Strangers reaching to touch our LO

Re: Strangers reaching to touch our LO

• MoRay05 member

  July 2016

  I hate it too! I usually just start pushing the stroller or cart away when they start reaching. I've only hate one lady touch his hands and as soon as she walked away I got out my wipes. They mean well but they don't think about germs. Hopefully your signs work but they may not take the time to read it. 

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• rachswi member

  July 2016

  I know I'm in the minority but it really doesn't bother me when people touch Zeke. Granted, I live in a small town with a decently large elderly population and they just want their baby fix. 
  
  Germs dont bother me since he puts everything in his mouth anyway and exposes himself to plenty already 

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• elbou member

  July 2016

  I agree with rachswi...germs don't really bother me much either. At this point germs are mostly helping to build their immune system, so it's good to let them be exposed to a bit more now. I don't get worried unless the person is obviously sick. Even then, sick with a cold doesn't bother me, as his siblings have all been sick with worse more than once since he was born.  

  
  

  

  

  

  

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• Elyse1384 member

  July 2016

  Count me in the unphased group.  My kids are in daycare anyhow and far more apt to pas the germs than to receive.  Some folks just love a good baby fix.  I get it and it doesn't bother me.  

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• Ceridwen77 member

  July 2016

  I've got a daycare kid too so I'm not really phased by the germs. I just let these people say hello, then wipe her hands if I feel the need. As long as they're just doing a little hello and touching her hand or foot it isn't a big deal to me. 

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• doodleoodle member

  July 2016

  I just wipe my baby's hands with a Johnson's hand and face wipe after an encounter. They kill 99% of germs. I've kind of gotten a bit lazy about it though tbh. I did have a relative kiss her on the mouth though and I internally freaked out. I didn't say anything because I was afraid if I opened my mouth all kinds of explicatives would come out.

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• PocoHR member

  July 2016

  I am amongst the unphased as well. I actually think it's really sweet and makes doing things like the grocery store way more fun. Your kid is going to lick and eat way more disgusting things and get more germs that way, so why give trouble to kind strangers?

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• wimamaof2 member

  July 2016

  We ended up getting the sign and placed it on the car seat.  Works great!  On Sunday, we went out to brunch.   It was super hot.  A very sweaty lady came over and just looked at LO after reading the sign.
  We do expose LO to germs.  We have 3 dogs.  We no longer sterilize everything. 
  I don't know if the nice people washed their hands after using the bathroom, etc.  I had a boss who wouldn't wash her hands after using the bathroom.   I know this bc we were coincidentally at the restroom at the same time.
  I guess it's just me and DH.  We don't want random strangers touching our baby.  If the sign keeps them at a distance, then it's doing what it's supposed to.

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• AmoLovesAud member

  July 2016 edited July 2016

  I'm less worried about the germs and more worried about my kid's right to personal space.  Two very nice and well meaning older people have touched Kiddo's legs.  She has adorable chunky thighs, I get it, but please don't just grab a (very young) stranger's leg?!
  

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• PocoHR member

  July 2016

  I don't think babies understand personal space, seeing as how they reach out and touch anything and anyone they feel like touching! I really believe we should encourage and not discourage this kind of friendly interaction with strangers. People live such isolated lives, babies are one way to connect. I really truly believe in supporting friendly interaction and even normal, kind, little bits of touch. Who knows what it might mean to those women? I really do not believe it harms, I think it helps build trust, and makes kids happier. 

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• AmoLovesAud member

  August 2016 edited August 2016

  Even if my kid isn't old enough to fully grasp personal space, it's still not okay.  Maybe I'm more sensative bc my kid is a girl and one of the strange people touching her was a man.  Let me phrase it differently: a strange old man grabbed my daughter's thigh!  That should not be okay, no matter how old either person involved is.  And I'm not sure it should become okay if the strange man is a strange woman, or if my daughter was my son.

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• wimamaof2 member

  August 2016

  AmoLovesAud said:

  Even if my kid isn't old enough to fully grasp personal space, it's still not okay.  Maybe I'm more sensative bc my kid is a girl and one of the strange people touching her was a man.  Let me phrase it differently: a strange old man grabbed my daughter's thigh!  That should not be okay, no matter how old either person involved is.  And I'm not sure it should become okay if the strange man is a strange woman, or if my daughter was my son.

  I don't think that you're being more sensitive.  I feel exactly the same way.  I want strangers as far away as possible from LO.  They can look at him, talk to him, and that's about it.  I know some may mean well...but how do you know what their true intentions are?  
  I honestly don't care if others get mad because we won't let them touch or get too close to LO.  We don't have a problem with people that we know to hold and interact with him.
  Also, I think it can help them to learn about stranger danger from an early age.

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• VexedMommy member

  August 2016

  PocoHR said:

  I don't think babies understand personal space, seeing as how they reach out and touch anything and anyone they feel like touching! I really believe we should encourage and not discourage this kind of friendly interaction with strangers. People live such isolated lives, babies are one way to connect. I really truly believe in supporting friendly interaction and even normal, kind, little bits of touch. Who knows what it might mean to those women? I really do not believe it harms, I think it helps build trust, and makes kids happier. 

  I don't mind as long as people ask to hold or touch my daughter, but you shouldn't touch someone else unasked unless they're about to be hurt.  I work with a group who teaches caregivers how to wear their babies and so we constantly hold and touch other people's children, but we always always ask first.  If the child is verbal, I will usually ask the child as well.  You can have friendly, kind, fun interaction with people while respecting your child's autonomy. 
  
  I come from this as the mother of one incredibly, incredibly social child.  She's the kind of kid if she saw a weird old man in front of a white van that said "FREE PUPPIES," she'd drag him to an abandoned field to play with the puppies.  She literally used to go up to  homeless people in our city and given them hugs because they, "looked sad."  It's wonderful and sweet that she's so friendly and empathetic, but she has had to be taught explicitly about stranger danger, personal space, and consent to be touched. 
  

  If there's something strange underneath the hood.  Who you gonna call?  Your Doctor.  If there's something weird and it don't look good.  Who you gonna call?  Your Doctor.  Immediately.  If it's new, painful, and possibly pregnancy related get your ass off the internet and call your doctor.  It's for your health and your child's. 
  
  
  
  
  

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• nycmommy13 member

  August 2016

  I don't mind the hands since I can wipe them the second the person leaves, but the face one gets to me a little. i usually just say excuse me and move to step in front of the baby to fix his hat or glasses so the person can't touch him anymore. Either that or say we're really in a rush. Luckily, my baby is in daycare and has developed a pretty great immune system so it hasn't been a problem yet.

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