Weekly Benched/TTA Check-In: Week of August 15th

beary67 · August 2016

***General TW that this thread can and will mention MC and loss.***

This is a place for those of us who have already started TTC, but have hit a roadblock and are delaying for whatever reason. You can express your thoughts, feelings, and frustrations on not TTC and connect with others who are in the same boat. TTC can be a long journey, and having to wait makes it feel even longer- even if it is for a good reason. Feel free to resurrect this thread at any point in the week if you have something to say, and treat this like an ongoing conversation.

Benched = involuntarily not NTNP/TTC and are "out of the game," usually due to medical reasons
TTA = avoiding pregnancy by using protection or FAM, usually for non-health-related reasons __________________________________________________________________
Are you benched or TTA?

What brings you here?

How long do you think you'll be here?

How have things been going?

Any R/R/CS?

GTKY: What are you looking forward to this week?

hupp0013 · August 2016

Are you benched or TTA? TTA

What brings you here? We are waiting to TTC for 8 weeks after our vacation to an area with active zika virus transmission.

How long do you think you'll be here? 6 more weeks.

How have things been going? All right. I am glad we have a lot of things planned for the upcoming weeks, so the time should go fast.

Any R/R/CS?

GTKY: What are you looking forward to this week? We have the county fair this week! It is a fifteen minute walk from our house and a big deal in our town! DH and I are also having a big family party this weekend so that should be fun!

beary67 · August 2016

@hupp0013 oh my goodness! Fair food sounds so good right now. Enjoy!

Are you benched or TTA? Benched

What brings you here? Blighted Ovum and D&C on July 20th.

How long do you think you'll be here? I am hopeful this will be my last week (waiting on a provera induced period, so whenever that happens I will no longer be benched).

How have things been going? I am just ready to move on and start trying again. Emotionally, I am doing really well right now. I think having hope that we will be able to try again soon is helping me a lot...

Any R/R/CS? Just waiting for the RE's Office to call back to let me know they have called in my Provera rx. I am hoping I can pick it up today.

GTKY: What are you looking forward to this week? My husband and I got great tickets from his Aunt/Uncle to attend a Tennis Tournament on Thursday. Serena Williams will now be playing there so I'm hoping she will be scheduled for the night we get to go! I'm also looking forward to having NO plans this weekend and catching up on some house projects and just relaxing with my husband.

ShadeofGreen816 · August 2016

@hupp0013 Yes, Fair food = yummmm. Our state fair is going on right now but I've kinda jam packed my week and I'm just not sure if I'll be able to go!

Are you benched or TTA? TTA

What brings you here? Graduate school

How long do you think you'll be here? September!! AF should start any day now and then my next cycle is it!

How have things been going? Ok, I've been pretty damn busy. Plus my BFF had the cutest LO and so I've got my baby fix, plus plenty of horror stories about stitches and pain and not sleeping to help keep me distracted (Obviously I know/knew all this and more, but it helps when its someone you're so close to going through it)

Any R/R/CS? Well, I'm almost done TTA, so I'm super pumped about that. I'm off school until next Wed so that is fun too.

GTKY: What are you looking forward to this week? Too much, almost! Tomorrow is H and my anniversary, Thursday is my birthday and we have plans to go out to eat both nights. Then Saturday we're having a birthday party for me at a friend's house and he's got a pool and hot tub and it should just be a super fun day

I also thought it would be a good idea to tear out my closet last week, because I'm off school and work and have "so much free time..." But that's slowly seeming like its going out the window! So, we'll see how that project goes!

ameliabedelia-2 · August 2016

Are you benched or TTA? benched

What brings you here? A large ovarian cyst that is being drained in a few weeks

How long do you think you'll be here? probably a month or so

How have things been going? blah, I am mad at myself for not having it drained months ago, I would probably be doing a stimulated cycle right now. I thought it would go away on its own (and so did doctor)

Any R/R/CS? just waiting for AF, on day 4 of Provera

GTKY: What are you looking forward to this week? Not much. I am bummed that our vacation plans for the first week in Sept are now shelved do to this cyst issue, so now I am moping.

NYTino24 · August 2016

Are you benched or TTA? TTA

What brings you here?
honeymoon to an area with active Zika

How long do you think you'll be here?
Hopefully only 6 more weeks...doc said to wait 6 months even though we don't have symptoms, but CDC says 8 weeks and I wanna follow that. We will see what DH has to say when we get to that point. He's not informed at all and just wants to listen to the doc. I have had to remind him that waiting one more "month" can mean missing two cycles if the FW is missed.

How have things been going?
We have another couple in our extended group of friends going through the same situation and it was nice to talk to them about it. Her doc said to wait 3 months instead of 2. Either way, that's still less than 6! I am kind of glad to have this time to get stuff in order. I need to start payroll deductions for short term disability when school starts. I am also getting an ear tube put in on Friday and need to get an epidural for my back, which is technically a surgical procedure. So for those reasons, I'm okay with waiting a little more time.

Any R/R/CS?
Nope. I'm glad I've been temping, charting CM, and doing OPKs. FF is like spot on for my cycle now that I've been temping for 4 months and charting AF for 9 months. I just wish I didn't have a false surge around CD 9-10 and delayed ovulation. I mean, it helps when I'm waiting because I'm not going through as many eggs, but still...it's a tease.

GTKY: What are you looking forward to this week?
I'm not looking forward to changing my name, but I wanna check all of that stuff off my list before school starts. Still waiting on the marriage certificate though. So visits to Social Security and the DMV it is!

@beary67, @ShadeofGreen816 Yay for getting in the game!

Image: https://us.v-cdn.net/5020794/uploads/editor/zx/g7p9hv4rhbey.gif

@hupp0013 Looks like we will be starting at the same time. Heyyyy cycle buddy!
@AmeliaBedelia I

your username!

mrs35 · August 2016

Hi, new here. I intro'ed last week but haven't posted yet. Please let me know if I need to do something differently.

Are you benched or TTA?
Benched
What brings you here?
I had a loss and D&C June 18th. I'm on CD60 so my OB perscribed me Provera.
How long do you think you'll be here?
Hopefully only a few weeks.
How have things been going?
Ok. Trying to keep busy!
Any R/R/CS?
I've never taken Provera and am nervous about it for some reason! I am ready to start my next cycle though. Are there usually side effects to Provera?
GTKY: What are you looking forward to this week?
I am mostly looking forward to next week! DH and I are going on a fishing trip. I am a teacher so I am thankful we are able to get away and end our summer on a high note! This week I will mostly be packing for the trip and getting my classroom ready.

Sugargirl1019 · August 2016

Omgsh is it time for this again already? Thanks @beary67 for starting it.

Are you benched or TTA? Benched

What brings you here? SCH, MMC, D&C 8/4

How long do you think you'll be here? I want to do next cycle. But I don't know.

How have things been going? Very emotional, tired. Yesterday was my first day back to work and I'm tired! At work again. No bleeding as long as DH behaves himself (actually me). I bleed for 3. Weeks. Straight. Clots and heavy bleeding ugh.

Any R/R/CS? uh.. idk. It's hard. /shrug

GTKY: What are you looking forward to this week? Wednesday, a day off. Thursday will be two weeks and maybe we can try something without me bleeding.

stillclever17 · August 2016

Are you benched or TTA? TTA

What brings you here? Travel to an active Zika transmission area in September. Also anovulation this cycle due to PCOS.

How long do you think you'll be here? Until December. We'll wait until 8 weeks after our trip in late September, which will put us in December.

How have things been going? Awful. I'm not ovulating and I can't ttc. I'm so frustrated.

Any R/R/CS? My grandma died. I'm heartbroken. She'll never see my babies. I'll never talk to her again. I want to sleep for a year. Temping does not seem to be going well. It's all a big jumbled mess. I'm not ovulating, as usual. My OBGYN appt got pushed back to the end of September. I plan to get an RE referral then. I'm hoping I'll have that all done by December when we can start ttc again.

GTKY: What are you looking forward to this week? It being over.

@mrs35 When I take provera I get super emotional and want to punch everyone. Other than that, headaches. Nothing too bad. I love fishing!

@NYTino24 Sheesh! so much conflicting advice. 2 months, 6 months, 3 months.

mrs35 · August 2016

@soemthingclever I'm sorry you lost your grandma. I hope you are able to take some time for yourself.
Being over emotional is what I'm afraid might happen! DH might leave me in the woods if he spends a week with me like that! As much as it saddens me to push off ttc even more I think I'm going to wait to start taking it until we get back. I want to be able to enjoy our time!
I love fishing too and haven't been able to go near enough this summer. Partly my own doing as I didn't feel like leaving the house much for awhile. Instead I've made two quilts which is usually my winter hobby.

stillclever17 · August 2016

@mrs35 Thank you. I'm sorry about your loss too. I love sewing. I've not made a quilt, but I'm interested in expanding to quilting after I finish school and things settle down for me.

lmc929 · August 2016

Are you benched or TTA? Benched, awaiting my first period after getting my IUD out. Doctor recommended I wait until my first regular cycle.

What brings you here? See above.

How long do you think you'll be here? Hopefully not much longer!

How have things been going? Great, it has been lovely not having a period - cant believe I am anxiously awaiting one.

Any R/R/CS? Getting a cold! In August! WTF....

GTKY: What are you looking forward to this week? Fingers crossed that a house pops up on the market that suits our needs and can end our eternal house hunt.

lmc929 · August 2016

soemthingclever I am so sorry about your Grandma! I lost my grandpa a couple years ago on my birthday, its heartbreaking to lose family!

kiwi2628 · August 2016

Are you benched or TTA? TTA

What brings you here? Timing with vacation

How long do you think you'll be here? Less than a month!

How have things been going? Good, except I am confused. See below

Any R/R/CS? QUESTION: Soooo- I am on CD either 3 or 2 or 1 or CD16. I got a positive OPK 16 days ago, followed by negatives. 3 days ago, I had a bright red spot when I wiped, right when I expected (my LP is usually 13 days), so I was like GREAT! And threw in a tampon. Except when I took it out that night, there was only a tiny bit of blood. Weird, but whatever. Overnight- nothing. Thats not weird, I usually dont bleed much, if at all, at night. Next day, basically no blood on the tampon. Today- basically nothing. But when I say basically- its red. Not brown, not old. Red.

Da. Fuq.

GTKY: What are you looking forward to this week? Having a week with no plans! I have been so busy and now I am dead.

NYTino24 · August 2016

@kiwi2628 Are you temping?

kiwi2628 · August 2016

@NYTino24 No. I did for 2 years, and my OPKs and secondary signs always matched with O with temping, so I stopped temping since it was annoying and everything always matched. With my schedule now, temping is simply not a possibility.

tentoeturbo · August 2016

Are you benched or TTA? TTA

What brings you here? Travel to active Zika transmission area

How long do you think you'll be here? 2 more weeks

How have things been going? Pretty good. I've been staying busy with visitors and planning a girls weekend with some friends.

Any R/R/CS? Nothing here

GTKY: What are you looking forward to this week? I'm putting my yoga mat back into service and trying to get back into it. Any yogis have recommendations for websites or videos that are plus-size friendly?

@hupp0013Does this 8 weeks thing seem arbitrary to you?? I mean, I didn't get bit, but being the rule follower I am, I guess I'm not willing to risk going for it before then

But @NYTino24 six months?! No, I can't, I just can't.

NYTino24 · August 2016

@kiwi2628 I had an extremely weird cycle, with one heavy day and the rest mostly spotting. I ovulated within a day of last cycle and had the same LP / cycle length as the last cycle, but it was weirdly short in terms of actually bleeding. Temping was the only way I knew it was really AF and that it probably wasn't anovulatory. My point is you're regular until you're not - and temping helps clarify things.
@tentoeturbo I know! I was like AWWW hell no!

MollyandD · August 2016

soemthingclever said:
Any R/R/CS? My grandma died. I'm heartbroken. She'll never see my babies. I'll never talk to her again. I want to sleep for a year. Temping does not seem to be going well. It's all a big jumbled mess. I'm not ovulating, as usual. My OBGYN appt got pushed back to the end of September. I plan to get an RE referral then. I'm hoping I'll have that all done by December when we can start ttc again.

I lost my grandpa in November and then my grandma basically grieved herself into passing away as well. I still cry thinking of how they will never see my babies. I'm so sorry for your pain. I know all too well the emptiness and how it feels to think of things you wish you could say or share one more time. There are no words I can say to comfort you, but I hope you take time to grieve as you need to. Everyone does so differently.

kiwi2628 · August 2016

@NYTino24I know I ovulated, and when. Its mostly just wondering which day to count as CD1 since its always been about filling a tampon and red blood. I had the red, but not full. It has fully come today, so I think I am going to count today as tentative CD1 and the rest as just spotting. I know everyone on here goes gaga for temping, and I did it for 2 years, but I literally cannot temp now, but its fine because my H and I HIO ED-EOD, so temping wouldnt help me as much anyway.

Also, I cannot stop staring at your siggy

Elyse1384 · August 2016

Are you benched or TTA? Benched

What brings you here? Need to complete one test this cycle for insurance approval before jumping back to FET

How long do you think you'll be here? One month

How have things been going? Up until last night miserable. Lean PCOS here and AF was 2 months late which basically put everything on hold for moving forward with my FET cycle.

Any R/R/CS? PCOS grrrr! AF seems to arrive when I don't want to see her and avoid me like the plague when I need her.

GTKY: What are you looking forward to this week? Visiting my family this weekend! Super psyched as they're a good time.

Elyse1384 · August 2016

@soemthingclever I'm sorry to hear about your grandmother. Ts&Ps being sent your way.

AliciaGoose · August 2016

I just wanted to let you all know that my love-tits here are always hugs for you guys, and not me liking that you're TTA or on the bench like a horrible person

stillclever17 · August 2016

It's been a rough day back at work.

Thank you, @Elyse1384

@lmc929 That's terrible. I'm sorry that happened but especially on your birthday.

@MollyandD You read my mind. I lost my grandpa in November too. I'm sorry about your grandparents. I hate that you know how this feels.

edit- forgot tag

NYTino24 · August 2016

@AliciaGoose, thanks! You and I are usually cycle buddies and have the same name, so I'm always crossing my fingers extra hard for you!
@kiwi2628 I know! It's such a funny Olympic fail, but so mortifying for the athlete. I usually mobile bump, so I don't see it. If it's too disturbing, let me know and I'll get rid of it!
@soemthingclever Hugs!

hupp0013 · August 2016

@tentoeturbo it seems like it to me. In my mind, if it can incubate for 2 weeks and last a week, it seems excessive to have to wait 8 weeks. I am glad that my doctor isn't one of the ones saying to wait 6 months like @NYTino24's doctor. I can also understand 3 months because that is how often sperm regenerate I think.

@soemthingclever I am sorry for your loss.

AliciaGoose · August 2016

@NYTino24 Thanks girl

I really appreciate it! I hope your time TTA passes quickly!

LadyMillil · August 2016

@hupp0013 @tentoeturbo zika virus RNA has been isolated from semen 93 days after infection, although the average seems to be about half that, which is closer to 8 weeks. Since so little is known about zika in semen (it is extremely unusual for a mosquito transmitted virus to be present in semen so it's hard to predict how long it could be there) the 6 months is given to cover a length of time twice as long as the longest observed isolation of the virus from semen to provide the best chance that the virus is not going to be present/transmitted.

LadyMillil · August 2016

Are you benched or TTA? benched

What brings you here? moving, Dh hasn't moved yet

How long do you think you'll be here? I'll be off the bench just in time for next FW, but then I'll be benched from IF treatments

How have things been going? I'm still super frustrated that we're looking at a 7-12 month wait until we can actually do IVF, not for any reason but that the clinic just has a waiting list that is that long and we can't go anywhere else

Any R/R/CS?

GTKY: What are you looking forward to this week? Dinner with a friend tomorrow. I don't really know anyone in the new city so I've been a little lonely

Sugargirl1019 · August 2016

@LadyMillil I'll come hang out with you!! You can talk sciencey nerdy to me about RNA..

RVAmom315 · August 2016

Are you benched or TTA: TTA

What brings you here: Very unhealthy eating habits and lack of exercise. Have to work on me for a bit

How long do you think you'll be here? I'm going to focus on a healthier lifestyle until at least the end of 2016... Then hopefully start TTC in January as I continue a healthy lifestyle

How have things been going?: Just starting with drinking more water, taking PNV and moving a bit more

Any R/R/CS: Just that I hope this damned heat breaks soon so I can get out and start taking walks. It's my favorite thing to do, just walk and be alone with my thoughts!

GTKY: I am looking forward to DH not being on call from work so we can spend quality time together with DS

@soemthingclever I'm so sorry for your loss, I lost my grandma in November, it's been rough

stillclever17 · August 2016

What up, benched/TTA peeps? This thread is dead ☹️. I find posting in WTO to be too overwhelming. I prefer it over here with you guys. Obviously the whole benched/TTA situation is lame.

Sugargirl1019 · August 2016

I've been temping, and I finally reached the temp at which I normally O at. It should drop a little lower for one day and I'm curious to see if I'll turn an OPK and then O may possibly come.

Buuuut I haven't checked a pregnancy test, and I'm still bleeding a bit. So maybe I won't O. I'm just getting my hopes up for my freaking body to correct itself quickly. I may be about 2 days behind my last loss cycle.

No one correct me, I'm just getting my hopes up at finding trends and similarities. I know I could very well just be irregular and not O and be wondering for ages when I'll get AF.

swanbrooner · August 2016

*Lurking/Crashing Thread*
@Sugargirl1019 So sorry to see you back here.

BitterBetty12 · August 2016

@Sugargirl1019 Hey, it's good to have hope! I'm not going to correct you. Bodies do weird things. You could absolutely be gearing up to O!

beary67 · August 2016

@Sugargirl1019 this is probably the worst part for me since the loss. I hate not knowing when I will start a new cycle. Since my cycles are irregular to begin with, I just keep thinking the worst. I'm on CD 32 now and on my 6th day of progesterone. I know getting closure is tough, but I keep thinking starting a new cycle will give me more closure.

I'm hoping your body starts to normalize soon. Do you remember how long it took last time to get a negative pregnancy test? Do you plan on testing?

Sugargirl1019 · August 2016

@beary it took about 3 1/2 weeks to get a negative test, but I O'd CD 20 anyway with positive tests. It went white after I O'd though.

I'm on CD 17 now. I need my stash of mail to arrive

so I can check where I'm at! But my HCG last loss only went to 26000. This time I went all the way to 100,000. This should take longer, and I'm not excited.

BitterBetty12 · August 2016

@beary67 I really hope the Provera does it's thing ASAP. That post loss cycle ending literally did wonders for me emotionally. It was like that long wonky cycle was the last thing tying me pysically to my miscarriage, and I had so much hope for being able to move forward once it ended. It was really the 'final' piece of closure so to say. As much closure as you can get anyway.

@Sugargirl1019 I ovulated CD 30 in my cycle post loss. So even if yours is later this time, there is still a good chance it will happen! And when it does it will be this huge weight lifted off of your shoulders because this horrible cycle will actually have an end date! I think it's good to have hope. Just try not to let it stress you out if it takes a bit longer to happen!

stillclever17 · August 2016

@Sugargirl1019 I guess the good thing about our cycles sometimes being unpredictable or surprising us is that sometimes they actually do what we hope they will do. It's okay to be cautiously optimistic after what you've been through. I hope you turn that OPK and you can start moving forward.

mrs35 · August 2016

@Sugargirl1019 I hope you can start a new cycle soon ❤️ I am on CD 65 after my loss and I wouldn't wish it on anyone.

Sugargirl1019 · August 2016

mrs35 said:

@Sugargirl1019 I hope you can start a new cycle soon ❤️ I am on CD 65 after my loss and I wouldn't wish it on anyone.

Omg

I'm so sorry, c'mon body get your shit together!!

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