I swear, if I have a positive labor story in the end of this, I'm going to make it part of my life's purpose to tell every pregnant woman I see, "Yes it's hard but sometimes it's not the worst thing in the world!"
My cousin is a labor and delivery nurse with 2 kids of her own, and I'm so thankful she skipped telling me all the gory stories and instead just asked me what I was scared of most when it comes to delivery and then told me what things they do there in L&D to avoid those things from happening.
I swear, if I have a positive labor story in the end of this, I'm going to make it part of my life's purpose to tell every pregnant woman I see, "Yes it's hard but sometimes it's not the worst thing in the world!"
My cousin is a labor and delivery nurse with 2 kids of her own, and I'm so thankful she skipped telling me all the gory stories and instead just asked me what I was scared of most when it comes to delivery and then told me what things they do there in L&D to avoid those things from happening.
I've done this, haha. Maybe not every pregnant woman I see, but I do make sure to make it a point to tell anyone who has fears about L&D that it can actually be totally fine. I had a pretty uneventful and pain-free L&D with my DS and I want people to hear those stories, too.
DS: June 2008 Married: July 2015 BFP: 5/20/16 | EDD: 1/28/17 | Twin boys born 1/16/17
I know it's not Monday anymore, but my MBF is about my OB's office. I was originally scheduled to see an OB today that I despise (group practice) so I called two weeks ago and asked to switch my appointment. The woman who rescheduled me said they had another appointment at the same time in the same office (closest to my house) with a different OB, so I took it. Today I show up at 8 for my 8:10 appointment at the office and they tell me oops I'm supposed to be at one of their other offices. I distinctly remember talking to the woman 2 weeks ago about how convenient it was that she was able to reschedule me and keep me in the same office, so I know I didn't screw this up.
SO, at 8:05 I get in my car and drive up to the other office even though I have a 9:00 conference call. I get there at 8:25 and sit in the waiting room for 25 minutes until 8:50 when I literally couldn't wait anymore. I told them I had a work call and needed to leave, so I'd like to just forget about the 16 week visit because it was just a checkup and get the 20 week/anatomy scan on the books instead. She was baffled and pushed me to reschedule the 16 week, but she couldn't find any morning appointments this week or next week so it would have to be at the 18 week mark...I told her I wasn't interested doing that because I need my husband go into work late and take DS to daycare whenever I have an appointment, so we have to reschedule my 16 week that far out, then I'd rather just skip it and go straight to the 20 week like I'd originally said. She was so cranky about it and refused to schedule anything - said she'd have to have someone call me to schedule. I didn't have time to get into it with her, so I left pissed off and with no appointment scheduled...and then had to get on a client call and be pleasant.
It's not Monday anymore, but I was talking to my best friend about the shower, that she offered to co host with my mom. She lives in MN (my parents do too) and I live in Iowa. When I told her we want to have the shower at our house instead of up in MN (we had our wedding shower in MN that she also hosted) she spent hours trying to talk me out of it, even though our house is the most centrally located for all friends and family to get to, and I do not want to haul shower gifts back from MN! Am I being crazy? It really bugged me that she was so against it, I think she just doesn't like making the drive down and is trying to avoid it
I hate all those "just wait" people. The ones who respond to your birth plan or sahm/go back to work plan or your breastfeeding plan or sleeping arrangements plans with "oh you have no idea, just wait". It made me so furious with my first pregnancy because guess what random person I am aware that labor hurts and can take a while, I know babies cry and poop and don't always sleep the way you want them to. I know that breastfeeding is hard and that formula feeding gets you shamed. I know all that. It's not breaking news. I'm not getting it as much with this pregnancy but I think once it becomes obvious I'm pregnant I'll get a lot of horror stories about going from 1 kid to 2. I know it's gonna be an adjustment but your horror story isn't helping. But thanks for your assvice.
Yesterday my doctor's office called and needed to move my appointment for the next day around. Okay, whatever. They move it an hour earlier, which actually works better for me. So fine. I get there this morning (15 minutes early like they ask) and I am the first person in the waiting room, and I sit in the waiting room for an hour. People come, people get taken back, people go. I finally got up and said something once 2 women walked out who had been there well after I had. "Oh, Dr X is running late, those other women all had other doctors." "Okay..." and I go sit down again. Another 10 minutes and I get taken back. Have my blood work done and vital done (Nurse is great, thumbs up to her), doctor will be in in just a minute. *wait. wait. wait* no clock in the room so I have no idea what time it is. Get off the bed and get my phone and notice it has been 45 minutes since I was taken back. 30 minutes since I had been last seen by a person. Wait 10 more minutes. Then get dressed and tell the Nurse I am leaving, I have things to do. I am so angry by this time. I even think if the doctor came and saw me I would have bitten her head off. Pregnancy rage was high.
I don't know in what world it is okay to move an appointment last minute and then not see the person until after their original appointment. The office manager apologized and told me that one 15 minute appointment lasted twice as long. Yeah, I get it, I know how things can spiral out of control, but a little heads up would have been nice. I work in a corporate environment and if I am going to be more than 15 minutes late to a meeting I reschedule. I don't know why the same common courtesy would be given in a doctor's office. When the office manager apologized she said "What can I do to make it up to you? What the heck sort of question is that? This isn't a restaurant that can throw in a free dessert. Give me an appointment on my time. Which they did, 30 minutes before the office opens.
I need to join the Ob rants I went into my Ob due to experiencing some cramping. She checked me out said that everything appeared normal and it was probably my body adjusting to a new baby growing before it's completely healed from my last baby (I have a 1 year old). She said just in case she would check me for a UTI and she would call me if it came back positive. This was last Thursday. I have not received a phone call and figured everything was fine. Today I decided to pull up my chart online to schedule my next appt, when I see I have received a new message. When I clicked on the message it was dated last Thursday from my doctor. She was notifying me that I tested positive for a UTI and she sent medication to my pharmacy. I NEVER received a phone call! I am so pissed I called my doctor immediately and was like, since when do you not call people when they test positive for anything especially when your prescribing a medication and bonus I'm freaking pregnant! It's been 5 days It could have gone sepsis!! End rant! I'm still pissed !!!
I hate all those "just wait" people. The ones who respond to your birth plan or sahm/go back to work plan or your breastfeeding plan or sleeping arrangements plans with "oh you have no idea, just wait". It made me so furious with my first pregnancy because guess what random person I am aware that labor hurts and can take a while, I know babies cry and poop and don't always sleep the way you want them to. I know that breastfeeding is hard and that formula feeding gets you shamed. I know all that. It's not breaking news. I'm not getting it as much with this pregnancy but I think once it becomes obvious I'm pregnant I'll get a lot of horror stories about going from 1 kid to 2. I know it's gonna be an adjustment but your horror story isn't helping. But thanks for your assvice.
If it makes you feel any better, I've always heard it easier with two! Lol.... But this might also be my families way of convincing us to have a second right after the first. Who knows. LOL
I have another one (this is gonna be a bitchy week, I can feel it) DH stayed home with his man flu yesterday and called about 8 am this morning bemoaning how awful he felt and how he was gonna come home around noon. So when he hadn't come home by 4 I called him (because I had already wrapped my head around having him home at noon so maybe just maybe I could get some stuff done without the toddler tornado following behind me). So it's 4 and I asked where he was and he goes "it's gonna be a late one today, like 8 or 9" um excuuuuse me? That is a full 9 hours later than you told me this morning. Don't tell me you're gonna be home at noon and then not even bother to tell me it's gonna be 9 PM instead until I ask where the heck you are.
@canavara I just saw your post! I had a glorious labor and delivery so I totally listen to people's horror stories about 5 day long labor and other horrendous things then watch their faces when I deadpan "yeah, well I had a 5 hour labor with 10 minutes of pushing so.... Thanks but I think I'll survive" I realize this one could be awful and totally different but I love to shove it up those jerks faces that they can't scare me.
So we don't have cable - just Netflix and a roku and I found a 3 part special on the PBS roku Chanel called The Nine Months That Made You and I thought it was going to be a documentary about fetal development. The first episode was decent but the second and third part basically turned out to be like 10 stories of really rare bizarre things that can go wrong, like genetic conditions where you can't grow bones. Wtf PBS.
So my daughter's birthday party was fun, but as I had predicted, my MIL drove me insane the whole day. She tried giving my daughter tea. She's 3. There is no reason a 3 year old needs to drink tea.The last thing a 3 year old needs is caffeine. What happened was we were at the restaurant and my MIL asks my daughter "You want something to drink? Here, have some tea," and of course, I'm watching her like a hawk with my daughter because I don't trust her, and I immediately pipe up and say "No, she can't have tea," to which MIL asks why, and in my head I'm screaming at her "I'm her mother and I said no, that's why! That's reason enough!" but out loud I say, "She can't have caffeine, she's too little". And I wanted to stab my eardrums with red hot pokers every time she talked to my daughter, because she uses this high pitched baby talk voice that drives.me.insane. And this sounds awful, but I really hated the fact that she brought, literally, 16 presents. I get that she only sees her maybe twice a year, but I think 16 presents for a birthday is excessive and makes it look like you are seriously trying to over compensate. It's just obnoxious. They weren't expensive things, and most of the clothes and shoes are going to consignment, but it was just awkward and strange that all her gifts filled one table. And the worst was that I could tell she felt smug about it. Then, she was pouting and whiny about the fact that my daughter is very obviously super comfortable with my mom, but isn't with her. My husband tried saying that dd was only more comfortable with my mom because my mom had been at my house longer that day....as if to say that dd had had more time to warm up to her. WTF!?!?! She's more comfortable with her because she sees her all the time and my mom isn't a psycho! But husband doesn't want to hurt his mother's feelings, so he doesn't tell her that dd sees my mom frequently. So that pissed me off. Then MIL made the comment that if they had a newer/nicer car, they'd be up like every other weekend to see us, and I swear the look of horror on my face had to be obvious! And of course she had to throw in the comment "Are you okay? You don't look well today," No bitch, I'm not okay. You're here. Then when it was time for them to leave (FINALLY!) at effing 10:00 at night, she told my dd to give her hugs and kissies. I was gloriously thrilled that my daughter said simply "No". She kept insisting, and even my husband said "Give grandma a kiss, she's leaving", and that's when I spoke up and said that she didn't have to give hugs and kisses if she didn't want to (that's my stance on the issue with everyone, though, not just MIL). I could tell MIL was upset about it, but the messed up part was that she didn't even tell dd goodbye or anything, she just stood there and stared at her. Her husband (who I LOVE, he is very kind), said it was okay and she didn't have to give kisses and hugs, so he just patted her on the head and told her bye-bye. MIL didn't even do that. Mind you, this is the same woman who SPANKED her other grandchild for not giving her a kiss. I'm not kidding. The woman is a piece of work. Oh, and then she didn't even acknowledge my mom or sister at the party, and went and sat at a separate table from them. My mom and sister approached her and said hello, and MIL was just very cold and stand-offish. It was just a very long, very exhausting day. I'm just hoping I don't have to see her again until after the baby is born. And even then is too soon.
I've just got to say that I am getting seriously annoyed at how many times I've had to "pee" in the last 2 days! I don't know what is happening or if the baby moved but I'm in there every half hour! Driving me nuts. End of rant
So my company, which has always had a 32-hour work week (Fridays off) just announced that: we're now doing a 40-hour work week and that there will be layoffs coming soon
I'm a senior employee, but I am now terrified that I'm on the chopping block since their motivation is about freeing up money/expenses not getting rid of dead weight. Normally, I'd be like, "okay, I can get another job, this isn't a problem, I'm in very high demand in my industry..." but... being 4 months pregnant and having just bought a house, I have no idea what to think.
@canavara oh no!! Best of luck with this situation!! Hope it all works out!!
my rant is that despite our clear wishes to keep pregnancy announcements off Facebook, my mom mentioned it anyway and tagged me. RAGE! We hadn't told any other friends, and some of my coworkers are on Facebook. I haven't told anyone at work yet! I get that she's excited (and complaining about how supportive and excited she is makes me feel like Mega Bitch), but my husband and I are very private people and prefer to share the news in small doses.
@MaryNog seriously I would totally make a really really big deal about it and really nip it the bud so she doesn't do it again. You won't want to have to deal with it when LO is born!
@scgirl6113 right??? We've had words...and I'm spending the next 6 months telling everyone that we don't want pictures of this kid on Facebook.
@canavara not very quickly, unfortunately, the thread was already full of comments from randos. I made my entire timeline private, at least to prevent future incidents from showing up on my profile. But, hopefully my reaction to the situation was enough to prevent future postings!
Why is it that when you live over 2.5 hours from any relative, they all flock to your house as soon as they find out your pregnant. Like, you didn't bother visiting when I wasn't growing a human, why NOW? You do know it's another 6 months until the baby comes out right?!?! It's just rough entertaining weekend after weekend after weekend. Especially at the end of 1st tri. I just want to sleep!
@MaryNog I would have lost my shit. My mom called me every other day starting at 5w asking if she could announce on FB yet, regardless of how many times I told her it was our announcement to make. I about lost my mind. She share our announcement post not even one minute after we posted.
ETA: we wanted to wait until we got the genetic screening back before announcing due to our previous loss.
@loveinak uuuugh don't you wish people would just chill the f out?? I get it, you're excited and want to shout the news from the rooftops, but please give your kids the room they need to announce the news as they see fit.
lets hope we all remember this a few decades from now, when our own kids get pregnant. No announcements from our brain chips, or whatever people will have by then
I've been assigned new duties at work as an Executive Assistant and because of this, my old tasks were given to one of the Admin Assistants. I spent 3 weeks training him and created SOPs on all of the tasks he's been assigned. But on Friday my supervisor came to my desk and asked if I had incorrectly informed the AA on how to process a certain form. The AA claimed that I told him to do it one way (which is the way he's been doing it for over a month) but I absolutely DID NOT explain it to him that way and have the SOP to prove it. He blatantly lied to our supervisor to cover his own butt! I was so pissed and really wanted to confront him about it but my husband talked me out of it.
I had this happen, but I was training my supervisor who was and still is the biggest idiot I have ever met in my professional career. I had already been working there for three years when he was hired, so I trained him on most stuff. he later did something wrong at a staff meeting and told everyone, including our Director that he did it wrong because I trained him that way. needless to say I was not very pleased
Thanks! I probably am, but it's still scary! I was so freaked out I called our director of engineering (who's going to be the one in charge of making the cuts in my department) and asked him "Are these cuts going to be based on salary or performance or both? Because I don't want ANYONE to be laid off but I'm a little worried since I'm in a unique position where losing my job could be exceptionally difficult because..." and he was like, "Because you're going to have to take maternity leave in a few months" and I was like, "RIGHT." And he just said, "Obviously I can't promise anything, but if I were you I wouldn't be worried. You're one of our top performers and we need people around who can keep things afloat..."
So it sounded unlikely that I'm going to be laid off but without knowing for certain, so so so so scary.
@MaryNog I would be so livid! I seriously loathe Facebook. And it makes me so angry how when you're pregnant, people (particularly annoying family members) just become even more annoying.
@jlea05 yes yes yes!!!!!! I honestly did not expect that telling my family would being on so many feelings of exasperation and downright unhappiness. And it's all confounded by a massive feeling of guilt, because I know they're happy for us and want to celebrate.
ok in my previous two pregnancies I have never really Suffered from RLP.. But this time around HOLY COW! Go away! Every. Single. Time. That I cough, sneeze, sit up quickly, I am doubled over. Someone please tell me I'm not alone!
@scgirl6113 It is intense! I always kind of ball up now when I feel a sneeze coming on to minimize the pain. Look like a crazy person, but totally worth it. Even if I'm standing, I kind of bend over and raise a knee.
Re: Monday Bitchfest- 7.18.16
My cousin is a labor and delivery nurse with 2 kids of her own, and I'm so thankful she skipped telling me all the gory stories and instead just asked me what I was scared of most when it comes to delivery and then told me what things they do there in L&D to avoid those things from happening.
Married: July 2015
BFP: 5/20/16 | EDD: 1/28/17 | Twin boys born 1/16/17
SO, at 8:05 I get in my car and drive up to the other office even though I have a 9:00 conference call. I get there at 8:25 and sit in the waiting room for 25 minutes until 8:50 when I literally couldn't wait anymore. I told them I had a work call and needed to leave, so I'd like to just forget about the 16 week visit because it was just a checkup and get the 20 week/anatomy scan on the books instead. She was baffled and pushed me to reschedule the 16 week, but she couldn't find any morning appointments this week or next week so it would have to be at the 18 week mark...I told her I wasn't interested doing that because I need my husband go into work late and take DS to daycare whenever I have an appointment, so we have to reschedule my 16 week that far out, then I'd rather just skip it and go straight to the 20 week like I'd originally said. She was so cranky about it and refused to schedule anything - said she'd have to have someone call me to schedule. I didn't have time to get into it with her, so I left pissed off and with no appointment scheduled...and then had to get on a client call and be pleasant.
I'm not getting it as much with this pregnancy but I think once it becomes obvious I'm pregnant I'll get a lot of horror stories about going from 1 kid to 2. I know it's gonna be an adjustment but your horror story isn't helping. But thanks for your assvice.
I realize this one could be awful and totally different but I love to shove it up those jerks faces that they can't scare me.
BFP1 12/24/14 - EDD 09/07/15 (D/C 8w1d)
BFP2 6/12/15 - EDD 2/22/16 (D/C 10w3d)
———
Diagnoses and Treatments
PCOS (myo-inositol, excercize)
Indeterminant levels of APS IgM antibodies (baby aspirin)
Sub-septate uterus (hysteroscopic septoplasty 12/18/15)
———
BFP3 05/02/16 EDD 01/09/17 DS born 01/05/17
BFP4 01/28/19 EDD 10/?/19 🤞🙏
She tried giving my daughter tea. She's 3. There is no reason a 3 year old needs to drink tea.The last thing a 3 year old needs is caffeine. What happened was we were at the restaurant and my MIL asks my daughter "You want something to drink? Here, have some tea," and of course, I'm watching her like a hawk with my daughter because I don't trust her, and I immediately pipe up and say "No, she can't have tea," to which MIL asks why, and in my head I'm screaming at her "I'm her mother and I said no, that's why! That's reason enough!" but out loud I say, "She can't have caffeine, she's too little". And I wanted to stab my eardrums with red hot pokers every time she talked to my daughter, because she uses this high pitched baby talk voice that drives.me.insane.
And this sounds awful, but I really hated the fact that she brought, literally, 16 presents. I get that she only sees her maybe twice a year, but I think 16 presents for a birthday is excessive and makes it look like you are seriously trying to over compensate. It's just obnoxious. They weren't expensive things, and most of the clothes and shoes are going to consignment, but it was just awkward and strange that all her gifts filled one table. And the worst was that I could tell she felt smug about it.
Then, she was pouting and whiny about the fact that my daughter is very obviously super comfortable with my mom, but isn't with her. My husband tried saying that dd was only more comfortable with my mom because my mom had been at my house longer that day....as if to say that dd had had more time to warm up to her. WTF!?!?! She's more comfortable with her because she sees her all the time and my mom isn't a psycho! But husband doesn't want to hurt his mother's feelings, so he doesn't tell her that dd sees my mom frequently. So that pissed me off.
Then MIL made the comment that if they had a newer/nicer car, they'd be up like every other weekend to see us, and I swear the look of horror on my face had to be obvious!
And of course she had to throw in the comment "Are you okay? You don't look well today," No bitch, I'm not okay. You're here.
Then when it was time for them to leave (FINALLY!) at effing 10:00 at night, she told my dd to give her hugs and kissies. I was gloriously thrilled that my daughter said simply "No". She kept insisting, and even my husband said "Give grandma a kiss, she's leaving", and that's when I spoke up and said that she didn't have to give hugs and kisses if she didn't want to (that's my stance on the issue with everyone, though, not just MIL). I could tell MIL was upset about it, but the messed up part was that she didn't even tell dd goodbye or anything, she just stood there and stared at her. Her husband (who I LOVE, he is very kind), said it was okay and she didn't have to give kisses and hugs, so he just patted her on the head and told her bye-bye. MIL didn't even do that. Mind you, this is the same woman who SPANKED her other grandchild for not giving her a kiss. I'm not kidding. The woman is a piece of work.
Oh, and then she didn't even acknowledge my mom or sister at the party, and went and sat at a separate table from them. My mom and sister approached her and said hello, and MIL was just very cold and stand-offish.
It was just a very long, very exhausting day. I'm just hoping I don't have to see her again until after the baby is born. And even then is too soon.
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I'm a senior employee, but I am now terrified that I'm on the chopping block since their motivation is about freeing up money/expenses not getting rid of dead weight. Normally, I'd be like, "okay, I can get another job, this isn't a problem, I'm in very high demand in my industry..." but... being 4 months pregnant and having just bought a house, I have no idea what to think.
my rant is that despite our clear wishes to keep pregnancy announcements off Facebook, my mom mentioned it anyway and tagged me. RAGE! We hadn't told any other friends, and some of my coworkers are on Facebook. I haven't told anyone at work yet! I get that she's excited (and complaining about how supportive and excited she is makes me feel like Mega Bitch), but my husband and I are very private people and prefer to share the news in small doses.
Due 1/21/17
@canavara not very quickly, unfortunately, the thread was already full of comments from randos. I made my entire timeline private, at least to prevent future incidents from showing up on my profile. But, hopefully my reaction to the situation was enough to prevent future postings!
ETA: we wanted to wait until we got the genetic screening back before announcing due to our previous loss.
lets hope we all remember this a few decades from now, when our own kids get pregnant. No announcements from our brain chips, or whatever people will have by then
@canavara FX you're safe in your position!
So it sounded unlikely that I'm going to be laid off but without knowing for certain, so so so so scary.
SaveSave
Due 1/21/17
BFP1 12/24/14 - EDD 09/07/15 (D/C 8w1d)
BFP2 6/12/15 - EDD 2/22/16 (D/C 10w3d)
———
Diagnoses and Treatments
PCOS (myo-inositol, excercize)
Indeterminant levels of APS IgM antibodies (baby aspirin)
Sub-septate uterus (hysteroscopic septoplasty 12/18/15)
———
BFP3 05/02/16 EDD 01/09/17 DS born 01/05/17
BFP4 01/28/19 EDD 10/?/19 🤞🙏
Due 1/21/17