June 2016 Moms

Idiot husband rant

i'm so fucking pissed right now. I went out for 2.5 hours and left over 5 oz of breast milk for the baby. My mom fed her and then my husband decided to feed her AGAIN an hour and a half later for no fucking reason, with frozen breast milk that I was saving. Oh wait there was a reason...because every time the baby makes a noise he decides to shut her up by giving her milk. 

Re: Idiot husband rant

  • Sounds like my DH!  Every time my LO cries he swears he's hungry!!! No! He just ate!! He's telling you he doesn't want to sit on the couch and stare at the TV he wants to play and talk and do baby stuff!!!

     It's time for him to get with the program and learn how to soothe the baby because I can see this getting old real fast.  

    Also- he loves to let him nap right before bed time instead of engaging with him... Then I can't get him down until about 11pm, while DH goes to bed.  I'm back at work now so that's not gonna work out! I made him stay up and experience what happens when he does that crap and he was less than thrilled! 

    I feel your pain :(
  • Yeah DH had to care for Preston 100% the last two days cause of my shoulder and was not happy about how long MOTN feedings take or the fact that he will not be happy in his rock n play the whole time he is awake which is something around 2 hours in between naps these days.
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  • My husband is super happy to be helping with feedings buuuut he has a horrible habit of leaving out bottles of breastmilk if he has misjudged whether Damien is actually hungry. He's done it twice now and by the time I'm aware of it, it's too late to save it. I never thought I would shed tears for milk! He also doesn't quite get yet that things like putting him down for a nap aren't always just as simple as putting him in his crib or rock-n-play with a pacifier or that you really do need to use a revolving door of soothing techniques when he starts fussing (and isn't hungry or tired) until you find one that works and sticking with one for ages that isn't working isn't always the best plan of action. That said, I'm learning that I need to let go too and let him figure things out on his own sometimes. A friend of mine always told her husband what to do and how to do it and now she can't go out without being bombarded with texts and calls about what to do with their children (who are now 5 and 7).

    @adiaz132003 I hope your shoulder makes a speedy recovery!! 
  • Did the baby actually eat the milk husband offered after 1.5 hours? If so, it's not like it was wasted. 
  • RMLandy said:
    Did the baby actually eat the milk husband offered after 1.5 hours? If so, it's not like it was wasted. 
    The point is there was no reason for a breast fed baby to have more than 5 oz in a less than 3 hour time period. Sure the baby drank it but she was over fed and with pumped milk there is only so much a woman can make. There was no reason to go into the freezer stash.



  • Yah, things like that are annoying, but at least he's watching his baby and taking care of her the way he thinks is best.  It's ok to be annoyed, but keep it in perspective and move on.
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  • @huskypuppy14 I don't think we know the point since we aren't the ones who are ranting. However, MY point is, I think she's overreacting. It's silly to be "fucking pissed" at your husband for feeding your baby. If he had just wasted the milk, that would be a different story. 
  • My husband often thinks LO is hungry just because she's upset, he's still getting into the groove and becoming comfortable soothing her without feeding her or giving her a paci.

    I understand being upset about wasted breastmilk but at least he was being attentive as opposed to not feeding her and letting her cry.
    Me (31) & DH (32)
    Married 9/27/2014
    DD Born 6/23/16
    Baby #2 Due 3/7/20
  • Yes I definitely overreacted!! I just get so mad that he can't understand he has to PLAY with the baby, not just feed and change her.
  • Yes I definitely overreacted!! I just get so mad that he can't understand he has to PLAY with the baby, not just feed and change her.
    Yeah, I think it's tough for new dads to understand the concept of "playing" with a baby that clearly can't play back. Let him know that talking to the baby, reading (even if it's his book not a children's book), going for a walk, or even walking through the house and pointing out things are all ways to "play" with baby. My H felt like a complete idiot for the first few weeks talking to her and spending time with her when she was awake, but he is finally getting more comfortable and does a great job.
    Me (31) & DH (32)
    Married 9/27/2014
    DD Born 6/23/16
    Baby #2 Due 3/7/20
  • My DH is currently taking a sick day from parenting.  He doesn't know what he has so he doesn't want to be around the baby.  His symptoms are a headache and congestion.  Sounds like he's got some allergies to me and is using it as an excuse to lay around and watch football all day. I already hate football season and it's only preseason!!!!!! 

    i guess he doesn't realize we don't get sick days as parents.  Smh.
  • RMLandy said:
    Did the baby actually eat the milk husband offered after 1.5 hours? If so, it's not like it was wasted. 
    The point is there was no reason for a breast fed baby to have more than 5 oz in a less than 3 hour time period. Sure the baby drank it but she was over fed and with pumped milk there is only so much a woman can make. There was no reason to go into the freezer stash.
    Says who? Maybe she was hungry? There's no formula (haha) for how much babies eat; every baby is different. They also have growth spurts and individual preferences that can play a role. If the baby cries, eats, and stops crying, it's not crazy to think baby was hungry!
    TTC since June 2011
    DH: perfect SA
    Me: 30, moderate endo, unexplained infertility
    IUI or IVF in December



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  • xc1148 said:
    RMLandy said:
    Did the baby actually eat the milk husband offered after 1.5 hours? If so, it's not like it was wasted. 
    The point is there was no reason for a breast fed baby to have more than 5 oz in a less than 3 hour time period. Sure the baby drank it but she was over fed and with pumped milk there is only so much a woman can make. There was no reason to go into the freezer stash.
    Says who? Maybe she was hungry? There's no formula (haha) for how much babies eat; every baby is different. They also have growth spurts and individual preferences that can play a role. If the baby cries, eats, and stops crying, it's not crazy to think baby was hungry!
     Not a bad point.  When I was a baby, at around 3 months I ate almost 7 oz in one sitting for a few nights and I drove my mom to add formula to my meals.  Lol. 
  • xc1148 said:
    RMLandy said:
    Did the baby actually eat the milk husband offered after 1.5 hours? If so, it's not like it was wasted. 
    The point is there was no reason for a breast fed baby to have more than 5 oz in a less than 3 hour time period. Sure the baby drank it but she was over fed and with pumped milk there is only so much a woman can make. There was no reason to go into the freezer stash.
    Says who? Maybe she was hungry? There's no formula (haha) for how much babies eat; every baby is different. They also have growth spurts and individual preferences that can play a role. If the baby cries, eats, and stops crying, it's not crazy to think baby was hungry!
     Not a bad point.  When I was a baby, at around 3 months I ate almost 7 oz in one sitting for a few nights and I drove my mom to add formula to my meals.  Lol. 
    I also have to agree with this.  My baby will eat a 3 oz serving two hours after eating a 3 oz serving, so 6 oz within 3 hours.  She'll also eat 2 oz and sleep for 3.5 hours.  I understand the pain of losing pumped milk seemingly unnecessarily, I pump as well, but I also agree babies eat less predictably than we are sometimes led to believe.  

  • Says who? Maybe she was hungry? There's no formula (haha) for how much babies eat; every baby is different. They also have growth spurts and individual preferences that can play a role. If the baby cries, eats, and stops crying, it's not crazy to think baby was hungry!
    Agreed. My son eats 6 ounces every 2-3 hours during the day. And I'm not sure you can overfeed a baby...my son spits the bottle and formula out when he's done or doesn't want it. 
  • i'm so fucking pissed right now. I went out for 2.5 hours and left over 5 oz of breast milk for the baby. My mom fed her and then my husband decided to feed her AGAIN an hour and a half later for no fucking reason, with frozen breast milk that I was saving. Oh wait there was a reason...because every time the baby makes a noise he decides to shut her up by giving her milk. 


    I told my DH about this before I left him alone with DS for the first time as a warning. Attempting to be an awesome dad, he then proceeded to do the complete opposite and only feed DS 3oz in the six hours I was gone! ::sigh::
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