When will you have your baby shower?

ChaoticWolf · July 2016

Hey guys!

We haven't brought this up yet on the board, but when should our friends and family plan our showers (or sprinkles) for? With the holidays being exactly a month before my due date, the traditional "one month before" rule is out for me. Personally, my grandparents mentioned having one sometime in November but that seems so early!

So when do you think would be the best time to have all of our showers?

Vivi20 · July 2016

What is a sprinkle?
And I'm requesting no baby shower for this pregnancy. I had one with my daughter, and it was about 1.5 months before she was born.

LCartee2016 · July 2016

My mom is so excited and already planning a shower for the first week of December.

poetryandoceans · July 2016

My friend is throwing mine, and I told her mid-November would be best; I have a mid-term break from teaching then, and I know myself and that I'm going to need at least a day before to gird my loins and a day after to recover (I am not a fan of being the centre of attention).

I'd honestly prefer not having a shower, but when I tried that with my wedding, my MIL decided I wanted a shower anyway, and just didn't know that I wanted it. So at least this way, my friend who knows my wants and needs for the situation is in charge...

TinaBelcher · July 2016

Mine will be late September/ October (26-30 weeks) because these twins will be born in early December and I'm afraid of having to go on bedrest at the end or measuring like 50+ weeks (on the singleton scale) and having to be "on" and entertaining people.... Noooooope hard pass if possible.

Honestly I wouldn't bat an eye at anything from like 28 or 30 weeks on. One of our best friends just had a sprinkle for a singleton at around 25-26 weeks, I thought that was a little early but only in passing, I didn't actually care

ThePax89 · July 2016

I had mine at 35 weeks pregnant with my first.

ChaoticWolf · July 2016

@jlea05 A sprinkle is just a smaller shower for second time moms or those who want a more intimate setting.

@LCartee2016 Yeah all my family is super excited and having talks about it already too.

@poetryandoceans That's understandable, wanting one in November since you have that mid-term break then. I'll also need a while to mentally prep myself for the attention. I hated it when I had my wedding shower.

@TinaBelcher Yeah twins kinda have their own ruleset when it comes to these things. I guess I'm so used to going to the showers that people have precisely at 34-36 weeks that it might have skewed my perception. Planning and etiquette has a lot of hard and fast rules where I'm from.

poetryandoceans · July 2016

I'm actually a little thankful that I'm due when I'm due in relation to Christmas; I think the hard and fast "no more than 4-6 weeks before due date" would drive me crazy, and I'm so pleased that falls right in the midst of holiday hubbub.

I am going to want time to step back and take stock of what we have and what we still need vs what we may want after the shower, and having to do (potentially) a lot of last minute running around to fill gaps while 4 weeks away from my due date seems like it would make my anxiety go crazy.

scgirl6113 · July 2016

I had mine at 25 weeks with my first because it was out of town for me. But it was great to have it so early in my opinion because we could really anticipate what all we still needed to buy and strategize.

cabu14 · July 2016

My MIL is so freaking excited and will not leave me alone about the baby shower.. which is cute but omg.. She and I discussed it and decided November, the weekend before Thanksgiving will be a good time - mainly because I will have that whole week of Thanksgiving off to play with the baby's new stuff!

aels12 · July 2016

My husband and I built a huge deck on our house last summer and we were really hoping to do a coed inside/outside shower so it could be utilized and do some yard games but the weather here is so unpredictable that I'm not sure that will happen. I would love an October shower but that's way too early I think. My friend is throwing it and we talked about early/ mid November instead, so maybe the weather would still be nice!

edited bc the bump ate my post!

cjs260 · July 2016

My friends told me they were shooting for mid-November. We're all transplants here with multiple family stops for the holidays, so they decided before everything really gets started is best. I think being so close to the holidays, no one will mind it being a little earlier than normal.

mudderbear · July 2016

I'll be visiting my family and friends in another province during weeks 23-26, so if I'm going to get one from them it'll be in that time frame. Where I live people think it's taboo to have the shower before the baby is born...so irritating. For dd we had it a few weeks after she was born and all the cute newborn stuff we got as presents never fit her because she was MASSIVE...totally sucked.

christac1010 · July 2016

I'm due 1/3 and my mom is planning the shower for mid to late October (I'll be 28-30 weeks). We don't want to interfere with the holidays and I want time to get everything ready/get what I still need before I'm too big or too tired. Also DH and I have our wedding anniversary in October so the timing is special for us too.

Knottie1443924966 · July 2016

I'm not sure how to do this.. bc I now live in California and all my friends are in Ontario or Vancouver I can't ask them to fly out for my shower.

And at this time I won't be able to fly myself.

What would you girls do?

katesmama0706 · July 2016

I don't know if I'll have one this time around. Maybe if this baby is a boy because we'll need more new stuff than if it's a girl. But last time we had it about 8 weeks before my due date. My family has a history of premature babies so we didn't want to wait too long and run into having to have the shower after the baby was born! I don't think November would be too early for a shower this time. Especially if you consider travel during the winter for anyone coming from more than a few miles away.

mudderbear · July 2016

Knottie1443924966 said:

I'm not sure how to do this.. bc I now live in California and all my friends are in Ontario or Vancouver I can't ask them to fly out for my shower.

And at this time I won't be able to fly myself.

What would you girls do?

They might just send you a gift! With my dd all my friends in Ontario got together and shipped me a huge parcel full of baby things, it was the sweetest gift ever (and probably hella expensive). Obviously you wouldn't want to ask them for anything but, I'd still maybe send out an invite to the shower?

LoneStar21416 · July 2016

Mine will be around 28 weeks in the second week of October. I'm due first week of January. I will be cross-country traveling for mine. Even if I wasn't, I don't think I'd want anything at 34-36 weeks. That sounds uncomfortable, physically, and too close for comfort for me. I've been invited to two showers this year, neither of which I could attend, but both were when the mom to be was around 30 weeks and she wasn't traveling for it.

nolemomma14 · July 2016

With DS I was 31 weeks at my shower. He was a July baby and we didn't really want to have a June shower because it was going to be outdoors at my in laws and the FL weather is hot enough!

My my mom and stepmom have both already asked me about a sprinkle. Not crazy about it, but not against it either. We shall see.

Smiley-1980 · July 2016

I won't be having one for this baby being my second one (unless it's a surprise) but I had my daughter the exact day I'm due with this one and my shower was mid November.

mrshuse525 · July 2016

My DD was born in January 2014 (on the 22nd) so I was in exactly the same position as we are in now timing wise (this nugget is due on the 28th). My family threw me a shower in early November. I liked this because it gave me time before Thanksgiving and some time after Christmas to make exchanges/returns, buy the things that I didn't get that I still needed, and really get the nursery completely set up before our DD came. I had washed all the clothes, folded and put in the dresser, set up her crib/sheets, set up the baby monitor, car seat, etc. I am planner and needed to have everything exactly right beforehand LOL

LoneStar21416 · July 2016

Knottie1443924966 said:

I'm not sure how to do this.. bc I now live in California and all my friends are in Ontario or Vancouver I can't ask them to fly out for my shower.

And at this time I won't be able to fly myself.

What would you girls do?

Are you not able to fly at all? If you feel up for traveling back to them, which is what I'm doing, you could just plan it a little earlier. I'll be flying at 28 weeks and my OB has zero problem with that.

emilyn2012 · July 2016

I was 31 or 32 weeks for my biggest showers but I actually had 3 with my first!!!! (I know, we had each side of the family bc they aren't close, and then my work threw one). I'm not really expecting a shower this time, although if it was a boy a sprinkle would be great. I'm thinking sometime right before thanksgiving since I'm die 1/28 but will go a little early. I think I had my first shower at 27 weeks with DD

sagoon · July 2016

I was about 32 weeks when I had my shower. Big enough to be satisfyingly pregnant but not so far along that I worried about going into labor at the shower. This time I won't be having one, 2nd baby and all.

Mylitta · July 2016

My aunt brought this up when I told her... I think she and my mom and cousin are thinking mid to early November. I hadn't even thought about it until they brought it up.

sweetyjenj · July 2016

I thought about the whole Holiday thing, too. I've been thinking mid-November would be great, and people would understand the timing because the holidays. Sister said first week of December would be ok, but I just don't want it to conflict too much with holidays parties and events, either.

sweetyjenj · July 2016

How are people doing their shower(s)? One big one, or a few small ones? I have DH's family, my family, friends...it might be nice to just do one big one?

Knottie1443924966 · July 2016

LoneStar21416 said:

Knottie1443924966 said:

I'm not sure how to do this.. bc I now live in California and all my friends are in Ontario or Vancouver I can't ask them to fly out for my shower.

And at this time I won't be able to fly myself.

What would you girls do?

Are you not able to fly at all? If you feel up for traveling back to them, which is what I'm doing, you could just plan it a little earlier. I'll be flying at 28 weeks and my OB has zero problem with that.

Will you be hosting a baby shower there? I'm not really interested in the gifts but the whole experience of the shower with my girlfriends

Knottie1443924966 · July 2016

mudderbear said:

Knottie1443924966 said:

I'm not sure how to do this.. bc I now live in California and all my friends are in Ontario or Vancouver I can't ask them to fly out for my shower.

And at this time I won't be able to fly myself.

What would you girls do?

They might just send you a gift! With my dd all my friends in Ontario got together and shipped me a huge parcel full of baby things, it was the sweetest gift ever (and probably hella expensive). Obviously you wouldn't want to ask them for anything but, I'd still maybe send out an invite to the shower?

That is very sweet of your girlfriends

I was hoping more for the experience to share with the girlies I love not so much the gifts

surlyjaneausten · July 2016

I'm due mid January and planning on early November. I think the idea of having plenty of time to set up and sort out what we still need sounds good. Also, like others have said, it won't interfere with anyone's holiday plans!

rdh33 · July 2016

@Knottie1443924966 :: could you fly to either Vancouver or Ontario earlier on--perhaps in early/mid October? And, it wouldn't have to be for a traditional shower -- maybe a brunch or afternoon with all your girlfriends so that they can celebrate your pregnancy with you.

My doctor told me that she would have no problem with me flying (as long as everything continued to look good) as late as 36 weeks, and 28-32 weeks for an international flight. Ontario might be a bit far for comfort, but the flight to Van is probably only 4 hours or so, right? That should be fine.

I know what you're going through though! I lived overseas (numerous countries) for years, and then have moved three times since coming back to the States three years ago. My husband and I have been in Oregon for four months now and I still barely know anyone -- I telecommute and work from home. My closest friends are scattered across the globe. If I have a shower, it'll probably be very small (but still lovely).

scgirl6113 · July 2016

sweetyjenj said:

How are people doing their shower(s)? One big one, or a few small ones? I have DH's family, my family, friends...it might be nice to just do one big one?

I would this really depends on how your families get along. I ended up with one for each side of the family and it was such a relief for me and way less stressful.

hayhay2501 · July 2016

My friend is throwing me one here in November and then I'm going to have another one after the baby's born (thrown by my moms best friends) when I take it on its first trip to America! Then everyone over there can meet them! I'm unlikely to be able to make another trip over until post birth so that make the most sense.

Renee1105 · July 2016

I'm not having a shower, second baby. My first baby was due early February and my shower was the first week in December. The timing was perfect.

LoneStar21416 · July 2016

@knottie1443924966 my mom is hosting it and my sister and best friend are helping her. I agree with you that for me it's not about the gifts, but celebrating with the people that are closest to me. I don't see my close friends and family as often as I would like based on where we live now, so for me it was important to travel back to them for this. The majority of husband's family lives in a totally separate state from where the shower will be and where we live now. I'm sure some of them will come, but not all. It certainly is challenging when you have family and friends all spread across the country (or several countries!).

hjmorgan-2 · July 2016

I'm thinking mid-October to early-November. I really don't want to interfere with Holiday plans. I always hate it when someone has an even right before a holiday (thanksgiving, Christmas, etc) Plus I have family out of state, and the closer to the holidays the higher the plane tickets! ):

streulim · July 2016

My friend is planning mine for the Saturday before Thanksgiving. I work at a college and have a few days off that week to get things organized before I get too huge to do it. Then I can actually be a little comfortable too.

MandiB07 · July 2016

My SIL really wants to throw the shower. This is my second, but my daughter will be 5 1/2 years old. We didn't think we were able to have more children, but thankfully we were wrong. It was too depressing to keep all her old baby things because we had to keep it all in the spare room. So we got rid of most of it. Things I was able to hide away like clothes, boppy, and smaller items were saved, just in case. We are doing a small shower/sprinkle the weekend after Thanksgiving just for people that I'm closest with. I know it's close to the holidays, but my SIL and I are both teachers so we have off that week.

ceillyang · July 2016

Before or after thanksgiving. December is just way too busy

mommywesley · July 2016

I have no clue yet if we're going to do one before or after baby is born. If we find out gender we will probably have one before baby is born and just do a get together to have family help put the nursery together or something. If we don't find out gender we will probably do a sip and see afterwards.