss to even attempt to compare the two as if they are on any kind of similar level! Im also horrified that she felt saying that her sister in law who has also just experienced a loss apologised to her because she was disappointed thinking that it backs up her case!
When in fact it did the opposite, just made her sound even more insensitive. If that's possible.
I missed most of the follow up with the gender disappointment, because in the beginning I felt sympathetic. If I had read what some of you are saying here came after, I think all sympathy would pass.
Cinnabons were one of my only cravings with my twins and my Mom had to drive with me to a mall 45 minutes away to get one since the only other option was the airport, lol.
Married - 7/29/06 Ben and Maggie - 4/10/09 Mia - 6/16/11 Surprise! due 2/23/17
An actual FFFC? I have had multiple dreams now involving another man swooping in and taking care of me and my kids because my husband wasn't. There were, um, sexy parts too, but the main theme seemed much more like that Shawn Mendez song "Treat you Better" It was this anonymous guy that looked like a TV character a couple times, until a couple nights ago when it was a lender I work with.
Married - 7/29/06 Ben and Maggie - 4/10/09 Mia - 6/16/11 Surprise! due 2/23/17
Don't look now but there is another inappropriately timed new post from another random. Maybe if no one responds it will just go away on its own....
Which one is that? I dint see it. I wanna read it dammit!
Edit: Ooh nevermind. It's the tubes tied one. I think we ARE getting pranked. Let's just ignore it. They'll leave us alone of they see we're not reacting to them.
Is it rude as hell random posts free for all lately? That's when you know it's just people looking for attention who have never bothered to learn or get to know the community before posting inappropriate BS.
************* First BFP: 12/16/13 EDD: 08/23/14 Baby BOY born: 08/29/14
I will say though, that I don't think the topic of permanent BC after kids necessarily needs to be a taboo topic in general here, when in the proper forum. This particular post is an obnoxious AW and I don't say that to defend it in any way.
sorry @Xstatic3333 my post to her was definitely intending to say "don't talk about that ish here"...but I was definitely only talking to her, not the women of the board
sorry @Xstatic3333 my post to her was definitely intending to say "don't talk about that ish here"...but I was definitely only talking to her, not the women of the board
No worries @srscott3! I figured that was what you meant. I just wouldn't want a reg here considering that to feel like they couldn't mention it in, say, a discussion about their birth plan or something.
While probably not very flame worthy, my confession is you guys scared me at first. But now, after lurking, posting and responding in some "generic-ish" threads, I'm really beginning you like it here more and more. I can't imagine the format of a board being any other way. With that being said, every time we get a new random post, I roll my eyes, mutter "FFS" under my breath, and wish we could have a screening process before anyone posts ANYthing on here. Like, ya know, an interview lol.
Edit: I meant a screening process for new posters.
Sorry for posting, guys. I hadn't caught up to other threads and didnt see that it's been an all day team effort to bump it down.
I'm near tears and it's NOT the hormones.
My FFFC goes along with the common theme of conception today.
We were nervous to pull the trigger on TTC. One night, I told H to, uh, empty himself inside me. He pulled out and I got crabby and said, "You just couldn't do it, could you?". So the next time, he did and then was just like, "I can, and I did."
My husband got me pregnant on a dare and now we're having twins.
My FFFC: I hate the "cloth vs disposals diapers" thread. I've never actually read it because the whole topic is boring to me.
I like it bc I want to CD but it feels super overwhelming. so many options! also, I want support bc my FIL is trying to pressure us to use disposables. Hubs wants cloth but I'm getting sick of hearing I can't do cloth.
I think the deals thread is boring so in staying away :-)
Another FFFC: I don't see anything wrong with discussing birth control on here. I get that the timing is bad, but we're all also posting about weekend plans and cloth diapers and whatever else. Maybe it wouldn't have caused such and uproar if it weren't right on the heels of the "depressed and guilty" post, but again, I don't think it's offensive or inappropriate to talk about when you're done having kids.
Re: FFFC* 9/2
But I can't get behind being so disappointed in the sex of your child that one considers having another child that could possibly jeopardize their financial stability as a family. I mean, that seems extreme to me.
Big Bro 7/14/13
Little Bro 2/6/17
I get that it's natural to have a preference towards having one sex but I feel like it's something to be disappointed over for a couple minutes and then realize how awesome it is that you're creating a baby of any sex and get excited for this new life.
I just hope her child never realizes what a disappointment he was to her. Kids are perceptive and I damn sure realized at a young age that I was 2nd class to my parents once my little brother was born since my brother would "carry on the family name" and could be part of all the 5 generations of men photos etc... when I couldn't.
Married: October, 19, 2015
EDD 2/22/17
EDD 3/8/20
EDD 11/24/23
(Formerly Marriedhamstermom Feb ‘17)
Yes definitely, that was strange to me. I totally understand people being upset when comparing the two posts. I feel heartbroken for one and don't know the other. And I understand wanting to knock it off the page. I just was feeling for her a bit while reading through and decided to voice my flammable confession.
She can be disappointed in the sex but when she compared it to a loss really irked me. I've had a loss and I know many other ladies here have. *TW* My SIL lost 2 babies, one at 20w and one at full term, both little girls. Then she just had her adoption of a little boy fall through because the mom changed her mind 3 weeks after birth. I was so praying that would be their take home baby. I feel bad sometimes that I'm pregnant when she can't have her babies, but she is so excited for her new niece. *end tw
If she were at least a regular and didn't make an AW post maybe some could commiserate. But she hasn't posted anywhere on the bump since March and then the comments that were made. Just no.
Married: 9/2013
Love my LEO!!
TTC #1: 9/2015
BFP: 2/1/16 MC 2/8/16 @ 5wks
BFP: 5/22/16 RAINBOW BABY
EDD: 1/30/2017 *IT'S A GIRL!!!!*
Kirsten Grace 1/20/17
When in fact it did the opposite, just made her sound even more insensitive. If that's possible.
ME: 25, DH: 27
TTC #1 since 09/2015
Miscarriage @ 10 wks 02/28/2016
BFP 05/28/2016!
Big Bro 7/14/13
Little Bro 2/6/17
Cinnabons were one of my only cravings with my twins and my Mom had to drive with me to a mall 45 minutes away to get one since the only other option was the airport, lol.
Ben and Maggie - 4/10/09
Mia - 6/16/11
Surprise! due 2/23/17
Ben and Maggie - 4/10/09
Mia - 6/16/11
Surprise! due 2/23/17
Edit: Ooh nevermind. It's the tubes tied one. I think we ARE getting pranked. Let's just ignore it. They'll leave us alone of they see we're not reacting to them.
ME: 25, DH: 27
TTC #1 since 09/2015
Miscarriage @ 10 wks 02/28/2016
BFP 05/28/2016!
First BFP: 12/16/13
EDD: 08/23/14
Baby BOY born: 08/29/14
I will say though, that I don't think the topic of permanent BC after kids necessarily needs to be a taboo topic in general here, when in the proper forum. This particular post is an obnoxious AW and I don't say that to defend it in any way.
Edit: I meant a screening process for new posters.
Me: 37 - H: 39
TTC#1: 01/2016
BFP: 06/18/2016 - EDD: 02/20/2017 - Born: 01/27/2017
Me: 37 - H: 39
TTC#1: 01/2016
BFP: 06/18/2016 - EDD: 02/20/2017 - Born: 01/27/2017
I'm near tears and it's NOT the hormones.
My FFFC goes along with the common theme of conception today.
We were nervous to pull the trigger on TTC. One night, I told H to, uh, empty himself inside me. He pulled out and I got crabby and said, "You just couldn't do it, could you?". So the next time, he did and then was just like, "I can, and I did."
My husband got me pregnant on a dare and now we're having twins.
I got knocked up on my 38th birthday. I am pretty sure I remember telling him I was too tired, but "It's your birthday!" got us in this situation.
Ben and Maggie - 4/10/09
Mia - 6/16/11
Surprise! due 2/23/17
I think the deals thread is boring so in staying away :-)