UO- 7/14

sammyl1221 · July 2016

I'll kick it off..... I love watching Maury when I'm home. I get really into it too.

Image: https://us.v-cdn.net/5020794/uploads/editor/q6/cvtmopn8k6fs.gif

dmontgo · July 2016

This isn't a UO but something that bothers me:

Schizophrenia DOES NOT mean someone has a split personality. That is Dissociative Identity Disorder, and it is rare....rarer than Schizophrenia or Schizo-Affective Disorder (schizophrenia +mood disorder, like depression).

I heard some girls talking about a boyfriend, about how one minute he was nice and then other times he would be mean for no reason. "He must be schizo or something! Blah blah blah. What a psycho!"

Schizophrenia is a paranoid delusion and being out of touch with reality. People that "appear" to have split personalities in relationships or are extremely manipulative with no empathy or regard towards others are more likely to have a cluster B personality disorder or be bipolar (manic/depressive, for example) than be schizophrenic, such as:

-Borderline Personality Disorder
-Histrionic PD
-Antisocial PD (layman's term--psychopathy/sociopathy)
-Narcissistic PD

Etc etc.
People suffering from Schizophrenia are generally not "psycho" and are mostly a danger to themselves because for many the voices they hear are self-loathing or part of a religious delusion of persecution. There are outliers, of course, but the majority are at risk of suicide vs. murdering someone else. Many people with this disorder are extremely intelligent and struggle with high anxiety, depression, and even addiction. A lot also tend to be religious. For some, medication leads to a normal life, and for others, they are stuck in a loop of a continuous episode.

I understand they were not trying to be rude or purposefully ignorant, but I see this a lot in TV shows or in songs and such, and it sheds a lot of negative light on the people that suffer with it, as if they are inhuman. There's a lot more I could say but I'll step off my soapbox now. Thank you for reading!

penelope4612 · July 2016

@dmontgo - I feel that way a lot. Most mental illness is still marginalized. And I'm tired of hearing how the people who shoot up places "must be mentally ill". Sure, most of them are probably psychopaths, but other than the guy in Colorado, I don't think most of them have a mental illness that makes them not able to understand what they were doing or that it was wrong. I think it makes people feel that anyone with mental illness is at risk of "going crazy" at any second, which isn't helpful for people who should be in treatment, or who want to function in society without constantly getting the message that they are a lesser person.

DiFazette · July 2016

penelope4612 said:

@dmontgo - I feel that way a lot. Most mental illness is still marginalized. And I'm tired of hearing how the people who shoot up places "must be mentally ill". Sure, most of them are probably psychopaths, but other than the guy in Colorado, I don't think most of them have a mental illness

@penelope4612 I'll take that a step deeper. How would we know? Mental healthcare is hard to get, nearly impossible to keep (because everyone wants to throw a diagnosis and a medication and send the affected on their way) and still has such an unfortunate stigma. Look at all the returning veterans who can't get an ounce of help. I think there is so much undetected mental illness for this reason. It's sad.

dmontgo · July 2016

@penelope4612 Mental illness is such a tough subject because the mind is incredibly complex. You can have a mental illness and still distinguish right from wrong, which is why a lot of people that claim mental illness in court still go to jail instead of a mental institution. A big problem is that the people that do have, say, personality disorders rarely get help because they don't believe they have a problem...it's always everyone else. The people that do recognize they have an illness like you said feel marginalized to the point that it's a stigma for them to pursue treatment.

Anxiety and depression are getting more support since they are so common, but a lot of people still don't understand how debilitating those things can be. There are so many more illnesses out there that people suffer with or even encounter in relationships that they feel lost and confused, or blame themselves after they become victims of a malignant personality.

But yeah..education is so important and we just have a long way to go!

dmontgo · July 2016

@DiFazette Really great point about veterans. It's truly an epidemic. That's why suicide rates are so high, even though the military does a lot of "training" on suicide prevention and detection. They may do the training, but the underlying message is, "Only wimps who aren't HOOAH have mental illnesses." Sad indeed.

fauxpa-2 · July 2016

I'm sooo sick of people using "mental illness" as a reasoning behind why people do horrible things. On one hand, I'm totally in the camp that thinks we need to tone down the labels when it comes to mental illness. I simply don't like the labels when it comes to mental illnesses because for me it just adds to the stigma. It creates more of a divide and an "us vs them" mentality. I truly don't believe that mental illness is something that you either have or don't. It's a sliding scale and every single person has a threshold for "snapping/breaking down". That threshold is going to be different for everyone, and everyone is going to react differently, but that doesn't make them any different from anyone else.

I also totally agree that mental health support is way too hard to get and we really need to overhaul how we view and treat such matters in the US. It is completely disgusting that the only way some people can keep their loved ones who are hurting safe is to have them arrested.

brittnic86 · July 2016

Mental illness is also a very broad range of disorders, and the ones that are most common aren't talked about enough. I think people hear mental illness and they think schizophrenia, sociopaths, psychopaths, multiple personality disorder. Less commonly people think depression, bipolar disorder, anxiety....

I think depression is something that is way to taboo in our society. People don't get help because they don't want to be labeled a certain way, or they're told it's just a phase and to cheer up. My sister is bipolar, and she seriously didn't get help for over 4 years, because she didn't want people to think she's crazy. I battled depression for a really long time, and it wasn't until I admitted I had a problem, needed help, AND started talking openly about it to others that things got better for me.

Mental illness needs to be treated just like any physical illness, and I think people don't realize this.

dmontgo · July 2016

@fauxpa Great points about it being a sliding scale! A psychologist told me once that everyone has individual traits of mental illnesses, but it's when those traits become a pattern that it's an actual illness. I think that's an important thing to keep in mind before we look down our noses at those struggling. However, I also think it's good to keep in mind that it's ok to distance ourselves from those who do not wish to get help. Mental illness affects more than just the person with it.

@brittnic86 Thank you for sharing your story! I struggle with depression and anxiety, and it is mind-blowing how many people are still under the assumption that you can "snap out of it." So glad you were able to get the help you need, and your sister too. It is a hard battle that most take for granted.

penelope4612 · July 2016

@dmontgo - personality disorders are also incredibly difficult to treat, if someone does actually seek help. There are no medications indicated for a personality disorder. Therapy can be helpful in some situations (i.e., DBT for borderline PD) but, as you mentioned, it's very difficult to get people with personality disorders to engage in therapy because they don't think they are the problem (or can't acknowledge that they have a problem consistently enough to maintain significant treatment progress).

And your point about having mental illness and being able to distinguish right from wrong is exactly my point. Psychopaths are mentally ill in the sense that there is evidence that their brains work in a different way than other people and that causes them to be how they are but at the same time they KNOW they should not kill or rape or whatever. They just don't care. They don't have empathy. And I think they are, to some extent, the ones causing various problems in society (i.e. school shootings) and being labeled as mentally ill, and then Joe Schmo doesn't want to see someone for depression and be put in the "crazy" category,

cjt121413 · July 2016

My UO is I think Pokémon Go is freaking awesome. Take that, haters.

brittnic86 · July 2016

@cjt121413 ha me too! I don't understand why people are hating on it so much lol. I mean, I haven't done anything dumb, or let it take over my life...but it's fun to tease my husband and tell him I've caught more than him lol.

cjt121413 · July 2016

brittnic86 said:

@cjt121413 ha me too! I don't understand why people are hating on it so much lol. I mean, I haven't done anything dumb, or let it take over my life...but it's fun to tease my husband and tell him I've caught more than him lol.

They're jealous. Seriously, I am not a kid-like person, and I'm not really into games (I'm pretty boring), but it's fun to catch little creatures in my office - I mean, in the park after work hours.

I just wish we had cool games like this when we were kids.

em01092 · July 2016

@cjt121413 @brittnic86 I hit the haters with one of these:

Image: https://us.v-cdn.net/5020794/uploads/editor/sv/blj8k0i0o9k7.jpg

Image: https://us.v-cdn.net/5020794/uploads/editor/a1/wuo367qrxjs2.jpg

dmontgo · July 2016

@em01092 YES

ashleaf2018 · July 2016

Agree with the Pokemon stuff. Like seriously, why can't we let people enjoy things anymore? Why do we make fun of people for having a hobby or a favorite something-or-other?

This may not be a UO but I cannot stand all the unsolicited advice and the mom wars that are already starting early. Like people telling me "I would NEVER do that" or "You'll end up changing your mind" on certain parenting things. I mean, good thing FI and I are the parents and not you!

Sharkey · July 2016

I wish I could love your post a million times, @dmontgo. I've worked in mental health and have seen a variety of disorders, causes, effects, and so on. Te schizo patients were some of my favorites.

Ditto to on the veterans mental health care. I worked with a large portion of vets and it's so sad to see the lack of mental health support. Andplusalso, it's interesting to see how military life in general affects a persons mental health. Many soldiers have issues that are not related to combat but military life/treatment/adjustment in general.

My opinion is that people with mental illness are neither more or less dangerous than someone who doesn't suffer from mental illness. That is such a crock of shit.

kbduke · July 2016

I don't know if this is a UO or more of a preggo rant but I hate the dentist. Like really, really hate going to the dentist. It gives me horrible anxiety as soon as I make an appointment up until I'm done. So I did extensive research and found a new dentist that specializes in dealing with anxiety issues and a whole host of other things. They have great reviews etc, etc. So I had my first appointment today and it was horrible. The dentist and staff were super pretentious and did nothing to alleviate my anxiety at all. I'm so upset that I wasted all of that time (and money since you have to pay upfront for their incredibly expensive care and then they send it to be reimbursed).

Kacie209 · July 2016

With the Pokemon Go! craze... I'll admit that it doesn't interest me (although can see how it could be fun). However, I also wasn't into it as a kid/teen. If I had been, I'll admit that I would SO be playing this game. Not that you can't play the game if you haven't liked it in the past, but I am all about nostalgia!

Now, I didn't get into Harry Potter until I was in my mid-20's, but if this was something HP related... I'd be all over that! I am still a kid at heart.

@kbduke Sorry to hear about your dentist situation, especially after all that research.

I know quite a few people with anxiety when it comes to the dentist. I don't mind the dentist; however, the last time I had to go was to get a chipped tooth corrected. They told me that it was so minor I wouldn't need Novocaine, which I was pumped about. I get there and what do they give me? Novocaine. I was not happy, as I hate needles and hadn't prepared myself for it.

Toller · July 2016

@kbduke so sorry you had such a bad experience!! If you feel as strongly-- make sure you leave a review online somewhere where others can be warned who are in a similar situation!! Maybe you can call the dentist too and tell them how you felt and see if they care at all too....

slartybartfast · July 2016

When talking about breastfeeding, if someone asks if you've breastfed and you exclusively pumped... to me the answer to that question is YES! You breastfed like a freaking hero. Pumping for me was far more work than feeding directly to the baby.

cjt121413 · July 2016

@slartybartfast Oh yeah, EPing has to be WAY more work. You have to sit there and pump, plus do the bottle feed and cleaning. That's rockstar shit right there. They deserve all the BFing credit.

@kbduke I'm so sorry about your negative dentist experience.

@Kacie209 I wasn't into Pokemon as a kid (I was too old by the time it came around), but DS is Poke-obsessed so I downloaded the app "for him." Little did I know how fun it would be to catch those little suckers.

karmba · July 2016

@sammyl1221 my BIL loves Maury, he gets a real kick out of it. We want to get our dog tested to see what kind of breeds she has mixed in and he wants to read the results like he's Maury. "Border collie you are NOT the father" etc etc.

kbduke · July 2016

Thanks everyone. I'm definitely leaving an honest review when I calm down a little.

Also while I was there the dental hygienist was talking about feeling the baby move. I mentioned (at 19W as a FTM) that I didn't think I've felt anything yet. She freaked out about how something must be wrong. Umm... sorry but if my doctor and anatomy scan said everything is going perfectly on Monday I'm going to listen to them not some random woman.

brittnic86 · July 2016

@em01092

And I totally collected the cards as a kid lol.

phoenix870509 · July 2016

brittnic86 said:

@em01092

And I totally collected the cards as a kid lol.

OMG I told my friend something around these lines when she started bashing me for playing it. I'm well aware what is going on in this world. It kills me sometimes. This is one of the ways I escape it. Other ways include reading, watching movies and playing games with DH.

DiFazette · July 2016

slartybartfast said:

When talking about breastfeeding, if someone asks if you've breastfed and you exclusively pumped... to me the answer to that question is YES! You breastfed like a freaking hero. Pumping for me was far more work than feeding directly to the baby.

Word. I EP'd and it was sofa king hard. However, I didn't breastfeed. I pumped. My baby still had Breastmilk, but there are additional benefits of the actual nursing for both babies and moms above and beyond he Breastmilk itself.

sourlemon · July 2016

My UO: I love one direction.

zubenescamali · July 2016

I don't like the term "breastfeeding" and I don't know why. There's nothing wrong with it. It's technically accurate. But I lean toward using the term "nursing" for some reason and twinge when people say breastfeed.
Unless I'm being lazy and abbreviate BF. Then it's okay.

cayaylonglegs · July 2016

@sourlemon - that's the best opinion you can have. I fully admit that up until maybe a year ago i has no idea what songs 1D sang but after I heard Night Changes I became obsessed.

slartybartfast · July 2016

@difazette - see I think breastfeeding = feeding from the breast. Nursing is the word that, to me, implies the baby on the boob. Which, yea, is a dynamic neither gets with pumping.

sourlemon · July 2016

@cayaylonglegs I love night changes! That's really when I started liking them. It was also the song that "comforted" me as I drove home from work after being called home when my grandma died. I used to have that's what makes you beautiful on my running playlist haha. It usually came on when I was struggling up a hill or puking. Lovely, eh?

leksiL · July 2016

It annoys me when people describe their baby in utero as "sweet" "princess" or "prince". That baby could be the biggest screamer on the planet when it arrives -- how do you know it is sweet? and the prince/ss thing makes me feel like they are going to spoil the kid and the kid is going to walk all over them.

I know - it's a silly thing to get annoyed about!

dmontgo · July 2016

@leksiL Related to that, I hate these kinds of pictures that are meant to be for a nursery. Way too creepy and possessive for me!

phoenix870509 · July 2016

@leksiL if this is a girl her name will be Sarah, which means "princess" in Hebrew, so her nickname will be Princess for that reason and that reason alone (and tbh, DH will probably be the only one calling her that).

My UO - we saw the new Ghostbuster movie last night as an impromptu date night. It wasn't that bad. The trailers focus so much on the whole Girl Power thing that it doesn't really do justice to the movie. I'd give it a 6/10. Plus Chris Hemsworth dancing.

cjt121413 · July 2016

dmontgo

Oh yeah, so weird. I really dislike any nursery or baby stuff that refers to baby's future love life.Like this

Image: https://us.v-cdn.net/5020794/uploads/editor/xc/42p0pnkzbokq.png

So annoying and somehow sexist to me. Let the freaking baby be a baby.

PensiveCrayon · July 2016

@phoenix870509 Is the new Ghostbusters something you'd feel comfortable sitting through with your in-laws? Mine really want to see it, and I do too. But if there are a lot of awkward sex jokes, I might try to convince them that The Secret Life of Pets is a better idea...

phoenix870509 · July 2016

PensiveCrayon said:

@phoenix870509 Is the new Ghostbusters something you'd feel comfortable sitting through with your in-laws? Mine really want to see it, and I do too. But if there are a lot of awkward sex jokes, I might try to convince them that The Secret Life of Pets is a better idea...

@PensiveCrayon I would sit through it with my in-laws. There aren't many awkward sex jokes (maybe one or two), but I mean it's Chris Hemsworth so they play on his hotness. I wouldn't call that awkward.

Secret Life of Pets was also awesome, btw. Saw that with DH and some friends on Sunday.

slartybartfast · July 2016

cjt121413 said:

dmontgo

Oh yeah, so weird. I really dislike any nursery or baby stuff that refers to baby's future love life.Like this

So annoying and somehow sexist to me. Let the freaking baby be a baby.

It's very much sexist especially because this is essentially the baby boy equivalent

cjt121413 · July 2016

@slartybartfast Ugh so DUMB.

cayaylonglegs · July 2016

DH only calls my bump princess now. I think it's totally freaking adorable.

Want a personalized experience?

UO- 7/14

Re: UO- 7/14

Choose Another Board

Search Boards