@onefootinthebayou I think if you're working from home and have a nanny to help it is practical to want to start easing into work after 4-6 weeks. Honestly at that point all my baby did was sleep and I just sat around watching a lot of tv (and it was too hot to go outside at that point with a newborn). I think with you as career oriented as you are, working from home sounds like a good option. I have a friend who is doing that, she has a nanny who is there all day, but she still will take breaks to breastfeed her daughter (if that's something you're planning on doing). The hardest part of me going back to work was dropping her off at a daycare (I cried everyday on the way to work for awhile), then having to pump during the day in a storage closet.
Essentially I've been told by HR that since I will have only worked there for ten months when I give birth that they are under no legal obligation to give me any time off - paid or unpaid - but I am welcome to use whatever sick time or vacation I have accrued. They told me that I can try to work out something with my supervisor, but nothing is guaranteed and I'm at my supervisors mercy.
@onefootinthebayou I think if you're working from home and have a nanny to help it is practical to want to start easing into work after 4-6 weeks. Honestly at that point all my baby did was sleep and I just sat around watching a lot of tv (and it was too hot to go outside at that point with a newborn). I think with you as career oriented as you are, working from home sounds like a good option. I have a friend who is doing that, she has a nanny who is there all day, but she still will take breaks to breastfeed her daughter (if that's something you're planning on doing). The hardest part of me going back to work was dropping her off at a daycare (I cried everyday on the way to work for awhile), then having to pump during the day in a storage closet.
Yikes, pumping in a storage closet doesn't sound fun I am indeed planning to breastfeed. My parents are already looking into short term apartment rentals near us (they are awesome, if not jumping the gun a little!) My dad even told me last night (jokingly, of course) that if I felt like I couldn't manage the career and the baby I could just drop it off and he'd raise it for 10 years. You kind of have to know my family to understand why that is funny to us but it was his way of pledging their support to us.
My mom is a retired teacher and back when I was born, she dreaded going back to work after her 3 months. She said she cried right before she left me for the first time but as she pulled out of the driveway, she had an overwhelming sense of relief and renewal. She built a great career from there and I consider her my role model. She was a wonderful mother to me and my bro - she did it all - the career and the mothering, so she's my inspiration.
The good news is there are other women in my role who have had children, even if there are some crazy stories as to how they did it. One colleague used to pay her MIL to go on business trips with her and care for the baby so she could breast feed on the trip. She got her her own hotel room and everything! That's a little intense for me but I know I won't be the pioneer of doing this job w/a kid
BTW, I meant to ask you what kind of science you studied since you mentioned it the other night! Are you still in the field or did you transition to something different?
I am a teacher as well. With my son, I had to work up until March 25th to blend my 12 weeks into summer vacation. I stopped working then, and then had him on March 28th. It was amazing and I was able to have 5 months home!
I'm sure it's specified in your contract and is of course different in different states, like you said. I could take up to 12 weeks through FMLA, 8 being paid if I have the accrued sick time and 4 being unpaid.
A teacher friend who delivered in February had Aflac and said it wasn't really worth it because it doesn't kick in until a certain time passes. I'm not sure exactly how that works, I went to look into it and didn't qualify for the number of hours worked because I was a 0.9FTE instead of 1.0FTE. Anyways, I'm pretty sure you need to be covered under short term disability through Aflac before you are pregnant, but they have other plans for like hospital stays and such that could offset the cost of that.
... This thread does make me so very sad!
For this child I prayed, and the Lord has granted me my petition that I made to him. 1 Samuel 1:27 ------------------------------------------------------------------------------ ------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I know this is going to sound odd (and I can hear the STMs laughing) when I say I'd like to take as little maternity leave as possible. I have loads of vacation and a home office (I am responsible for being on the road with clients nearly every week, however, but the possibility to work from home exists. I have no office to report into every day so my situation is fairly unique.) My job is very competitive and I'm not in a position where I want to let another person come into my territory and manage my clients. I dealt with that for 18 months with a nightmare coworker who finally flamed out and left the company. Now I'm guarding my job and my clients fiercely and I cannot afford 3 months off. I plan to hire a night nurse and a nanny right away and I'll be able to work from home (hopefully without the travel to start anyway) so I can bond w/the baby. Im very sensitive to not just tossing the baby into the arms of a care giver while I run off back to work but I am making arrangements to make my back to work transition as quickly as possible.
I'm the primary wage earner in our family by 3-fold and I need to work as much as possible until H makes partner in his law firm (if we are lucky enough for that to happen) at which point I can start to dial it back. I know it sounds nuts and I can hear everyone saying "Hahaha wait til baby comes, you ninny" but I'm extremely career focused, in fact so much so that I very nearly chose that over starting a family. We'll see but right now I'm looking for 4-6 weeks off.
I think 4-6 weeks is reasonable if everything goes smoothly. I officially went back to work 9 weeks after my son was born via c section. I attended an important work meeting (my choice) 2 weeks after baby. I also received all my emails to my phone and had remote set up to work from home. This was all by choice so I could stay current with my sales territory. Good luck to you!
@onefootinthebayou my mom actually told me the same thing when I called her crying about going back to work, she said you won't know until you go, and she actually regretting not going back (she was a teacher also). I'm glad I got to try out full time work, but then decided later on that it was right for my family to leave and stay (mostly) home.
Molecular biology, used to study carcinogens and their effects on the signaling pathways in human epithelial cells. Left that field and became a high school bio teacher, now I teach night classes in science related fields at a nearby university campus
ETA - just saw your intro and that you have a background in micro! My parents still think my degrees are in microbiology no matter how many times I correct them, maybe I should just start saying cell biology.
For my last pregnancy, the company I work for didn't have any paid leave. I ended up with 2.5 weeks off (never waited for doctor's clearance to go back). This time, I used up almost all of my vacation in June and I won't get more until next May. So I will be off right up to my anniversary date (so as to not use all my vacation up); which will be about 6 weeks off. Good news, we have a maternity leave policy now so I get 6 weeks @50% pay. Not great, but a whole lot better than nothing. I'm very appreciative in the change. 6 weeks has got to be better than 2.5.
I just found and read through this today https://typeamomtales.com/2015/01/08/california-maternity-leave-how-to-milk-it/ and even though I'm still a little confused (like, my hormonal self started crying that I have to do all kinds of paperwork and might mess up and then HOW WILL I PAY THE BILLS AND KEEP MY JOB AND FEED MY BABY and DH said "stop worrying, I have a job too. We'll just all live off your breastmilk" and then I laugh-cried until I stopped), it does provide some helpful guidance. Not sure how much applies outside of California though.
*TW* - BFP & MC in March 2016. BFP in June 2016; EDD March 2017. Samuel born February 2017!
@shines721 I teach as well and our leave is similar. Do you have you use your sick days to cover the paid leave? Ours is only paid if we apply sick days. I don't have 30(vaginal) or 40(cs) I start without pay when I run out. I know a few that only had 20ish days and couldn't afford any without and got stuck with less than 4 weeks in order to save a few for when the baby got sick. Soo stupid! And we're in the business of kids! You would think our adminstratoond of all people would get the need for mother baby time!
@shines721 and @kelizr I'm a teacher as well and last time HR wanted to know if I planned to contact my sick bank for extra time. I was only going to have a handful of unpaid days so I didn't but with this babe, I will only have 2.5 weeks of sick time, so definitely looking into my sick bank options! I don't know if you have a sick bank in your district, but it may be worth looking into. It'll be worth it since in my district you NEED to have doctor permission to return and I think I'd have to beg to get approval from my doctor(who errs on the side of caution) at 2.5 weeks! Not to mention I know I won't be ready as well.
@mrsnc@shines721 We have a sick bank, of which I'm a member, but Nope! Can't apply towards maternity leave. How stupid is that?? Apparently not a medical issue?!?!? Or who knows! It annoys everyone, especially those closer to retirement that have hundreds of unused days they want to give the younger moms but aren't allowed. They don't even get compensated for them when they retire, so basically the district makes out... Yet somehow we still have no money/funding. I don't get the system, but I guess that's what happens in a country that doesn't have anything beyond the bare minimum required to support new mothers.
So, with my son, I could take up to 12 weeks through FMLA. 8 weeks could be paid if I had the sick time. I had 26.5 days, so I had to use all of them and was granted the 13.5 from the sick bank. So.. just 4 weeks unpaid. HR was really good with charging me for switching to family health insurance at a decent time beforehand so I wasn't hit with tons. They paid me throughout the summer so I had continued pay until I got to the 4 weeks unpaid. ... I know that by December last time I had money put into another account to cover the unpaid time, so that was helpful. It's amazing how little you can survive on sometimes, we still have some of that money and am going to use it for this baby!
And yesssss.. my district this year (people I am the victim of budget cuts and nontenure status and keep getting laid off!) didn't count pregnancy as a reason to apply to the sick bank because it was "self-induced." Insane and selfish.
This year I'll be in a new district and won't have 12 months behind me to have FMLA be something so I'm in the process of trying to figure that out with the new system and how they will handle the leave. "Hi, I accept the job. By the way, I want to make you aware that I'm pregnant." Terrible!
For this child I prayed, and the Lord has granted me my petition that I made to him. 1 Samuel 1:27 ------------------------------------------------------------------------------ ------------------------------------------------------------------------------
My job sucks. I only get paid vacation once a year and it is on the day I was hired. I don't get to choose when I take my vacation pay. I can only take 6 weeks leave. And I am a store manager at the company.
Out of curiosity ... does anyone have an outside Aflac plan?
I do! I have the hospital AND disability plan. Don't know what I'll get for hospital but it will hopefully pay majority of the hospital bills. The disability I'll get an extra $975 a month on top of state disability. It will be well worth the cost out of my paycheck!
****TW Signature****
DD born 04/28/2002 Married DH 03/25/2017 1st MMC 08/13/2016 2nd MMC 02/14/2017 BFP 06/16/17 Rainbow DS Born 02/05/2018
I have called Aflac, State Farm, and other insurance companies and they all say that pregnancy does not qualify for short term disability.
Really?? I have AFLAC STD plan & it covers pregnancy but you have a 10 month waiting period for pregnancy. We planned our TTC time around this so I'm covered. Maybe it's your state that said it can't be offered? I live in CA so we have pretty generous STD & PFL programs through the state.
****TW Signature****
DD born 04/28/2002 Married DH 03/25/2017 1st MMC 08/13/2016 2nd MMC 02/14/2017 BFP 06/16/17 Rainbow DS Born 02/05/2018
With my first I was at a different job. I got my year off paid by Employment Insurance (EI) but nothing from my firm. This time I will get 2 weeks of STD and then topped up to 100% pay for 15 weeks. After that, just EI for however long I take off. I might share the parental leave with DH since he gets 12 weeks of partial top up at his job.
@DaniBanani16 Check out your company's medical leave policy. A birth requires hospitalization and your doctor to sign off on you saying you are medically able to return to work. This should fall under their short term disability policy. It probably won't be a ton of time due to you being a fairly new employee, but it should help you some.
This thread makes me so sad for the state of family leave in the US. I guess I should count myself fortunate that I get 16 weeks at 100% pay, and my husband gets 12 weeks at 100% pay. He will likely not take all of his at once, maybe 6 weeks at first and 6 weeks after I go back or something like that -- we will play it by ear. He also has a ton of vacation saved up that he can use. I haven't told work about the pregnancy yet, so I haven't looked into whether I can take additional time unpaid.
I'm guessing that I will have to take some short term disability before I give birth, which would be such a huge pay cut that it's essentially unpaid, but would rather do that and have more time home with the babies once they're born.
im surprised to hear that some short term disability plans exclude pregnancy? I've only ever paid attention to the policy at two jobs, but they both definitely counted pregnancy....
So here's my question. My company will pay up to 12 weeks 100%, and then an additional 12 weeks at 75%, but only if my doctor doesn't sign off on me being well enough to return to work. So if my doctor tells me at 6 weeks that I can go back, then my company will stop paying and anything I want to take after that will be completely unpaid. (Our maternity policy falls under our STD policy instead of separating the two.) What if I just tell my doctor that they'll pay up to 12 weeks and ask him not to sign off on me? Has anyone worked with their doctor like that? When I had an ankle surgery my doctor asked ME how long work would pay and then he automatically refused to sign off on me until I'd maxed out that benefit. Has anyone else been in this situation?
My doctor told me that they would write me off as long as I wanted to be off. I only get paid if I use my leave which I will. However I can only be off up to 12 weeks
My company will give me 6 weeks paid (8 if I require a c section). Unfortunately I do have to use one week of my pto during my "waiting period" until the short term disability kicks in. After that we are just covered under the federal fmla. I have enough pro saved up that I should be able to get to about 11 weeks paid total.
I wish my husband had more time off, he needs to look into it more but he is at a small independent company (less than 50 employees) and he only gets 2 weeks off per year. He could take both off at once but then he's out the rest of the year.
married 10.10.14 @ Turks & Caicos yorkie mama to Oscar FTM EDD 3.12.17
For DD, I took off 7 weeks prior to my EDD due to some medical issues, but DD came 4 weeks early. I took 8 weeks paid disability for my CS, took the 12 weeks of bonding (got paid for 6 weeks), then my employer allowed me an additional 30 days personal LOA. I supplemented my pay with PTO. For #2, I'm hoping to do the same.
@adpralle it can be considered fraud for doctors to do this. I was allowed 8 weeks paid by my work, my doctor wouldn't give me anything over 6 weeks so I ended up having to pay my employer back once I went back and turned in my paperwork. I was super mad about this until a friend who used to work in insurance claims told me the doctor could get in a lot of trouble if they signed off more time than actually needed (and I had a total clean bill of health by 6 weeks).
Essentially I've been told by HR that since I will have only worked there for ten months when I give birth that they are under no legal obligation to give me any time off - paid or unpaid - but I am welcome to use whatever sick time or vacation I have accrued. They told me that I can try to work out something with my supervisor, but nothing is guaranteed and I'm at my supervisors mercy.
Same for me. Started a new job at 5 weeks. Won't qualify for STD or FMLA and their handbook makes no mention of maternity leave (male dominated company). Oh, and I'll have earned a whopping 4 days vacation by then.
Re: Maternity Leave
My mom is a retired teacher and back when I was born, she dreaded going back to work after her 3 months. She said she cried right before she left me for the first time but as she pulled out of the driveway, she had an overwhelming sense of relief and renewal. She built a great career from there and I consider her my role model. She was a wonderful mother to me and my bro - she did it all - the career and the mothering, so she's my inspiration.
The good news is there are other women in my role who have had children, even if there are some crazy stories as to how they did it. One colleague used to pay her MIL to go on business trips with her and care for the baby so she could breast feed on the trip. She got her her own hotel room and everything! That's a little intense for me but I know I won't be the pioneer of doing this job w/a kid
BTW, I meant to ask you what kind of science you studied since you mentioned it the other night! Are you still in the field or did you transition to something different?
[url=http://www.thebump.com/?utm_source=ticker&utm_medium=UBB&utm_campaign=tickers][img]http://global.thebump.com/tickers/tt1d2ae4[/img][/url]
I'm sure it's specified in your contract and is of course different in different states, like you said. I could take up to 12 weeks through FMLA, 8 being paid if I have the accrued sick time and 4 being unpaid.
A teacher friend who delivered in February had Aflac and said it wasn't really worth it because it doesn't kick in until a certain time passes. I'm not sure exactly how that works, I went to look into it and didn't qualify for the number of hours worked because I was a 0.9FTE instead of 1.0FTE. Anyways, I'm pretty sure you need to be covered under short term disability through Aflac before you are pregnant, but they have other plans for like hospital stays and such that could offset the cost of that.
... This thread does make me so very sad!
1 Samuel 1:27
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How in the (expletive) am I supposed to return to work after two weeks?!?!?
Molecular biology, used to study carcinogens and their effects on the signaling pathways in human epithelial cells. Left that field and became a high school bio teacher, now I teach night classes in science related fields at a nearby university campus
ETA - just saw your intro and that you have a background in micro! My parents still think my degrees are in microbiology no matter how many times I correct them, maybe I should just start saying cell biology.
https://typeamomtales.com/2015/01/08/california-maternity-leave-how-to-milk-it/
and even though I'm still a little confused (like, my hormonal self started crying that I have to do all kinds of paperwork and might mess up and then HOW WILL I PAY THE BILLS AND KEEP MY JOB AND FEED MY BABY and DH said "stop worrying, I have a job too. We'll just all live off your breastmilk" and then I laugh-cried until I stopped), it does provide some helpful guidance.
Not sure how much applies outside of California though.
*TW* - BFP & MC in March 2016.
BFP in June 2016; EDD March 2017.
Samuel born February 2017!
So, with my son, I could take up to 12 weeks through FMLA. 8 weeks could be paid if I had the sick time. I had 26.5 days, so I had to use all of them and was granted the 13.5 from the sick bank. So.. just 4 weeks unpaid. HR was really good with charging me for switching to family health insurance at a decent time beforehand so I wasn't hit with tons. They paid me throughout the summer so I had continued pay until I got to the 4 weeks unpaid. ... I know that by December last time I had money put into another account to cover the unpaid time, so that was helpful. It's amazing how little you can survive on sometimes, we still have some of that money and am going to use it for this baby!
And yesssss.. my district this year (people I am the victim of budget cuts and nontenure status and keep getting laid off!) didn't count pregnancy as a reason to apply to the sick bank because it was "self-induced." Insane and selfish.
This year I'll be in a new district and won't have 12 months behind me to have FMLA be something so I'm in the process of trying to figure that out with the new system and how they will handle the leave. "Hi, I accept the job. By the way, I want to make you aware that I'm pregnant." Terrible!
1 Samuel 1:27
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DD born 04/28/2002
Married DH 03/25/2017
1st MMC 08/13/2016 2nd MMC 02/14/2017
BFP 06/16/17 Rainbow DS Born 02/05/2018
DD born 04/28/2002
Married DH 03/25/2017
1st MMC 08/13/2016 2nd MMC 02/14/2017
BFP 06/16/17 Rainbow DS Born 02/05/2018
I'm guessing that I will have to take some short term disability before I give birth, which would be such a huge pay cut that it's essentially unpaid, but would rather do that and have more time home with the babies once they're born.
im surprised to hear that some short term disability plans exclude pregnancy? I've only ever paid attention to the policy at two jobs, but they both definitely counted pregnancy....
I wish my husband had more time off, he needs to look into it more but he is at a small independent company (less than 50 employees) and he only gets 2 weeks off per year. He could take both off at once but then he's out the rest of the year.
yorkie mama to Oscar
FTM EDD 3.12.17
DH: 39 Me: 38
DD 6.14.14